MLP Loops 145
145.1 (Bliss Authority)
"Jace?"
"Nissa."
"Why am I an elk?"
"The same reason that I'm a unicorn. We're in a Fused Loop with Equestria."
"Well, okay then. As long as I'm an elk I'll have some wildflowers. Want some?"
"...I'll pass, Nissa."
145.2 (Bliss Authority)
"You are too late to save him, Sparkhan Twi, great khan of no clan!" Nicol Bolas howled, turning his massive bulk over the fallen body of Ugin Spykoran and craning his neck. Crackling blightning pulsed from the black and red eye between the gap in his horns. "There is no magic on any plane that can save him! The future has been written, my little pony!"
"That's where you're wrong, Bolas!" Twilight said, leaning on her spear and trying her tree-damndest not to explode into giggles. All in all, the resemblance to Tirek was uncanny. "There is a magic that can bind you and save my TRUE mentor in Spike - the magic of Friendship!"
Nicol gave the collected loopers a glorious beat of sheer, stunned silence.
Sorin, Chandra, and Jace said at the same time: "What."
"You're kidding," Bolas said. "You're kidding, right?"
Twilight grinned. "Not at all!" She had been looking forward to this speech for the entire loop. "For we possess of the powers of friendship - we bear the legendary Elements of Dragons!"
"Man, what." Only Jace said it this time; Sorin Markov was too busy trying not to laugh, and Chandra had given up on not laughing the moment 'the powers of friendship' had left Twilight's lips.
"Impossible," he hissed. "I destroyed them long before your Sparks ignited, long before this moment!"
"That's where you're wrong, Bolas!" Twilight said, shaking with barely suppressed laughter. "For the - the Elements of Dragons -" she wheezed, then took a deep breath and continued on as if she hadn't missed a beat. "The Elements of Dragons are no artifacts to be shattered, no sorceries or enchantments to be countered, but a set of ideals that cannot be destroyed!"
She pointed to Applejack. "Applejack, who stood steadfast in the face of your draconic hordes and outlasted their attack, is the element of Endurance!"
And, lo and behold, a gleaming pearl in the form of a dragon's scale appeared in a golden torc around Applejack's neck.
"OH, COME ON!" Jace howled, which only caused Markov to burst out laughing. "SERIOUSLY!?" Meanwhile, Chandra bit her lower lip and grinned at the spectacle of Nicol Bolas boggling in slack-jawed disbelief.
Twilight pointed to Fluttershy. "Fluttershy! You held off their armies by awakening the ferocious bear within you, risking your mind and your life for the sake of your friends! You represent the Element of Savagery!"
An emerald on a claw-shaped charm materialized at her throat. "I didn't like it," she said. "But if nature must be red in tooth and claw, so must I."
"Pinkie Pie! You flummoxed his forces with harmless pranks before using your prowess in kung fu to disable his thralls!" She was cracking a smile; she had to hold it together long enough to finish the speech. Funny, how her foes never attacked her during any variation on it; was it like a Heartsong, that way? She'd need to research it later. "You are the Element of Cunning!"
A sapphire bindi in the shape of an eye appeared on her forehead - before Pinkie flipped her head up, did a hoofstand, and the torc fell into place around her shoulders. Which was quite a feat, considering its mouth was narrower than her head. "As Surprise wrote in the Analects of Fun: Tah-dah," she intoned solemnly.
"Rarity! Your willingness to use poison, the bodies of the slain, and to delve into the secrets of ancient magic from before the Mending for the sake of the greater good marks you as the Element of Ruthlessness!"
"What can I say? Classic counter-spells are simply more efficient." Rarity said - before backing up as an onyx in the shape of a fang twinkled into existence at her throat. "Dear me, I hope this thing isn't poisonous itself."
"Damn straight the old counter-spells are more efficient," Jace muttered, though he folded his arms and still looked like he was fuming internally.
"Rainbow Dash! The Sonic Rainboom you demonstrated during your raid on Bolas' forces proves that you exemplify the Element of Speed!"
A gleaming pair of ruby wings appeared, unfolding back around her throat. "What did I tell you?" she said, folding her fetlocks and leering at him. "You don't rule the skies, Bolas - I do."
That snapped the villainous planeswalker out of his fugue. "You shall die for insulting me, the greatest of planeswalkers, Nicol Bolas!"
"No you won't!" Twilight said, eagerly awaiting Bolas' straight line.
"Won't I? There were SIX elements! You bear merely five!"
Hook, line, and sinker. Twilight stared Nicol Bolas in his eyes and smirked. "Was it not written that a spark shall unite the five clans in the spirit of friendship? Do I not bearsuch a spark… planeswalker?"
Nicol's eyes widened. "No. IMPOSSIBLE!"
"Did I not unite the leaders of the five clans in the spirit of friendship?" Twilight said. "I am that spark, Bolas! I, both of and not of Tarkir, of and not of my time, am the heir to Ugin Spike's power!"
A crown - more like a helm - appeared on her head, with a noseguard sweeping down and five prongs sweeping behind it. In its center was a pentagon - a pearl at its top, and going clockwise, a sapphire, onyx, ruby, and emerald.
Chandra exploded into another fit of giggles at the sight, clutching her sides with her fetlocks.
"I am Sparkhan Twi, the Element of Magic - and of Friendship!" Twilight whooped. "And FRIENDSHIP IS DRAGONS!"
Five beams of light lanced out from five torcs - one of pure white, one of deep blue, one of void black, one of fiery red, and one of verdant green - and converged on Twilight's crown.
And she changed: the bones of her hooves splayed into claws, her back stretched and rippled, her wings - feathered, like a pegasus' - unfolded. And she grew to a scale that was a match for Nicol Bolas'.
"No! NO! NOOOOO!" Nicol cringed.
Twilight took a deep breath - then exhaled the Rainbow of Light.
Nicol took wing, dodging it. It figured; taking out Nicol wasn't in the cards in baseline. But her healing breath of pure mana washed over Spike's wounded form, stabilizing his mortal injuries.
"This is not over!" Nicol screeched. "Tarkir stands for now, but you have attracted the attention of beings that are infinitely your greater!"
"Let the Eldrazi come!" Twilight bellowed. "The Khans and Dragons will stand together against them, a force to make whole planes tremble!"
Nicol didn't dignify that with a response, instead choosing to Walk away from the plane of Tarkir. Twilight landed, shifting back into her normal form.
Or she tried, anyway. "Wings are a good look on you," Sorin remarked to his fingernails.
"Oh, HORSEFEATHERS," Twilight groaned, facehoofing. "Of course that made me go alicorn."
Jace sighed. "Twilight?"
"Yeah?"
Jace massaged his temples with the base of his frogs. "You didn't just bullshit all of the Elements of Dragons, did you? Because that's nowhere near baseline for us."
Applejack grinned at him. "The Elements of Harmony, on the other hoof, are in jus' about every Equestrian loop. Ain't fused loops grand?"
"Of course they are," Jace muttered. "Wait - are those Moxen!?"
145.3 (AnonymousAsk, Evilhumour, Gamerex27 Masterweaver, wildrook, Grammar Checked By Purrs)
"DO YOU WISH TO SEE PICTURES OF THEIR FOALHOOD?" Nightmare Velvet asked Twilight's smiling friends. The unicorn in question started banging her head against the wall.
This loop was just... ugh. Having her own mother be the nightmare was problematic enough, but having her be this overbearing... She was considering ending the loop early.
"WE DEMAND GRANDCHILDREN!" The mare shouted, looking at the blushing purple unicorn. "AND THAT THOU GOEST ON A DATE AND BRING HOME A PONY!"
Shining and Twilight face-hooved. At this point, they were glad she wasn't Looping in that form, or else she'd realize they couldn't. One rampage was enough.
"I have an adopted daughter," Twilight pointed out. "And Spike is arguably my son--"
"FROM WHENCE DID THEIR FATHER COME?!"
"Mom, I told you already, I'm asexual!"
"WE KNOW NOT THIS STRANGE TERM! WE ARE STILL DISPLEASED AT THE LACK OF VISITS!" The Nightmare shouted, giving her best look to the unicorn. "ARE WE AN EMBARRASSMENT TO THEE?"
"It means...oh, never mind. She's adopted!"
"SPEAK NOT OF THAT IN FRONT OF MY GRANDCHILD!"
"Look, Grandma, it's fine!" Nyx objected. "I knew about that all along!"
Shining groaned. 'She was never this bad when I first dated Cadance!' he thought. 'OR when Chrysalis posed as her.'
The Nightmare's eyes drifted to her elder child. "Dear son, hast thou practiced the safe method with your betrothed?"
"MOM!!!" Shining yelled.
"We are still awaiting an answer, dear son." The Nightmare frowned and walked closer. "Do we need to have the talk?""
"MOM!!!" Shining now squeaked, blushing from ear to hoof.
Chrysalis blinked as she, Trixie, and Sunset were looking at the Nightmare Velvet debacle, the latter two gaping.
"And now I'm glad my Baseline self never succeeded," she said. "Schadenfreude aside, this much pressure would make the hive antsy."
Nightmare Velvet turned to face the three. "What dost thou mean?" She looked at the three, the black mare gulping loudly.
"Ehehehe..." Chrysalis muttered. "Uh...LOOK, THERE'S SPIKE AND RARITY!"
Nightmare Velvet simply looked at the mare. "We shall talk later, mare, about what thou did to my family." She then turned to look at the drake and mare. "But We must inquire to Our other son's betrothed."
"Ummm... Well.... I..." Spike tried to talk but could not even complete a phrase. He whispered to Rarity, "Please, help me!"
Rarity looked up at Nightmare Velvet and smiled. "It is a pleasure to meet you, mother dear," she bowed, smiling. "Your dear son has been the perfect gentledrake, caring and honest to me."
Thunder roared as Nightmare Velvet looked to Rarity. "Thou are not taking Our son away, I know you want Us to drop Our guard but We are watching you."
'That's the idea, darling,' Rarity thought.
"Trixie and I are going to go find the Elements," Chrysalis said to the two siblings.
"Agreed," Twilight replied. "I'd rather face five Tireks than a Nightmare version of my own mother."
"Hey Nyx, I brought you some flowaaaaaaaaaaa...."
The yellow pegasus who had just arrived stared at the scene in front of him for a moment.
"...You know what? No. I'm going to turn around, wait for the giant rainbow, and then walk back."
"You weren't nearly this scared when we took down Khorne together!" Nyx shouted at the retreating colt.
"I'm sorry, it's an irrational phobia! I can't handle this at all!"
"Mom, you're kinda scaring my friends," Twilight said honestly, looking at Shining and Spike to join her, which they did while grabbing their significant others. Nyx dragged Lemon back as Twilight turned to her mother again. "We won't leave you but please, we don't want to hurt you either. You need to let go of the nightmare force. You've got a granddaughter here to spoil rotten and her coltfriend to scare."
Nyx glared at her mom for but stepped forwards with wing tightly around Lemon. "I'm dying to hear all the stories about mama, like how she got stuck in the cookie jar-"
"You told her that?!" Twilight shrieked, glaring at Shining and Spike, with everypony laughing, the Nightmare included.
"Mom," Cadence smiled with Rarity, both of them nodding their heads. "We have so many stories to share with you, about your precious foals and what they've done."
"Please," Rarity reached over and hugged Nightmare Velvet, the rest of the family joining her. "Please come back to us."
As the extended family hugged their matriarch, soon a giggling, crying happy mare under a pile of her loved ones.
145.4 (fractalman)
After a prank involving poison joke and heart's desire backfired, Zecora found herself in a swamp. After spending a few moments failing to identify the local flora, she concluded she wasn't anywhere on Equus.
She sighed, and set to building herself a shelter for the long haul, which included planting some seeds from her Pocket.
Yoda blinked as he beheld the zebra. He blinked again as he realized the zebra was stirring a pot. He blinked a third time as he realized it smelled really, really good.
"Teach me how to make that, will you?"
Zecora chuckled. It was just simple bean soup, though the bean was not native to the planet.
"Master Yoda, small and green
let me teach you about this bean"
"Good at plants, are you? Perhaps teach each other, we will."
"To learn a little something of the force
What can I say but 'of course'?"
145.5 (AnonymousAsk, fractalman)
Twilight was in the town hall waiting for Nightmare Moon, trying to decide between throwing water balloons at her until she surrendered, or challenging her to a magic duel.
As she was thinking, she looked around and noticed that Fluttershy was not around. Just then Nightmare Moon appeared and began to talk, but just before Twilight could decide, a very familiar manticore appeared.
"What?" Asked Twilight and Nightmare Moon as every head looked to the manticore.
The Manticore looked around and all the ponies except Twilight, her friends, and Nightmare Moon began to run; shortly afterwards, Applejack grabbed Rainbow Dash by the tail and dragged her out, Rarity fainted in her couch, and Pinkie smiled and jumped around like nothing was happening. Twilight noticed Nightmare moon’s horn beginning to glow, so she readied a shield spell to protect her friends. Just as she was about to complete the spell, she heard a voice.
"Sebastian! There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you!" Said Fluttershy, appearing from behind the manticore and hugging him.
Nightmare Moon’s spell stopped as she was surprised by the unexpected apparition of the yellow pegasus and how she was hugging the manticore.
"Fluttershy? How did that manticore get here, and why were you looking for him?" Asked Twilight
"Oh, eheh...it's just that almost every loop, poor Sebastian ends up with a spine in his paw so I was going to let him stay in my hut tonight, but then Angel Bunny began to throw a tantrum and before I knew it, Sebastian was gone..." explained Fluttershy.
"Umm... Hello? Dark Alicorn returned from banishment after a thousand years? Yoohoo!" said Nightmare Moon, but neither Twilight or Fluttershy seemed to notice her.
"Well...it was good of you Fluttershy, but you could at last give me a warning next time." Said Twilight.
"Of course. Now, Sebastian, say sorry to Twilight and to Nightmare Moon for disturbing them." Said Fluttershy to the manticore.
The manticore made a puppy face, then pounced Nightmare moon and began to lick her mane, to her utter befuddlement.
"There, that's better. Miss Moon you can continue." Smiled Fluttershy nodding her head.
"Well...I...I forgot where I was..." Commented Nightmare Moon, a little confused and grossed out, as she tried to pry the oversized kitty away.
"I think this is the moment you realize that a bunch of ponies just stayed up all night, and so you don’t need to bring about eternal night to make them appreciate it." Said Twilight.
"It is...? I don't really remember that being part of the plan, but if you could please call off your manticore..."
145.6 (RowanEx)
Twilight took a peek on a video which caused other Loopers to snigger or chortle, and to her surprise, it was quite one of the embarrassing but cute moments in the baseline.
What bothered her however, how in Yggdrasil did they get the time to record that small video?! Did a Guest Looper went with her 6-Looper-Stealth Loop which also was last loop and decided to spread a joke?
Or the CMC was actually Awake that time except for Nyx and decided to snoop for it... Impossible. It must've been someone else.
Rarity noticed Twilight locking herself in the library for quite a time ever since she Woke up for this Loop, and decided to take a peek of what she has been doing. Once she got to a window, her eyes were probably deceiving her, or not. She then proceeded not to laugh as she walked back home.
"That expansion sure did mess her up," she said on her mind, "especially for the Pancake Princess!"
Rarity froze for a second before bursting into laughter.
Nyx played the video on her PADD.
Twilight cuddled the pancakes before suddenly a loud noise woke her up.
'I'm pancake!' she turned back into the group while raising a pancake stuck in her horn, 'I mean, awake.'
A few sniggers were heard, causing Twilight to head towards a window and took a peek outside, only to see nothing. She turned back to the other five who were trying not to burst into laughter.
'Don't tell anypony about this,' she warned."
Nyx blinked once, stared back at Twilight, blinked twice, then proceeded to laugh much to Twilight's disappointment.
145.7 (Anon e Mouse Jr.)
"Twilight?"
The purple unicorn heaved a sigh. "Yes, Rarity?"
"Have you ever had any loops where the Cakes ran a waffle restaurant rather than a bakery before?"
"Ee-nope." Twilight looked around. "This is the first time that I know of. I'm not complaining though, they're actually very good at it. Even with the more... out there dishes."
"Quite." Rarity took a bite of her daisy-and-waffle sandwich. "Mmm. We'll have to ask Pinkie how their baseline selves are with them next time we see her Awake."
"I'll make a note of it." Twilight pulled her PADD out of her pocket. "I've been meaning to ask her about all the different versions of Sugarcube Corner she knows of anyway."
"Part of your general research on loop variations?"
"To quote Big Macintosh, eeyup."
145.8 (Filraen)
When Diamond Tiara Awoke she didn't realize it. Her world was a sea of perceptions she couldn't understand because, while conscious, she couldn't process any of them. Light? Touch? Sound? Magic? She didn't understand those concepts, or how she needed to understand them.
She also never realized when she lost consciousness.
As time passed Diamond Tiara started getting some flashes of... something, a comforting sound that she knew by heart.
"...ra."
It took time, how much Tiara didn't know, to understand they were voices and what the voices sometimes were saying was her own name. But the effort she spent to get this realization was too much and she fell into unconsciousness again.
'In the middle of nowhere, having the impression of being Awake for some time but no loop memories. What the pine is happening here? Maybe if I had a landmark or something...'
Suddenly a yellow road appeared below her, whatever direction was below right now.
'Well, that's convenient.' Tiara thought but when she tried to stand on the road she realized she didn't have hooves. Or hands, claws, tentacles, flippers... or a body for that matter.
Then she had a realization 'Wait, am I dreaming or something? Only one way to find out.' Trying to focus on Zecora's lucid dreaming techniques Diamond Tiara created her usual earth pony form, then changed to human, dragon, changeling, zombie and her surprisingly often used lately boxing kangaroo form before becoming her usual filly form again.
Testing her magic Diamond Tiara realized she had a little bit, but her connection to it was muted somehow (or she had low reserves right now, she could be in a coma) and her Element of Generosity reacted the same way. With her options cut off, unable to ping and not knowing if she were going to remember this dream once she wakes up Diamond Tiara decided to meditate and prepare her mind to when this dream ends.
Light.
Sun.
Hungry.
Voice.
Name.
Taste.
Voice.
Light.
Voice.
Name.
Voice.
Voice.
Voice...
"...doctor..."
Worry!
Diamond Tiara suddenly recognized the voice, and knew exactly what to do. Pushing her magic as far as she could do Diamond Tiara called the Element of Generosity upon her.
Honeybuzz knew there were good and bad days, and she had to enjoy the good to make the most of them while suffering the bad. She had married a wonderful pony of a husband, had their little foal together, an earth pony like herself, and enjoyed their time together. She only hoped she could get out more with her daughter to play, but today was one of those lucky days. She even caught up with her bee friend at the park.
They had already returned home however, as it was getting late and the cold wasn't good for either of them. Now they were both resting on top of the bed waiting for her husband's arrival. She didn't have to wait much as soon enough there were sounds of him arriving to the house.
"Darling, I'm back!" Filthy Rich said as he entered the bedroom.
"Welcome home, Dear." After kissing each other Honeybuzz continued. "How was your day?"
"Good enough. We finished polishing the details for the next harvest production of Zap Apple jam with the Apples. And yours?"
"Not that bad all things considered. I managed to get outside to play with Tiara after lunch and after that it looked like she was hungrier than ever, I just finished nursing her." She didn't mention how she almost never got out of their home, and not for the lack of will. Her body had become tired even since she gave birth to their daughter, nights sleeping never becoming restful again, to the point Honeybuzz almost never had the strength to leave home.
Filthy Rich knew all of that and more, like the other reason his wife had to leave home today. "And what did the doctor say?"
"Doctor Stable gave me three months left" to die, was left unsaid but both understood it. Silenced reigned for a moment until the dam broke.
"Rich, what I'm going to do?!" Honeybuzz cried as she threw herself into Filthy Rich's embrace. "I want to go with you to leave Tiara to school her first day! I want to be in her cute-ceañera telling her friends their music it too loud! I want to be in her wedding! I want to grow old with you..."
"I'll tell her stories of the wonderful mare who is her mother," Filthy Rich eventually said. "I'll make sure she won't ever forget-"
His words were interrupted by two things happening at the same time, or maybe one which had two effects. A sudden sphere of light took up most of the room, creating winds which made all the knick-knacks in the room flutter around, surprising Filthy Rich and Honeybuzz enough to fall towards the wall.
Eventually the light and winds ended, and in its place the translucent image of a filly remained, wings flaring as if helping to keep balance on her four legs, horn lit. The alicorn -an alicorn!- seemed to be around the age one usually gets their cutie mark. Her eyes were looking carefully around the room: the walls, the bed, Filthy Rich to finally fixing her sight down on Honeybuzz, who was still on the floor with her back to the wall, before saying a single phrase.
"I ask of you: are you my Mother?"
Time seemed to stop until Rich finally spoke "D-diamond Tiara, is that you?"
"Yes, dad. It's me, your daughter." The alicorn said as she softened her face into a smile and used her head to point to the bed, where even after the whole lights and wind act the small form of Diamond Tiara was in her bed, and with that a ton of revelations that were being screamed at Honeybuzz were realized.
Both her daughter on the bed and the translucent alicorn had same coat and mane color.
Diamond Tiara had sprouted wings and a horn much like the translucent figure possessed.
Both had the same position: wings flared, horn lit with the same magic color.
Both had a necklace, her little foal was using it to look like she was standing on her four hooves on the bed and the standing alicorn was wearing it.
Everything coming together to the realization of the translucent alicorn looked unmistakably like and an older version of Diamond Tiara.
"But how?" Honeybuzz asked as she approached her filly on the bed.
"Wait, Mom!" Diamond Tiara said, halting Honeybuzz's approach. At her surprised look the alicorn elaborated: "I'm concentrating really hard for this spell and I don't want to disrupt it. But as of how, it's a really long story but the short version is that I really wanted to get to know you Mom."
Torn between going to her daughter but being unable lest she stop talking with her Honeybuzz could only have tears fall down her face. "Thanks to let me know you before I-"
Diamond Tiara interrupted her mother with a single phrase, "I know," and then closed her eyes as if concentrating. The image of the alicorn flickered from a moment, raising Honeybuzz's fear before stopping and opening her eyes again.
Filthy Rich, however, noticed something extra had happened. He grasped one of the three bottles that suddenly appeared on the bed, it had a big number one on its side. "What are these?"
"Those are three potions, containers of powerful spells, Dad." Tiara answering almost in a lecturing tone... which Honeybuzz supposed was appropriate for the situation. "Mom, you should drink them in order: the bottle with a number one has a potion of Remove Curse, which should work with almost all magical maladies. The potion in the bottle number two has a powerful Remove Disease spell which is good for non-magical diseases. The bottle number three has a potion to Cure Serious Wounds, either by injury or disease."
The explanation seemed to make Honeybuzz stop breathing. Could she... be healed?
At her stunned look Diamond Tiara blushed and looked at the floor sheepishly, "I wanted to be thorough."
Honeybuzz couldn't hold it any more she stood and ran towards her grown-up child's embrace, only to pass through her and fall to the floor.
"Sorry about that Mom, but this is only an illusion. It helps with my focus but I'm really on the bed."
Maybe it was the happiness of talking to her foal, maybe the absurdity of Diamond Tiara suddenly becoming an alicorn, or the hope that she could stay alive long enough to get to know her daughter. But now being on the floor, after foolishly passing through a ghostly image of her foal, was too much for Honeybuzz.
She started laughing.
Laughter and tears of relief and happiness and hope and love of an inexplicable miracle that had happened in her own bedroom, a miracle that may just allow her to enjoy the two most precious treasures she had in her life. A moment later three more laughs sang along with hers.
Eventually the laughter stopped and Honeybuzz returned to Filthy Rich's side, as the illusory image apparently couldn't move.
"Mom, Dad, I can't keep the spell for much longer."
"Will you be all right, my princess?"
"Yes Dad," Diamond Tiara answered as her image flickered. "I'm not sure how conscious I'll be after I end the spell but I'll certainly remember this. And if not, please show me the bottles."
Filthy Rich nodded.
"Mom, Dad, when I can cast the spell again or can talk normally I promise to tell you my story. But I want you to wait for me, both of you."
Honeybuzz answered with a conviction she forgot the last time she felt "We promise."
A relieved smile crossed Diamond Tiara's face and her image was no more; however, just after the image vanished they could hear her voice sheepishly saying one last thing.
"... and sorry for the bedroom."
And then everything ended, this time without any wind or lights. Only with a little alicorn foal sleeping in the middle of the bed hugging a necklace too big for her.
145.9 (AnonymousAsk, RowanEx)
Twilight Sparkle and Spike looked around the sea of red stones then at each other.
"What?" Twilight asked.
"Nothing," commented Spike, "it's just that sooner or later Luna might do this, and thank Yggdrasil we're not in the sun."
"How did you know it was going to end like this?" the mare asked.
"Of course, it was going to happen sometime," commented Spike as he looked up to Twilight, "We used the send to the moon joke way too many times on almost everybody. It's surprising Luna lasted that long. Even Celestia suggested to stop swearing by her name."
"Well, true, but-"
"No buts, next time, let's send things somewhere else," he interrupted.
"Okay," Twilight replied, "so what are we gonna do now here in Mars to pass the time?"
Spike thought for a few seconds before an idea entered his mind. "How about a colony?"
Twilight looked around before nodding in agreement.
145.10 (Masterweaver)
"PANCAKE DISCUS?! CELESTIA, WHY IS THIS ON THE LIST OF EQUESTRIAN GAMES?!?!"
"Well, it's not like we haven't done anything ridiculous before, Twilight. Wife tossing is almost a regular sport now."
"AAAARAAARARRAARARARARARAAAGH!"
"Luna overturned solar surfing, though. Something about a lack of viable competitors. Such a shame, really."
145.11 (Masterweaver)
Twilight felt the spiked collar on her neck as she looked into the mirror. "Huh, this manestyle again..." She adjusted her denim jacket and walked out to her motorcycle.
Whose tires were made of pancakes.
"...you know what, I'm just going to roll with it."
"Well said, my faithful student!" Discord rolled up on another pancake-tired motorcycle, peering over a pair of kamina shades. "Now come, the Waffle Twins are returning from space tonight!"
145.12 (Evilhumour)
Lyra leaned her head against the bar and sighed.
"Something strong, please, we've got a roaring headache from our last loop stuck in our head." the looper with yellow eyes looked up at Big Mac. "This is Seapony Lyra speaking to you so you know when I am saying the last loop was crazy."
Big Mac raised an eyebrow but before he asked, the pony in front of him picked the glass up and continued to speak.
"We were seaponies and we were the second most insane thing in the ocean!" Lyra dropped the glass onto the counter, shuddering. "Those damn Narwhals out sung us, out fire powered us, out insaned us, out seaponyed us!" Lyra quivered. "It was horrible and we cannot get their damn song out of our head!"
With a thud and splash, the pony in the bucket fell onto her back with Big Mac blinking his eyes in shock. It seemed that there was something that could make a seapony say it was too crazy now and he wasn't sure how to take it.
Picking up Lyra's drink and throwing it back, he decided that it was certainly not going to be taken soberly.
145.13 (Evilhumour with the help of Purrs)
Zecora smiled to herself as she prepared to welcome the anchor to Equestria. She had been planning this for a while now, and she wanted to see how he would take their version of his holiday. Clearing her throat, she directed Cheerilee and her students into their appropriately decorated town and began to sing to them all.
"Colts and fillies of every age
Wouldn't you like to see something strange?"
Nyx picked up the tone, flying in as her adult self and landed beside the singing zebra.
"If you have some time to kill
See our town of Ponyville"
From the house they were hiding beside, Diamond Tiara led several foals dressed as pumpkins in the next chant. The anchor's smile was growing by the moment.
"This is Ponyville, this is Ponyville
Ponies laugh in the dead of night"
Luna flew into the town from her moon, the greatest smile on her face as she basked in the adoration the citizens Ponyville were giving her.
"This is Ponyville, everypony knows the drill
Trick or treat till the neighbors gonna die of fright
It's our town, everypony laugh
In this town of Ponyville"
Vinyl trotted onto the scene, shaking her mane in her elaborate costume to the utter delight of the stallion beside them.
"I am the one hiding under your bed
Teeth ground sharp and eyes glowing red"
Flashing a wink, Vinyl joined their growing group as Lyra appeared in her human costume.
"I am the one outside the windowpane
Fingers like snakes and spiders in my mane"
All of the ponies gathered so far broke out in a joint song of "This is Ponyville, this is Ponyville"
Flying in as a pegasus, Sunset flashed her sharp fangs as she sang her part of their song.
"Ponyville! Ponyville! Ponyville! Ponyville!
In this town we call home
Everypony hail to the librarian song"
Ivory Scroll walked onto the scene with a fantastic costume that made it appear she had two faces on her head.
"In this town, don't we love it now?
Everybody's waiting for the next surprise"
Everyone, even their visitor and the non looping ponies, sung the next part with pride in their voices.
"Round that corner, Pinkie hiding in the trash can
Something's waiting now to pounce, and how you'll..."
Rarity, Applejack and Fluttershy jumped out of the Carousel Boutique, singing loudly to the eternal delight of their friends. The first was wearing something quite risqué, the second was a quite realistic timberwolf, and the third was using her druid powers to make it seem as if she were melting.
"Scream!
This is Ponyville
Red 'n' black, slimy green"
Applejack leaned into the foals around Cheerilee, snarling softly to get them laughing in playful fright.
"Aren't ya scared?"
Flying in with their own weird magic, Discord and Silver Spoon caused a bit of draconequus magic to fall around them all.
"Well, that's just fine
Say it once, say it twice
Take a chance and roll the dice
Ride with the moon in the dead of night.
Spike, changed into a skeleton form for this event sang his lines in a mighty tone:
"Don't you feel the chill? Don't you feel the chill?"
Berry Punch, a hoof around her daughter, fulfilled her part.
"In our town of Ponyville!"
Pinkie Pie, dressed to the nines, bounced her way to their visitor, her smile greater then the one painted on her face.
"I am the clown with the tear-away face
Here in a flash and gone without a trace"
A very large red ghoul pony showed off his pipes on the condition that no one would ever tape this.
"I am the fear in the back of your brain
I am the wind blowing through your mane"
An alicorn mare flew across the moon, doing what little singing she needed to do.
"I am the shadow on the moon at night
Filling your dreams to the brim with fright"
With that, Celestia, dressed Nightmare Moon, flew off before her voice would crack.
Everyone followed the zebra alicorn with joy and wonder as she led them deeper into the town.
"This is Ponyville, this is Ponyville
Ponyville! Ponyville! Ponyville! Ponyville!
Ponyville! Ponyville!"
The three founders of the Cutie Mark Crusaders bounded onto the scene, their smiles meeting all of the other ponies' save their visitor.
"Tender lumplings everywhere
Life's no fun without a good scare"
The Empress of the Crystal Empire and her Royal consort, both dressed as corpses and their legs around each other, chimed in.
"That's our part-time job, but we're not evil
In our town of Ponyville"
Rainbow Dash unleashed her own singing as they neared the imposing tree in the center of the town.
"In this town"
Ivory did not miss her cue from the pony dressed up as the grim reaper, replying with
"Don't we love it now?
Everybody's waiting for the next surprise"
All of the present mane six, started to sing together, side by side.
"Twilight Sparkle might catch you reading a book
And scream like a banshee
Make you jump out of your skin
This is Ponyville, don't you feel the chill?
Won't you please make way for a very special mare?
Our mare Twilight is Queen of Golden Oaks
Everyone hail to the Bookworm Queen now!"
Everyone broke out into song in perfect unison, heads pointed to the full moon above them. A pony exploded out from the foliage of the Golden Oaks Library, flying around in the air as the crow reached its climax.
"This is Ponyville, this is Ponyville
Ponyville! Ponyville! Ponyville! Ponyville!"
Applebloom, Scootaloo and Sweetie Bell sang as Twilight landed in front of the entire town, wings bent low before she stood up in front of their special guest.
"In this town we call home
Everyone hail to the friendship song!"
With that, there was a shout of joy and thunderous applause, none louder than from Pumpkin King himself.
145.14 (Tangent)
By Any Other Name: 1.1 The Awakening
Twilight Sparkle Awoke suddenly amidst the hustle and bustle of a crowded kitchen full of ponies, only two of which she immediately recognized as Mr. and Mrs. Cake. Which made sense, as from what she could tell, she was in the large kitchen of Sugarcube Corner.
"What's up, Pancake? Are you okay?" One of the extra ponies asked in a concerned tone. And then the memories hit. This was yet another name error loop, this time replacing her entire name with Pancake. Only this time her name actually made sense within the context of the loop itself! As Pancake, she was the youngest of four sisters, the other three being Flapjack, Waffle, and Syrup, who ran a semi-mobile restaurant catering to lumberjacks and miners. She herself had set out on her own years ago to get out of her sisters' shadow and had ended up in Ponyville, staying with the Cakes.
"I'm fine, Waffle," Twilight replied. "I'm just glad you three could come help with the Summer Sun Celebration. Plus, it'll be nice having a family visit once all the hubbub is done and over with." A quick ping brought back a pair of returns. Magic and Loyalty... Spike and Trixie would be her guess, it made most sense. Apparently Trixie was taking her place as Princess... Dawn de Lumière?
Huh...
Interesting, apparently Twilight wasn't the only one with an alternative name this loop. Princess Dawn de Lumière was how Princess Celestia was known this time around, with the only other difference according to her new memories being the bright golden half-sun Cutie Mark. And Trixie was most likely taking Twilight's place as her student, with Spike as her assistant.
"Okay, that's the second time this morning you've spaced out, Pancake," Flapjack stated drily. "I know you want to impress us with how successful you've been in Ponyville, but you've been running yourself ragged ever since you got the spot as Head Caterer for the Summer Sun Celebration. Take a break. Go see your friends. As much as we missed you, we don't want to see you back in the kitchen for another hour, okay?"
"Aheh-heh," Twilight laughed nervously. "Okay, okay, I'll take a break! Be back in a bit!" And with that, the Anchor currently known as Pancake headed out of Sugarcube Corner...
145.15 (Kris Overstreet)
Fluttershy looked up, and up, and up at the anorexic-looking armor-plated quadrupedal giant robot... thing. Similar robots rested in giant containment bays to either side, different mainly in color; brilliant white armor on the left, darkest blue in the middle, vibrant pink on the right.
"This is Alicornion Unit One," declared the stallion who had replaced her father for the Loop. "We created the Alicornions to defend Canterlot-3 against the threat of the Nightmares, as foretold in the Ghastly Gorge Scrolls."
"Er... that's nice," Fluttershy said hesitantly, "but why show this to me?" She waved a hoof up and down at the midnight-blue titan half-submerged in the holding tank next to them.
"Because you are the Fifth Element," Dark Clouds said firmly. "Only those who are Elements can pilot an Alicornion. And you are going to pilot Unit One into battle against the Fourth Nightmare."
"Into battle? Oh, no, no I couldn't!" Fluttershy insisted. In fact she could and she had, much more often than she cared to remember, but she didn't care to admit it given any option. She never enjoyed it... well, hardly ever.
"If you refuse to pilot Unit One," Dark Clouds growled, "I will have no choice but to send the First Element into battle." He pointed to a hospital gurney, where a pony almost completely swathed in bandages, gauze and plaster casts lay almost motionless. A single tangle of pink mane stuck out from a gap in the wrappings.
"Let me at 'em!" Pinkie Pie said, trying to sit up, then falling back onto the gurney with a groan of pain.
Fluttershy gave Dark Clouds a capital-L Look that was more than halfway to the capital-S Stare. "I refuse to respond to your emotional blackmail," she said. "I will not pilot Alicornion."
"Fluttershy, you suck," Dark Clouds said. "Now get in the robot."
Fluttershy raised an eyebrow. "And how many Loops have you been waiting to unload that one, Gendo?"
"Dark Clouds," alias Gendo Ikari, smirked. "Who says I've been waiting?" he asked. "This is my first time with pony pilots, though."
"Besides," said Pinkie Pie from her gurney, "it had to be you, right? If we'd chosen Rainbow Dash, she'd have said yes before Gendo could tell her the unit number of the robot!"
145.14 b
(Tangent)
By Any Other Name: 1.2 Moon Pie Madness
Twilight Sparkle (or Pancake, as she was known in this loop) had barely set out from Sugarcube Corner when she was accosted by a panicking pink pony her in-loop memories identified as Moon Pie, an Earth Pony with long straight hair. Moon Pie had always been fascinated by the moon and the night sky, and had left the Pie family rock farm years ago to pursue her education after she got her Cutie Mark, a full moon surrounded by five stars. She had recently graduated and had been stationed at Ponyville's Golden Oak Observatory, where she slept through most of the day and spent most nights gazing at the stars.
Pancake was one of the few Ponyville residents to keep in touch with her after Skittles (oh, Twilight was so going to tease Rainbow Dash about that one after all those Pancake jokes!), Ponyville's Premier Party Planner, hosted Moon Pie's Welcome to Ponyville party last year. Moon Pie, for her part, always welcomed any of her friends who came to visit with a warm smile and a pot of tea, inexplicably showed up at the door bearing a bowl of herbal broth if any of her friends was feeling under the weather, and tried to attend any event important to her friends if she possibly could. It was odd to know a version of Pinkie Pie with so few friends, but all the same rather heartening that Moon Pie valued those few friendships so dearly.
"Pancake!" Moon Pie yelled in Twilight's ear as she shook the purple pony. "I know you're super busy, but can you help me? Please?"
"Calm down, Moon Pie. What seems to be the problem?"
Letting go of Pancake, Moon Pie took a few deep breaths as she tried to settle her nerves. "I was just finishing up my research notes this morning when the mailpony came with a royal notice - Eventide Twinkle, Princess Dawn de Lumière's personal student, is coming to Ponyville tomorrow to inspect the preparations! She's going to be staying at my observatory! I don't have any spare rooms set up! What if she's a meanie? What if she kicks me out of my own observatory? I heard she has a dragon! Dragons eat gems and crystals! What if he eats my lenses!? I don't wanna pay to replace my lenses again! Whaaaaaaa-aaaaa-aa-aahhhh!"
"There there, Moonie," Twilight patted Moon Pie's mane as she soothed the panicking pink pony. "I only have an hour free this morning, but I can drop by this evening to lend a hoof. In the meantime, why don't I help you find Skittles, Gemstone, and Apple Cider? I seem to remember that they didn't get any specific assignments for the Summer Sun Celebration preparations. I'm positive that at least one of them will be free to help you out."
Moon Pie sniffed and smiled tentatively. "Do you really think so, Pancake?"
"I'm positive," Twilight nodded with a reassuring smile. "And even if they are busy, I'll still be by this evening to help out. It shouldn't be too hard to clear out a room or two and set up guest rooms."
"Thank you so much, Pancake!"
145.16(Masterweaver)
Nyx walked up to her friend and put a hoof on her shoulder. "Apple Bloom, normally I don't go into other looper's dreams without permission. But the last expansion got me curious, and I headed into your unawake self's head."
Apple Bloom paused, giving the alicorn an odd look. "...Yeah?"
"You. Are one. Screwed up filly, you know that?"
The earth pony frowned. "Okay, what happened?"
"I'll give you the memory tonight, don't you worry." Nyx patted her gently and walked on. "Right now, though, I need to get your brother to open his bar."
"Oh come on," Apple Bloom cried, "it couldn't have been that weird! You've got to have seen stranger things than... whatever you saw!"
"There was this time Pinkie was stealthing and I dreamskipped into her head," Nyx muttered. "Took me five loops and three targeted obliviations to regain my sanity. This, though, I need a drink for." She gave Apple Bloom a look. "Let me repeat that: I survived a looping Pinkie Dream, and I need a drink for this."
145.17 (Masterweaver)
"So wait, she's a... hairdresser?"
Apple Bloom nodded. "Yep, here it is, black and white." She handed the letter over to Scootaloo. "Babs has apprenticed under a master barber."
"...huh." The pegasus checked both sides of the paper. "You know, I know we don't pay as much attention to her as we should in these loops, but... She never struck me as a mane stylist, ya'know? Not that I think she'll be a bad one," she quickly reassured, "it's just that... I dunno, she felt a little rough-and-tumble, if that makes sense."
"Surprised me too, first time I went through this expansion." Apple Bloom shrugged. "Meh, if it makes her happy, Ah don't really care. Point is, we should celebrate."
Sweetie Belle walked in at that moment, glancing furtively behind her. "Sorry, I just had to shake off Snips--I don't know why, but he has a real hard crush on me this loop!" She mock gagged. "I know he can be a decent guy, but I'm just not interested... what are you two staring at me for?"
Apple Bloom cleared her throat. "Sweetie Belle.... what is Snips' special talent anyway?"
145.18 (Masterweaver)
The two cuttlefish stared each other down.
Around them, four other cuttlefish (and one purple sea cucumber) shuffled awkwardly.
The currents of the water around them filled with tension.
Eventually the cucumber coughed, or did something resembling a cough. "Girls... it is traditional, it's best if you get it out sooner rather than later--"
He backed off at the matching glare. "Right, sorry. I'll just be over here."
The purple cuttlefish snorted, turning back to the white one.
Streaks of sunlight filtered through the ocean.
Finally, the white cuttlefish sighed. "...Twilight?"
"....Yes, Rarity?"
145.19 (Original concept by AnonymousAsk; beta-read and revised by Anon e Mouse Jr.)
Something isn't right.
Twilight looked up at the empty stage for the Summer Sun Celebration. She and most of the other resident Loopers had gathered there in plenty of time for Nightmare Moon's arrival. Except it had been over half an hour since the corrupted alicorn was supposed to show up, and she simply was. Not. There.
And all the pings she'd felt had been accounted for by ponies she'd already confirmed were present. This was concerning.
"Twilight?"
"Yes, Ivory?"
"Do you… know if they're planning something?" The mayor looked as concerned as Twilight herself.
Twilight shook her head. "If they are, they didn't tell me."
Nearby, a loud belch suddenly interrupted. "Ugh… excuse me." Spike looked embarrassed. "Twilight, mail for you!"
"Thank you, Spike. Hmm… what? She WHAT! Tree-damn it!" Twilight groaned.
"Darling? What is it?" Rarity looked at her in shock.
"Here. Read this." Twilight passed the letter to her.
"Oh… my." Rarity began reading aloud.
My dearest student Twilight Sparkle,
Luna and I have decided to take a vacation loop. Please don't search for us, we'll be perfectly fine.
Signed,
Princess Celestia
P.S: I leave Equestria's leadership in your capable hooves while we're away.
Twilight looked at her friends.
"Errr... Any of you want to... help me?"
"Sorry Darling, Spike and I have a little date in Trottingham, maybe another time." Rarity truly looked apologetic as she and Spike hurried away.
"And I've got... farm work to do," Applejack added as she backed up.
Twilight looked to the others.
"Gilda told me she was going to give me a tour around the Griffon Kingdom," said Rainbow Dash.
"I did? OW!" The griffon looked indignant. "Sheesh, Dash, that hurt! What'd you do, get steel elbow implants?" Suddenly realizing that eyes were on her, she grimaced. "And yeah, I did, so we need to go." She and Dash flew off.
Twilight looked around again. "And... everypony else took off when I wasn't looking. Guess it's just the four of us, girls." She looked rather expectantly at the three Crusaders.
"Sorry, Twilight. We... really don't know how to run a government." Sweetie Belle spoke.
"And we have a big crusade we need to get to," Scootaloo added.
"So... bye." Apple Bloom looked more than a little embarrassed as she backed away from her fellow Element of Magic.
The three hurriedly left, leaving Twilight to sigh.
"So much for the magic of friendship THIS loop," the lavender unicorn muttered. "Especially since they did such a good job running Equestria during my self-imposed exile the last few times I left them in charge. Oh well. Time for backup plan H."
Half an hour, Twilight and a confused white alicorn were standing in the courtyard of Canterlot Castle.
"Er... Twilight Sparkle, you said your name was? Where are we, and why are we unicorns? Well, winged unicorn, in my case."
Twilight smiled. "Welcome to your new kingdom, Principal Celestia. It's not too different from running Canterlot High, just country-sized, so... have fun!" With that, Twilight teleported out, leaving a still very confused neo-alicorn by herself.
Meanwhile, back in Canterlot High...
Vice-Principal Luna looked just as confused as her sister, even if she was a world away. "Sunset Shimmer? Wasn't my sister in her office a few minutes ago?"
"Yes, but she had to leave. Something about an emergency only she could handle, and that you're in charge until she gets back."
"Oh. Well... why were you here?"
"Mr. Cranky Doodle asked me to deliver the morning's attendance records for him."
"Ah. Well, thank you, and I suppose you'd better get back to class then."
Sunset nodded, then sighed after she left. "Twilight, if you're going to pull something like this, I wish you'd at least give me more than two or three seconds' warning."
145.20 (Evilhumour, gamerex27, and masterweaver)
"-and one, two three, and one, two, three," the woman's voice cut into Vinyl's mind as she Woke up with a jolt, nearly falling on her face. "Miss Melody, are you alright?" the woman asked to the snickering of other girls around her.
"Ye-yeah," she blinked as she pushed herself up with her hands, sending out a ping while she waited for her loop memories to kick in. "Peachy." she gulped as she looked to her right to a very uncomfortable sight.
It was herself in those black slim tights that showed her legs off too much, with a top that pushed her chest in places she wasn't comfortable being so high and she was wearing ballet shoes. The final nail of how totally unwubural loop was going to be was her hair; brushed, washed and groomed to perfection, the natural blue mess was in a ponytail!
"Good, Victoria, we wouldn't want our lead girl to hurt herself before the recital, now would we?" the woman smiled at the girls around her. "Now let's continue, shall we?" Tapping her pointer against the wall, the teacher began to call out, "And one, two, three..."
Vinyl nearly jumped out of her skin as the girls began to join her at the lunchroom table, all equally unhappy.
"He-hey girls," she weakly waved to them, trying to rub a hand through her hair but it was too well brushed and straight for her to do that. "How are ya-"
Rarity glared at her as she placed down her salad, taking time to be gentle with her very developed muscular hands. "I Woke up while slamming someone into the ground, their feet in my face!" she hissed, squeezing the metal table with worrying ease.
"At least you Woke up to something awesome," the girl next to Rarity muttered, the very picture of feminine beauty with her gorgeous dress and makeup. Her long, rainbow hair was actually glistening in the air and not even her pouting ruined her flawless face. "For once, I don't loop in as a tomboy and I get this!"
"At least y’all got somethin' easy to deal with," the older of the three grumbled. "Ah'm the professor of the high fancy math an’ Ah've got to give a big lecture in thirty minutes and my dang loop memories won't kick in!"
"It could be worse," the fact that Pinkie Pie was smiling at less force than usual was more surprising to the four of them then her suddenly sitting in the middle of them. "I mean, you could be like me; born without the ability to taste food. Although, I think Luna Waking up the electricity factory is bad too. Or the fact that Celestia found out she's the night manager of a fastfood restaurant. Or that Fluttershy is the CEO of a massive hunting company. Or the fact that Twilight is a meany politician that cut the budget to the schools and personally bulldozed the Golden Oaks library. So," Pinkie Pie stood up, all of their food in her arms. "It could be a lot worse. Bye!"
The girls watched her jump off the table and dash off into another room before Vinyl blinked and looked down. "Did she just-"
"Eeyup." the professor muttered darkly.
"Wonderful." the girls sighed, their stomachs grumbling in protest at not being fed.
"Boooooored," Discord moaned, slamming his head against his desk. "So. Booooooored."
"All you have to do is fill out my paperwork and make appointments for me," Twilight grumbled, tearing down the proudly-framed portrait of a smiling, Unawake Twilight at the controls of a bulldozer next to the destroyed, "wasteful" Golden Oaks. "At least you're not stuck in a position where you were doing everything you hate in other people before you Woke Up." Muttering, she changed the channel on her office's TV, going from a proud Unawake Rainbow Dash posing on a fashion show runway to Unawake Rarity in skintight clothing, grinning viciously as she held a scholarship for contact sports at a prestigious local university in one massive hand and a wrestling trophy under her thick, muscular arm in another on the local news interview. "This is like Sleipnir's playing a really bad joke on all of us."
They're all looking at me.Why are they all looking at me?!
Chrysalis broke out in a cold sweat as she Awoke in front of a podium in Canterlot High's auditorium. She glanced down at her speech notes before her, reminding her of her successful acting career, and her motivational speech she was to make to her alma mater. In front of. Thousand. Of. People.
Biting back her screaming changeling instincts to get the buck out of there and hide, she swallowed the lump in her throat and reluctantly began her speech.
It was a little known fact that Derpy Hooves was a workaholic.
Well, Workaholic was a tad extreme. She didn't need to be constantly working, after all. But she didn't react well when she didn't have employment of some sort, even if it was purely voluntary. She needed to do things with her own two hooves, she needed to know she was contributing to society. Even just raising Dinky was enough.
So awakening as a pampered, layabout heiress with parents that deliberately ensured she would be maneuvered away from any sort of work was more than a little stressful.
She could keep herself from destroying things, though. At least until she could contact "auntie Twilight." She could. She just had to breathe calmly and... and not get mad when the butler refilled her lemonade, that was his job after all... she could just lay back and get a tan, like normal rich people, and she could keep her hands from clasping into tight fists as the vague insults of countless loops echoed in the back of her mind reminding her of her weak eyes or broken brain because really those were the exception, not the rule, and she didn't destroy Town Hall as often anyway and she was a mature and fully responsible mare--
...okay, so she had just crushed the lemonade glass. Deep breaths. Focus on something else.
Cadence rubbed her forehead as she ducked the latest thrown chair; grumbling at the stupidity at being a talk show hostess of The Caddy and Maccy Talk Show hour. Signalling to her co-host Big Mac that she was taking five, she moved to get off stage, dimly aware she was leaving Big Mac in a situation where he needed to be talking a fair deal but she did not care. She hated this kind of garbage when they had access to TV; all the relationships ruined at the lies and cheating revealed by the careless hosts and very little done to fix it. Sighing as she stormed into the hallway and into her private dressing room, she flipped on the TV and hoped that there would be something better then being world famous for destroying rela-
Blinking, she saw their was breaking news that an international master thief was reported in the area she was in. Turning her head at a scraping against the floor, she saw a very annoyed Shining Armor looking at her.
"Not. A. Word." he said through clenched teeth as Cadence put the dots together.
Nodding her head, she held her husband close, running her fingers through his hair to calm him down as well as herself.
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Where'd the Twirek go?
Or is that over?
--SYA, The Horse
I'm a serious Homestuck fan, and I just now realize how fucked up the Homestuck loops would be. It's confusing and convoluted enough as is, with all the time travel and CANON retcon powers. We don't need loops within loops looping around loops while half of those loops are being rewritten as quickly as they are made, and then the loops explode into a million other loops, then the whole thing starts looping. Shit is basically flying off the hook. It's like shit wants nothing to do with that hook. The hook filed for divorce from that shit and is now seeking custody of the hook and the shit's two kids.
"asexual." Christ, now complete biological dysfunction has its own special snowflake tumblr sexuality.
Nope. Nightmare Moon asked the same thing, and shortly after, she got Rainbowed.
Neat.
This made me laugh so hard.
Well then, didn't expect that.
Badass Boast. SO MUCH YES!
AWESOME!
Smugjack is best Applejack.
MY SIDES!
Tell that to the millions of shipfics starring you.
You're killing me here!
Agreed.
Good idea.
Yoda and Zecora. Neat.
Sebastian?
Yeah yeah, later.
That is adorable.
Daaw.
Makes sense.
Not surprised.
Yesss!
Doesn't work so well.
Even less.
I guess you could say she's
over the moon.
Riiiight.
With Friends Like These...
OH GOD MY SIDES!
Ah. That explains it.
6053564 Time would look like an 11-dimensional Klein Bottle stuffed inside a Toroid with a Mobius Strip. And that's before any fused loops or other loopers get involved.
6053564 why do you think they safe-mode everyone who comes in contact with SKAIA constructs until they complete a thruough pocket search?
I've been smiling like Pinkie ever since This Is Ponyville. It hurts so good.
6054597
Um, have you even read the time loop series?
FIrst of all, it's perfectly possible for some one to not care for romantic relationships.
2) The time loops make it impossible to have children, and any relationship outside a looper is pretty doomed.
3) since everyone is immortal only sometimes (don't awake, stuck with some one else, shifting dynamics, etc), its hard to keep a constantly changing relationship going, especially considering one may get stuck married to someone else upon waking up.
4) Why marry in the first place? The original purpose was to extend your lineage. That's out the window. After so many millions of years, everyone is basically one, big family (tax breaks are also out, considering how rich everyone can be in a split second). There's really not much point since everyone hangs out with each other on a constant basis, unless you want to make a point, ex. Cadence/Shiny and Rarity/Spike. That's one of the reasons marriages are stupidly rare in the Loops.
More MtG fun,
Also
Get in the Alicornion, Fluttershy. Do it now to save the Pinkie Pie from her fate of having pink hair. And you know- the Nightmares going to take out Canterlot-3 with the power of the First Nightmares- Luna and Celestia. I mean you do get a nice hot springs episode early on, and that DDR dance break with Rainbow Dash and you having some weird sort of romantic love/hate feelings for each other. But then the movies come in and the Problem Student- Sunset Shimmer comes in and goes Berserk Mode on a Nightmare. But Pinkie God is a happy thought to come out of Dark Clouds love of Alicornion Unit 01.
145.1: Always good to explore new diets
145.2: Awesome stuff, but oh god that tortured metaphor (or is
it a simile?)
145.3: Nightmare mother no less XD
145.4: or go omm....neigh
145.5: Kitty drool doesn't help either
145.6: As it should be XD
145.7: always the tasty option
145.8: a true gift
145.9: Let's find martians!
145.10: Solar surfing could be a demonstration event
145.11: Not the Waffle Twins!
145.12: Very unsettling
145.13 Very cute!
145.14: This sounds intriguing...
145.15: Least he's relaxing.
145.16: Hm...intriguing idea, but I've no idea why it would be so weird so it doesn't have enough impact for me >.< Still amusing
145.17: pfft, also the fact her cutie mark looks like human scissors
145.18: ehehehe
145.19: I have to admit i don't get the footnote, but still amusing.
145.20: annd explanations are overrated XD
145.8 is veeery interesting post-Crusaders of the Lost Mark.
In 145.15, is the "Fluttershy, you suck" line a reference to something? It feels like it's supposed to be the point of the snippet, but it means nothing to me beyond the words themselves.
6053564 I think Homestuck may be looping successfully, but they are still incredibly careful what with the Skaia protocol requiring multiple scrubbings of all pockets involved. Remember, the Timey-Wimey shenanigans of Whoverse should have stopped it from looping successfully.
...What...
6672817
Evangelion in 6 words:
"Get in the fucking robot, Shinji."
8271004
Think that is Ganondorf, and he doesn't want Link or Zelda to know. Might also be Big Mac.
This is even funnier considering how season 9 started.
Its gonna be heart breaking when diamond see's how her actual mother behaves
6053564
😐😑😐😑😐… I’m sorry I read that, and now I think I’ve given myself a migraine. I need to go take a swig from my bottle of Liquified Advil now, have a good day!
oh, this reminded me of a silly scene in a story called "the Maretian".
some ponies are marooned on Mars, and one has a dream where Celestia banishes her "to a potato-shaped moon of mars".
when she found out that Mars really HAS such a moon, she looked up a dictionary of swear words on a computer, and yelled EVERY one of them!