A human finds himself in Equestria under very unpleasant circumstances with no explanation.
His reaction: get the heck out of Dodge and start a new life where Equestria and her ponies can't reach him.
But an alicorn's reach is long and the events which brought him here and his treatment in Canterlot are not so easily forgotten by those who did it. How does one say 'go away' to an immortal goddess?

Yay! Featured, thank you all.
A TV Tropes page
Revised 08/31/14 for clarity and grammatical issues, no events changed. I am working on a sequel, but it will be from Fancy's POV.
P.S. Green is NOT Lyra. There are other green unicorns.

Warning: Silliness inbound.

By order of the high lords of Terra themselves, a lone soldier from the Death Korps of Krieg has been sent to the planet Epona to wipe out its Xeno population. Starting with Equestria, the Korpsman has sworn not to leave the planet until he falls or completes his mission.

However, no Korpsman should fight without setting up a proper trench first, and so the Korpsman must dig...and dig...and dig.

Destroying Equestria is going to take a while.

One fateful day, Discord felt a disturbance in the balance of things. Not just him, but Pinkie Pie and Cheese Sandwich, too. They all know what happened.

Laughter had experienced a loss.

This is for the loss that has been endured on 8/11/14, of a comedy icon that never failed to try and make everyone smile. O Captain, our Captain.

A dragon has lived alone for centuries in a cave far beneath the earth. When a pony trespasses on his domain through no fault of her own, what will become of her?

Are you the kind of person who would rather experience this story with your ears than your eyes? You're in luck! Here's a reading of the story courtesy of Thornquill!

The Alicorn Amulet twists its wearer into madness and megalomania. Nopony can wear it without repercussions, both for themselves and others. Nopony is safe. Nopony is exempt.

Still, nopony expected him.

Alone, a young timberwolf must try to survive in the wilderness. Survival above all else. That was what his mother taught him. But when he encounters 'monsters' that could apparently 'gobble him up in mere seconds', he begins to doubt everything he knows about the world.

The story of Equestria, as told by the Tree of Harmony

My entry in the EqD Summer Fanfic Contest

Before Equestria
Before the Elements of Harmony
Before Celestia and Luna
Before Discord

There was a seed.

Thanks to my editors: Sypher, Alex and Tim

Cover Photo: Pony Wiki

Ever since she stopped Sombra and saved the Crystal Empire, Twilight Sparkle has taken an interest in dark magic. Princess Celestia catches wind of her student's interests, and tells her exactly why dark magic is not to be trifled with.

Image was used with permission.

My name is Captain Ares Andrews. I'm an AH-64 Apache pilot attached to the 101st Airborne division in Ft Campbell Kentucky. I'm not suffering PTSD, I didn't get sucked through a portal, or any of that nonsense. In fact, the last time I even heard the name 'Rainbow Dash', I was a college kid. That show went off the air like five years ago! But, regardless of when the last time I dove into the land of pony art and stories was, it doesn't change the fact that I have something in my house that fans of the show would probably kill for. And I have no idea how she got here, when she's leaving, whether or not she's even real. But she's here alright.

Dear Discord,

I'm sure you have found yourself rather bored as of late, seeing as you have given up your true nature to stay reformed. So I have a project for you.

I'm awful curious to know what you do in your spare time, so I'd like you to keep a journal from now on and update me weekly. It will be a good way to kill some time, and it will help me keep tabs on you as you adapt to your new lifestyle. Think of it like a sort of Reformative Exercise.

You can send me your letters via dragonfire, which I do believe you are more than capable of doing so with your own magic. (If not, I'm sure Twilight will always let you borrow Spike,)

I'll be expecting your first letter soon!

- Celestia