Rainbow Dash knows that everypony wants her, wants to be her, and then wants her while being her. It was the price you had to pay for being so totally badass.

She knows that nopony - stallion, mare, eternal princess - can resist the call of the alpha. And now, as she knew was inevitable, her friends are beginning to show the signs.

Well, if they want her to take them around the world? Oh, she could do that.

But they must first submit...to The Dash.

It's been eighty-nine days since the Day of Darkness, and Twilight Sparkle is still on her own. Eighty-nine days since she talked to anyone other than herself. Regardless of how lonely she feels, she prefers the company of herself to the vicious "lurkers", as she calls them, roaming around outside of her library. Whatever friendly, loving creatures they were before the Day of Darkness, something changed them. Something created these insane creatures, and nothing, not even Twilight, can stop them. All Twilight can do is live — live to fight another day.

Sometimes, you really can go out into the desert and find yourself with the help of a bag of mushrooms and some ponies. Sometimes, you're better off not knowing.

Recommended by Seattle's Angels, The Royal Guard, Titanium Dragon, & Paul Asaran. Includes drug use and cussing.

To Twilight Sparkle and Princess Celestia, it is a simple surprise visit to Canterlot. To the ponies of the Equestrian Civil Service, it is twenty-four hours of chaos, politics, weaponized dessert, politics, underhooved manipulation of media, politics, and things batrachian and tentacular. Who said bureaucracy isn't exciting?

I have something I want to tell you.

It's a very simple thing. A short little phrase.

I wonder if it still matters, though, in a world like this.

It matters to me, but I'd like to know if it'll matter to you.

Audio Reading by journcy!
Featured on EqD! - 10/09/2012
Inspired by the image "Twilight's Library" by SpyroConspirator. Cover used with the artist's permission.
Also featured on the Pony Fiction Vault! - 11/03/2012
Spotlit by The Royal Guard! - 02/04/2014

Monster attacks. Crime. Illegal hallucinogens made from electric fruit.

They say things didn't use to be like this. They say things were different, before Luna came back 60 years ago, but Detective Hard "Hardy" Boiled of the Detrot Police Department has never known any world other than that demarcated by the seedy streets of his beloved decaying metropolis; a world in which the coroners sing and dance, surveillance bugs have personality disorders, and the Chief of Police is a scarier entity than most of the eldritch things the city attracts.

The grey unicorn who turned up dead outside the posh High Step Hotel seemed like just another case, but her missing horn is the pointy tip of a very large and nasty iceberg. It's up to Hardy and his friends - a rejected monster hunter, a psychic cab driver, and an underground antiques heir - to find out what’s going on in an investigation that promises to stick more than a cupcake into the very eye of Detrot.

Especially if Hardy has anything to say about it.

By Popular Demand, there is now a Patreon

Additional editing by coandco Sig_Awesome, Hinds, Clint, and Raccoon!
Featured on EQD - 5 Stars!
Cover art by MisterMech (http://mistermech.deviantart.com/)
Now with TVTropes page here!

A letter from Celestia interrupts one of Pinkie's parties with disturbing news. Now friendships will be pushed to the limit as Twilight struggles to uncover which of her friends is not who, or even what, she appears to be.

(While not a romance, this does contain a shipped pair)

in Russian

The mane six take shelter in a place that is, for now, safe from a disaster occurring outside.

This gruesome tale of violence and death is not recommended for colts, fillies, or the faint of heart.

Lyra loves Bon-Bon very, very much.

Enough, in fact, to overlook the cream-coloured, beautiful-voiced, wondrous-smelling mare's raging, overwhelming, caricatural homophobia.

This would be the state of the union; Pinkie Pie, however, being as she is, thinks all this 'unrequited love' nonsense is nonsense for silly fillies and dusty old books, and as such decides to intervene.

Background PinkieDash.

omaigawd I got put on eqd

now with a reading