The Tale
I Could Just Eat You Up
By OmegaPony11
I hope you understand how brief our love shall be. Know that I feed off love, and for you… well you won’t survive our first and only session.
It has been a long time since I had the company of somepony as delicious as you. Your form is pristine, the texture of your body. Oh, I could just eat you up. But you know I will, and you know you will enjoy every moment of it.
Oh, how rude of me. I forgot to show you around. This is my hive, far away from that cursed Equestria and their pathetic pony princesses. I had it all won, you see. My plan was flawless, the execution impeccable! I even had the very princess of the sun Celestia bound in a cocoon! The power I held was supposed to be mine, and changelings everywhere would have gorged themselves on the love of ponies everywhere!
Give me a moment, please. It is still a sore spot for me, even after all this time. Have you ever been so close to something you desire, only to have it snatched away from you? That is what happened in Equestria. Dominion over the land and its ponies was to be mine, but it all went away in an instant. Alas, I suppose a weak-willed thing like you does not possess the acumen to have a more grandiose purpose in life than to be consumed by me.
Ah, but you should feel honoured. This is going to be greatest moment of your short life, and one which I will treasure as well. I hope you don’t mind, but I am the type that does like to play with her food. The end is meant to pleasurable for my meals, and I find it better if they are in the same mood I am.
Tell me, my delectable little morsel: are you enjoying this? Do you enjoy my hoof trailing down your spine, my eyes meeting your gaze as if we were locked in a trance I can’t… or wouldn’t… escape from? How long have I waited for this moment, when we are both together, alone in my chambers? Are you ready? I certainly am.
Come to me, my darling morsel. Come to me and be mine, even if for a moment. Know that you will nourish your queen with all your love, as you were meant to—
“Uh… Queen Chrysalis.”
Oh of all the… “What? What do you want? I’m in the middle of something! Something important!”
“Right… well, we heard some grumblings from the other changelings about starting another constitutional democracy. They feel you’ve become… a bit obsessive. The fact that every changeling knows about you and your… meal times… makes it a bit hard to defend your rule.”
Excuse me, lovely tasty treat. “Allow me then to show them the error of their ways. Hey! Changeling hordes! Who wants to form a democratic republic, hold regular elections, and have responsible representatives decide on policies that will benefit you all?”
“Uh… I guess I do AHHHHH THE GREEN FIRE BURNS!”
“And don’t you all forget who’s in charge! Now, you two! Get out of here. My mealtime is meant to be private and epic.”
Good. Now we are alone again. Where was I? Oh yes.
I do hope you were put off by that display. Sometimes I have to keep the drones in line. Times are tough after our defeat in Canterlot, and the rumblings are many. I do what I can, but sometimes… sometimes it’s hard. This destiny of being changeling queen was not so much given to me as it was thrust on me, to lead my changelings by example. I get to choose very little, my love. Only these little retreats are what I grant to myself.
Unless I want something more, then I just use a little more green fire. It seems to work.
I can control the temperature of my flames, did you know that? I can create a great inferno that could level cities, to a comfortable little campfire. My heat can also be very… sensual. Would you like to feel the heat, my delectable dinner? I’m sure it would make you simply melt.
How’s that, my dear? Do you like that? Do you enjoy the tongues of my flames stroking you, leaving you nice and toasty? I like having a little heat with my meals. Oh my, you are browning quite nicely. A little tan is tasty for you, my luscious lunch.
Oh! Oh you naughty little thing. You’re leaking already. Do I excite you so readily? I’ll have to clean that up. I suppose it almost time to eat anyways. Don’t worry. It will be a slow, sensual process and you will enjoy every minute of it. I know I will.
How shall we go about this? Shall I lick your sides? Nibble on your ends to excite you before plunging my mouth onto you? To feel my lips on your body, before I feed on your warm delicious love? Oh, how rejuvenated I will be once I am done. I already feel the warmth flowing through my body. You are so warm and tasty right now, I almost can’t resist myself.
This is what I need. I can’t hold off for much longer. I’ll put on some music. Light some candles. Slink my way towards you. Even if our love is fleeting, know that I’ll always cherish what we have. Your love will make me whole.
I want you, I need you, and I simply must have you. No more waiting. No more stalling. I will have you, right now. Are you ready? Here I come.
Mmm… mmm… oh yes… oh… right there… oh… oh you’re delicious… yes, give me all your love… oh the cheddar is just so good, so warm and gooey, and the ham… it’s so heavenly… I need this… I want this… oh… oh my… yes…
I bucking love ham and cheese sandwiches.
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Yet another short inspired by ponychan's /fic/. I hope you enjoy. Thanks go to TiredFoal, Ezn, Ardor, and Grif for their help.
teehee.....
I have to say, I knew it was going to be something like that, but I still laughed myself stupid.
Kinky.
So...
The reader is a ham and cheese sandwich?
???
I guess it's funny in retrospect.
A story to be savored, just like the morsel she is about to enjoy...
That... Was hilarious. Thought it was going to be something dark, but no. HAAAAAAAM.
You had me going, I'll give you that much.
Master troll fic :D
The best part is the call for a change in govt and her response.
she loves to talk to her food that one!
My face for most of the fic
img.ibtimes.com/www/data/images/full/2011/12/09/202524-poker-face.jpg
My face right at the end
stickerish.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/MeGustaBlackSS.png
1681561 rule 34 dude.
So many trolled.
I bucking wish I was a ham and cheese sandwich.
So Chrysalis loves grilled ham and cheese sandwiches too, eh? We share the same tastes then.
This was silly... and also it made me hungry for a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.
So funny.
Alt. Title: Chrysalis Meets The Sandvich
wiki.teamfortress.com/w/images/thumb/9/95/Sandvich.png/250px-Sandvich.png
I can just imagine Chrysalis has let herself go since the wedding and is now hundred of pounds, eating all day, indulging in the only thing that makes her happy. Greenthumbed.
Oh Chrysey, u so sensual.
I was actually starting to blush before I hit that last paragraph.
And then, well.
The facepalm was audible.
All that for a cheese sandwich, huh?
3695412
You ever have that perfect cheese sammich with the melted cheddar and smoked ham and...
Now I'm hungry...
Well foreplay has nothin on samichplay here
Hahahahahaha
1681561 not as kinky as shitting sand into oatmeal then eating it...
4525239 quite
man that comment is 80 weeks old
i feel old
6560221 confusing eh?
A classic example of the rarely seen "food vore" genre.
6560221
The uncut side of the roll, I guess? I don't know.
actually, I thought the ending was just ingeniously hilarious