Struggling with alcoholism, Rainbow Dash finds herself watching over Ponyville on the anniversary of the worst day of her life. Sometimes, nopony can help.
Written originally for Quills and Sofas’ St. Patrick’s Day speedwriting contest. The prompt was “End of The Rainbow” Thank you to Vis-A-Viscera, Snow Quill and Buttery Biscuit for pre-reading during the contest!
Cover art: Done by me
CW: This fic talks heavily about alcohol, and portrays alcoholism. If you are struggling with addiction, please try and get help if possible.
Chapters (1)
For what it is, it's well done.
But I just can't really get into it, mostly because it's predicated on the whole "Dash gets kicked out of the Wonderbolts" thing. I've just... come to HATE that as a premise.
10728677
Fair enough, I get that. Ain’t for everyone ^^
10728699
I like this comment a lot and I definitely see what you're saying, as well as agree with it.
Context is, we had an hour to write and I didn't even really know what I was going to write until literally the exact moment we started, so I think the quality definitely suffered for that haha. But thank you for the like ^^
10728703
I was worried how you'd take it.
So sorry I deleted the comment on an impulse just before I saw your reply.
In the interest of full disclosure, I'll summarize what I said earlier: well written story, but it feels more like a story about alcoholism with pony characters sprinkled in.
Speedwriting is hard. I could never do what you're doing! I tense up if I have to do something in a time crunch, which is why I'm not in Quills and Sofas.
10728704
Oh haha no worries! You didn't really even say anything rude or whatever I actually enjoyed hearing it :) but i get it hehe I do that sometimes too
Pretty good story.
.
Don't know if it was intentional but did you mean calling?
Also, will we get a sequel to where Dash goes to AA?
Also not gonna lie, I suspected it was about the death of Scootaloo
10728716
shoot I meant "called" idk how I let that typo slip past me, thanks for pointing it out! And It would have been insanely tragic if Scoots died omg.
To be honest, I wasn't planning on having a sequel to this at all, but who knows what the future holds i store.
Thanks for the comment!
10728738
Welcome.
Dang, that hits hard, especially as someone with alcoholic family and who's come close to it myself. Once again you never fail to impress.
10729503
I'm glad you're safe >~< and thank you so much!
Honestly, the way i see it is that the others have no choice but to watch and see what happens.
10732399
Sometimes, unfortunately, thats all you can do
10732530
Doesn’t it usually result in a train wreck? At least that’s what I heard.
10732546
Sometimes, yeah. But maybe at first, all you can do is watch.
Although knowing the Mane 6, they'll try and help out Dash once they realize how bad she is
10732652
That’s true.
I wonder what happened to Dash that got her kicked out.
At first, I thought this was being solved too easily as Scoots was talking to Dash. Then, the ending hit. Good work here. It's not an enjoyable read, but less mindless fluff for more poignant portraits of hard-hitting issues like these are always something I'll welcome.
10759117
It’s kind of mentioned what happened, but only a bit. Dash implies she got kicked out for getting drunk before a Wonderbolts show, although the specifics weren’t stated. I definitely don’t blame you for saying it ain’t enjoyable, cause it ain’t, but it shouldn’t be. Thanks for reading :)
10759147
Yeah, I wasn't sure if she was trying to imply that this was an issue before or once she got kicked out. Either way, she's being awfully dishonest and I was taking everything she said with a grain of salt.
10759156
Well, it was definitely a recurring issue. I doubt Spitfire would have kicked her out if it was a one-time thing haha. But yeah, she is definitely being dishonest, so I would take it with a huge serving of salt as well.
10759163
If you ever decide to write the events leading up to this, that would be pretty pog too.
10759166
Haha, that’s definitely something to consider
10759168
Well, then good thing I've got my eye on you. 👀
10759176
Hopefully I’ll give you something good to look at soon then 👀
Oof, this hits hard.
Scootaloo is so well written here. She can sort of grasp the situation, but she doesn't know the full story, and she's still acting like a kid would. Especially given how much she idolizes Rainbow, she probably wouldn't lift a hoof to stop her because she thinks she shouldn't. Her subconscious is relying on Rainbow listening to her.
The line that really got me though was Scootaloo asking Dash to promise her not to drink anymore. And Dash just doesn't form that promise. She knows she can't fulfill it. She's so scared of admitting defeat, admitting that she has problems, but she already has.
Beyond the characters, which are great, Cloverfest is a really nice idea for a holiday, and it ties in perfectly with the theming. While I feel like you could have used a different plot point besides the Wonderbolts, the rest of the story is amazing.
Wonderful story Jay!
10812862
heehoo thanks for the comment! really made me smile I'm glad you enjoyed :D