All her life, Professor Lyra Heartstrings has passionately sought scientific proof for the existence of "human" beings, a technologically-advanced race of sentient creatures who theoretically ruled the world in a time before ponies. But now that Lyra stands upon the brink of Equestria's most important anthropological discovery, she's haunted with the gnawing thought that not all projects that begin should necessarily be finished.

(This is an entry into Obselescence's The More Most Dangerous Game Contest, with the Prompt Being a Re-Interpretation of JasonTheHuman's classic fanfic, Anthropology.)

The earth melts. The skies darken. Celestia has tired of being the nice princess, and the shadow of the sun has overtaken her.

To Prince Blueblood's immense regret, he can't leave this one to Sparkle and company.

Rated Teen for mild cursing and alcohol references. Honorable Mention in the 2023 Everfree Northwest Iron Author competition. Prompts were: Vexing Volcanism/Verdant Vegetable/Vibrant Vestigial

Original art by Adam Paquette.

This story is a sequel to Best Hell Ever

Once upon a time, Twilight went to hell. It wasn’t that bad. It was pretty great, actually. It had a library! A big one. Like, bigger-than-the-universe big. But then Twilight went and got herself kicked out of hell, and now she’s depressed.

There’s only one logical solution: with Starlight’s reluctant help, Twilight is going to break into hell and invade its library. Oh, it’ll be tricky — trying to find one specific location in an infinite dimension tends to be a bit hard — but the infinite knowledge it’ll provide is too good to pass up. Twilight will find that library if it kills her (which, since this is hell, isn’t the worst thing ever in the grand scheme of things).

There is absolutely no way this can possibly go wrong.

Pinkie Pie learns a new word that starts with 'F' and ends with 'K'. No, it's not firetruck.

How will she use this new word? Let's find out.

"Like two peas in a pod we did everything together!" sang Twilight in the season finale. But what if she was letting on more than everyone else knew? What if Twilight really was a pea?

"Suppose I killed them all?"

All Twilight had to do was finish Starswirl the Bearded's final spell. She didn't have to become undead, seal her soul in the Elements of Harmony, or enlist her friends in an effort to fix everything... but you have to play the hand you're dealt.

Even if it's rotting off.

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Big ups to Themaskedferret for all her support on this story.

Twilight has a problem on her hooves. An hour before Celestia was supposed to come to Ponyville for the Summer Sun Celebration, she's accidentally gone and killed everyone dead. As in, "dead as a doornail" dead. Now she's got to fix it before Celestia shows up and finds out.

Or, at the very least, make sure that Celestia doesn't know that they're dead.

Blame Blueshift for this.
Now with a sequel!
Now with a reading, graciously provided by Skijarama!

How would a being like Discord want to be remembered after he's gone? Well, if you're curious, he did actually write a will. To the surprise of nobody, its contents are bizarre and mildly disturbing.

Part of the Borderworld.

Now with audio readings by NDLMongoose and MelancholyIguana.

It's an ordinary day in Ponyville, until Applejack says Twilight is purple. She should have known better.

Prereader: CoffeeBean

Para español: Aquí