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Twilight Sparkle is fine. She would never intentionally hurt herself. They're just morbid thoughts. Nothing to worry about. She's not suicidal, or even depressed! But Wallflower might be. Should she say something? Is it any of her business?

And what is it about the scars on Wallflower's arms that are so...fascinating?

Chapters (4)
Comments ( 57 )
Comment posted by PonyAmorous deleted Feb 24th, 2020

Uh, woah. This is... something. Let's see where you take Twilight from here.


Her analytical attitude toward suicide just makes this feel so...real. You can imagine her approaching suicide this way.

With that description, you definitely have my attention. First chapter was interesting too.

Bam. It's eqg suicide/self-harm from a good author. So far, twilight is great. It appears she's written in a very similar style to then tommorow came, which of course I loved, so this will probably be pretty good too.

I maaay have gotten this idea lodged in my head after stumbling across and reading Bad Habits and Day Zero. Kudos on making my skin crawl.

Oh gosh, talk about an ego boost. I'm glad I could inspire(?) you!

Those fics are just venting stuff I threw together on a whim though. This one's the real quality stuff.

TThe Time We Have Left
Unable to handle her anxiety without the memory stone, Wallflower Blush tries to end her life. The attempt leaves her too injured to recover, and with just hours left to live, she expects to die all alone—until Sunset Shimmer appears, asking, “Why?"
Scampy · 5.8k words  ·  206  22 · 3.9k views

That's what my overflowing vanity tells me, anyway. Which is partially your fault :p

Right. Read that one right after the other two had whet my appetite. Thought the "sweet spot" of being past a blood transfusion working but still awake and able to talk was odd, until I read your research comments and learned it was just plausible enough to justify a reach for the narrative device.

If it wasn't already obvious, the "everything is under control" theme from Bad Habits is probably going to be the biggest visible influence.

We've probably all been there at one point or another.

A Scampy always does her research qB^)

Funny how she feels so in control... Until she suddenly and abruptly doesn't.

Think you need some sort of backup with hanging in case it doesn't work due to improper knots or some other reason.
I'm thinking either taking some sort of pills or poison before hanging yourself or hanging yourself over some large height that would kill you upon impact.
The main goal is to be dead - don't want to be brain damaged or crippled in some way.

If you get inventive enough in the 'backup' you could gain some style point for whatever you may or may not loose in the other categories.

This may be considered disturbing but I for one find it very interesting by the way it is written.

I don't really know what to say other than 'wow'.

Some of this is starting to hit a little too close to home...

For some reason I'm drawn to this story just like how Twilight is drawn to the morbid thought.

I could honestly see Wally making an attempt here--and given the tone of this story, she might actually succeed. Imagine Twilight getting the call from a sobbing, heartbroken Sunset, only to be like, "Oh, wow... Good for her," and then getting more serious suicidal thoughts of her own.

I love any type of story that embraces intrusive thoughts and this story does that perfectly (I’m a little concerned about Twilight now, though)!

Man, that last part was brutal.

Poor Twilight. She means so well.

There's a lot of layers to this story. Sunset is a wildcard, Twilight is actively encouraging Wallflower to self-harm, Twilight is hurting herself now, and Wally... God, poor Wally.

If she's anything like she is in Bad Habits, and therefore anything like me by proxy lmfao, then this line--

"Well, I'm not. There's no need to worry about that, so you can stop pretending to care and just leave me alone."

--about her not being a suicide risk is full of shit. She's in danger, and her new friend's morbid fascination with her self-harming is only pushing her closer to the edge. And, given this story's tone and focus... She could very well actually try to kill herself.

It's like we were talking about earlier. She has it under control... Until she doesn't.

This story is my jam.

This chapter actively hurts to read.

In the literary good way.

The way this chapter is written and structured is interesting. Twilight notes that Wallflower hasn't made use of her scalpel in three consecutive visits, which leads me to wonder if Twilight making friends with Wallflower as she did gave her reason to feel like she could stop cutting herself. And if such is the case, has Twilight unintentionally led Wallflower to believe that some form of reciprocation is now necessary in order for them to be friends?

Glad you're enjoying it.

First chapter Twilight is basically just me, and while following chapters are thankfully in no way autobiographical, they're something of an exercise in "what is the worst possible way I could handle that hypothetical scenario while still plausibly being able to convince myself I'm helping."

Which I guess makes the entire story something like a giant intrusive thought I'm having.

I uhh... I hope those fics of mine that you read aren't partially responsible for those thoughts x_x

Seriously though, please never hurt yourself.

Nope. Definitely been that way a long time. And it really isn't a problem at all. Absolutely no impulses to hurt myself, just speculation on what would happen if I did X. With the answer usually being "that would certainly suck. Better not do that."

I'm fine.

Though I realize that's probably less reassuring when the entire story is about a character who is convinced they're fine and definitely isn't.

This looks like it is going to be a really, really destructive friendship.

Instead of one person helping the other, they seem to be enabling each other's worst habits.

It still fits in the T category. It would only be M if you made it super detailed or had some type of organ involved.

Oh wow, it's over already? Huh.

I guess it would be hypocritical of me to ask for a follow-up, but I'm still gonna, lulz. I want more Wallyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy--

Good story all around. Like she said, Twilight has it all under control, it's fine, she's fine... Until she's not. You captured that essence very well here.

Why... why did you do that... why does she have to be gone...


that one Wallyfic Scampy did about Wallflower cutting herself

You're gonna have to be way more specific :v

I mean, she doesn't have to be.

Might almost be worse if she gets caught. Literally.

Ah, l'appel du vide, that wonderful intrusive thought of "What if I just did something self-destructive right now"?

Or, perhaps l'appel du vide combined with scientific reasoning taken to a logical and quite horrifying extreme. In a morbid way, I kind of like the direction this is heading in - looking forward to the rest of it.

At first I was thinking "Wait, what does Twilight need yttrium of all elements for?", then I looked again and thought "Hang on, did you make as delightfully nerdy a suicide joke as I think you just did there?". Bravo, bloody bravo.

It's almost as though Twilight's thought processes are similar to your typical trains of thought associated with depression: Making links that aren't there and extrapolating them until they spiral out of all reason. Except instead of those thoughts dragging you further into depression, Twilight's thoughts cause her to make all the absolute worst decisions on what could otherwise be a pretty healthy friendship.

All while maintaining that paltry justification of her being in control and doing it because she just knows it will help.

Holy shit, that got out of control quickly - "Spiral" is definitely an apt name for this chapter.

It's only really in the last few paragraphs, when Sunset is introduced as an outside observer, that we get a glance at just how far Twilight has fallen. Up until then, it's clear that she's gotten worse but things still seemed... containable. It's only with the context that Sunset's reactions gave that you realise the story's final two words are a flat-out lie.

Really enjoyable read, in a "watching a runaway train" sort of way. It certainly made me wonder what the story might've been like told from Wallflower's or Sunset's point of view as well - either the person who's had extensive experience with this, or the person who's had none at all.

Both Twilights can be super fucking blunt when pushed too far. It's fairly spot on here but a little closer to true / what I expected was for Twilight to just clap back at Wally's tantrum like "Oh no, I'd just feel like the absolute worst person in the world because I didn't do anything about what I knew was happening."

I have pretty thick and tough skin, so I'm with Twilight here. Branding is better.

Glad I'm not the only person who seriously contemplates without intent stepping in front of a bus.

I open the bottom drawer and push aside the pile of socks to expose a plain wooden box.

What kind of monster...
Everybody knows it goes socks/undergarments, shirts, pants!

Also NSPH is hot fucking garbage.

When someone brings up the quaint notion of "planning for retirement", I usually laugh and say that the retirement plan for most millenials is stepping in front of a train.
I don't know what NSPH is, but it's shirts on top, shorts/pants in middle, and socks/underwear on bottom, you heretic!

The suicide prevention hotline people. I've gotten what boils down to "just stop being sad like ???" And hung up on, on multiple occasions. I'm not an outlier, it's a pretty common experience.

Damn..... I always thought I was morbid
This was a really interesting fic to read and I think its really smart how you set it up, only to have Twilight drop herself into this rabbit hole or should I say jump into

I love how well-written this story is, and the ending is beyond incredible. It honestly is a good ending, and you've done such a great job on this fic, but honestly I'm very concerned for Twi. I know that was your intent, and you succeeded. Very well done. I know the ending is supposed to be up for interpretation by the viewer, but what's your interpretation of it? Was it your intent to... kill Twilight?

You're definitely right that ambiguity is the intent. As such, I'm not really sure that even I have a preferential interpretation. If I had to say, I've probably got a 60% leaning towards dead.

Then there's always the pragmatic side to any ambiguous endings, intenionally leaving things open for sequels that may or may not happen. At the moment I don't have any intention of continuing it either way (I think it would kind of undercut the impact of the ending to break that ambiguity) but if for some reason I feel compelled to in the future, options are open.

Though if anyone else wanted to write an unofficial sequel or spin off work I wouldn't object.

Coming back to this fic, I've realized something interesting about my writing of Twilight in this and other fics. She's definitely the character I relate to the most of the Mane 6, so I naturally put a lot of myself into writing her when fleshing out small details, like taking super hot baths that induce mild heat stroke, which is trait I include in multiple fics. But I recently realized another consistent detail that was entirely accidental. It's obviously most explicit in this fic, but in Substitute, Then Tomorrow Came, and Heart of Loyalty, there is at least one passing incidence of suicidal ideation (even if the plot doesn't revolve around it) and in all instances, it involves jumping.

That...was not a pattern I intended to create. Disconcerting.

I believe you have struck and pulverized your target of creating a horrifying thriller. There is little I can add to the comments from others, lest I incriminate myself. Abolutely terrific!

It's always a weird feeling when our own stories hint at something we didn't know about ourselves <_<

I've heard similar things about that story before, which is interesting to me cuz I slapped it out in the middle of the night on an angsty whim without putting any kind of extensive planning into it. I guess sometimes the stars just align.

Big thankies either way though! I hope you like its sequel too


Because the faint faint voice of self preservation and self love may be a bare whisper in a hurricane. But there are the odd moments of stillness where it pushes you just as hard as anything else ever does.

Maybe those moments are disconnected and never lead to anything more. But the fact they can happen is kind of a miracle.

Shit, man. This kind of positivity is something myself and probably a lot of other people need to hear.

You're a good bean.

Boy do I know that feel. My most popular story by far remains "Pinkie Pie is an Eldritch Abomination", which according to the rankings (which I always take with a grain of salt, the algorithm being as inscrutable as it is) is sitting at 260th out of however many hundreds of thousands after 8 years (I even saw it hit 2nd for a brief second during the churn back in the day).

And I wrote that off in like 2 hours because I was procrastinating on writing a chapter of Then Tomorrow Came. I guess it hit a sweet spot of short length and interesting premise holding up well over time with evolving canon, aside from a bit about Daring Do still being fiction. I still like how it turned out, but it's still weird that it's so far above everything I sunk so much more effort into.

It seems like Twilight's suicide at the end came a little out of left field. I wasn't expecting the story to end with everybody learning self-harm is bad and living happily ever after, but twilight moves from a single instance of self burning and some curious thoughts to throwing herself off a building without anything in between.

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