The Conversation
TWICHAT
by GeodesicDragon
"I'm sorry, I've never really done this before." Twilight said, addressing the stallion in front of her, "You just seem like a nice pony, and seeing you makes a welcome change from all the other... strange individuals whom I've met today."
The stallion laughed heartily and smiled.
"It's good to see a female here." he said, "The sheer number of guys was, quite frankly, worrying me. A lot. And you're right about the strange individuals. I saw a guy earlier who was neck deep in jelly, for Celestia's sake!"
Twilight giggled.
"My name is Twilight Sparkle." she said, eager to change the subject and get the conversation moving, "What's yours?"
"I'm Silver Stomp." the stallion replied. "And I already knew who you were, Miss Sparkle. Everypony knows you and the other Elements of Harmony. It is an honour to be in the presence of somepony so spectacular as yourself."
A small blush crept onto Twilight's cheeks as she shied away.
"Now, now, Miss Sparkle," Silver said, "accept the compliment."
"I'm sorry," Twilight replied, "it's just that I'm still not used to the idea of my name being known to so many ponies. I guess I'm not cut out for the 'celebrity lifestyle'." She made quotation mark gestures to emphasise the last two words.
"Well then," Silver said with a smirk, "if you don't like it, then stop saving Equestria. That'll soon solve your problem."
Twilight looked shocked. She stared at Silver sternly. The stallion returned her gaze with one of his own, before he eventually burst into laughter.
"I'm kidding!" he said, almost falling over from laughing too hard, "You can never stop saving Equestria. It's what you do best."
Twilight's glare faded and was replaced with a sheepish grin.
"You know so much about me." she said, "Yet I know so little about about you. Care to help me out with that?"
Silver nodded and took a breath.
"Well, I was born in Manehatten. My family moved to Ponyville when I was a few months old. Truth be told, I was a bit of a jerk to the other foals. I bullied a few of them, and grew up as somepony who was feared. One day, I insulted somepony, and they snapped. In his rage, he nearly killed me. Waking up in the hospital, I realised that I was heading down a dark path, and set out to better myself. I soon discovered my talent for singing, and got my cutie mark. Since then, I've made a career out of it, touring across Equestria, doing gigs at various clubs."
Twilight's expression had changed from a smile to a scowl, and then back to a smile as Silver finished his story.
"It's good that you bettered yourself." she said, "Bullying somepony just because they're different is just wrong."
Silver nodded.
"If I could go back in time and tell myself that, I would." he said solemnly, "In fact, I'd change a lot of things about my life."
The two of them sat in silence for a moment. Turning to face the window, Twilight saw Luna's sky in all its glory, the full moon casting its soft glow upon the small town of Ponyville.
"I take it you can see something more interesting than me?" Silver asked. Twilight turned back to look at him and smiled, rubbing the back of her head with a hoof.
"Sorry," she said, "it's just that I really enjoy stargazing, and the sky is full of them tonight."
Silver turned to look at the sky. A shooting star streaked across it, and he smiled, turning back to face Twilight.
"I enjoy a bit of stargazing as well." he said, "My favourite constellation is Orion."
Twilight gasped, prompting Silver to raise an eyebrow.
"You seem surprised." he said, "I'm guessing I'm the first pony you've met who also enjoys stargazing?"
Twilight nodded.
"I tried to get my friends into it, but they didn't really enjoy it." she said, "Rainbow Dash called it an 'egghead' thing to do, and complained about having to be up so late."
Silver snorted.
"Sounds to me like Rainbow Dash is a fool." he said, "She must be, if she refuses to accept that the night is a beautiful thing."
"It is." Twilight replied, "By the way, my favourite constellation is the Ursa Minor."
Silver laughed.
"I remember when one of them came to town." he said, "And I heard about how you dealt with it. Very well done."
Twilight blushed again.
"Now, now, Twilight." Silver said with a chuckle, "What did I tell you about accepting compliments?"
"I know, I know." Twilight replied, "I should accept them. And I do, so... thank you."
"You're welcome." Silver replied, "I got into stargazing as a colt, after the incident that landed me in hospital. I needed a hobby to keep me off the streets and away from my peers. Sitting up late one night, I found myself counting the stars, and attempting to draw the constellations on paper."
"That's how I got into it as well." Twilight replied. "Do you still partake in stargazing?"
Silver shook his head, as a smile appeared on his face.
"I stopped doing it once I got into my teenage years." he said, "I found a hobby that was much more relaxing than looking at the sky through a tube with a lens on the end."
Twilight scoffed.
"You found something that's more enjoyable than stargazing?" she said, "I find that very hard to believe. But please, enlighten me."
Silver's smile turned into a sly grin.
"I was hoping you'd say that." he said, "I've always dreamed of showing one of the Elements of Harmony my new hobby..."
Silver rolled onto his back, out of Twilight's line of sight. As she waited for him to reappear, something else caught her eye.
Leaning in closer, Twilight saw that the object was long and smooth... and had a hoof wrapped around it which was moving up and down at an increasing rate of speed.
Twilight's eyes widened as realisation hit her. Screaming in terror, she leapt from her seat and pulled the power cord from the wall.
As she stood there with the cord in her hooves, a single thought entered her frazzled mind.
I am never going on Chatroulette again.
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'Tis a very short one-shot
I'll give it a look later.
1528081
I didn't want to drag it out any longer than I had to.
What... the... bloody fuck? Twilight and SPOILER REDACTED? That was... um... I liked it.
1528120
I know, I could have used a different OC. But I suck at naming them.
1528131
oh it's not the OC that I'm stuck on. it's the ending... it was... rather unexpected.
LMAO!!!
Somehow, I don't think Twi expected Mr. Wiggly to appear lol
1528141
Good, that's what I was aiming for.
1528152
Hmm... Everytime I see someone doing this sort of thing in front of a webcam, I want to 'break' (i.e. cut) their corpus cavernosum penis.
Haha poor Twilight. She's now scarred forever!
I know the feel Twi. That was hilarious!
And it was going so well!
Bah, Chatroulette.
Poor Twily
What the.........
I'd read this now, but first I have to shoot thing in Unreal Tournament. But I have to install it first...
I was too baffled by the ending at first, (which was hilarious, btw) but then I went back and read the ending again, and: "in her HAND". Really? I don't know what's funnier, the slip-up, or that the ending completely distracted my otherwise pedantic mind from it.
~ TDG
1529169
It was a typo. It's been fixed.
Thanks for the comment!
Funny stuff, man.
That ending.
Thanks for the story upload.
I got to admit that made me laugh
I think it would of been nice without the ending by o well still good
1529931
The ending is the whole point of this story.
1529979
I know but it could have been so much more...I did see it coming but still, it was good
Oh gods... this is tragically accurate.
I laughed way to hard
Given that the entire thing is a setup for that ending, you really should set the rating to mature.
TEEN!?!? Get this into the mature category, for peats sake!
lol... just lol....
1531585
1531712
The Mature rating would only apply to graphic descriptions of a sexual nature. There is nothing of the sort here, since I am using a clever choice of words to describe what is going on.
>hoof wrapped around it
I don't think they work that way mate.
Much more relaxing… I don't think Twi thought the same as that dood.
1531585
1531712
1532228
1532235
When in doubt, ask a mod. I've messaged the mod who approved this story, so hopefully they can set the record straight.
At first, I thought this was going to be an introspection piece about how Twilight might meet a friend in an otherwise unreliable method of random chatting. Then I realized you'd listed this as a comedy, so I instantly knew something was going to be, or go, wrong.
My first suspicion might be that he'd leave and someone else, perhaps a family member or a roommate, would screw things up for him and possibly traumatize her.
Then....
Poor Twilight. No pony should have to see that... well, if they don't want to, anyway.
it took me awhile to realized "object was long and smooth... had a hoof wrapped around it which was moving up and down at an increasing rate of speed" but when it did.. oh god why
This seems utterly transparent for my liking...
At first, I was like
Then
Then
And finally
But then I was like
Good story, you get a like!
1533927
1532473
I'm sorry, what?
1534143
I refer your attention to this comment: 1532235
I am merely telling you that I have sought advice from the mods regarding the situation about the rating.
Oh dear...
I was expecting Omegle at first, then speed dating... good thing it wasn't...
Anyway, this gets a like from me.
Funniest way to end a story award goes to.... GeodesicDragon! was there ever any doubt?
1534670
I'm honoured to accept this award.
1534183
Actually, I meant that I don't believe a hoof would be able to bend in such a way so as to pleasure oneself on webcam.
1534743
Oh. Well sorry. I must have read it wrong.
1534765
No need to apologise on your part; I'm a bit hard to understand sometimes.
1532228
At the very least a warning. That was hardly clever wording, when its that blunt. Change one or two words to what you really mean and its mature. Putting up as teen, without warning of content, is deseptive, crude, and perverted.
And that is how Twilight was put off stallions for life.