MLP Loops 208
208.1 (Wixelt)
"Hey, um... Rarity?"
"Yes, Fluttershy. What may I do for you this fine loop?"
"Well, you see..." the butter pegasus coughed politely, "I noticed you were trying to make a dress out of live fish?"
"That is true, dear." the unicorn, currently dressed in the garb of a fisherman, albeit with her own touches here and there, nodded, glancing to the tank next to her, it being full of the fish she'd brought in for the occasion, "If you're worried, I assure you, I've taken the correct precautions to ensure it's safe and humane, and all the fish involved volunteered on a strictly temporary basis."
"Well, actually..."
"And they've all signed waivers."
"...not all of them."
"Oh? How so?" Rarity quirked a curious eyebrow.
"Angel Bunny is Awake this loop, i'm afraid." Fluttershy frowned, "And may have gotten caught in your nets by accident."
"But I haven't seen-"
"He may also be a fish in this variant."
"...Ah. Well, that..." Rarity sighed, then reached up and pushed the lid of the tank open slightly. Almost immediately, a small, stark white fish leapt from the water, clearing the dock platform and landing in the water of the lake. Surfacing, the fish stared at Rarity angrily, before disappearing beneath the surface of the water once more. The fashionista blinked several times, "Well, I suppose he has looped in as stranger things..." she shook her head, "For some reason, I was expecting a shark."
"He'd definitely have preferred that..." Fluttershy agreed.
208.2 (DrTempo; edited by Wixelt)
As was usual since the most recent baseline expansion, Twilight Sparkle was headed to Friendship University, angry at what the Flim Flam Brothers had done. Before she could leave, however, Spike had handed her the morning paper.
As she looked at it, she smirked. The newspaper had an article about the Friendship University having closed, with the picture having Applejack, Luna, Cheerilee and Celestia glaring angrily at the Flim Flam Brothers, with Chancellor Neighsay off to the side, looking humiliated. As Twilight chuckled, she realized that, this time, she had been beaten to the punch.
"I'd forgotten that Applejack said she would handle this when she got the chance. Guess Cherilee, Celestia and Luna were just as angry." Twilight shrugged. "Saves me a trip, at least."
With that, Twilight got to reading a book, able to relax now. At least that was one less problem to deal with this Loop.
208.3 (Wixelt)
"This is less than ideal."
"Aw, c'mon, Twi. It could be w-"
"Don't." Twilight snapped, before sighing, "Just... don't say it."
"Actually, yep. Good call there." Pinkie giggled nervously, glancing around at their hay-filled surroundings, "This is super boring, though. Like," she snorted, "A petting zoo? Come on, Japan! Get your mojo on! Move that party thing. Have some people in big costumes dressed as us or something."
"...I just know that's going to be our next loop now. Damnit Pin-"
"Uwa! Hanasu ponī!" ("Wow! A talking pony!")
"...and that's our cue to exit." Twilight shook her head, "You got anything you want to do this loop, Pinkie?" she narrowed her eyes in thought, "Idol career? Vigilante work? Snowboarding?"
"It's snowing on Mount Fuji." the looping Chaos Goddess offered, peering into the middle distance.
"Eh, works for me." the Anchor shrugged, before grabbing her friend and teleporting out in full view of the rapidly gathering crowd, causing a gasp of surprise and awe.
208.4 (Evilhumour, katfairy, V01D, Archeo Lumiere, Wixelt, Boohoooo!, BIOS-Pherecydes) [MLP/D&DC/Kill la Kill/Pokémon (anime)/Lupin the Third/Carmen Sandiego/Nanosaur/Jurassic Park/Final Space/RWBY/40K/Supernatural/Animorphs]
The Oddest Bar Loop
(Evilhumour)
Twilight looked around Mac's Bar and saw that for once in a long time, everyone was Awake and they had a large number of their friends from other Branches in the room. A smile grew on her face as an idea that she had been thinking of for several hundred loops and she cleared her throat-
"Hey guys, I got an idea; we haven't done one of our show and tell things in a while," Vinyl called out, levitating a mug of cider with wubs. "Why don't we all share the oddest thing we nicked from a Hub loop? I once took a massive crate of vuvuzelas."
Twilight politely stewed in silence as the musician stole her idea as her friends began to call out what they had done.
(katfairy)
"I... well, I might have... liberated a hwacha from the Mythbusters before that Hub-like crashed thanks to somebody's bright idea involving giving eldritch abominations Negative Space Wedgies," Hank said, glaring at Discord. "And I ran into company while I was there."
"Trixie was merely trying to find their plans for the non-dairy creamer cannon, as somebody destroyed my blueprints," Trixie replied, raising an eyebrow at Chrysalis. "Although that is far from the oddest thing the Great And Powerful Trixie has nicked from a Hub-like. That would be one of Wilhelm Reich's original Cloudbusters, because Trixie had to know if they would work in other Loops."
(V01D)
"One time, I was a bit hungry... So I took the entire Cave of Giant Crystal" Spike said.
"How Giant?" Tiamat asked.
"The largest crystal recorded weighed 55 tons. Of Selenite."
A bit of drool leaked from each of her mouths.
(Archeo Lumiere)
Rarity went next, and it was evident she had prepared, as she was wearing a string of Jade beads and a gorgeous diamond necklace.
"While nowhere near as impressive as yours, dear Spike, and possibly against the spirit of the contest, I have a large collection of each of the most expensive necklaces in the entire Hub, and every loop I take the Hope Diamond; after properly removing its curse, of course. At the moment I'm wearing the Hutton-Mdivani and L'incomparable. As for why only the necklaces; the brooches are simply gaudy even at their price-points, the watch wouldn't fit, and the rings, aside from the same point as the watch," she looked up to her horn, where her wedding ring sat delicately at its base, "why there's no ring in the entire Multiverse more valuable than this one."
(Wixelt)
"Trixie, dear?" Chrysalis glanced over at her other half, frowning, "You've been awfully quiet since your first recount."
"Trixie does not wish to take part anymore." the showmare shook her head, slumping back in her seat.
"Really?" Gilda glanced over, "C'mon Trix, I know you've stolen more stuff in Hub loops before. Stop being a grump about it."
"You're just going to stop me if I try and talk about the other thing I really remember, given what it was an aftermath to." Trixie growled morosely.
"Stop? What are you talking abou- Oh." a spark of recognition ignited in the griffon's eyes, "Thermite?"
"Thermite." the blue unicorn nodded, "So unless you intend to allow me to tell that story finally," she took a deep breath, "I will not be taking further part today."
"...eh, a shame." Gilda shrugged, leaning back to find her drink, "But yeah, not today. Not ever."
"See?!"
"You know, I don't appreciate your continually stifling my mare-friend like this." Chrysalis grimaced at Gilda.
"Trust me, it's for the good of everyone."
"Twilight Sparkle."
Everyone went abruptly quiet, turning to look with heavy confusion (and embarrassed mumbling from the local Anchor) at a certain pink mare.
"What? I can't rescue one of my besties when some meanie government lab gets overzealous?" Pinkie shrugged, sipping on a chocolate shake.
"I..." Vinyl frowned, "I don't think that counts. You didn't pocket her."
"Don't change the rules, silly."
"I'm no-"
"She's right, y'know." Applejack offered, "Ya never said we had to have pocketed whatever it was we stole."
"...point." Vinyl sighed, ceding to the evidence, "But I'm saying it now. We'll allow that one, but only stuff you pocketed from now on, please." there was a moment's pause, "Also no more Loopers."
Several annoyed groans echoed from various parts of the room.
(Evilhumour)
"I once stole a shit ton of dresses from some fancy ass clothing line," Ryuko said, causing everyone stare at her as she held a glass to her lips. "What, I don't need to explain myself!" She snapped, a blush racing across her face.
"Ya kinda do," Applejack said, scratching the back of her head with her hoof.
"Ain't part of the rules," Ryuko snorted, looking away from a now grinning Mako.
"Well, I guess she's right," Vinyl began, rubbing her chin. "But-"
"Waterfalls," Lupin the Third said, causing everyone to focus on him now.
"Which one?" Twilight asked.
"All of them."
"What do you mean, the famous on-"
"All of them." He stated flatly with a number of Loopers trying to comprehend that and failing, with the others just drinking away the nonsense.
"I stole sunrises," Carmen bragged with a grin. "And only sunrises, there were still sunsets. But I stole sunrises." That caused an even greater number of Looper frowning and trying to work that concept out.
"I stole a mustard factory by accident," Pikachu muttered unhappily and held up a paw. "I was colour blind and took the wrong one before anyone asks."
"I hijacked a truck filled to the brim with Big Mac sauce!" Rainbow Dash said to a disgusted room with confusion on her face before she realized what she had said. "Wait, I meant that sauce from that restaura-" But before she could finish herself, the pegasus found herself tossed out of the bar and onto the grass. Groaning, Dash raised a hoof and tried to push the door open, only to find her hoof slipping off and a sign saying she was banned for the rest of the loop.
Inside the bar, Big Mac in his internalized alicorn form, tapped the rules with his magic and highlighted the rule about mentioning that sauce before he spoke; "Ah got mahself some dresses too, Ryuko."
"Ah that's so cool!" Mako shouted, placing a hand around her girlfriend's shoulder. "You two can compare dresses now and-" Ryuko silenced her with a kiss and pleading look for other people to continue with their stories.
"I once stole a bounce house," Polymnia announced, causing Konani, Blue, Echo, Delta, Charlie and Velocious to stare at her.
"I know I'm going to regret asking this," Konani said as he rubbed his head with a claw, using the other to try and grab his glass only for one of his herdmates to slap it away as they said he’d had enough tonight. "But why?"
"I dunno, I wanted one!" Polymnia said with a grin on her face that caused everyone to sigh.
(Boohoooo!)
"I don't know any of you! Can I participate anyways?" Gary Goodpseed asked.
"Sure." Vinyl shrugged.
"Radsauce! I once stole a bunch of cookies! ...Mmm, cookies..." Gary stated, drooling.
"...Excuse my friend, he has a rather unhealthy obsession with cookies." HUE sighed.
"Meh, we all have our quirks!" Pinkie smiled.
(Wixelt)
"Pie." Luna spoke up suddenly, looking over her drink, "Which is to say something beyond just robbing a confectioner's." she smiled to herself, "In a given near-Hub loop, I was able to steal and pocket, with considerable effort mind you, the very concept of pie itself."
"That..." Twilight gaped, "How in the worlds does..."
"To clarify, though I won't go into specifics," the night mare smirked, "It rendered all other beings on Earth bar myself unable to bake any manner of pie, nor speak of it in any sense." she giggled, "It may have also indirectly caused a certain sect of the mathematics community to implode, metaphorically speaking."
"That was you?!" Pinkie shrieked suddenly, mildly (though somewhat bemusedly) unimpressed, "I was in that loop!" she grumbled, face-desking the table, "Not being able to say my own name was awful, you meanie!"
"Um..." the Princess of the Night coughed, "I'm sorry?"
"You should be!"
"Okay," Vinyl looked over the list of entries she'd been keeping, trying to ignore the two Honnoji Academy loopers unexpectedly making out at the next table over, "Still a bit early to decide a winner, but..." she laughed, rolling her eyes, "Well, for one, I think Carmen's kinda got the most insane theft nailed down here with sunrises, at lea-"
"Waaaaaiiiit!"
"Gah!" The Mistress of Wubs yelped at Pinkie's sudden exclamation, "Branches, Pinkie! What?"
"Weeeeeell..." the party mare rolled her tongue, "I've done one already, but I have another one."
"And you think you can outdo me?" Carmen Sandiego shrugged, "Go ahead, I’d like to see someone try-"
"I stole Time."
Another odd hush fell over everyone in the bar, the pink earth pony once again the center of attention.
"...Alright." Carmen chuckled at the apparent attempt to one-up her, "You have my attention."
"Pinkie." Twilight spoke up, her face a frowning mask, "I thought we agreed never to speak of that loop."
"Never Pinkie Promised. Doesn't count." Pinkie stuck her tongue out. For several moments, Twilight made choked noises of complaint, before sighing and shaking her head.
"Fine." she glanced at Mac, "I need another drink."
"Twilight? You're overreacting a teensie bit, methinks." Rarity arched her brow from her seat next to the party planner, "That loop wasn't nearly as bad as you're making out."
"And? Pinkie Pie stole the concept and passage of Time itself. And pocketed it. Without crashing the loop. And still won't tell us how she did it!" Twilight nodded to Berry in thanks as her drink, a particularly strong beverage, arrived, "Forgive me if it's not something I want to think too much about.”
(BIOS-Pherecydes)
"Does it count if it's not something I stole? Cause Roman's not here right now, but I've seen his trophy room and I think this one should count." Sun piped up as Mac passed Twilight her drink.
Vinyl frowned for a second, before shrugging. "Eh. Why not? Lay it on us."
"Okay, so, while I was still 'apprenticing' under him, Roman took me on a tour of his Pocket so he could show me what I had to work towards. Otherwise known as showing off and rubbing my face in how much better he is at taking things than me. The centerpiece of his collection though is this huge ass microscope behind some stanchions pointing at an apparently empty pedestal."
"What, did he steal the cold or something?" Yang asked jokingly.
Sun grinned. "Actually, yeah. But that was in a different area. This was something way smaller. According to him, he used a time machine to go back to the very beginning of the universe and stole the Big Bang. Then he wrapped it inside the paradox that caused and used it to keep it stable. I got to look through the microscope at the singularity of creation."
Yang blinked. "Okay, that's actually pretty freaking impressive."
"I know, right? He calls it God's Fingerprint and says if he ever gets the chance he wants to try and see if he can use it to get past the Pearly Gates so he can rob Heaven blind."
Carmen outright laughed at that. "That man certainly has ambition, I'll give him that. Remind him next time you see him that I still plan to settle our debts from our last encounter when he took my hat."
Sun nodded. "No problem. For the record though, your hat was his previous centerpiece."
Carmen just smirked. "Flattery won't get him any leniency, but it's appreciated all the same."
(Wixelt)
"The Pacific Ocean. Without disturbing any of the other seas." Lyra, or more specifically Seapony Lyra, spoke up, laughing nervously, "I heard about Atlantis apparently being real that loop and decided to look for it."
"That doesn't seem like a theft." Vinyl mused, "More like a means to an end."
"Tell that to the news people." the blue mare shrugged, "I mean, I was going to put the water back, but the loop ended before I got a chance."
"...do you still have it?"
"Yeah, obviously." Lyra nodded, before frowning at the adjudicator's confused expression, "What? You think it's easy finding somewhere to get rid of that much water?"
(Evilhumour)
"I stole all reflections in one such Loop," Gabriel Angelos said with a bit of pride in his voice. "All of them, even those in the eye."
"How did you do that?" Vinyl asked, frowning. "I mean, I'm willing to call you out on that one."
"Well-" the Astartes began, only to have a much larger man interrupt him.
"He's a Blood Raven." Magnus the Red said with a smug voice. "If you leave them alone in a room for more than a second, they'll steal everything in it and the room. I believe he did this without a doubt."
His possible gene-son glared at him, losing his chance to explain his great heist.
"Well, I've got one," an Earth pony said, slamming his hoof onto the table before glaring at it. "I still don't get why I'm a frickin' pony and you're still a human, Sammy." He grumbled at his brother.
"It is a mystery," Castiel said with a knowing smile that caused Dean to grumble more.
"Well, anyways, I stole a picture from Hitler," Dean said with a grin, pulling out a painting. "Pretty rare, eh?"
Everyone simply stared at Dean with an awkward silence filling the room. "Um Dean," Vinyl said, scratching the back of her head. "That's not rare at all; I mean, I think we all have one from Hitler." Dean looked around to see every Looper present to pull out a painting of themselves with the signature of Adolf Hitler scrawled in the corner.
"I'm not sure who is going to win this contest, but I'm pretty sure that means you just lost Dean." Sam said, causing his brother to swear loudly.
<I once stole every right sock.> Ax said, causing everyone to stare at the Andalite.
Vinyl simply blinked at that and then frowned, tapping her table. "Every right sock... and you can't even wear footwear," Vinyl muttered before looking around. "I think we've got a winner here."
There was a general sound of agreement from the crowd before someone called out, "Why the right sock?"
<Because all the left ones were already taken.> Ax replied to the booing crowd of his friends.
208.5 (Wixelt)
It started, as most loops in Equestria did, with a book about the two alicorn sisters, and Nightmare Moon's sealing. The air was clear, and the chirping of the birds told the recently Awoken Twilight that the fauna was apparently somewhat normal this time around.
Then, almost as soon as the thoughts had crossed her mind, every suddenly went off on a rather abrupt tangent.
"Hit the deck!"
Twilight yelped in alarm as a familiar pink blur tackled her to the floor.
"Pinkie, what the bu-" the Anchor began, scolding her friend, but was cut off as a loud thud reverberated through the area. Tentatively, Twilight glanced over Pinkie's shoulder, finding that, much to her surprise, there was now a giant squid sat flailing atop the hill she'd started the loop on, the tree she'd been reading under crushed beneath it. She stared for a moment, mouth agape, "...the buck?"
"It wasn't my fault!" Pinkie began fulminating dramatically, which was to say loudly protesting, gesturing wildly as she backed off from Twilight, "I, just, uh, got a teensie bit carried away with... stuff."
"I hadn't accused you of anything yet." Twilight sighed with exasperation.
"And I really appreciate that."
"But..."
"Aww... There's always a 'but'..."
"Would you care to explain?"
"...I may have... sort of..." Pinkie rolled her tongue, looking incredibly guilty, "Awoken a tad early and not-on-purposefully freed Discord?" she giggled apprehensively, "I mean, he was Awake too, buuuut..."
"Pinkie." Twilight coaxed, the purple unicorn shaking her head lightly.
"Weeell... I definitely made sure Celestia didn't find out about what I maybe did," the party mare said in a way that told Twilight this was the opposite of anything even resembling the truth, "And I abso-tivi-lutely didn't get into a prank war with Discord that I wasn't at all prepared for in a Null Loop." Pinkie seemed to shrink in presence ever so slightly as her voice became mildly panicked at the distant screams of fleeing ponies, "And I obviously didn't try to one up him by making it rain cakes tailored to everypony's individual likes and stuff without access to my pocket doodads or Chaos powers, and end up making it rain giant dragon squids instead because Celestia burst in on me and made me spill pink all over everything..."
"Dragon squid...?" the Anchor frowned, before glancing over at the giant sea creature now beginning to eye the pair with an uncomfortable hunger, and finding that, yes, the entity did in fact have a somewhat squamous hide that reminded Twilight of some varieties of dragon, "Huh. How did Discord retaliate?"
"He, uh, heh..." Pinkie rubbed the back of her head anxiously, "He hasn't yet. I made him Pinkie Promise not to until all the squids went poof."
"...Wait, what do you mean, 'Poo-"
*POOF*
With an explosion of magical energy and pink-ish smoke, the colossus before them vanished back from whence it came, leaving an evident colored stain on the surrounding landscape. Twilight blinked several times, before breaking down into a fit of giggles, though whether they were of amusement or hysteria, not even her current companion could tell.
"You can be such a dork sometimes, Pinkie."
"I try."
208.6 (LadyStina2)
Despite the ‘OPEN’ sign, there was a knock on the library door. Twilight sighed, marked the page of the book she was currently reading, and trotted to the door.
She used her magic to open the door and saw a light blue mare wearing a purple wizard’s hat and robe. And, perhaps even more unusual, she wasn’t one of the colorful locals.
A piece of paper floated to her with a light pink aura as the mare said, “The Great and Powerful Trixie has decided to grace you with her application!” She smugly walked past Twilight and sat on the couch.
Uninvited.
“And she sent you to give it to me?” Twilight asked as she magically took the offered paper in her own aura.
The mare blinked in stunned surprise and then sputtered, “Wha… No! I… I mean me, Twilight! That’s my application.”
“Ok. Ok. Sheesh,” Twilight replied then muttered, “Just not used to ponies speaking about themselves in the third person…” She glanced down at the application and raised a questioning eyebrow. “I’m sorry… Trixie, was it? But this appears to be an application for a teaching position.” She gestured at the books surrounding them and continued, “As I’m sure you’ve noticed, this is a library.”
Trixie rolled her eyes and replied, “Well, of course I’ve noticed. But that’s not for now. I’m just trying to get ahead of the crowds. You never let me be a teacher! And since Chryssie isn’t Awake, I thought this would be a good time.”
Twilight glanced up at the loft and wondered if she was still asleep and this was some strange dream she was having. After giving herself a subtle pinch, she rubbed the now sore area and looked back at the strange mare.
Twilight sent the paper back to Trixie and said, “I’m sorry, but I’m not a member of the school board. You can probably ask the current school teacher, Cheerilee.”
Trixie ignored the paper, sat up from her relaxed position on the couch, and suddenly gave Twilight a scrutinizing look. After a moment of staring, Trixie squinted her eyes further and said, “Anchor. Looping. Yggdrasil. Sunset Shimmer? Starlight Glimmer?”
Suddenly her eyes widened and she sat back and chuckled. “You-” she started laughing and continued trying to get her sentence out. “You have no idea what I’m talking about, do you?” She laughed some more and stood up. “I must sound crazy!” She trotted to the door and said over her shoulder, “You just keep that application, Sparkle. In fact, have Rarity hold on to it. I’ll come back in six or seven years.”
She left the library and even more laughter erupted from behind the closed door.
208.7 (Wixelt)
In the 1000th year, a crack musician unit was sent to prison by the royal court for a crime against music they didn't commit. These five blue... folk, promptly escaped from a maximum-security stockade to the Canterlot music underground. Today, still wanted by Celestia, they survive as artists of fortune. If you need a heartsong, if no-pony else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire... The L-Team!
"No, Seapony."
"C'mon!" the blue aquatic mare whined, "We don't get a body each every loop, y'know! And we're wanted anyway. Might as well make the best of it."
"Celestia's Awake and you know it." Human glared, "We could just ask her to clear us."
"And ruin the setup?" Seapony complained.
"Can't we just have a normal loop?"
"Define normal. There's five Bon Bons this loop too." Thief rolled her eyes.
"And? That's one each." the biped mused, "We don't have to share for once."
"And they're a match for each of us." Sweetroll grinned.
"...okay, fair point." Seapony nodded, then frowned, muttering to herself, not really wanting to think too much about Sweetroll Bon Bon, "But it could be fun..."
"Next time, maybe." Pony looked up from her book, "It's really something we ought to have a plan for in advance."
208.8 (Evilhumour, Vinylshadow, Tangent)
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” Cozy Glow screamed as she was held over the massive creature’s mouth, it licking its sharp as super knives teeth.
“Now Cozy Glow, are you going to try and take over the nation?” the strange alicorn, Nyx or whatever Nightmare Moon was calling herself now.
“NONONONO!” she screamed, terrified out of her mind right now and not even caring how she learned of her plans.
“You promise?”
“Yes, for Celestia’s sake, I promise!” she shouted before being dropped roughly onto the ground with the freakish large wolf growling at her.
“You better,” Nightmare Moon glared at her, flashing her fangs at Cozy before shaking her and storming away past Fluttershy. Cozy could hear the alicorn grumbling under her breath, “My husband wouldn’t have even bothered to threaten you, you damn brat.”
Fluttershy gave Nightmare Moon a look before turning to Cozy. “While I need to talk to Russ about this, I do hope you learned your lesson Cozy.”
Cozy nodded her head as fast as she could, quickly rethinking her entire plan so they didn’t involve enraging any of these crazy ponies.
Nyx then poked her head back into the room with an irritated glare on her face.
"And don't even think about rethinking any plans, because I can read minds at fifty thousand kilometers on a bad day. Have a nice day," she then added cheerfully before withdrawing.
Discord then appeared and turned to face Nyx. "Just out of curiosity, what do you read on a good day?" he asked.
"Books." Nyx replied.
Twilight preened at that and said, "I taught her well."
208.9 (Wixelt)
"Um..." Twilight frowned, "Should I come back later?"
She'd been greeted, somewhat unexpectedly, by the sight of Rarity huddled in the corner of her boutique's main room, a distant and haunted look in her eyes. Given Twilight knew she'd only just Awoken, considerably later than the others present, that being herself and Spike, who was presently attempting to comfort his other half, this was mildly concerning.
"N- no, dear, it's f- fine..." the fashionista shivered visibly, "Just had... well, I- I suppose you could call it an interesting variant..."
"That bad?" Spike frowned.
"It was... a fused loop with the Starcraft branch, I believe." Rarity managed, attempting to compose herself, "My presence may have added a certain... clothing-based aspect to proceedings, however..."
"That..." Twilight and Spike shared a confused look, before the purple Anchor continued, "That doesn't sound so awful..."
"You don't understand, Sparkle." the marshmallow unicorn shot back, pulling her husband close for comfort, "There was no room for compromise." she whimpered, "No matter what I did or how much I made, I had to construct additional nylons!"
If it hadn't been for her friend's clear post-fashion nightmare distress and general upset demeanor, Twilight would've begun slamming her head against the nearest wall then and there.
208.10 (Gamma Cavy) [MLP/DNAngel]
He woke, and climbed unsteadily to his- hooves? He twisted his neck to look at blood red wings rising from an equine back. Sighing, he flopped down and closed his eyes, reaching inwards for a familiar presence.
His other self shook out his violet mane of spikes and asked, "What now?"
Twilight wasn’t sure what to make of Great Heart, Dash's current replacement. The young stallion was kind, polite, quiet, hardworking, and had adapted to a pegasus form with ease, seeming more troubled by having four legs than wings or the fact that he had to manage the weather.
As Nightmare Moon proclaimed her return, he had been calm still, rather than the surprise of most replacement loopers to the goddess. Oh, the surprise was there, but easily missed in his calm tranquility.
The walk through Everfree went as it did in baseline except for two things: The Shadowbolts failed to appear at the broken bridge and Great Heart seemed to zone out at a few odd moments, and when he did she felt power gathering around him, but then his gaze turned outward again and it dissipated.
Who in Yggdrasil was he?
Nightmare Moon billowed out of her tornado before the Elements inert forms, and Great Heart stepped forward.
"Get the Elements!" He yelled, and dove straight for the mare of darkness.
Curious Twilight kept half an eye on his fight, knowing better than to interrupt a Guest Element’s trial for them, and this was clearly what the fight was.
After the stallion had impacted the wall for a second time, Nightmare Moon levitated a large pile of rocks over him. "And stay down, foalish fool!"
Twilight sent off the usual spark to activate the Elements as she spoke, but to her surprise they remained inert. Loyalty refused to respond, and it crashed the rest.
"Now then," Nightmare Moon turned to her, shrugging off Applejack's rope as a nuisance, but paused as stone slid.
"I'm not..." Great Heart shook the remaining rocks off "done... yet..."
He spread his wings and lowered his head.
"Charging me? Again? Foal, have you not learned?" Nightmare Moon scoffed incredulously.
"I've learned," Great Heart said, as his coat began to darken, shadows rippling across him. "I can't beat you." The magic she had felt before swelled, and as it flared, his legs elongated with an audible crunch of bone, spine and ribs stretching similarly until he was taller than the dark alicorn. His wings darkened as well, from scarlet to blood red to deep madder to black, spreading proudly even as his body warped so audibly.
Tossing his head, the immense black Pegasus shook out his mane of violet spikes that shifted in a minor version of a mane aura and declared, "But I can."
"What are you?" The other mares exclaimed at once. "And where's Great Heart?" Pinkie added.
"He's stepped aside." the black stallion said reassuringly. "And I am a phantom. The shadow in the night. I am darkness bound to my host bloodline, and so given thought and will of my own. I," he declared with pride, shaking out wings larger than any Pegasus, any alicorn, could bear, blackness dripping from them like smoke, "am Phantom Dark!"
In short order, the Pegasus with magic suspiciously like an alicorn's had backed Nightmare Moon into a corner.
Dark flashed Twilight a grin. "Figured out the Elements yet?"
"Oh, yes," she replied. She'd actually been staring at the battle in fascination, but Loyalty had accepted its holder, and the activation was simple as breathing. She listed off the traits that each of her friends embodied with practiced ease, sliding the respective sphere to one after another in turn, and as each mare touched hers it became the gem Twilight knew so well. "Great Heart, who gave up his body to someone who could fight you effectively, rather than allow even one of us to be harmed, is the Element of Loyalty, and I-" her crown settled above her horn, where it belonged, "am the Element of Magic!"
The rainbow struck true.
208.11 (Wixelt)
"Zecora?"
"Yes, Gilda?"
"Why in the rotting branches are there aardvarks everywhere this loop?"
"Well," the zebra hummed, observing the veritable horde of rampaging creature laying waste to Ponyville, "If we knew that, I am sure the matter would have been resolved by now." she frowned, "As it stands, this destruction is something we will have to allow."
"...really?" Gilda raised an eyebrow, flicking her tail irritably, "Rhymes on a dime at this time?"
"It is a choice I have made, so do not pull at my yoke." Zecora smirked, "For you do not see me noting your theft of Twilight's joke."
"Well, I, uh..."
208.12 (Wixelt, katfairy, Evilhumour, CrazyCog, VO1D, FTKnight, Captain Titus, ThanatosTiger, Garebel, dankovskimark4, wildrook, Jesse Lee, BlueStarOfTheSouth, mariic)
In The Numbers
‘400 Error. Please contact your administrator.’
“Darn thing!” Apple Bloom growled, whacking the top of the computer monitor lightly with a screwdriver, before taking a deep breath and setting it down for a moment. When she’d decided to try and give Equestria a conventional, non-magical Internet system for the loop, she hadn’t expected there to be this many bumps in the road.
Of course, the lack of satellites or similar wasn’t helping, but wasn’t the only issue, as she had to have seen every error-based status code in the system at this point.
“400, 401, 402, 404…” the engineer grumbled to herself, “Has to be the most stubborn computer ever.”
“Doubt it.”
“Oh really?” Bloom rolled her eyes, glaring across at the Admin responsible for the remark, currently busy lounging in a sunbeam at the far end of her desk, “Well, I don’t see ya’ll helping, ya know.”
“Nah, you’ve got this.” Tama shrugged, stretching, “Besides, Yggdrasil is more of a pain than this, trust me.”
“At least ya don’t get numbers thrown at you every five damn seconds, though.”
“Don’t count on it.” the cat rose lazily, fixing the youngest of the Apple siblings with a bemused stare, “Tree’s kinda abstract in how it’d tell Admins what was wrong, so we started assigning numbers and codes to things as we interpreted them, so we knew what they were.” she giggled slightly, “Still do, actually, though not every one of us uses that interface. Some of them are… oddly specific.”
“Somehow ah think ya’ll are exaggerating for effect.” Apple Bloom narrowed her eyes, tapping her computer keyboard with one hoof, then groaning as another error came up, “410?! Son of a-”
“Easy!” Tama rolled her eyes, ear flicking anxiously, “Think you might be pushing that one a little far?”
“Doubt it.” the redheaded earth pony snarked.
“...okay. Don’t believe me?” the feline Admin’s paw blurred for a moment, before a pamphlet of some description materialized within it, “This is just a taster, albeit watered down dimensionally. Have a read and then tell me I'm wrong.” she smirked unnervingly, “Maybe I'll tell you some horror stories if you’re not sold by then.”
“Alright, fine! Geez.” Bloom scooped the docket up, scanning it’s cover with her eyes, then frowned, looking back at Tama, “Would ya’ll be willing to look at my computer in the meantime, though?”
“Ugh. Fine.”
So You’re a New Admin!
Looper Review Edition
Congratulations! If you’re reading this and aren’t a curious looper provided this to answer a question, it means you’ve qualified for a position as the Admin of a soon to be activated branch, and this is your first assignment.
Whilst you may or may not already know this, we as Admins have an extensive set of numbered status messages programmed into our interface with Yggdrasil to assist us in interpreting the abstract messages and issues it throws our way. These messages range from incredibly broad in meaning to heavily specific, depending on which Admin added them and for what purpose.
Whilst older Admins, being more experienced, have little need for these codes, hence why you might have seen them so rarely, you may find them invaluable in identifying just what your branch is trying to tell you. Since the number of codes is so extensive that providing a full list in an introductory guide would be impossible, this pamphlet will instead offer you a small range of examples to give you an idea of what to expect going forward. Rest assured, a full documentation list will be provided with the details of your assignment.
In the meantime, feel free to peruse this list for as long as you require, and be sure to ask if you have any questions. Despite the urgency of our jobs and how our workspace is structured, there’s nothing wrong with requesting assistance if you really need it.
-----
1 - Fused Loop in progress.
2 - Anchor induced Loop Crash in progress.
3 - Looper induced Loop Crash in progress.
7 - aka “Soviet Russia” - Yggdrasil attempting to administrate you. Take no further significant action until this has passed.
8 - Branch activation failed. Catastrophic data loss. Branch to be stored in Niflheim until further notice.
9 - aka “Muspelheim Protocol” - Large portions of data to be purged due to mass corruption. Nature of corruption may vary. For further information, contact a Senior Admin.
10 - aka “Helheimr Protocol” - Branch to be locked under Quarantine until further notice.
11 - aka “Laegjarn Protocol” - Branch to be locked under Quarantine indefinitely.
15 - aka “Ephraemi Protocol” - Routine backups and/or updates of branch Baseline in progress. Necessitated by increased Looper activity and growing number of Fused Loops causing minor data corruption.
36 - “Pink” energy released in branch. Culprit either Pinkie Pie [Equestria Branch] or Slaanesh [Dark Millennium Branch]. Situation low-risk but Fenrir should be notified.
42 - ‘Category 2’ event imminent, akin to the incident regarding the Forgotten Branch. All branches not affected are to be placed on emergency reserve, and all Admins are to report in immediately.
54 - Extensive fire damage detected in critical branch systems. Suppression countermeasures advised.
78 - Looper has exposed an invulnerable object to a weapon/spell that can destroy anything. Loop Crash imminent. Admin supervision advised.
79 - Looper has applied an unstoppable force to an immovable object. Loop Crash imminent. Admin supervision advised.
80 - Unstoppable force and immovable object surrendered to one another. Loop Crash averted. Further action unnecessary.
108 - Looper(s) are, for no discernible reason, something else.
115 - Zombie apocalypse variant in progress. Does not apply to branches with zombies as Baseline.
236 - Elevator Glitch in progress. Record all data during this event. Unless you are authorized, send said data to your Senior Admin for review.
314 - Pie related incident in progress.
318 - Leman Russ [Dark Millennium Branch] related Loop Crash in progress. Likely causes noted as either his bad cooking [318.1] or the poor driving of anything not classified as a Tank [318.2].
333 - Near-Catastrophic distortion of time within given loop. Admin supervision advised. May also cause minor steam based glitches if the Black Mesa, Green Flu, Mann Co. or Aperture Science Branches are the affected loop.
400 - Shaggy Rogers and Scooby Doo [Mystery Inc. Branch] got into another foot-race with Rincewind [Discworld Branch], and ended up in parallel dimension again.
404 - Yggdrasil attempted to access non-existent data regarding Forgotten Branch. Admin supervision advised.
410 - Yggdrasil thought Looper was someone else, but it was actually Dio [Joestar Branch].
418 - aka “I’m a Teapot” - Cuil Cascade or other Cuil related incident in progress. Admin supervision advised.
548 - Ian Malcolm [Jurassic Park Branch] attempted to improve the Ping. Admin supervision advised to avoid Loop Crash. This code will display a numeric counter.
616 - aka “Lightbringer Protocol” - 2nd ‘Category 1’ event imminent, akin to the incident that necessitated the Loops to begin with. Abandon your work station immediately and find shelter. If you cannot, or if a safe place does not exist, it was an honor to work with you.
621 - aka “Ctrl-F-U” - Michael Caboose [Blood Gulch Branch] team-killed a visiting Looper. Press noted keys for further instructions. This code will display a numeric counter.
666 - MLE (Malicious Looping Entity) loop disruption with intent to harm. Immediate action required.
777 - Bizarre luck levels detected. Likely cause noted as presence of Setback [Sentinels Branch].
789 - Tiamat (the Looper) [Dungeons & Dragons Branch] related Loop Crash in progress. Likely cause noted as consumption of the present Anchor.
913 - Pinkie Pie [Equestria Branch] related Loop Crash in progress.
999 - Cirno [Touhou Branch] related incident in progress.
1225 - Nostalgia Critic [Channel Awesome Branch] related Loop Crash in progress. Likely cause noted as said Looper’s love of Christmas.
1337 - Lingo-Elitist Glitch in progress. All skills/abilities/power-ups acquired during this loop are to be marked as Read Only.
1448 - Yggdrasil attempting to activate the FATAL Branch. Immediate Senior Admin supervision necessary. If not available, attempt should be nullified as soon as possible, even to the extent of a Loop Crash.
2319 - Looper attempting to pocket a Read Only or otherwise unpocketable object. Admin supervision advised.
2418 - Brawl or other manner of fight in progress involving high numbers of Loopers.
58008 - Eiken Branch punishment loop in progress. No action required for the time being.
79203 - Tokusatsu-type transformation trinket appeared in non-native branch independent of any Looper pocketing it.
209135 - Time Paradox in progress. Loop Crash imminent. If instigated by Looper [209135.1], punish with Eiken or similar. If not Looper related [209135.2], or if harmful to Yggdrasil, Admin supervision advised. Otherwise, allow paradox to cause Loop Crash.
"...okay, so this..." Apple Bloom blinked several times, setting the pamphlet down. She sat silently for a moment, contemplating something, "Well that was..." she shook her head rapidly, glancing back at Tama, who seemed to be busy playing with a piece of string, "Ah'm not sure what that was. You sure I was meant to see this?"
"It's not hurting anyone." Tama shrugged as much as a cat could, half her attention still on the string, "And most of the really scary stuff's been taken out."
"Such as?"
"Such as i'm not allowed to tell you and wouldn't even if you begged, which I sincerely hope you do not." the Admin was abruptly deadly serious for a moment, catching Bloom wholly off guard, "I kinda don't want to be called into Skuld-butt's office, thank you very much." she became oddly morose for a second, visibly shuddering, before mumbling, "Lightbringer's got nothing on Code 0..."
"What was that?"
"Nothing! You heard nothing."
"...fine." Bloom rolled her eyes, hoofing the pamphlet back to the feline, "Ya'll want this back? I think ah've had enough insight into Admin duties for now..."
208.13 (Wixelt)
"Okay, okay. What's this abou-"
Twilight was abruptly cut off from her opening statement as an orange hoof very suddenly and frantically covered her mouth, it's owner hissing for her to be quiet. Frowning for a moment, Applejack gradually removed the hoof, then slipped into a whisper.
"Not so loud, Twi."
"...fine." the Anchor conceded, dropping her volume, "What's the matter? I thought you were taking the loop to get back to your roots."
"Well, I was." Equestria's Second sighed, shaking her head, "But look," she grimaced, "There's... something loose in the orchard, stealin' all the apples, y'see."
"Like... a timberwolf, or..."
"Ah'm pretty sure it's the Snark."
"...but I'm right here."
"Not you." AJ rolled her eyes, "The Lewis Carrol beastie."
"Oh..." Twilight's face fell, "That... is certainly something. Is it a Boojum?"
"Usually is, but there ain't rightly any way to tell, since any non-Looper who could tell us is probably gone now. Got Pinkie on the case 'cause of it." she gestured to the pink pony pronking patiently next to her, "If anypony can out-think the dang thing, I figure it's her."
"Yeppers." Pinkie grinned, pulling a pair of binoculars from her pocket, as well as a rather oddly colored cake, turning and poising herself to move, before pausing, "Snarks like strawberry cake, right?"
"I thought you'd know, sugarcube."
"Isn't every day you even get to meet a Snark, silly." the Chaos Goddess giggled, before bouncing off into the trees, cake inexplicably in her grasp.
"Heh." Applejack shook her head, then looked back to Twilight, who now had a thin book labelled as 'The Hunting of the Snark' grasped in her telekinesis, "You trying gettin' a refresher? Ya'll know the poem's a bunch of nonsense, right?"
"I do." the purple unicorn nodded, "But there is some detail in it. For example," she turned the book, using her magic to label several passages of the tale, "Ignoring the blatantly unprovable entries, snarks are known to be ambitious, but without much of a sense of humor."
"I know that. Why'd ya thing I called Pinkie?" the farmer shrugged, then glanced at the distant sun, by now low on the horizon, "They also sleep late in the day, if i''m rememberin' correctly."
"Right." Twilight nodded, spinning the book around again. A moment of reading later, she frowned heavily, "Um... AJ?"
"Yes, Twi?"
"You do remember the member of the Bellman's crew the Boojum Snark vanishes, right?"
"Of course I do. Hard to forget. It's the Baker, righ-" the orange earth-pony stopped in her tracks, mind locking up for a moment, before she cursed, "Ah horse-apples! Pinkie!"
"Applejack! Twilight! I found it! I found the Snark!"
The two Loopers looked at each other in panic, before dashing forward in the direction of their friend's shout, Twilight expediting the process with a rapid teleport.
There was no Pinkie to be found, however, only an abandoned yet neatly set down cake sitting alone in the clearing her voice had come from, a mysteriously large and jagged bite having been taken out of it.
"Huh." Applejack blinked, not sure what to feel, "...I guess snarks do like strawberry cake." she shivered, visibly uncomfortable with the sudden disappearance, "What are the chances of Pinkie telling us what she saw next loop?"
"Slim to none, all things considered." Twilight looked sadly at the cake. Even if Pinkie would be back next loop, Awake or not, this was still a little upsetting, "Mac's bar?"
"He ain't Awake, remember?"
"Damn."
208.14 {continuation of 207.10} (katfairy) [MLP/D&DC]
Hank lowered the bow, relieved beyond telling that they hadn’t crashed the Loop yet. Even better, Nameless’s massive cumulonimbus was completely gone, leaving blue skies occasionally striped by black smoke rising from the slag piles that used to be dunes. Suspecting that it hadn’t been quite that easy, Hank looked around for any indication he was still around. At first, it all looked as quiet as the aftermath of a massive magical battle could be, but then he spotted a figure that would have been massive if it hadn’t been dwarfed by the slag piles. Nameless was still there, but at least depowered, although probably not as much as they’d like. Hank doubted the Elements had completely stripped him of his powers or converted him to the side of Goodness and Light either. On the other hand, that figure was lying crumpled and smoking on the ground, so a second blast might not be needed.
“Did… did we actually win?” Eric sounded incredulous, and Hank couldn’t blame him. This was the first time they’d ever managed more than a stalemate without crashing the Loop, after all.
“I think we did,” he replied, keeping his bow ready just in case.
“At the very least, we have weakened him,” Venger said, voice more quiet than usual. “Still, I would not lower your guard.”
“Not planning on it.” Hank walked toward Nameless, assessing him with each step. He was still huge, but a more normal huge—maybe about twenty feet tall. That was all Hank could see for the physical aspect, and a quick dip into Valdemaran Mage Sight let him know that full use of it would be a Bad Idea; Nameless was weakened but still at least on a level with Twilight Sparkle going full power. As he approached, Nameless stirred and slowly rose to his feet. Hank raised his bow the tiniest bit higher, tensing.
“DO YOU FOOLS TRULY BELIEVE THAT YOU CAN DEFEAT ME?”
The voice was loud and deep, almost felt more than heard. Once, Hank would have been impressed or intimidated, but these days he just found it pretentious.
“We pretty much have,” he pointed out. “Your power is diminished, and we all know it doesn’t return that quickly so don’t even try it. You’ve lost. You can’t have Venger or the Realm. You’ve still got the power to take out any one of us, but together? Not a chance.”
“THEN I SHALL TAKE THAT ONE.” Nameless raised glowing hands. Hank responded by raising his glowing bow.
“No.”
Nameless’ hood fell back, revealing one of the uglier monsters Hank had seen in the Loops, with the requisite yellowed fangs, red eyes, horns, etc. Once again, he wasn’t impressed. He was, however, reminded of something. He felt Tiamat react with alarm, then relax as she realized that his mind wasn’t shattered by the realization he’d just had: he really could end this, here and now, and probably keep him out until the end of the Loop. It would never work again, not like this, but he’d take his victories when and where he found them.
“HOW DO YOU PROPOSE TO STOP ME, MORTAL?” Nameless glared down at him, eyes following the glowing pattern. Hank just grinned back.
“Hey, Element of Honesty here; I’ll just use the truth.”
Nameless swelled with rage, but Hank kept himself from reacting in any way that could be sensed by anyone who wasn’t linked to him. He knew he was taking a big risk, and if he was wrong it was going to end badly. But he didn’t think he was.
You are not. But be careful of your wording, Dragonkin; do not allow him any loopholes.
Hank sent back a mental nod, waiting for a response from the enemy. He didn’t wait long.
“AND WHAT TRUTH COULD THE LIKES OF YOU USE AS A WEAPON AGAINST ME?”
Hank dropped the grin, looking his enemy right in the eye.
“I name you, Chernobog. I bind you by your name, Chernobog. I banish you, Chernobog. From this moment, you may not return to the Realm. From this moment, you may not threaten anyone here. From this moment, you may not interfere with the Realm, Equestria, or any world with even the slightest connection to either. You have no more power here.”
Nameless—Chernobog—roared, lunging at Hank, but before he reached him, a maelstrom of iridescent cloud swirled up around him. It expanded rapidly, forcing Hank to retreat while that storm chasing Loop had him trying to figure where the new event placed on the Enhanced Fujita Scale.
“Hank, what in the name of ayahuasca is going on?” Twilight demanded, stepping up alongside him with wings flared.
“Right now, I think it’s a metaphysical EF2.”
The new cloud was developing occasional swirls of green-black, showing that Chernobog was fighting, but those swirls were quickly subsumed in the soft yet intense light.
“How did you know?”
“When I looked at him, it just came together. The Realm is a hodgepodge, we’ve known that since my first Hub-like when I got the script to the final episode and read the part of the Loop we never got to. Tiamat should have been my first clue, but when I got here, I didn’t know from Mesopotamian mythology so it never occurred to me to question it, and then later, I just figured it was one of those things I’d never get an answer to. Usually it doesn’t matter. But sometimes I wonder if other mythologies from back home might have gotten sucked in here too, and when I saw how much he looked like old Earth drawings of demons, I started going over destructive, malevolent deities. I knew I had the right one when Tiamat almost blew a mental gasket, and when my brain didn’t fry, I knew he was weakened enough for this to at least have a chance at working.”
“…Huh. Okay, that does make sense.”
Another surge in the power of the cloud had them all diving for what cover remained, shielding their eyes. They could feel the power flowing over and through them, just as when Venger’s soul had been restored, but instead of one quick burst, this lasted for enough time that Hank began to worry that he’d screwed up. Just as he was about to try… well, something, even if he couldn’t think of anything useful, it began to subside. The comparison to a tornado seemed even more apt than before, he decided as he regained his feet, blinking.
“Well,” Twilight said from beside him, “that went better than expected.”
208.15 (Wixelt)
A Life in Binary
"01010100 01110111 01101001 01101100 01101001 01100111 01101000 01110100?"
"01011001 01100101 01110011, 00100000 01010010 01100001 01110010 01101001 01110100 01111001?"
"01001001 01110100 00100000 01101101 01100001 01111001 00100000 01110011 01100101 01100101 01101101 00100000 01100001 00100000 01101100 01101001 01110100 01110100 01101100 01100101 00100000 01100011 01101100 01101001 01100011 01101000 01100101 00100000, 01100010 01110101 01110100..." 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110000 01110010 01100101 01110011 01100101 01101110 01110100 01101100 01111001 00100000 01100100 01101001 01110011 01100101 01101101 01100010 01101111 01100100 01101001 01100101 01100100 00100000 01110101 01101110 01101001 01100011 01101111 01110010 01101110 00100000 01101100 01101111 01101111 01101011 01100101 01100100 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110010 01101001 01100111 01101000 01110100 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110010 01100100 01110011, 00100000 "01010111 01101000 01111001 00100000 01100100 01101111 00100000 01110111 01100101 00100000 01100011 01101111 01101110 01110011 01101001 01110011 01110100 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001 00100000 01110011 01110100 01110010 01101001 01101110 01100111 01110011 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101100 01101111 01101111 01110000?"
"01000011 01110101 01101001 01101100 01110011, 00100000 01010010 01100001 01110010 01101001 01110100 01111001." 00100000 01010100 01110111 01101001 01101100 01101001 01100111 01101000 01110100 00100000 01110011 01101000 01110101 01100100 01100100 01100101 01110010 01100101 01100100 00100000 01100001 01110011 00100000 01101101 01110101 01100011 01101000 00100000 01100001 01110011 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110011 01100101 01110010 01101001 01100101 01110011 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01111010 01100101 01110010 01101111 01100101 01110011 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01101111 01101110 01100101 01110011 00100000 01100011 01101111 01110101 01101100 01100100 00100000 01101101 01100001 01101110 01100001 01100111 01100101, 00100000 "01000011 01110101 01101001 01101100 01110011..."
"01000100 01101111 00100000 01001001 00100000 01110111 01100001 01101110 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111?"
"01001110 01101111, 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01100100 01101111 00100000 01101110 01101111 01110100. 01001110 01101111 01110100 00100000 01100001 01100110 01110100 01100101 01110010 00100000 01101100 01100001 01110011 01110100 00100000 01110100 01101001 01101101 01100101."
Sane Person Translation:
"Twilight?"
"Yes, Rarity?"
"It may seem a little cliche, but..." the presently disembodied unicorn looked for the right words, "Why do we consist of binary strings this loop?"
"Cuils, Rarity." Twilight shuddered as much as a series of zeroes and ones could manage, "Cuils..."
"Do I want to know?"
"No, you do not. Not after last time."
208.16 (Boohoooo!) [MLP/Mighty Magiswords]
Twilight was flipping through a book, glad for a relatively calm loop so far. Spike then walked in, looking exhausted, and hugged Twilight.
"Everything ok Spike?" Twilight asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Ughhhh.. I now appreciate how hard raising a dragon must have been..." Spike groaned.
"...I assume this is a Loop thing?" Twilight hoped.
"Yeah. My unAwake self had decided to raise a fellow Dragon to prove something. But he's a handful!" Spike sighed. Grup then waddled in, screaming as bees chased him.
"SPIKE! HELP! BEES DON'T LIKE IT WHEN YOU STEAL THEIR HONEY!" The strange Dragon shouted. Spike and Twilight gave a deadpan expression before easily sending the bees off.
"YAY!" Grup cheered, hugging his 'father'... accidentally poking him in the eye.
"...Ow." Spike deadpanned.
"Oh no! I'll fix it!" Grup exclaimed.
Not even a minute later, Twilight's Castle had burned down.
"Don't worry I'll fix it!" Grup repeated.
Later…
Equestria was a desolate wasteland.
"...Yeah, there's no way to fix this." Grup coughed. Spike gave an exhausted sigh.
208.17 (Wixelt)
"Rainbow, drop it."
"C'mon Twi, you don't agree with me?"
"I didn't say that."
"But you thought it. I know that look!"
"This way lies only madness..." Twilight sighed to herself, setting down her book on the bar top and giving the technicolor pegasus a flat stare, "Okay, so to review, you seem to think that one of the Star Trek loopers would be classified as the, to use your words, 'Best Stealth Looper In The Multiverse'?"
"Yup, but I said Perfect Stealth Looper."
"In that case, I will take this time to inform you, for the third loop in a row that you've shared with me," the Anchor ground her teeth, "that there is no. Such. Thing."
"But Twi-"
"I'm not finished, Miriam." Twilight smirked as Rainbow unconsciously straightened up at the mention of her loop variable middle name, "Good. Now, I could just let you go on at me about this, but at this point I am at something of a breaking point, so I will instead leave you with this to think over:"
Slowly, the purple unicorn turned toward the original Loyalty bearer, a far too wide grin plastering her face. Immediately, a sense of dread and regret washed over Rainbow, and she was briefly able to make a mental note to make up for her obsession with this idea later, before Twilight opened her mouth.
"If there is such thing as a Perfect Stealth Looper," the Anchor chuckled, landing her master blow, "How would you even know?"
Without another word, Twilight packed her book into her pocket, gave a nod to a bemused looking Big Mac, and nonchalantly strolled out of the bar, leaving a certain rainbow mare sat still as a statue in utter incomprehension, eye twitching erratically.
208.18 (Evilhumour)
"Twilight, I must implore you to reconsider this idea," Luna said nervously, standing next to the stack of foal tracks made for those cars that despite all attempts never made a loop-de-loop. "This cannot end well."
"Luna, trust me, I've done the math fifty five times, I've done ninety eight simulations this morning," Twilight said as she placed the last piece of her plan into place before taking a step back in her library. "I've got a good hunch about this. What could possibly go wro-"
As if on cue, Rainbow Dash came soaring through the window only to get captured by the pegasus snatcher invention that Twilight had built, set Rainbow Dash along the long pieces of track placed throughout the tree house only for her to be launched back out the window from whence she came and into a plate of donuts that Pinkie Pie was carrying - to the competition between her, Donut Joe, and Gilda (and Grizelda); with Celestia, Chrysalis, Cheerilee and Cadance being the judges. Said action caused Pinkie Pie's donuts to go sailing through the sky, and managed to piercing each of the judge's horns. Said achievement was rather impressive, given that Cheerilee had been an Earth Pony seconds before.
Pinkie Pie's cries of anguish over once again losing to her eternal non-looping rival became blood-curdling war cries, as the griffon-and-snake team had been unanimously voted as the winner. Then the mare-who-was-not-a-pony-but-a-completely-terrifying-creature-aka-manifestation-of-parties-and-happiness turned her head around one hundred and eighty degrees, pointed a hoof at the Golden Oaks Library's inhabitants and launched herself at the library.
It was at that point that Angel Bunny, who had been hopping along, saw what was coming towards him, flexed out his paw and caught the enraged creature with the Force. He then examined the area, twitched his nose, hopped along to the judge's table, pulled out a lawn chair and a drink with an umbrella in it in one paw. He then let go of Pinkie with a smile on his little white face as the Golden Oaks was dissolved from the inside out.
It was several hours later, on a moon almost thirty nine thousand light-years away, that the two alicorns were left looking at each other, with Luna giving Twilight a fully unamused look.
"Okay," Twilight said with a grunt as she rolled her eyes. "So I forgot to carry that two, my bad."
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You messed up a formatting tag there. Screwed with the formatting of the rest of the loop. Thankfully, there was another set of italics later on; otherwise, it would've affected the entire web page, including the comments and sidebar. Still, you might want to fix that.
Yes!!! A new loop!!
10214926
Has that happened before? I thought that would have been something the FIMfic admins would have debugged by now if it is.
this reminds me of a scene in a comic book called "all-star Superman": a Sphinx-like being asks Superman "what happens when an irresistible force meet an immovable object?"
Superman thinks for a minute, then responds, "how about this? they surrender."
"response acceptable."
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I've seen it happen several times.
Is that...
Can any looper at all contain the full documentation within their pocket? Bearing in mind that most of the loopers depicted here can contain spaceships, exotic materials, and the occasional planet without blinking an eye, I wonder if the full documentation can be provided in dead tree form without collapsing into a tiny black hole.
Birch preserve any Looper who ascends and needs to actually read the full manfile...
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Funny thing is, that answer isn't logical, as it stops the unstoppable and moves the immovable. There are two schools of thought leading to actual answers though:
Option 1, the true Unstoppable Force and Immovable Object are, in fact, the same entity, making this a trick question. Such is part of being truly omnipotent, as the Christian God is.
Option 2, the two forces just pass through each other without affecting each other. This way, the force is not stopped, and the object is not moved. This is the result when two things are stated to be unaffected by anything else.
not sure what could be worse than lightbringer but im not sure we want to know
A legit question. Guess Rainbow never wrote a mystery novels.
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Similar to this, there's no bold stop on AB's internet loop, so up to the pamphlet is bolded.
It's nice to see this update again. I look forward to more crazy adventures of our immortals.
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The formatting issues are actually the result of some miscommunications with Saphroneth about what was ready to be published. As the person who's currently doing at least some of the editing for the chapters, I was expecting to be able to give this one a last look over for issues, but because it's been a while and this chapter was sitting in half-done status for that time, it was mistaken for complete. Not really any one person's fault.
I'm hopefully going to be going over the chapter shortly to rectify formatting errors so Saph can fix them here.
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You're only going to get the full file if you're an Admin anyway, so by that point a pocket isn't really an issue. I don't think we set a size limit for the guide/manual, though, given it was collaboratively written.
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Probably best not to. These are things not for mortal eyes. :P
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true, though 404 was particularly intersting, not sure if its hopeful or tragic, but it sounds like the system is still seeking the data, which we know to still exist in some capacity and its branch 'slot' still exists or it wouldnt be seeking at all. of course given the nature of the lost branch its recovery will never happen within the scope of the loops or at least its original form will never be restored
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Good to know! I'm not surprised that this was caused by those kinds of circumstances.
Great job as usual. Loved the 2319 reference.
I, don't know how to feel about that.
Sounds fun.
That's a lot.
Daaw.
You ballsy son of a bitch!
... I mean...
I'm inclined to agree.
She is. And we love her for it.
I've been there.
She's not Awake.
Oh, dealing with her.
Ah, Leman.
... Yes, yes Twilight yes you did.
I'm worried.
Oh, this is interesting.
Yes. It's her bit.
Oho!
You know, I believe you.
I'm worried.
Sounds about right.
Goddammit. DIO's meme capability extends even to Yggdrasil.
He's gotten better. Mostly.
I don't like the sound of that.
HAH!
Oh cool, that thing.
Nice work.
Those words worry me.
Wow. I think you crashed her brain.
WHY would you say that?
Quite.
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The entire thing was written with "It's snowing on Mount Fuji" as a prompt line. It better damn well be. :P
208.18 was so funny.
208.10
"...darkness bound to my host bloodline,"...
I thought it's was Jackie Estacado.
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thanks
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You’re welcome
This was very amusing, thanks for the great work.
Let's not forget Error Code 413. Yggdrassil trying to run SBURB never ends well.
Okay, it's definitely immature but this made me laugh. And is the "616 Lightbringer" error a reference to either Marvel or Fallout Equestria, or something I'm unfamiliar with, or is it just a coincidence?
this reminds me of a comic book where Spider-Man tricked a villain named "Decay" into doing something like that. the object was an important part of a more powerful villain's doomsday device...
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I thought that was patched? Enough for it to run, anyways.
Well that's terrifying. I can only imagine a code 0 if it's worse than this.
Wait, is the Lightbringer Protocol being 616 a coincidence? Because that was the original "number of the beast." Because that was the number of Nero.
It got changed to 666 because the spelling of Nero's name changed and it got helpfully corrected to still be clear.
Yay!
Pink Ponk Pronking Pony Party Planning Parlament