The guards are scared to say it.

Sunset Shimmer has returned to Canterlot.

And the Princess is furious...

Not in continuity with my other stories. Just something that popped into my head one day.

Spell Nexus (mentioned only) is from Past Sins, by Pen Stroke

It is finally time for Luna to set everything straight between her sisters. All of them.

An entry in A Thousand Words Contest II and winner of a judge's prize in the Experimental category.

This story is a sequel to Canon Perpetuus, Canon Perpetuus, Canon Perpetuus

Twilight Sparkle, shocked with missing thinking
Sees a thing which did, just now, efface
Itself from all memory and meaning
But just how long has she been in this place?

Twilight Sparkle, shocked with missing thinking
Sees a thing which did, just now, efface
Itself from all memory and meaning
But just how long has she been in this place?

Twilight Sparkle, shocked with missing thinking
Sees a thing which did, just now, efface
Itself from all memory and meaning
But just how long has she been in this place?

Pseudo-experimental literary faffery; a vaguely Gödel, Escher, Bach influenced E-rated horror story in the round.

_{Created for the Thousand Words II contest in the "Horror" category.}

Crime was easy before Princess Twilight and the First Five ushered in a golden age of Harmony. Back then, any idiot could plan a robbery, just like any rat could sneak through the cracks in wooden granary walls. But now that everything is cloudstone and clearsteel, with magical countermeasures over the few remaining holes, it takes a different breed of rat to survive.

"Slippery" Jimmy the Grey is one of the rare few ponies who can still slip through the cracks — even with the legendary Rainbow Corps on his tail. Now he's got a billion-bit heist planned in the gleaming skyscrapers of Cloudsdale. If only he hadn't made the mistake of stealing from a dragon …

Now with a reading by Illya Leonov and Scribbler!

* * *

This is a crossover with Harry Harrison's Stainless Steel Rat novels, but it assumes no knowledge of the series.

Winner of February's Writeoff Association competition! * Featured by Equestria Daily! * Featured by Seattle's Angels!

REVIEWS: "Highly Recommended" by Titanium Dragon; "Recommended" by Present Perfect; rated "Why Haven't You Read This Yet?" by PaulAsaran

WORD OF MOUTH:
"The Iridescent Iron Rat was not only my favorite story from the most recent writeoff... it's my favorite story of anything I've read in months." —Sharp Spark

"What a ride it is. This story is made of awesome moments." —Casca, Seattle's Angels

"[A]stounding on so many levels. … If there’s one story from this round you have to pick, make it this one." —Corejo, Seattle's Angels

"Absolutely beautifully done. It fits the style and feel of the books to a perfect T." —Themaskedferret

Flash Sentry knows their relationship was never meant to last. He's a human guy; she's an immortal alicorn princess from Equestria. No matter how hard they try to make things work, he knows that sooner or later life will creep up behind them and something will finally give—be it him, or her, or them both.

So what's the point in trying when they've always been fated to part?

Winner of the EQG Spring Fling Contest. Reviewed by Loganberry. Cover sketch by me!

Cherry Jubilee’s lived in Dodge Junction her whole life. She knows the ropes—she’s tied them twenty times over.

Somepony comes into the shop with pretty makeup running all down her face. It's no hard decision of what to do next.

Written for the New Blood Contest, where it tied for third place. Uses the bonus "an unusual matchup."

Review by Loganberry. Review by PaulAsaran.

Lightning Dust wants to start her own stunt team, but finding a pony able to make flight suits to her standards has been difficult. After many dead ends, she is prepared to risk Rarity For You in Manehattan. There she'll find not only what she's looking for, but the pony she never knew she needed.

A little slice-of-life that popped into my head and wouldn't go away. Friendshipping with a hint of romance.

My thanks to the immensely helpful ChaseIsOnTheCase and Ghost Mike for prereading.

Cover art by xkappax, used with permission.

Princess Celestia has inspired many writers, artists and poets over her centuries as both ruler and Princess of the Sun. Now she invites one pony to do a special task for her.

A tale of poetry, pornography, puns, printing presses and pretty pony princesses.

Audiobook by Illya Leonov, ft Luna Farrowe and Shadow of Cygnus

Cover image by Linnpuzzle
Edited by Solstice Shimmer and BaeroRemedy.
Special thanks to Dr Bethan Tovey for help with the Old English.

“How is it that gems like these are always hidden so deep? I love your poetry, can't get enough of it.”

— SillyMare

“This is just really stellar, I hope everyone checks it out.”

— PresentPerfect

“A concept which in the hands of just about anyone would have become empty prurience is instead warm and brilliant and funny and just lovely.”

— GhostOfHeraclitus

Rainbow Dash was beautiful, the most beautiful pony to be born in a century — and so her fate was sealed. Beauty must be sacrificed, and so Rainbow Dash must die.

Winner of the 2023 EFNW Iron Author Contest. I think I beat out about 40 other writers, and it was hugely exciting to win. Hope you enjoy the read!

Prompts were: vibrant vestigial, vexing volcano, verdant vegetable. Pretty insane for prompts, but Xepher had to pronounce all the Aztec words in my story so I think we're even.

Having a regular menu and deliveries of frozen, pre-diced vegetables once a week is boring. Going to the farmer's market every day after work and finding discounted food that will be otherwise thrown away, and then making a delicious dish out of it? That's a challenge that Parsnip can get behind.

There's no menu, and she sells out every day.

Inspired by this (YouTube link).
Pre-read by EileenSaysHi and AlwaysDressesInStyle

Featured on EquestriaDaily!