• Member Since 6th Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen January 31st

ANearPerfectStudent


Hello, my name is ANearPerfectStudent. I am an amateur writer, mostly writing in my scraps of time between work and my growing addiction to gaming. Feel free to PM or chat with me if you ever want to.

T

To many ponies, Twilight is a bookworm, friend, and master mage. In light of recent events, now princess, too. But princess of what? Celestia says it's the stars, but when Celestia's statement is tested, will it hold true? Maybe, just maybe, Twilight has a different meaning after all...

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 35 )

Whatever you do, do not stop with this story. Please?

Great job, I love the concept and the execution is fantastic

Twilight sparkle: Ghost Rider. Starring Nicholas Cage.

so twilight is the alicorn of death?
if yes then it is of most importance that she speaks in CAPITAL LETTERS.

3190636 The execution. You're so punny :derpytongue2:

Well that was abrupt. I realize the desire to get to the 'meat' of a story quickly but here it was a bit quicker then perhaps it should have been. Why would she need to physically change to suit her powers? She should already represent her powers I would think. Also, isn't she the Princess of Magic - her special talent? Why would she be in charge of death? Why'd she check the thermostat, why would that of all things be part of her routine?

It's not bad but those are some of the questions going through my head. I would have liked a longer 'pre-change' section dealing more with her growing concern about what Celestia said (and maybe more dreams to convince her of this), a bit more characterization of her-as-death before she knows it, maybe a change in thought processes to be more fatalistic - that's a bit OOC for Twi though. Something though, something that shows this isn't just 'author's will' to make it happen, something that shows it IS what she is supposed to do. Again, while it's not a BAD idea at all, you'll have to explain why she's the Princess of Death and why she suddenly changed into the Grim Pony. I suppose that last one is easily explained as 'growing into her powers' or something but it doesn't feel like it was set up for that with the extremely sudden change.

All in all, I'm neutral to this.

3193214 :facehoof: Go sit in the corner and think about what you did.

Comment posted by ANearPerfectStudent deleted Sep 12th, 2013

3194585

While most (or all, for that matter :derpytongue2:) of your statements are true, Twilight's last 2 weeks I hope to reflect on later on in the story. About the Princess of Magic though, I would like to note the Alt. Universe tab on it..o and yes, the last sentence is from about 10 different authors saying the same to me. :facehoof: So from them to me to you, there is an alt. universe tag. :twilightsmile:

3195212
shrug

Still need to explain it - alt. u means you can change things but it doesn't mean you can just change them willy-nilly. They need an explanation that's better then 'author's prerogative' or you'll get people bitching. Trust me, it happens to me all the time.

And I got two notifications you replied to me but ... oh. Ohhhhh. Uh.

Good luck.

I am quite intrigued by the story thus far. I do hope you come out with more soon. :twilightsmile:

This is a very interesting story, I hope you update it soon.

3214899

I'll try to write it in two weeks, I'm still getting used to college, so I make no promises as I do want it to be good.

3215661 Take your time. I know from experience just how hectic the first few weeks of collage can be. I would much prefer to be patient, and get a good chapter, rather then getting a quick chapter that's rushed, and full of mistakes. :pinkiesmile:

A good story is ALWAYS worth waiting for. :eeyup: :twilightsmile:

3215883

How ironic, the one who will force others to wait is the one of them for about 15 other stories... I'm typing on my phone at the moment so no emotes for me... *sad face*

5285708

Yeah, I'm kinda horrible with those...

:pinkiehappy: plz update asap cause it's really good :pinkiehappy:

Yes please update I am curious on how Celestia will react to this new Information.:pinkiehappy::twilightblush:

There was a story, wherein Rainbow Dash became the embodiment of death, and had to send Applejack off to the great beyond, after she was killed in a cart accident.

Would like to see this continued. Also a couple things i want to mention.

1. The way you are doing it is fine. But i feel like you are missing some opportunities. You could have death be the silent type. Him only showing and making gestures with his hoof. If you ever watched The Christmas Carol (1984) and seen the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come. I feel that's how death should be portrayed

2. Have there only ever of been one death. With him finding someone suitable to take his role (Twilight) Doing this makes it seem all the more important.

3. While it isn't unbearable. The pacing needs to get slowed down.

4. This also involves the first one. Sense we are just thrown into it and given a better lapse of time. You could have started a couple weeks or months befor her ascension and Twiglight starts seeing the hooded charcter where ever she goes. Then have her ascension be from death starting to give her his position

5. lastly make this seem more dark and gloomy. With some scenes of happiness

But like i said would like to see this continued

I know its been a few years, but this story has a great concept, you should continue it if you can. :twilightsmile:

More More More More More
This fanfic has me completely and totally hooked never stop this halfway

Please continue.

Why was this cancelled?

I too, wish to see more.

I'd appreciate more.

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