• Member Since 4th May, 2012
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

NintendoGal55


I'm a Canadian gal who loves to write. :D

T

Rainbow Dash wants to write a love letter to Fluttershy, but has no idea what certain sexual terms mean. When she asks Applejack and Pinkie Pie what they mean, they decide to mess with her by telling her that the words are innocent. Hilarity ensues. But the two Earth ponies know exactly what they're doing...

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 90 )

Reading a TwiJack fic right now....I'll put this in read later :rainbowlaugh:

Well... Don't spoil the whole darn thing in the description. :raritydespair:

1547614

Glad I read this comment first :rainbowwild: Commencing read!!! Will talk later.

1547656 I have since fixed the description. XD

1547614 I do apologize for earlier, but I have fixed it and now hopefully it's better. :twilightsmile:

That was pretty amusing. Cute etc. etc.

And the whole time, it felt like ... hmm ... like when you see someone tell a racist joke in public, and someone of that particular race just happens to be listening nearby.

It's like - *criinnnngge* :fluttershyouch:

Oh... oh God... that... oh God that letter had my crying. CRYING!!! Holy poop I helled myself. :rainbowlaugh:

1547776 Erm...not the best comparison.... But yeah, it is meant to be silly even if you end up cringing a bit. XD That's kind of the point.

1547789 Hee! Glad you liked the letter! XD :rainbowlaugh: It turned out perfectly, I think!

I haven't laughed like that in a long time. Thank you so much for writing this and sharing it. It made my whole week! :rainbowlaugh:

1548036 Awww, I'm glad it made you laugh! Thank you! :twilightsmile:

This fic made me lol, and oh by the way. PLEASE OH CELESTIA PLEASE MAKE A SIDE-STORY THAT EXPLAINS WHAT HAPPENED THAT NIGHT.
iambrony.steeph.tp-radio.de/mlp/gif/89439__UNOPT__safe_princess-luna_animated_laughing.gif

That was just awesome! A lot of fun to read! :pinkiehappy: And that letter... :rainbowlaugh:

I kinda want to know too, Applejack....

This is the first fanfic that legit made me laugh :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:!!!!!!

And of course: your Flutterdash dialogue is friggin' precious :yay::heart::rainbowdetermined2:

1548362 Aww, thank you! :pinkiehappy: I'm glad you had a good laugh out of it!

Precious is what I try to do! :pinkiehappy:

1548128 I understand how you feel. XD But where's the fun in that?! The point is for you guys to wonder what really happened!

But if I ever do make a follow-up, it would be three chapters of the three possible outcomes. Neither one being right or wrong! :raritywink:

Lol this is a nice story:rainbowlaugh:

DAHAHA. XD

What great friends you have Rainbow:rainbowlaugh:

Anyway, I always love a good Flutterdash fic, and this one is definately one of my favorites.

:rainbowhuh:...
:rainbowhuh:...
:rainbowhuh:...
:rainbowhuh:...
:rainbowhuh:...
:rainbowhuh:...
:rainbowkiss:...
:rainbowlaugh:!!!

1549201 what really happend last night form what RD said looks like they didn't have sex or anything close to it

1550101 :rainbowlaugh: That's the point, no one knows. It's all a big guessing game as to whether or not Rainbow Dash is being serious, joking, or is still oblivious.

1550106 Okay love the story its been a while since i've read a comedy. hopefully more flutterdash will come in the future i wonder what if flutterdash were cannon?:trixieshiftright: after much research found a definite maybe

Dang now I really want to know what actually happened.
All I got to say is you write some of the best FlutterDash around, and that letter was possibly one of the funniest things ever. :rainbowlaugh:
I was just glad to see Fluttershy handle it well.

Perfect as it is! I laughed so hard I snorted Diet Coke all over my netbook. Best use of a lunch hour at Burger King in ages. You, NintendoGal55, have a gift for this.

1550389 :rainbowlaugh: So do I! Even I don't know! That's all part of the fun, though. :pinkiehappy:

xD Nah, there are so many writers who do it better than I do. I just have fun with it. But I'm glad you like the letter! A letter being written the way it was, with the sexual terms being misconstrued as innocent terms, was exactly what inspired the story. XD I'm pretty proud with how it turned out!

I like to think that maybe, since Fluttershy likes her too and sexually desires her, and sees that if this is true, she doesn't have to worry. :derpytongue2:

Every time you posted some new story or chapter it is like second Christmas for me : D

1551523 Nope, I haven't! But I guess it's one of those stories that inspires the idea of Dash being oblivious to romance in general or things like that. :rainbowlaugh:

:ajsleepy: Ugh..... I had a good laugh....... but I;m EXTREMELY tired, so goodnight everypony!

And don't forget to keep being a :raritystarry:STAR!:raritystarry:

NintendoGal, you never disappoint! :rainbowlaugh:

Yes Marie Antoinette tended to where big clothes......... Wait........ France and Austria exist on Equis?

Oh goodness...... "'orgasm'. What the hay is an orgasm?!" First thought that popped into my head was "Oh boy..... I can see where this is going....."

Later in the story I read the letter. "OH GOD!" My mouth was open!

Yes this was very funny.

As always, remember to stay :pinkiehappy:GREAT!:pinkiehappy:

Thou art a gentlewoman and a scholar, and a brilliant motherbucker! :rainbowlaugh: This whole thing was just magic and I loved every word of it. :heart:

I just have to assume that Cloudsdale's sex ed program was severely underfunded. XP

That was so freaking hilarious! I couldn't stop laughing..

It's always hard for me to read someone's sexually oblivious writing. I just sigh at first and look away, but I read it and it was really difficult to not laugh. Rainbow, you so silly XD

T'was a good read, thanks.':rainbowlaugh:'

1558319 Why thank you kindly! XDDD I did what I could! Hee hee, yeah, it might be pretty underfunded, all right! :rainbowlaugh: That, or, she skipped those classes or slept through them. XD I guess either interpretation works! But that would be ironic, what with Cloudsdale being a prestigious city, and yet sex education or some elements of the schooling system is underfunded? XD

1557305 Well, not only was the outfit CLEARLY modeled after Marie Antoinette, but the language and culture of French was mentioned a couple of times. XD In exact wording, I might add. So, there must've been a Pony Antoinette and also a Pony France. XD

1569106 Hee! I'm glad you came to enjoy it! X3 We do often find those little exceptions to the rules!

You are going to write a sequel...
RIGHT NOW!

Ok, this one was not my cup of tea. Especially AJ lying about the meanings of the words and not attempting to correct that at all (Did appreciate her holding back on some words though) even if it was in good fun it was toying with a very serious matter and was a decidedly un-nice thing to do considering that she and pinkie knew how important this was to rainbow.
(Friends do not chance shooting down other friends love interests without an ulterior motive or being a fake friend).
In the end it all works out, Atleast until rainbow finds out what those words actually mean then there will be hell to pay.
It was funny to read but i could not really laugh once the lies were set in play.
I really liked the implications and Fluttershy's reaction. But still they were playing with Rainbows future in a very hazardous way. (and that kills the joy in it for me at least)
Serious potential in the hilarity department, but yeah it felt undermined.
Thanks for the story anyways.

1601785 I actually didn't even want to use Applejack in the whole playing around and messing scheme, but somehow is jut worked its way into it. But I might even re-write those bits, since I didn't feel comfortable having AJ lie.

But overall, this isn't meant to be taken seriously, for the most part in a lot of ways. But you do make valid points, to which I honestly do know. But yeah, it was meant to be a silly romp. XD

1601809
I do love the idea of it all and if you do rewrite i will certainly check it out! :twilightsheepish:
But that level of mischief should be clearly a bad zone for pinkie as well. She is a prank master after all and would not risk Rainbow being sad. That or she knows exactly what she is doing (Possibly with the knowledge that Fluttershy like rainbow as well) and being pinkie decides to speed things up to make her and fluttershy happier for it all with some mischief for a bonus. I could see that easily, and it would not be such a hazardous prank if that were to happen. Heck if AJ knew that would be a great reason for her to be in on the prank as well!
Thanks for being willing to talk about it with me though i do appreciate it. :twilightblush:

1601865 Huh! I never thought of it that way. :rainbowhuh: Then again, part of the fun with this story is the interpretation of what happened and what some of the characters are thinking. And that actually makes a lot of sense! Pinkie knows what she's doing, because oh yes, she'd never do anything to hurt her friends on purpose. And because of it and also since AJ knows, she'd play along because she knows nothing bad will come of it...

Well thank you so much! :pinkiehappy: That's a great explanation! I think I'll do a little re-write to implement that a bit more! Thanks a lot! :pinkiehappy::twilightsmile:

And you're welcome too, of course! :yay:

1601898
Fantastic! I am glad i could help! :pinkiehappy: :yay:

Oh Dashie, u so silly.
th05.deviantart.net/fs71/150/i/2012/042/3/3/oh_dashie_by_nintendoes-d4per4h.png
And I know the definition for Bingle Snort! :pinkiehappy: It's that song played with bagpipes and bells! Or, what they call it it win someone snorts in a pattern that descends/ascends in pitch! The vaguely Gangnam Style-esque dance performed in kilts? The meal with turnips, radishes, tomatoes and pork deep-fried and resting in vanilla ice cream with mayonnaise and barbecue sauce on top, sometimes with minimal added champagne? The fashion trend that involves attaching cowbells to your nostrils? ARGH, so many meanings. No wonder Pinkie likes the word. :yay:
Anyway, the hilarious concept, the hilarious execution, and the open-ended question of what happened last night all made this great. The only thing I'd suggest changing is this:

“I figured! All right! Rainbow wrote that down.

Don't forget the quotation mark. :twilightsmile:

I read the letter Rainbow left for Fluttershy. What those two did to Rainbow was horrible and they should feel horrible. I cried many tears, they are horrible ponies! P.S. Write more.:rainbowwild::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof::facehoof:
That was insane! Thousands of kudos to you for doing it so tastefully, you should be proud.:twilightblush:
And when the two hugged in the orchard, I expected one of them to Squee!

This was hilarious! I loved it! :rainbowlaugh::heart::yay:

Oh Celestia...

This was an amazing fic. LOVED the letter! I'm not a Rainbowshy lover, but wow, the description drew me in. Well anyway, here are my two cents on what REALLY happened 'that night':

I get a feeling that Pinkie also pranked Fluttershy the same way she pranked Rainbow Dash. I mean, I guess it doesn't make much sense, considering that the paragraph after the letter implies that Fluttershy DOES know what it means, but still, can't somebody start blushing if somebody just told them that they make that person really REALLY happy?

And also,

"Angel shook his head and grabbed for Fluttershy’s tail frantically. But his efforts were ignored as the creamy yellow mare quickly trotted out the door. Oh no, what had she gotten herself into?! He had to stop this, but how?! Did she not realize that her blue, rainbow-maned friend wanted to molest her?! What was he supposed to do to protect her now?"

Frankly, if Fluttershy was in love with RD for a while, Angel should probably know about her crush, however, this paragraph implies that Angel somewhat recognizes her crush, but is simply just warning her that the letter was very open and sexual and that RD wanted to ... well, molest her.

... Just my two cents. xD
Nevertheless, great story! (:

As I mentioned within my blog I plan to make good use of my regained free time for as long as I have it back and as such it's time to get back to reviewing fanfics. I figured I should start off with a one-shot before I move onto the many chapters of How We Met (I'm not sure if you've read that fanfic but it's a FlutterDash one and I used to do proof-reading for it) and World of Chaos that I have been unable to get around to even reading and then I remembered this story you mentioned. I had in fact read it the moment it came out but had Magnetism to get on with, I still have Magnetism to get on with but now is break time for me and review time for this fanfic which I have now read a second time.

The positive you most want to hear when writing a comedy is that it was funny so :yay: for you because it got me laughing like a lunatic even when I knew what was to happen when reading it a second time. I did not know all the words nor did I know all the references, but character reactions and the general knowledge that said words were risqué still allowed me to laugh as loud as any other truly decent comedy would. The romantic parts of it were very strong as well, and the combination of absurd humour and grounded romance blended well together. Detail and descriptions were above norm and generally it was well written, I don't remember spotting any hiccups in terms of spelling/grammar. Applejack's input keeps her true to herself and believable, and Spike was amazing despite his short time in this story.

Criticism may seem daunting with this review but that is not because a lot to say but because I explain my criticism as well as I can using quotes and highlights... which I hope work for this review otherwise very little of what I'm about to type is going to make sense. Really there are only two key points of criticism, the first being how this fanfic explains itself too much. It is, to be honest, not a complicated story, and all that occurs is easy enough to understand given that the characters are all close friends. So it feels rather needless for Pinkie Pie's actions to be explained so much, though I'm probably going to explaining myself too much with following like this story does;

Applejack and Pinkie Pie exchanged glances. Especially with Applejack now looking at her as if to say "What are you doing?!" as it all dawned on her. But Pinkie smiled in a way to assure her, and it was true. Pinkie knew exactly what she was doing. While this was indeed a great idea for a fun prank, she knew better than to think it would end up badly. Of course, she knew that it wouldn't. If it did, she wouldn't be doing this. Not at all. As it settled in, Applejack could see that and looked relieved.

When Dash wasn't looking, Pinkie made a motion for her to play along, winking at her. Understanding, Applejack winked back and nodded in confirmation. The situation was perfectly under control, since Pinkie Pie knew exactly what Fluttershy would think.

The orange marked words are the parts I feel are unneeded, the last line in particular. With the first quoted paragraph the explanation has already been made and as such I don't feel there is much point in reiterating it again with that last line in the second quoted paragraph as it doesn't really add to anything. This same sort of problem of explaining more than is needed happens once again, with the following;

"Ah cain't believe it! This was too priceless!" Applejack hooted, managing to sit up. "So...yer really sure that it ain't gonna hurt her?"

"Of course not!" Pinkie shook her head. "I wouldn't do that to Dashie! I know exactly what I'm doing, Applejackie! It's a perfect little prank and it'll win Fluttershy's heart!"

"So...does she know about...all them sexy stuff?" The orange farm pony wanted to know, her brow furrowing.

Pinkie just smiled. "I know Fluttershy is going to be very happy to get a letter like that from Dashie."

This time I wouldn't put it down to just needlessly explaining things more than is needed, it's okay to reiterate here as it makes sense and seems a logical for Applejack to raise up once again now that the deed has been done. I feel a problem with this part is that it kind of spoils what happens or rather gives too obvious of a hint that Fluttershy will accept Rainbow Dash. Admittedly this is pretty 100% obvious given that you're the author of this piece but still, it would work better if Pinkie came across as knowing in a mischievous mysterious manner. My last critique is sort of to do with length and sort of not and... :applejackunsure: yeah, I'll explain it again with quotes;

To say that Fluttershy was stunned would have been the understatement of the millenium. She could not believe what she had just read! To think that Rainbow Dash felt that way about her, and that strongly, no less. Fluttershy would have never expected to have inflicted such stimulation on somepony, let alone Rainbow Dash of all ponies.

Her cheeks were bright red, her stomach coiled with a burning intensity, she could feel a strange mixture of embarrassed and yet flattered all at once. As sexual and open as it was, there was still that underlying sincerity in Rainbow’s written words, the true desire to get closer, to be together. She felt her heart race at the notion, at everything, to the point that her legs felt weak.

“Oh my gosh....” Fluttershy uttered, placing the letter down for a moment on the table. “I...I never knew...Rainbow liked me that way...let alone desired me in a sexual manner...that strongly...oh my... I...wait...did she even mean it?”

She considered, wondering why her oldest friend would joke about such a thing.

Angel, having been munching on a carrot, was now curious as to what his caretaker was up to, and why it seemed to knock her for a loop. When he saw her place the piece of paper on the table, he immediately leaped into action to go and see what it contained. He climbed up the chair she’d been sitting on, and then hopped onto the table to peer over the letter.

His little jaw dropped and his eyes went wide.

‘She can’t possibly....!!’

“Oh, hello there, Angel!” Fluttershy said sweetly, taking the letter and tucking it under her wing. “I...just um...have to take care of some business... I’ll be back a little later. You take care of things while I’m gone!”

Angel shook his head and grabbed for Fluttershy’s tail frantically. But his efforts were ignored as the creamy yellow mare quickly trotted out the door. Oh no, what had she gotten herself into?! He had to stop this, but how?! Did she not realize that her blue, rainbow-maned friend wanted to molest her?! What was he supposed to do to protect her now?

‘She better know what she’s doing...’

Now, you may be a little confused with my sudden use of blue, but this I meant to do as it marks an area that I don't feel should be removed but rather rewritten. The case is like the last Pinkie one, it feels like it already hints at Fluttershy's reaction and I feel the scene between Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash would have even more impact if we are not given this insight into Fluttershy's mind beforehand. I wouldn't call it as great of a criticism as my previous two though, and is not so much as something you should remove but something I suggest rewording to avoid the insight into Fluttershy's mind. Present her, having read the letter, as flustered and confused, but never go into her thoughts as specifically as you do, and then with a line that states her to be contemplating what she has read, follow it up with her leaving the house. Only my suggestion though, I don't feel this scene is so much a point to be critiqued but improved upon. As for the orange marked area, while I loved Angel's line Did she not realize that her blue, rainbow-maned friend wanted to molest her?!, Angel citing that he needs to protect her never goes anywhere. I feel if he's voicing it like this that it should be followed by some form of action but none is made, simply having him protesting by trying to grab at Fluttershy's tail (you could possibly insert a joke about Fluttershy's tail extensions :rainbowlaugh:) is enough though, without those later lines.

All in all though I enjoyed this fanfic. It was funny and such a thing was to be expected, but it was surprisingly deeper than I expected with great description and romantic sequences. You wrote Rainbow's sexual obliviousness perfectly in that one romance scene between her and Fluttershy, and I feel that moment alone stands out as being remarkably well written in a generally well written fanfic. It feels a bit long and Rainbow Dash seems somewhat out of character with her openly gushing over how cute she finds Fluttershy (which I feel would need a slower, more progressive stance on the character for it to feel natural though that isn't suited for a one-shot such as this) but the faults are few and weak compared to the good. Now I'm going to go and feed my bed. Superb job, keep up the great work! :twilightsmile:

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