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Narrative Style


The midpoint of a pony's leg is a po-knee.

T

We are all familiar with the story of the Canterlot Wedding, where the queen of the changelings foalnaps and impersonates Princess Cadance during her wedding as a ploy to invade the city with her army. Yet there is another Equestria out there where the roles of the impersonated and the impersonator are a little different.

We enter at the wedding ceremony; the nobles, the friends and family, the bride and groom have gathered, but the best mare hasn't been seen since her outburst at the rehearsal...

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 133 )

I'm impressed. It was certainly not what I expected to happen as a result of Twilight's intervention, but it was a well-written story nonetheless.

Also, any chance of a sequel?

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No solid sequel plans currently, but bits and pieces of what happens afterward are floating around in my head.

Aww, this is so cuuuute. :3
The first time I see the Canterlot Wedding done like this, I like it. Definitely want more now.

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Good enough for me.

A cute short little story, Cadenza got shafted something fierce but she kind of turned out bratty

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I suspect she'll recover. There are other eligible bachelors for a mare looking for a trophy husband...

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I dunno, I'm pretty sure this gonna bite them in the ass.

its also kind of wrong to let the changeling just keep cady's identity, no matter what she did. (considering you know, twilight pretty much did the same thing cadance did not to long earlier)

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its also kind of wrong to let the changeling just keep cady's identity, no matter what she did.

It so happens that Mi Amore Cadenza has made it entirely clear that the nickname "Cadance" or any variations thereof are not to be associated with her, so no "identity" is being taken.

And I can assure you that Mi Amore Cadenza does not become a horrible, evil villain after this. Not any more than Blueblood, at least. I happen to know, being the person who wrote it.

A very nice AU, and an interesting take on the whole event. Well done!

Great story I love it a lot. But I must ask:

Celestia pulled back. She looked into Cadenza’s gaze, and saw her own failure; a filly who had grown up to be less than she could have been, had Celestia been a more attentive guide. But the past could not be changed, and what might have been could not be allowed to influence what is. “Very well.” Celestia closed her eyes, dreading what she was about to say. “Mi Amore Cadenza; for your failure to learn and grow into your role as Princess of Love, you are now stripped of that title, and demoted to duchess.”

Why is the real Candace being punished? She maybe mean, but she’s a victim in all of this. Her life was stolen and it lead to her being forgotten about. It leaves off without going to deep into all the feelings around that. That seems to be because it’s not the focus of the story.
But I don’t get why she was punished.

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I feel like this should be she was a victim also.

What she did to Shining was awful but it still feels like she was too heavily punished.

Edit was to fix bad grammar.

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To hazard a guess? Mind control.

Claimed there might be feels...Yeah, not so sure about that. I'm not trying to be rude, but switching which character gets shafted doesn't really lead to anything magical. Maybe a sequel if you end up making one will prove me wrong, but as it is left off, I'm gonna have to put an asterisk next to Feels.

I... really just straight up feel bad for cadenza. Just... wow.

“Yea... sorry that I, your (presumed) mother figure, kinda tossed you out of the country and forgot you existed. Also you aren’t a princess anymore.”

Just, ouch. I like the story but... just poor her.

The one I feel the most bad out of all of these is Cadenza. She may be a brat, but that brattiness came from situations out of her control.

I am happy for changeling Cadence though.

More please !:fluttercry:

This had better keep going! It's such a well written and unique idea!

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It's heavily implied that when the original Cadenza replaced changeling Cadance, Shining started having second thoughts about the wedding, and Cadenza's response to this was to mind control a stallion she had just met into going through with marrying her.

Yes, Cadenza is a tragic character, here, but I'm a bit confused by the people who are acting like she didn't do anything wrong.

Very well written Canterlot Wedding AU. :) I really enjoyed it a lot.

Bigd2k #20 · Jan 20th, 2021 · · 1 ·

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I needed to amend my response. I'm not saying she's innocent and shouldn't be punished at all. But the punishment of having her title taken feels like a kneejerk and overreaction.

She has literally had her life stolen. She was replaced for 13 years with no one even noticing. As far as she could tell no one even cared she was gone. She was replaced, and when it was exposed no one showed any outrage in her favor. Everyone seemed to be against her. In a lot of ways her life was stolen with everyone preferring the theft to her, including Celestia.

But its not necessary that, that makes it seem overly harsh. It's more that while what she did was wrong, the one who did all that to her not only goes free, without even a preverbally slap on the wrist, but she's cheered and treated like a hero for what she did. For the real Candance to get such a immediate and harsh punishment and the fake to walk free is what makes it seem completely unfair.

Damm this was really interesting, more so then I was expecting. I wish it was longer just to continue the enjoyment.
question tho
What was the name for Chaneling-Candy? like what was her changeling name before taking Candance? or could you just not think of a good one that fit and left it up to our imagination?

~Reggie

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So there are two threads here. The first is pony Cadenza getting punished for casually using mind-control for a selfish reason and to such an extent that it incapacitated the head of the royal guard during a military emergency. I feel like there's a bit of a misunderstanding, here; this is equivalent, in the real world, to straight up kidnapping a member of government. By all rights, she should be thrown in the dungeons. Instead, Celestia lets her off with a removal of title (which, by the way, was "Princess of Love", which requires being an exemplar of love to hold. It wasn't just a punishment, it was also a matter of not living up to what the title meant).

And everybody being against her... that's what happens when you treat people badly. They aren't inclined to back you up when you fall. Celestia geuinely tried to reach out, and others will as well down the line, but in the moment, it would have been unrealistic for ponies to take her side out of some notion of inherent justice when she had treated everybody involved so horribly.
Edit: It's worth noting that changeling Cadance's friends did attempt to talk to her, but they stormed off because Cadanza was being cruel and obnoxious.

The second thread is whether changeling Cadance should be punished. I'm of the view that Celestia, and so Equestria in general, is in favor of punishment only towards those who still need to learn that what they did was wrong. Cadance was willing to sacrifice the life she had enjoyed for over a decade to make up for her wrongs, and stood up against her own mother to defend Equestria. To punish her after all that would be, in Celestia's view, both unjust and counterproductive. Not to mention the political angle that this changeling Cadance is now the sovereign monarch of her people and just throwing her in the dungeon would kind of mess up the chance at peace.

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Oh, I know what her name is. There's a very good reason it's not mentioned: She hates it. Not idly, either; more like "this name represents everything I don't want to be and I want to bury it under the badlands."

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I think it's more had something to do with because we didn't know much about what she did other than mind controlling Shining Armor which because of it, some reader(including myself) can only imagining a thing like this...

She was sent out to Prance by the new family of her. Her new aunt Celestia to study in other kingdom(I assume). Because Celestia was the princess that she thought to know the best things for her, she did what she said with a warm heart and go to study board there in Prance. Everything went well at first she was arrived there and everything seems nice, but something happened, we(reader) don't know how she was raised there and when I'm comparing her and canon Cadance, she obviously had no love and care from Celestia like the canon Cadance or the changeling Cadance and I could only assume she was bullied. Why? Because we don't know what happened to her, Reader can imagine things like she was bullied because she is a foreigner for the nobility of Prance or any another way. Maybe because of what the populace of Prance did to her, she was down on her, bottom she needed an advice from the princess Celestia, but she got no reply. She kept sending and sending all the letter, growing more desperate and wanting to go back home in Equestria but all she got was nothing. She was so frustrated that the figurehead of her nation, the place she was coming from and the pony who might've said to pick her up under her wing and send her in the first place said nothing, all she got was nothing. She had to live on her own without her family from Equestria and without Celestia herself all alone in the other place she doesn't know for how long she must be there. Her mind began to thought about something that wasn't true but with her evidence she got? No contact, no letter, no anything. It was hard at first but as hard as it is, she realizes Celestia must have abandoned her. She, the pony she thought to be her aunt was betrayed her, and she had to live there all by herself. She had to adapt, now she has to live by her own because Celestia has abandoned her. This ultimately become the very different Cadance from canon. She had no love and care that she supposed to get, and she had no power to obtain them. It's something outside her control, and she doesn't want this. Yet when she receives a letter from Equestria, she was overjoyed. The Thing might have to change for a better, and she was finally allowed to go back to Equestria.

And then she was striped from her Princess hood because...

your failure to learn and grow into your role as Princess of Love

It's not her fault to be in a situation outside her control and I can't blame her.

I'm just rambling didn't I? It's more or less what I thought.

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From the story:

She remembered thinking of sending Cadance to the École Aurore once. Her niece was just a filly at the time, and she had a bit of an attitude problem back then. Rather like how she’d been behaving the last few days, in fact ... It couldn’t be. Cadance hadn’t gone to that school; she’d promised to fix her behavior instead, and she did.

Cadenza was sent to the boarding school because she was already a brat. She failed to make any connections there because she continued to be a brat, pushing away everybody she met. Celestia feels guilty for not being there to help her, but truthfully, Celestia wouldn't have been able to help; she's just not good with parenting/mentoring (see Sunset Shimmer running away, Twilight being a complete antisocial mess pre-Ponyville). Could things have been handled better? Sure. All characters in this story made mistakes. But Cadenza's were pretty bad, and crucially, she doesn't understand why they were wrong.

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I understand your thought process and can't even say I disagree.

But you say Candance should get leniency because of what she went through but Cadenza doesn't?

The punishment does sound fit for Cadenza. What makes it sound off is that it's immediate with what seems to be little thought to what see went through. I get that she wasn't nice but it doesn't excuse her having her life robbed from her. It feels like Candace's story is accepted as heart warming with no one caring what she did. While for Cadenza everything is just brushed to the side likes no big deal.

Like I said I understand where you are coming from and mostly I agree, But no one in the story cares one bit what happened to Cadenza. And saying she was mean, therefore deserves no help is no excuse. It just becomes cruel.


All that said, you have a lot of material for a sequel.
Are the changelings trusted? is it a smooth transition? or is everyone leery of them?
What about Candance how does she go forward now that she's a queen?
Where does Cadenza go from here? does she change her ways? or does she try to cause a rift between changelings and ponies out of spite?

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But you say Candance should get leniency because of what she went through but Cadenza doesn't?

Not because of what she went through, but because she showed remorse for her actions.

Edit: Cadenza was demoted to a lesser title. That's the only thing she was "robbed" of. All of Cadance's friends were made by changeling Cadance. All of Cadance's accomplishments in Canterlot were done by changeling Cadance. The only thing Cadenza was stripped of, the title "Princes of Love", is now held by nopony. She's still nobility. Celestia isn't happy with her, but she also isn't going to throw her out in the rain. And the guilt eating at changeling Cadance means she'll make an effort to reach out to Cadenza as well. Her position is sad, but not hopeless. She has allies; she just needs to let them in.

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First thank you for taking the time to respond to me for what’s basically a side point in your story.

That actually clears this up quite a bit. When I read it felt like she was tossed aside. Like no one cared their princess was replaced for years. But you put it a different perspective. From Celestia’s point of view she’s disappointed Cadenza hasn’t changed and felt what she did was over the line. For those who befriended the fake they rallied around her more then went against Cadenza. Everyone else it’s a bit more shock to indifference then it is going against her. Thinking about it like that it does make it a lot more fair.

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It's not exactly a side-point. There are a lot of unfinished stories here that could still use addressing. I apologize if this came off as though it was intended to be a simple happy ending. Nobody's "arc" is exactly over at the end of this. It's a snapshot into a complex situation with complex consequences.

Moar, I need moar, a sequel, there has to be a sequel! No! Not a sequel, a full on SERIES!

I feel so bad for Cadenza.

I think what really nailed it in was when the ball was in Celestia's court. Celestia called Cadenza 'Cadence' and at that moment it was just over. Cadenza isn't a saint by any means, but Celestia is an awful aunt and teacher.

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Sunset the runaway, Twilight the neurotic mess, and Luna the shunned can all attest that Celestia isn't good at emotional guidance or support. It's one of her defining traits: She means well, but she tends to miss the trees for the forest.

Kichi #33 · Jan 20th, 2021 · · 1 ·

Not bad, I liked your version. Even so, I feel that Cadenza was punished too much, she not only had 'her wedding' ruined, but after many years return with Celestia, finding that someone took her name and identity and they like her more, she is justified to be a little angry, as she had a 'life' in Prance, and while is not Celestia fault if the communication between them was stolen, Celestia dismissed her like old news.

This was nice. The pacing could have been lengthened and there were parts that needed more development and parts that needed less but it made sense and clicked together.

Also Lol this is literally just me but I’m getting deja Vu from my own story. I wonder if you heard of it? It’s called Princess Celestia: the Changeling Queen and has a very similar replacement mechanic to yours.

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This. While I'm sure her time abroad was SUPPOSED to allow her to grow and mature, the end result was that she was put in an enormously stressful situation. She literally had no fallback and her only lifeline had been cut off for 13 years. Compound that with the potential political climate in Prance(if this is supposed to exist in the universe of another of the author's stories I really hope they actually describe Prance, because my mental image for any fantasy country based on France is Orlais from the dragon age franchise.) which she would be hard-pressed to avoid as a noble from a neighboring country,and she had absolutely no chance WITHOUT easy access to Celestia.

Disregarding ALL that, Celestia pretty clearly states shes punishing Cadenza for her own failures and not anything within Cadenza's control. So the point I made by reading much farther into the story than strictly necessary is irrelevant. Needless to say, all Celestia is doing is burning a bridge when she should've been building one. All this is going to do is alienate Cadenza in the future and make her less likely to reach out to anyone, especially Cadence.

Also someone(EDIT: it was the author believe it or not)tried to claim that she didn't see what she'd done as wrong but its pretty clearly implied that she DOES know what she did to Shining was wrong and feels at least slightly guilty about it. In all honesty the only things she actually did wrong were not touching base with Celestia BEFORE the whole thing snowballed, but that's more Celestia's fault than anything, and using a spell she clearly didn't understand.

EDIT: (I'm going to preface this bit by stating this isnt an attack, but a critique in good faith) an author cannot add canon outside the medium, because not everyone will see it. Certain claims put forward by you as the author, like how Cadenza didnt make any connections in Prance or that she didn't feel guilty about using the spell on Shining, would need to be either implied or explicitly stated in-medium. Neither of which are true to what you've written. If you feel like those are points that should be seen, it might be beneficial for future readers to either revise this and keep it as a one shot, or write a follow-up that explains the world you've crafted and Cadenza's history more in-depth.

Honestly Celestia accomplished two things with her handling of Mi Amore. She destroyed any chance that she will reach out to anyone in the future. After all, Celestia tossed her out of her life, replaced her with love-sucking monster, forgot about her, left her in different country without any support (I'm very interested how she wasn't kicked out of boarding school, because Celestia probably wasn't paying for that) and stripped her of the title. Celestia also got herself immortal enemy, who will forever lurk in the court, opposing her every action, gathering strength and allies and, maybe, far away in the future, she will take everything from Celestia.

This was a quite good and original fanfic. Thumb up!
I for one would like a sequel in which Twilight would help Cadenza into becoming a better mare, and help mending the bridge between Celestia and her. And Cadance becoming a part of the Sparkle family.

Celestia pulled back. She looked into Cadenza’s gaze, and saw her own failure; a filly who had grown up to be less than she could have been, had Celestia been a more attentive guide. But the past could not be changed, and what might have been could not be allowed to influence what is. “Very well.” Celestia closed her eyes, dreading what she was about to say. “Mi Amore Cadenza; for your failure to learn and grow into your role as Princess of Love, you are now stripped of that title, and demoted to duchess.”

thus Celestia, with her indifference and inattention to others, creates another nightmare moon or sunset shimmer

“Very well.” Celestia closed her eyes, dreading what she was about to say. “Mi Amore Cadenza; for your failure to learn and grow into your role as Princess of Love, you are now stripped of that title, and demoted to duchess.”

Amazing, Chrysalis managed to be a more insightful parental figure than Celestia, and demonstrated a greater degree of trust to boot. I'm honestly curious how she expected Cadence to grow as an exemplar of love while being kept at arms length from everyone she might form a close bond with.

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Certain claims put forward by you as the author, like how Cadenza didnt make any connections in Prance or that she didn't feel guilty about using the spell on Shining, would need to be either implied or explicitly stated in-medium. Neither of which are true to what you've written.

For the second point, how do you write "she didn't feel guilty", if not how it was done here? Should I have had a character spell it out, and say the words "she clearly doesn't feel guilty"?

For the first, perhaps I should have written a bit where there's testimony from various characters who knew Cadenza in Prance and to a one considered her thoroughly unlikeable, indicating she wasn't getting along with anybody?

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while being kept at arms length from everyone she might form a close bond with.

She was stated to be a problem child before she was sent away; she didn't have close bonds with anybody in either place... so why should Canterlot be better for that than Prance, given that she's starting from zero either way? Celestia abdicated parenting duty (which I maintain is just writing her consistent with canon), but there was no shortage of ponies over there for her to form attachments with, whether friends or even finding a new mentor figure... that her behavior didn't change at all indicates that she didn't learn to make friends, and that's at least partly on her. After all, sending a pony unprepared to an unfamiliar place was how Celestia taught Twilight friendship, and look, it worked!

I wonder how much of this reaction I'm getting about Cadenza is less about what I've written and more about an attachment to the character of Cadance, and people not liking how I've treated "her" on an emotional, "don't hurt my beloved character" level. I hadn't considered this angle, because in my mind, the parallel of canon Cadance is the changeling, not the pony.

It is an interesting take on the Canterlot Wedding. While I do feel Cadenza was a brat, I also do feel that she was neglected at the same time. If Celestia is not careful with how she handles her in the future she could end up with another Nightmare Moon incident .

Would Her Highness like an escort?

Hmm this is not the correct form of address.
First of all it should be Your as it is directly addressing the person and for a Queen [And in general for any RULING monarch] it should be Majesty.

accompany Her Highness on her outing.

Same as above.

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Well... What makes you think that just by being the author you know what is in your story?
;P

The only smallish issue... is that Mi Amore Cadenza IS an alicorn, so she has to have done something right to be there...
And has that cutie mark... So... there may be problems down the way ^^;;;

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I understand the notion that I can't just assert things that aren't present in the story and expect them to be impactful, but... I'm genuinely confused by how some people are taking it on themselves to assert their own interpretation of events (e.g. making an entire backstory for what Cadenza's position was like in Prance, or even the supposed political landscape of the place) and then proceed to criticize the story for what they themselves inserted into it.

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I considered that, and though it nagged me a bit, I would remind that there is another alicorn (Luna) who abdicated her alicorn duty pretty thoroughly; getting to be an alicorn means you did something right at the time, but it doesn't necessarily mean you'll keep doing it right.

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Nah, I was just making a quote of an answer Isaac Asimov got at a conference where one of the speaker went quite long on what the author meant in one essay, with Asimov completely disagreeing with the analysis. He went then to confront the guy WITHOUT introducing himself but just saying "I don't think that the author meant what you are saying" and at the obvious counter "Who do you think you are to say that?" he answered gleefully "I am the author" to which he got that answer ^^;;;
And you are perfectly right in what you are saying.
I'm also quite perplexed by the strenuous defense of Mi Amore Cadenza, it is quite clear in the story that she is not a good person and quite a brat.

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At least one person even entirely dismissed the notion that mind-controlling somebody into marrying her was wrong, which... I don't even know where to go with that. Mind-controlling people into life-changing decisions is wrong.

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