• Published 19th Apr 2013
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MLP Time Loops - Saphroneth



Twilight Sparkle has been here before. In fact, she's been here so often she's thoroughly bored. Time Loop stories for Equestria.

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Loops 2

2-1


Twilight teleported into Ponyville. “Right, let’s see…”

Pinkie bounced over. “Hiya again Twilight! I’ll go get the others!”

“Thanks Pinkie!” she shouted, after the receding earth pony. “You alright, Spike?”

“Yeah…” Spike muttered. “But who was she?”

Twilight shrugged. “I met her before, we stayed in touch.” Technically true… “Come on, let’s go over to that library we were assigned.”


“What’s the plan for this loop?” Applejack asked.

“Nothing much.” Twilight shrugged. “No big plan, anyway. As for the Summer Sun celebration, I think it might be Pinkie’s turn.”

“Yay!” Pinkie started drawing a plan. “I think that if Rarity helps set it up it won’t make anyone suspicious… and I can order a big shipment from Canterlot… you’ve got some spare money, right Twilight?”

“Yep.” Twilight nodded. “Dash, you’re the fastest. Mind helping Pinkie with getting that delivered?”

Dash grinned. “Not at all!”

“Right. Oh, what is your plan?”

“Well, you know how Nightmare Night is all about appeasing Nightmare Moon with sweets?” Pinkie’s smile got wider. “I thought about thirty tonnes rigged up to pour on her when I pull the rope should work!”


“…last forever!”

Pinkie pulled the rope. The avalanche of sweet things crashed down on Nightmare Moon - and stopped, before flying sideways to cover Pinkie in confectionary.

The other five Loopers started. “Pinkie!”

“Did you think you could stop a goddess so easily?” Nightmare Moon laughed, then dissolved into sparkles of starry night which shot out the door. There was a crash.

“Help!” Roseluck shouted from outside. “That horrible nightmare thing stole the library!”

Twilight blinked. “Did Nightmare Moon just steal my house?”

“Looks like.” Applejack said. “Come on, let’s dig Pinkie out before she tries t’ eat her way out.”


Pinkie had swirls around her eyes when they got her out. “Owie… that must have been some hard candy…”

“What do we do?” Fluttershy asked, as Pinkie shook it off and started popping caramel chocolates into her mouth. “That’s not normal, is it?”

“No, it’s not. We’d better hurry and find her before things get worse.” Twilight frowned. “How can the rest of you do with manifesting your elements?”

“Ah’m afraid ah need to have touched it first.” Applejack said. “Remember? We normally go collect them from the castle if we plan on blasting Nightmare Moon.”

“Right. I’ll go get them now, just in case.” Twilight vanished.

After about a minute, Rarity raised a hoof. “Shouldn’t she be back by now?”

Dash focused on the secondary powers of her element. “She’s not harmed, I can tell that much. But she’s just not come back.”


“What the hay?” Rarity said, shocked, pausing as she exited through the large building’s door. “What has happened to my boutique?”

The others looked it over. There didn’t appear to be any change – certainly nothing that would promote such a strong response from the elegant mare.

“Look at it! Just look! Fluttershy, you must see!”

“Er…” Fluttershy trotted closer, squinting. “That dress in the window has… oh, my. That’s terrible.”

“What’s terrible?” Dash asked. “It can’t be that bad, can it?”

“It’s been re-stitched half an inch off the join line!” Rarity said, her eyes wide. “And the one on the left side has been dyed four shades too dark!” She burst into motion, galloping into the building.

A high scream came from inside. “Nooo! They’ve all been ruined! What cruel pony would pair teal with chartreuse?

The others exchanged looks.

“Ah’m startin’ to suspect somethin’s up this loop…” Applejack muttered.


Fluttershy sadly read the sign placed in front of her house. Dash peered over her shoulder. “What? ‘I have your animals, if you want them back pay the ransom of twelve hundred bits’? What kind of low-down, no good coward would do this?”

“Ah thought it was Nightmare Moon.” Applejack pointed out. “What with her bein’ two steps ahead of us this loop an’ all.”

Rarity was still mourning her dresses.

Applejack took an uneasy look at Pinkie, who seemed to be on a sugar rush. Well, it could just be Pinkie being Pinkie, but her eyes looked just a little dilated…

No, that had to be the sugar. Even Pinkie didn’t normally emit a faint musical hum.


Big Mac caught up with them as they entered the Everfree proper. “Sis! Ah’ve been lookin’ all over for you. The trees…”

“What?” Applejack asked. “Nothin’ bad happened, ah hope?”

“That’s just it.” Big Mac shrugged. “They’re… lemons.”

“Wait, what?” Dash said. “But you’re the Apple clan. Apples. Right? How could you miss planting lemons?”

“They weren’t lemons yesterday.” Both siblings chorused.

“How does that even make sense?” Dash was starting to feel like the voice of reason. It didn’t feel comfortable.

“That’s just it, RD.” Applejack said. “It don’t.”


Halfway to the Castle of the Royal Pony Sisters, there was an explosion overhead. All five ponies’ heads snapped back, but all they saw was a series of expanding black rings.

“I don’t like this…” Fluttershy said, looking around nervously.

“Ooh!” Pinkie said. “A letter came down! Hey, Dash, it’s for you!”

The indicated pegasus took it. It was thick paper, with an official-looking seal on the front.

Holding it gingerly away from her, she opened it. When it failed to explode, she looked more properly.

Dear Rainbow Dash

We would like to inform you that you are our first choice for the position of Shadowbolt Captain, from over a hundred applicants.

The position carries a very competitive salary, and all our members have expressed interest in working with you.

Dash laughed, pausing in her reading of the letter. “Hah! Like that’ll get me. We did this before!”

“Well?” Pinkie said. “What does the rest of it say?”

“Huh? There’s more?” Pinkie pointed. “Oh. Er…”

If you are unable to give this offer your time, we will of course have no hard feelings. In this case, the number two option for this position will be used, and hence the role will go to-

“Lightning Dust?” Dash shouted. “That no-good two-bit careless… grah! Well, she’s not going to beat me this time!” She bunched up her legs to launch into the air, and got tackled by four ponies at once.

“Stay good, Dashie!” Pinkie shouted.

“It’s just another of Nightmare Moon’s tricks.” Rarity pointed out.

“Um… I think it would be a bad idea.”

“All right, all right. Sorry, okay?” One by one, her friends got off her. “Sorry. It just caught me by surprise, alright?”


Twilight slowly returned to consciousness. She’d materialized in the room with the Elements, like normal, and then…

Oh. She’d been hit on the head by a book. Judging by the impact, it was probably Edgar the Griffin’s Decline and Fall of the Romane Empire. The omnibus edition.

She looked around. Still the castle of the royal pony sisters. In fact, this was quite near the main entrance.

And there were voices coming from said entrance. The others were nearly here? How long had she been out?

Even as she tried to work out what else was wrong, they burst through the door.

“Nightmare Moon!” Dash shouted. “You better give Twilight back!”

Twilight tried to turn, to see where Nightmare Moon was-

“Hey!” Pinkie shouted. “Don’t pretend we’re not here!”

Then Twilight realized what had been so off when she woke up.

She’d been meticulously painted black and dark purple, her mane styled, her cutie mark painted over… she’d been dressed in armour which looked awfully familiar… there were fake black wings strapped to her, and she was wearing contacts.

“Girls, wait!” she said, urgently. “I’m not Nightmare Moon!”

“That voice trick isn’t going to fool us!” Dash said.

Applejack nodded. “RD? On three.”

Then somepony started laughing themselves sick. With a crash, a figure fell through a hole in the ceiling and slammed into the floor, still shaking with mirth.

Twilight regained enough presence of mind to use some of the spells Rarity had taught her and recolor her coat to normal, then teleported out of the armour and summoned her Element of Magic.

Everyone recognized the pony heaving with laughter over in the corner at once.

Luna?

“Ahh haa haa, hee hee, oh, my sides…” Luna finally contained her mirth enough to speak, and rolled onto her front before standing up. “Yes, it’s me... I assume there’s some kind of time travel going on?”

Twilight nodded. “Time loops. We’ve all done a good few hundred by now.”

“Well… ah, I needed that.” Another giggle escaped. “I pranked you all, for once! Ah, that was better than anything Celly’s ever done!” Luna shook her head, and tried to stay on topic. “Right. So – pfft… so, you all seem to have been doing this for a while.”

Pinkie nodded enthusiastically. Twilight elaborated. “I’ve got no clue exactly how it happens, but it seems like I loop the most often and the rest of us are on-and-off. Somepony like you might be only around very rarely.”

“We kin only hope.” Applejack said sarcastically. “Do y’all have any idea what I’m going to do with eight hundred lemon trees? Cuz I don’t.”


2.2


Twilight Awoke in the library as usual. She felt for her magic, and found… not quite nothing, but a very different sensation to normal.

“What’s…”

Her voice trailed off as she realized something else was missing. More specifically, Spike was – normally, she Awoke with him in the same room of the library.

Then the doors slammed open in a flash of pink magic. “Hiya Twilight! You’ll never guess what Celly told us to do!”

At that point, the Loop memories returned. Ah, that’s right. She was Twilight Sparkle, an earth pony whose theoretical knowledge of magic was good enough to get her a scholarship into the Academy anyway. And her best friend was Pinkie Pie, the craziest unicorn in Canterlot.

I’m going to need a freaking drink before this Loop is over…


Twilight felt an eye twitch coming on.

This wasn’t as crazy as the “King Discord” loop, but it was starting to get close. Fluttershy was an earth pony (which made a fair amount of sense), Rainbow Dash was a unicorn with an obsession with speed and weather spells, and Applejack and Rarity were pegasi.

Everyone’s special talent was still the same, though. It had made for a thoroughly strange loop so far, especially when Dash managed to break the sound barrier in a sprint…

The reason for the eye twitch was just because Pinkie had access to teleport magic. It would go away once she managed to repress the memory again.


It was nice being an earth pony in one way, actually. She could finally properly study how much stronger and tougher she was now than when she was a unicorn. Of course, she’d tried examining the same thing when she was Princess Twilight, but alicorns had much stronger versions of all three kinds of pony magic.

Mind you, the idea that earth ponies were stronger and faster than unicorns had had to compete with Rainbow Dash this Loop, and given up.

Hmm, let’s see… what happened next first time around…

“Hey, Twilight, can you come over to the library pleeease?” Pinkie asked, materializing in a flash.

“Sure, Pinkie!” For a fraction of a second, Twilight tried to teleport, then felt like facehoofing. You’re an Earth Pony this loop, Twilight! “What for?” she asked, to cover her mistake.

“Oh, I found a spell under ‘A’ in some old book, and it says it needs the Elements of Harmony to help with it! It’ll be super-duper-nice!”

Ah, horsefeathers. This won’t end well.


Discord applauded. “I never thought of making the moon into a disco ball! I have to say, Celly, I do approve of your choice of new princess.”

“Shut up.” Celestia said, sitting down next to him. “I forgot how hyperactive she gets, okay?”

Overhead, Princess Pinkie Pie shot past trailing a rainbow and making cat noises.


2.3

With a flash, Twilight materialized in Canterlot Castle right next to her brother. “Hi, B.B.B.F.F! What’s this I hear about a wedding?”

Shining Armor flinched back. “Gah! Who the hell… Twily?”

“That’s right!” Twilight replied, grinning. “What’s wrong?”

“Your… your mane and coat…” Shining pointed. “You’ve dyed them bright pink.”

“Yep! My friends and I formed a band, and Pinkie’s in charge, and she asked us to all dye our manes and coats! Sorry, I forgot to tell you about it. My bad, huh?”

The other five Elements came in, having been dropped off outside by Twilight. Every last one of them was blazing fluorescent pink everywhere except for their tails.

“But… but… what are our parents going to think?”

Twilight shrugged. “I’m sure it’ll be great fun! Hey, Pinks, what are we going to start with?”

Pinkie Pie pulled sheet music out of her mane. “Weee-ll, we have a choice between The Song That Never Ends or Discordian Rapshody.

Applejack frowned. "Why not Nightmare Moon's Revenge, Pinkie? Twilight wrote that one."

"Yeah, sounds great!"

Shining Armor collapsed with a thud, finally overcome with shock.

Twilight hoofbumped the others. "Nice work, girls! That'll teach him to not let me know he's getting married."


2.4


Twilight stumbled, almost falling, and shivered. “That was not fun!”

Spike watched, dumbfounded, as she teleported out of Canterlot library.


Six bright flashes of light later, the other five Elements found themselves inside the library’s upper bedroom.

“Girls…” Twilight tripped over her words. “Just… hold me.”

Mutely, she spread her forelegs, and the others hugged her.

“What’s wrong, Twi?” Dash asked. “Bad Loop?”

“Basically.” Twilight sighed, and shook herself. “Okay. So, I ended up there after, you know… trying to see if the Element of Laughter worked for Discord.”

Everyone contemplated that silently.

“Where’d you end up, Transformers again?”

“Applejack!” Fluttershy rebuked, then flinched. “Oops. Sorry for raising my voice.”

“It’s fine,” everyone else chorused.

“No, it wasn’t Transformers. Okay, I think I’m fine now, girls.”

One by one, Applejack, Rarity, Dash and Fluttershy got off Twilight. Pinkie stayed hugging her.

“Er, Pinkie… you as well, please.”

“Nope!” Pinkie said. “You’ll need it again in a minute!”

Twilight shrugged. “Whatever makes you happy. Anyway, I ended up in this kind of… bizarre version of Ponyville. Almost nobody actually did anything.”

“Liiiike?”

“Well, you know how Cheerilee works as a school teacher?” The others nodded. “Yeah. There, she was a storyteller.”

Applejack frowned. “So what was her job, then?”

“She didn’t have one. Nor did Pinkie – she just ran around giving everyone parties.”

“Ooh!” Pinkie said. “I like the sound of that place!”

Twilight shook her head, sending Pinkie’s mane flying. “No, you wouldn’t. You didn’t have any of your Laughter powers – you just occasionally used balloons to fly around.”

“Whaaaat? This place made me boring?”

“Yeah.” Twilight pointed at Rarity. “I only saw you and Dash there, apart from Pinkie. You were some kind of stuck up princess.”

“I was a Princess?” Rarity wobbled slightly, and materialized her couch just in case. “Twilight, I don’t see how you could possibly dislike the place!”

“No, small-p. You were an heir, about the age of the Crusaders or less, and there wasn’t a queen that I saw.”

“Oh.” That sounded much less inviting to the white unicorn. “That’s no good.”

“It just… nothing happened.”

“What about me?” Dash said. “Please tell me I was awesome, at least!”

Twilight gave her a look. “Dash, when I tell you this, I want you to remember the time that you replaced every book in my library with ones that were slightly out of print, and made me think I needed glasses.”

“…yeah?”

Twilight’s voice took on a syrupy sweet quality. “Rainbow Dash always dresses in style.”

Dash twitched, and fell over in a faint onto Rarity’s convenient couch.


2.5

“Hey, uh… Miss Twilight?”

Twilight looked up. It had been a fairly pleasant early Loop this time. None of the others were Awake, and she’d handled Nightmare Moon the normal way for once.

Surprisingly, though, in front of her were Applebloom, Sweetie Belle and Scotaloo.

That can’t be right… it isn’t until Twist’s cute-caneara that they normally meet properly…

“What is it, you three? Uh… I recognize you, you’re Applejack’s sister.”

“Yep!” Applebloom said proudly. “This is Sweetie Belle, Rarity’s sister, and this is Scootaloo. And we’re…”

Twilight braced herself for the shout.

“…well, we don’t know what’s happened. We’re in the past, somehow. Or, we’re in the present now, but we were in the future! But it wasn’t the future back then, and…”

Raising a hoof, Twilight headed off Applebloom’s babbling explanation. “Okay, I understand. Now, I don’t know exactly why this has happened to you, but I know what has happened.”

“Really?” Scootaloo said. “You’re so smart, pr-uh, I mean, Miss Twilight!”

Twilight grinned, summoned the Element of Magic, and momentarily flashed into alicornhood before undoing the spell again. “I’ve come back in time too. And this isn’t the first time. Basically, I keep looping back to the first day I came to Ponyville, and so do the other Elements of Harmony – sometimes. I don’t know how often you three will or if you’ll do it alone.”

The Crusaders absorbed that information.

“Miss Twilight?” Sweetie Belle said.

“Just call me Twilight, please.”

“Alright. Uh… Twilight, you said you’d come back more than once?”

“I have.” Twilight confirmed.

“Then… can you tell us what our cutie marks are?”

Twilight chuckled. “It doesn’t work like that. Even if you think you know what your cutie mark is going to be, you can end up with something completely different.”

“Awww…” the crusaders chorused.

“Besides, you’ve each had at least three different ones that I’ve seen.”

Now they were just dumbfounded.

“Uhhh… how does that work?” Applebloom asked.

“Okay.” Twilight conjured a blackboard. “Do you want the long version, or the short one?”

“Short!” Scootaloo and Applebloom said hastily. Sweetie nodded.


“That wasn’t short…” Sweetie moaned. “That took half an hour!”

“Of course it was!” Twilight said indignantly. “This is one of my thesis projects!”

“Right… hey, I got a great idea!”

Scootaloo whispered to the other two, who exchanged nods with her. “Cutie Mark Crusader timeline fixers go!”

Twilight watched them leave at a run. “This won’t end well. I don’t know where it’s going, but it won’t end well.”


From a distance, Twilight watched as the changeling army overran Canterlot.

“I was right, it didn’t.”

“Sorry, Twilight.” Applebloom said morosely.

“How did you even do this?”

“Well, we wanted to get revenge on that mean Changeling Queen!” Scootaloo began. “But when we did our ‘this is why we’re beating you up’ speech, she just… took notes.”

Twilight shook her head. “I think you girls still have a lot to learn about how everything has a result when you mess with time travel.”

“Yeah, we worked that out.” Scootaloo kicked a pebble. “What now?”

At that point, the changeling army captured Rarity, and Spike went off.

This is planning ahead, girls.” Twilight said smugly, as Spikezilla punched Chrysalis right out of the city. “Take notes.”


2.6

“Hey, Pinkie?” Twilight mused, glancing over at the recently Awakened pink party pony.

“Yeah, Twilight?” said pony replied, bouncing in place.

“You know Nightmare Moon?” Twilight nodded at Luna’s dark side, currently mid speech.

“Of course!”

“Well, it just struck me that she’s not had a proper birthday party celebration since she got stuck on the moon… a thousand years ago.”

Twilight handed Pinkie a key. “Here. I put supplies in the basement of the library. Go nuts.”

A pink blur shot past her out the door, then back in again and landed on Nightmare Moon in a shower of pastries.

“It’s your first belated birthday party!”

Nightmare kicked out with her legs, missing Pinkie entirely. “Get OFF me, you worthless nag!”

“Someone’s cranky! Must be party withdrawal!” Pinkie chuckled. “Hey, Twilight, go grab my party howitzer!”

Twilight nodded. “On it.”

“Applejack, I need more apple flavoured pies, stat! And balloons, I must have balloons! And someone bring me sprinkles!

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy exchanged looks.

“Well, they’re excited.” Dash eventually said, as Pinkie hog-tied Nightmare Moon with a length of tinsel and plonked her down in front of a cake that looked more like a bonfire.

“Yeah.” Fluttershy replied.


Ten minutes later, Rarity polished off the last of the cake after being assured that one slice wouldn’t ruin her figure.

“While that was an… irritating diversion,” Nightmare Moon simmered, “Now you have released me, I will continue. The Night Will-”

“Fire, Twilight!”

The party howitzer round detonated, covering everything with frosting half an inch thick and landing Nightmare Moon up against the wall again.

“Now it’s time for your second belated birthday party!”

There was another cake. There were more presents. There was a fresh supply of balloons.

Nightmare Moon shook her head. “This is not how I envisaged my triumphant return.”


“Nine hundred and ninety nine…” Pinkie said chirpily. “Time for the last one!”

She looked around. Sadly, not many ponies were really in the spirit of a birthday party any more, being mostly passed out in a satiated haze.

And the country was kinda-sorta-running out of sugar.

“Why?” Nightmare Moon croaked. “Why do you torment me like this?”

“Torment? Silly, you don’t understand parties at all! They’re for fun! And they show that other ponies want to have fun with you!”

“Besides.” Twilight said, delicately eating a scone. “If she hadn’t gotten it all out of her system now, you’d be being ambushed at random times for the next decade. Anyway, I thought you wanted to be appreciated.”

“I have a new respect for the problems my sister faced.” Nightmare Moon deadpanned. “Now, can I please go? I need to… go and work off some of this sugar.”

“One more candy apple and a smile…” Pinkie coaxed. “And off you go.”

“…fine.” Nightmare Moon took the candy apple, and forced a grin. Pinkie clapped.

“There you go! Don’t you feel better?”

“A bit.” Nightmare Moon allowed.

“Yay! Mission successful!”

“And it only took y’all most of mah apples.” Applejack said. “Along with makin’ the Cakes the richest family in Equestria.”


2.7

Nightmare Moon strode back and forth upon the surface of her celestial home. Not long now…

“Hi!”

She turned, eyes flashing, and saw an eager looking young unicorn… standing on the moon.

“How are you alive?”

“Oh, that. Well, I guessed that lunar survival probably involved pressurized air in a bubble around the pony, so I adapted a bubble-head charm. Anyway,” the unicorn held out a sheaf of papers. “You hiring?”

Confused, Nightmare Moon took the paper and began reading. “Twilight Sparkle… Adept class mage – really? You look very young for it.”

“I can do the test, just like any other Adept.” Twilight said. “Anyway..?”

Nightmare Moon kept reading. “So, you’re my sister’s personal student?”

“Yeah, but I’m trying to keep my options open. I think a bit of time rounding out my knowledge of black magic would help.”

“Indeed…” Nightmare Moon looked sideways at Twilight. "I think I could use somepony like you."


The Ruler of the Night, Empress of Equestria, scowled out of her window.

“It’s just not the same.”

Twilight shrugged. “Well, it’s letting ponies grow plants, and it still IS night.”

“Yes, but my moon is supposed to be a pale orb of light, shimmering in the night sky. Not a giant mirror.”

“Can’t blame me for getting rid of the inefficiencies in the system.”

Two Night Guards alighted on the balcony. “Your darkness, there is a meeting of parliament in ten minutes.”

And you introduced this as well.” Nightmare groused. “I don’t see why we have to listen to all those idiotic minor nobles and sleazy politicians.”

“That’s easy.” Twilight answered. “This way, everyone’s too busy trying to work out how to exploit the system to be able to find the Elements of Harmony.”


Celestia kicked at the surface of the sun, which flared up in a burst of plasma.

“Nopony knows the trouble I’ve seen, nopony knows my sorrows…”


2.8


“These are my three sons. Spyro, age nineteen; Toothless, age seventeen; and Spike, age sixteen. Pick which one you want to be your fiancé.”

Rarity groaned. “This is not going to be a fun loop…”

“You’re telling me?” Twilight said, from the door. “I keep turning into a panda!”


2.9


The last thing Twilight remembered was a flash of multicoloured light, then-

“What were we doing?” she mumbled, as she forced her eyes open. “Something about giving the Crusaders the Elements of Harmony?”

“Yep.” Applejack said from next to her. “And ah think we bucked the universe up.”

Twilight looked around the furnished train compartment. “Oh. Hogwarts again. But why are we still ponies this time?”

“Beats me.” Applejack shrugged. “Let’s go see if the others ended up in a different compartment of the train.”


“So, this isn’t a fused loop.” Twilight mused, as she watched everyone cheer Dash going into Gryffindor. “Looks like we’re replacing people. Dash for Harry seems vaguely appropriate – you know, lightning bolts – but nobody seems to be really noticing that we’re ponies.”

“Is that unusual?” Fluttershy asked.

“Fairly. They were really confused when I Looped into the Trek universe.”


“There, there…” Fluttershy said, scratching the enormous reptile under the chin. “You didn’t mean to hurt anyone, did you? It was that nasty Mister Riddle who made you do it, wasn’t it?”

The Basilisk crooned, thumping the floor with its enormous tail.

Pinkie snatched up the diary. “Dibs! Ooh, this’ll be nice. My very own book friend I can write in and it can talk to me and I can tell it about parties and…”

The Diary Horcrux twitched, then self destructed.


“The first challenge is to, ah… retrieve the golden egg.”

Twilight and Dash exchanged glances.

“Right, so you first, Miss Rainbow Dash, of, ah…”

“The Wonderbolt Academy!”

“Oh, sorry. I should have remembered.”

As Dash drew out a Ukranian Ironbelly, Twilight rolled her eyes. The Twiwizard Tournament had got seriously broken this Loop – it had entered her as a student in Celestia’s Academy and Dash as part of the Wonderbolt Academy.


Twilight teleported to the egg, picked it up telekinetically, and teleported back. “Right, that was easy.”

As she trotted over to the stands, Dash got her own at five hundred miles per hour.


“Oh, come on!” Dash shouted. “We have to swim? Wings don’t go well with water!”

Twilight shrugged. “Come on. Unless you want to forfeit, and I’ll get both Fluttershy and Rarity?”

“Why did they choose those two, anyway?” Dash muttered.

“Same race, I think. Anyway, there is another option.”

“If it means I don’t have to lose, I’ll take it!”

“Right.” Twilight’s horn flashed.


“Shoo ba doo.”

“Language!” Twilight said. “Right, that spell should wear off in another ten minutes. And at least you got third place!”

“Bloop.” Rainbow flipped her seapony's fins, and gave Twilight a dirty look.


“Rainbow Dash, go!”

Dash took off like a rocket, flew over the maze and grabbed the trophy. There was a surge of motion, and she was in a graveyard.

Two seconds later Twilight teleported in next to her. “Hi, Rainbow. Yeah, this is Little Hangleton alright. Hang on a sec, I’ll get the others.”

Twilight flashed away again.

A high, cold voice shouted something, and Dash collapsed.


She came around a minute later, tied to a gravestone.

“Do you have any idea how long I’ve waited for this, Rainbow Dash? Your mother-”

Twilight, Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy and Pinkie materialized next to her, and Twilight severed the ropes holding Dash in place. “Here, catch.”

Rainbow grabbed the flying necklace out of the air and slipped it on. “Right, let’s do this!”

“Wait, what are those?” Voldemort asked, before he and his lackey Crouch got a faceful of harmony.


“Five… six…” Twilight ticked off a list. “Last one left’s the Ring.”

“Right.” Dash frowned. “Aren’t I supposed to be one?”

“Not after using the Elements. I blasted it with a side beam – it didn’t stand a chance.”

“Cool.”

“Right. Hey, Fluttershy! I’m going to need Chompy’s help!” Twilight called.

Fluttershy nodded. “All right. Here, boy! Come on!”

The Basilisk (wearing a sleeping blindfold) slithered across the Chamber floor and nuzzled Fluttershy, before vanishing with her and Twilight in a flash of light.


“There we go.” Twilight said, carefully lifting the ring out of a box. “Wow, that is pretty impressive…”

“Twilight?” Fluttershy said. “Stop looking at the ring like that, it’s… er… worrying.”

Chompy rolled his blindfolded eyes, then spat a glob of venom at the hovering ring. It hissed, and exploded.

Twilight shook her head. “Ergh. Sorry, I wasn’t ready for it. The others were a lot easier. Anyway, it’s almost the start of year five now, so we finished just in time.”

“Yay.” Fluttershy cheered.


2.10 (Finagle007 from SpaceBattles)


"Congratulations upon your graduation. Team One will be... Applejack, Fluttershy, and Rarity, jonin sensei Luna." Iruka proudly announced, with a wide smile on his face.

"Yay," Fluttershy whispered, while Applejack and Rarity's faces lit up like the sun.

"Team Two..." Iruka continued, "Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Twilight Sparkle, jonin sensei Celestia – what the-!"

With an almighty crash, a terrified and slightly burned Jiraiya came hurtling through the window, pursued by a furious (and damp) Celestia and Luna.

"HOW DAREST THOU SPY UPON US WHILST WE RELAX IN THE HOT SPRINGS, VILE PERVERT!" Luna boomed, Royal Canterlot Voice in full effect.

Jiraiya hopped back onto his feet and started to dance. "I'm no pervert, I'm a super - YOW! Watch where you point that thing!"

"Oh, I am," snarled Celestia, her horn glowing brightly as she unleashed another bolt of sunfire at the (very, very doomed) perverted sage.

"This is beyond troublesome..." Shikamaru muttered. Shino nodded in agreement.

Author's Note:

Here's the second lot. Don't necessarily expect this rate to be sustained, though... and I do welcome suggestions.

And yes, that IS Nyan Princess Pinkie Pie.

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