Best Policy
“Ahm not angry sugarcube,” Applejack’s muffled voice tried to comfort me through the bedclothes I’d wrapped myself in, “It wasn’t yer fault, there’s no need ta be scared.”
Just kill me now, save me from this embarrassment.
I could hear the hurt in Applejack’s voice and I knew that she’d feel just terrible if she thought she’d frightened me. No matter how much my embarrassment wanted me to scream at everypony to leave me alone, I knew I had to pretend to let Applejack comfort me, so she could ‘make up’ for what she saw as her mistake.
I poked my muzzle out of the blankets. The cooler air was refreshing, but I could still smell the cloying odor of my sick hanging in the room. I could smell Applejack too, and no, she didn’t smell like apples. She smelled of rich earth with a hint of healthy sweat, scents that were quite distinct from what I was used to in the hospital.
I slipped my head out of the blankets, my pony ears springing up to attention as they were freed from the blankets.
“It’s all right, Applejack,” I said. “Don’t worry about me, I was just being stupid. I’m not scared.”
“Oh darlin’ I know yer jus’ tryin’ ta be brave, but there ain’t no need ta candy-coat the truth.” The coat on Applejack’s forelegs was damp, no doubt from washing off my puke.
Right, she could tell when I was lying. I swallowed nervously.
“I’m not afraid of you,” I clarified. “I’m just a very anxious pony.”
Applejack raised a hoof to her chest and a distraught expression crossed her face.
Dammit, why can’t I stop lying?
“Yer afraid of me?” The hurt in her voice cut me deep.
“Not because I think you’ll hurt me!” I blurted out, “I just- I’m scared because you- because you’re the element of honesty and you can tell when something is the truth and I don’t want ponies to know w- to know things.”
I probably shouldn’t have said that.
“Ah know tellin’ tha’ truth can hurt sometimes, but you’ll feel much better if you just come out with it.” Applejack lectured, “Everypony here is trying to help you - they won’t think worse of ya, no matter what yer secret is, they’ll help ya.”
“It’s not something I need help with,” I explained. “It’s something- it’s- ugh!”
I huffed in frustration.
“Being the element of honesty doesn’t give me any special powers sugar cube, ya’ll just ain’t that good at fibbing.” Applejack said, “Besides which, we returned the elements to the Tree of Harmony. Ahm not here to interrogate ya.”
“You’re not?”
Applejack turned to Dayglow and the fluorescent mare sighed.
“I’m so sorry Green, I shouldn’t have sprung it on you like this.” Dayglow apologized. “I was talking with Applejack about potentially taking you in as a foster child and I thought I’d introduce you two to ease you into the idea.”
Dayglow looked miserable too. I just spread misery wherever I go, don’t I?
“I didn’t realize you would recognize her, or that you would react so... strongly,” Dayglow explained. “I want to get you placed in a stable environment as soon as possible, but I’d never place you with somepony you felt uncomfortable with.”
Foster care? I hadn’t considered that. I’d assumed I’d be going to an orphanage. I didn’t want to take up a foster care spot that was meant for some poor foal that actually needed it.
“I don’t want to go into foster care, I’ll be fine in an orphanage or whatever.”
“I know it can be scary going with somepony you don’t know-”
“-It’s not that!” I interrupted, “I just- I don’t need it. Isn’t there a waiting list? Isn’t there somepony else that needs it more?”
Dammit, I was screwing this up. I looked over at Applejack.
“Green, look at me.” Dayglow lifted my chin so I was looking into her eyes, “You’re just as important as anypony else. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to have a family that loves you and cares for you.”
“What if I don’t want a family?”
“What do you want?” Asked Dayglow, “If you could have anything, what would you ask for?”
“I just want a safe place to sleep, with food provided, and a small stipend to cover expenses until I’m old enough to get a job.” I chose my words carefully. “If I have to share a bunk room with a few other ponies that’s fine I suppose, but I’d prefer to be alone, and once I’m working, I can pay back the money.”
I sighed.
“Look, I get it,” I preempted the response, “You’re not going to give me what I want. You’re going to do whatever you think is best for me, but you asked.”
“Huh.” Said Dayglow. “That’s not what I expected you to say.”
“What was I supposed to say?”
“Well, most fillies your age would want to be a Princess, or to have a million bits.”
“Being a princess looks like a lot of work, and taking a million bits that’s going to help orphans seems kinda evil.”
“That’s a very practical way to look at things.” Said Dayglow, “It’s a bit bleak though, don’t you think?”
“Happiness isn’t achieved by having things handed to you.” I countered, quickly converting an Earth saying into pony speak, “A beggar could be the happiest pony in Equestria while a prince who has wanted for nothing may live in misery.”
“Are you happy, Green?”
“Yes.”
“You don’t seem happy, you seem miserable. You’re anxious around other ponies, you’re having panic attacks, you don’t trust anypony enough to speak with them honestly, and from what I’ve read, since you’ve come to us you’ve spent most of your time either sleeping or crying.”
“This situation is very stressful for me, but I’m generally a happy pony.”
“I’m no Pinkie Pie, but I know a thing or two about making ponies happy.” Dayglow said lightly, “For somepony to be happy, they need to feel safe. Not just physically safe, emotionally safe. Have you ever felt safe, Green? Have you had somepony you could trust with everything?”
I could feel my mother’s cold fingers, poor circulation from her weak heart. I grasped them tightly in my small hands.
“Stay with me, Mom, I’m right here with you. Breathe. You’re going to get through this.”
She shook and kept asking me if it was all right. I told her it was, and I kicked myself for even thinking about telling her the other kids were being mean to me at school. I could imagine what Dad would do if I told him. He’d march down to the school and ‘sort out’ the situation regardless of how I’d beg him not to.
I thought about all the ways I could answer the question with another question; what is 'trust'? Is it just being able to predict how someone will respond? With Applejack in the room I figured it was best just to get it over with.
“No,” I said truthfully. “I guess I never have.”
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First ha ha, nice story btw also when is rules of engagement coming back im so hyp3d for that!
yay Green~
Saw that coming.
Great chapter! Can't wait for the next bi-weekly update!
10069233
It means a lot to hear that, since that was my goal when I set out with this project. Initially I was planning to insert myself as I am now, but being self-aware of my self-awareness created a terrible feedback loop, so I've ended up writing Green as a slightly younger, less self-aware version of myself.
0:26
And now they know you remember things. Good luck, but... they're ponies. I don't know that you'll need it.
I'm bad at emotional support but I can tell you, I feel that. I hope any results will feel/have felt worth the energy and difficulties.
Pragmatism from anything below adolescence is probably the most unexpected trait you could find.
Well, at least they got something out of her there at the end. I'll be looking forward to seeing how things go with Green at the Apple's farm, seeing how she integrates and how/if she'll get along well with the CMC... She might be mentally older, but as has been shown, her younger body IS playing havoc with her emotions. Plus, they are the ones who rescued her. So I think Green would be more than willing to call them "friends".
Ow my feels
Ahhh! The sudden shortness was like a bucket of water fallin’ on mah noggin. How could ah ever feel safe again?! Oh nuuuuuuu.
Silliniess aside, thank you!!! Ah really love this story. Ah’m just happy yer not abandonin. That will make us sad. Ew, sad.
Thank yoo.
More please?
Was expecting this to go in a slightly different direction but was nonetheless satisfied
Good old Applejack , always the first one there to get more free farm labourers.
Pleasantly surprised. You subverted the top 31 percent of possible plot branches from the last chapter, and that's awesome! We love stories that break molds while maintaining continuity, clarity, and direction.
Finding trust can definitely be difficult, especially with an adult mind and even with a child-like mentacity. Here's to the building thereof!
Keep going! ;)
Wow that was deep and very sad...
Green really needs the help. Growing up ones more in a save environment with familie and friends. 
This chapter was well worth the waiting!
Interessting i just was thinking about it and...
Only Applejack fullfills all the requirements!
Everypony else is all over the place or to bussy!
Green might find a dear friend within Spike.
Both a smart but inmature. Both are Independent enougth not to need constand watch but a helping hoof here and there. If Twilight Sparkle dont slave away Spike all the time Spike can be a great teacher since he is well read. Not to be mean but... Spike is safer than the CMC... So i suggest Spike main Companion and CMC second.
10069437
Like:
I know right? Time to check my favorites for a sweet story to chase away the sadness
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/454089/thinking-inside-the-box
Or
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/344262/the-boopening
Amazing to see chapters getting the reader so emotional! Thanks
10069618
Free... yep... its only:
Taking care of her living space, food, health, education & personal requirements after everything she went trough...
Thanks for the story. As far as i understand, you are basicly pouring out your soul, and it really shows.
Still i think Fluttershy is best choice as caretaker for Green.
I can definitely believe this is painful to write. I feel like I'm watching you vivisect your own soul with ponies as the scalpel. Don't feel you have to rush this; I imagine writing something this personal needs some recovery time between chapters.
The problem is that him telling the truth will never be taken as truth, and as such what he both wants and needs will never be available. Others will deny the truth or come up with what they want to believe.
10069811
Way to go 
She is overworked as is... Aj has time,space and familie to help Green out as well...
/////
Congratulations the story is ones more under 'popular now'!
Bravo ... can’t think of anything else to say. You get the emotions right. So right I empathize and feel them as well. So all I can say is I want to give Green a hug. This coming from an introvert Asperger’s who has trouble being touched at all some days. So that means a lot from me.
🤤 The writing style, The terms used, the character personality. I can surely have an orgasm over this delicious masterpiece.
Thanks, kisses and keep the good work.
An excellent addition to the story. I enjoyed reading how Applejack reacted to Green. I look forward to the next chapter, pls take as much time as you need/want for it.
I am so happy this updated, it might have been short, and it might have ended in another cliffhanger but it was still awesome.
Holy Moonpie! chinese translation... That impressive...
10075492
Yeah, nothing is more unrealistic than real life. "Stranger than fiction" is a real thing. Often the only way to make something unbelievable into an actual story is to add more backstory than would actually be interesting to read.
Even in this story, the only reason his/her extensive medical knowledge doesn't shatter our suspension of disbelief is that medical professions are very well known to be careers that take a lot of schooling and experience. (Even then, I've seen a few comments complaining about it.)
Urgh, no need to tell me. Not lying to yourself is hard and painful. You lie to yourself because you don't want to face the truth, because the truth hurts. If it didn't hurt you wouldn't lie to yourself.
Ignorance truly is bliss. So is opium.
In truth there is pain. In truth there is strength. Knowledge is power.
10075529
I'm referring mostly to mental control and fortitude.
I don't remember the last time I feared something that wasn't a social situation or a phobia of mine, such as spiders or heights. Pain, injury, and death do not frighten me. Poisonous animals do not frighten me, neither does hostile people. In crisis situations in the past I have been completely calm and rational, before, during, and after. No lingering trauma, no breakdowns, nothing.
Pain is completely irrelevant to me, not matter the amount. It can easily be resisted, ignored, filtered out, or disassociated at will. That goes for any physical sensation, but pain is easiest.
Emotionally some of those close to me jokingly refer to me as a computer.
I used to have anger issues. Few people I have known could get into quite such a screaming, frothing rage. I was well known for never letting go of a grudge. I hate being angry, it is the worst emotion.
Now, though? I taught myself to let go of anger to the point that I have to actively hold on to it if I want to be angry. It's like sand running through my fingers. All my other emotions can be ignored, disassociated, or removed at will. Mostly I don't, because emotions are some of the greatest parts of being alive, even the negative ones. It adds color to life's tapestry. Most emotions can be evoked with some effort as well, though it's rare that I do that. I can also turn all emotions off for however long I want, becoming completely emotionless. Apathy makes life much less enjoyable, however.
Would that seem OP/unrealistic if you read a story where the protagonist could do that?
All of this was trained, not something I was born with. All it took was, according to a back-of-the-envelope calculation I did like a year ago, about twenty-two and a half thousand hours of meditation/philosophy/conditioning/navel-gazing spread out over a bit more than twenty years.
10075712
I'll be blunt; If you can't imagine telling a story about yourself where people don't consider you a Mary Sue, that's not because you're unbelievably awesome, it's probably because the story you're imagining is showing off your strengths and not exploring your weaknesses.
I certainly understand what you mean about mental fortitude. I too appear calm, collected, able to face pretty much anything. It's something I've put years of effort into. I know myself. I know my body. I SCUBA dive with sharks without changing my breathing rate and endure hours of verbal and sometimes physical abuse from patients without feeling anger towards them, to the astonishment of those around me.
Trust me when I say, everyone has their limit. If you've reached your limit, and overcome it - all you have done is pushed that limit back, not eliminated it. Everyone has weaknesses, and if you don't know your weaknesses, or you are unwilling to acknowledge them, that in itself is a weakness. You don't have to accept weakness, but you do need to acknowledge it if you are ever going to overcome it.
If there's some aspect of life which others consider important, but you think is a waste of time, that's a good place to start looking for weaknesses.
Social situations are a huge part of life - many stories explore social situations to the exclusion of all else. Don't write a story that showcases a character's strengths, write a story that explores a character's weaknesses and how they overcome or work around them. You can absolutely write a story about a hyper-competent character, just don't make the focus of the story something they can easily overcome.
As someone who has developed your self-discipline through meditation, you know that the mind and body being in balance is critically important for this. Your body doesn't just do what you want it to because you really want it to, you have to train body, and work with your body's natural responses to achieve the mental state you desire.
Green is stuck in an unfamiliar body, a child body at that - and she's used to being in near perfect control of herself, to the extent that it's fundamental part of her identity. If I've read this right, self-discipline is something you hold as an important part of who you are too. How would you feel if you lost that? What would that force you to re-evaluate? What would that do to your sense of self worth, your sense of self in general?
Those are some of the painful questions I'm exploring with this story.
Oh, and thanks for reading! I hope I haven't offended you with this response.
10075806
Edit: Fucking hell, that ended up longer than I thought.
Sorry about the long comment. I'm rather purple when it comes to writing and this is a subject I rarely get to discuss.
I was intentionally only focusing on my strengths to illustrate how it could break suspension of disbelief. My weaknesses are manifold, the biggest ones being complacency, procrastination, and social situations. Not that I can't negotiate social situations, I can get along with almost anyone, especially face-to-face, but it is the only thing I truly fear. Ostracization, the disapproval of those I consider peers or of someone whose authority over me I recognize and accept, contacting someone with such authority when they are strangers to me (such as government agencies) about important things, etc.
Few things are more terrifying to me than being called into the boss' office when you have no idea if it's just for a chat, a need for some information, or a reprimand for some fuck up you don't remember, even if you know that it's almost certain to be for one of the former.
I disagree about the importance of the body. I consider it very, very helpful for it to be well taken care of, or at least minimally maintained, but non-critical. I think this might be because while I called it meditation that is only because I looked into various forms of meditation a few years ago and noticed that some of the techniques used were very similar or the same as what I did, but I've never followed any of the schools of thought that use those techniques. Hell, before I read up on meditation I just called what I did "thinking about things."
Most formal forms of meditation have some physical exercises included, even if it's just things like focusing on your breathing or imagining energy flowing through you, or any other such thing. I've never done anything like that, everything I do is mental. My body, and its state, are specifically and intentionally excluded from how I do things. It is just meat, a tool to carry out the instructions of the mind. It's functionallity is required to achive physical tasks, just like a tool might need to be sharpened to serve as intended, but a tool does not get a vote on what task it is put to.
I agree to the extent that my body has to be physically capable of performing the tasks I want it to and I need to have the skills to perform them, but only that far. My body, and fickle and counterproductive emotions for that matter, don't get a vote on what actions I take.
This was probably the biggest focus of my efforts and progress was slow, difficult, and came in fits and starts. Sometimes years went by without much progress, until a sudden realization came to me that unlocked a new path for progress, sometimes multiple paths in multiple areas.
Losing that would require me to lose my memories since my control relies on knowledge, not on achieving emotional equalibrium. It used to in the early days, but things like centering myself is now a primitive and inefficient technique. It's only really useful for deep contemplation.
In Green's situation, if my emotions came too quickly, were too many, and I couldn't achieve the minimal focus required to ignore/resist, disassociate, or shut one down without another taking my attention, being completely and totally overwhelmed by them, I could throw my equivalent to a master breaker and shut every emotion down.
The good goes away with the bad, however. No pleasant emotions, no ability to be comforted, no ability to be surprised or angry and therefore no adrenaline unless it was pumping before I "flipped the switch," and coming off as disconcertingly focused, calm, cold, and emotionless. It really is the mental equivalent of flipping a switch, too. It takes next to no focus and between half a second and two seconds. Now, not having emotions doesn't mean I forget who I am, what I value, or what I intended to do, but it does mean that there is no passion in it. No fire, simply persuing my goals with cold logic, making decisions, and then executing those decisions.
While the emotions that originally caused me to shut everything down are gone thanks to that, if whatever caused them is an ongoing situation, such as the frustration, humilliation, and anger from being treated like a child for example, then the emotions will be back eventually. This would force me to either remain in that state long term, not a fun prospect, or let my emotions play out and deal with them the best I can, like Green is doing. Mostly that will be successful but occasionally I might get overwhelmed, especially if I get heavy emotional hits in quick succession, like she did when AJ arrived.
Of course, since I'd rather tell them the truth and have them believe me, AJ's arrival is potentially a blessing. Anypony being able to cast a truth detection spell, even if it only tells them what I believe to be the truth, is also something of a blessing. Potentially. ("She's retreated into a fantasy world to escape whatever horrors happened to her. Poor, delusional filly. We'll make sure she gets the best therapists in Equestria. By the time they're done she'll have forgotten all about herr delusions and remember all about the horrible trauma we're sure that she's suffered.")
The best option might actually sticking with the amnesia play while just being myself and assimilating into pony society as best I can. Just ending up as that strange but friendly filly that just seems to have appeared from nowhere claiming to have no memory. Any searches for my parents or such would die down and eventually, after a few years, end.
My real hurdle would be Princesses Luna and (especially) Celestia if I had decided to pretend to be a "normal" filly. Why? Because I respect Celestia immensely, and I recognize her authority and accept it as applying to me. I don't recognize it because of something like a crown, title, or her mastery (mistressing? I don't think that's a word) over the sun. The first two are only meaningful on their own to me as a threat, meriting caution, the last makes her a goddess by my reckoning, but that only merits more caution, not respect.
Her rule over the ponies, most especially her choice to use the Elements against Luna and her rule over what seems to have been a golden age for the next millennium, is what grants her authority legitimacy to me. Me being in her lands, interacting with the ponies she rules over, is what makes me accept her authority over me. This applies to Luna as well, though to a much lesser extent for obvious reasons, in fact, most of it stems from her ruling alongside Celestia. Noooooot something I'd ever say to her face, because that could hurt her quite badly. Lying to Celestia, and to a lesser degree Luna, would be close to anathema to me. Any other form of deception would be alright, but I don't think I could bring myself to lie to Celestia's face if she outright asked me. I could refuse to answer, but to lie to her . . .
Of course, this all depends on them being more or less like they are depicted in the show. Tyrant Celestia gets no undying loyalty from me.
That being said, stories about losing your mind, having it subsumed by or merged with another, or having it outright altered are utterly fucking terrifying to me. Alzheimer's is about as close as reality gets to hell for me. Losing my memories or having my mind forcibly altered is a fate much, much worse than death to me. Because of this I see some stories with Discord, the changelings, Twilight, occassionally Cadance, Celestia, or Luna, and just about every Conversion Bureau story as horror stories, no matter what the author tagged it as or intended.
Stories like Becoming Chaos (I have never read more than a few chapters because the horror and terror it makes me feel discourages me enough to go read other, happier, things. Like Fallout Equestria or the Secret Life of Rarity), Veil of Thoughts and it's sequel, as well as one of the crown jewels of horror (to me) When a Pony Calls by Seven Fates and it's sequels. (
No link because it's appearantly unpublished now. I only found the name because I have them on my old e-book reader that I dug out.Ignore that, View Mature was turned off. Horror, terror, and disgust sum up my feelings on the story.) Just about anything by Chatoyance is pure nightmare fuel. Well written nightmare fuel but nightmare fuel none the less.Thanks for writing. I've enjoyed everything else I've read from you so it was a pretty sure bet that I'd like this. As for being offended, I wasn't. As mentioned above social things can still affect me strongly, so it did sting a bit for a while, but that's because I have, between reading your other stories and especially this one, gained some respect for you.
And I hope I didn't offend you in turn.
TL;DR My mind is a deadly weapon. *Mystical Ninja Noises* Watch me headbutt my way through this brick wall.
10075999
Tha ability to enter a dissociative state at will is something you must have practiced and, whether you realise it or not, your body has learned how to cooperate with you on that.
You may feel that your body is just a tool that you can order to do whatever you like, but in reality that is not how it works for humans. If it were you could simply choose to ignore your phobias or fear of certain social situations rather than choosing between:
a) struggling with the fear or;
b) entering dissociative state.
Fear is the most difficult emotion to control, and if you have done as much research as you claim, you will know the neurological reason for this.
Not sure where you got this from. The only research I mentioned was when I wrote "[. . .]I looked into various forms of meditation a few years ago[. . .]".
I wouldn't call sitting and thinking research.
That's kinda my point. I can do that, just by deciding to do so. I've done it hundreds if not thousands of times over the decades.
I have three things I can do with unwelcome emotions:
1. I can fight the emotion. Struggling as you called it. I referred to this as ignoring/resisting in my comment. This is the normal thing that everyone does when they try to overcome an emotion and act against what they feel or want.
2. I can reclassify an emotion as unimportant or perhaps irrelevant describes it more accurately. This is what I referred to as disassociating the emotion. Perhaps that word isn't accurate, but I've never had a need to name the things I do because no one I know gives a shit, so I haven't needed a word to describe it. This leaves the emotion in place and just as strong but it doesn't affect the decisions or the actions following those decisions.
3. I can shut the emotion down, or perhaps saying that I remove it is more accurate. This particular instance of that emotion is gone after this. The only way to feel it again is to experience an event, thought, general situation, etc, that evokes it again.
These can be applied at will to any one emotion while leaving any others being experienced unchanged. For example, if I was afraid and sad I could shut down the sadness and disassociate the fear, or affect one and leave the other unchanged.
As a side note, physiological effects such as those of adrenaline (increased heart rate, the shakes, etc) I have no control over. For example, my phobia of heights can make my hands shake, my legs weak, and my stomach do flip-flops, but it doesn't prevent me from climbing a ladder or shoveling snow off of a roof, it just means that I have to plant my feet firmly and grip tighter with my hand to avoid any accidents.
Shutting down everything (throwing the master breaker as I referred to it) removes all emotion and prevents more from being evoked until I resume a normal state. Have you ever had the kind of depression where you're completely apathetic to everything? Where you don't feel happy, sad, frustrated, angry, or anything else? The experience is similar, if not quite identical. I can't technically call it unpleasant because I don't feel anything, but a better term might be that it's a non-preferred state.
Most of the time I either deal with emotions the normal way or disassociate them, rather than shut them down. There are two reasons for this, the first is that emotions are a large part of what makes life worth living, even the unpleasant emotions, and the second is that I have a suspicion that not experiencing the full spectrum of emotions every now and then might be bad for my mental health.
That's accurate in my experience. The reason I haven't felt fear due to physical threats in a long time, disregarding the unreasoning terror caused by phobias, is because I don't consider that something worth being afraid of. I'm not religious. I have no belief in existence beyond death, so death is an end, not the beginning of something terrible. You can't suffer when you don't exist, so there is nothing about death to be afraid of.
Crippling injury is something that you will learn to work around, adjust to not having the same capabilities as before the injury, become bitter about it, suicide (assuming you have the capability or can convince someone to euthanize you), or wait until you die and it won't matter to you any more. None of which I see as things to fear. Becoming bitter might be unpleasant, though.
Taken together this means that physical threats just aren't scary to me. Well, nowadays anyways.
I want to respond to this bit, but without going into excruciating detail on every step to get there everything I write comes off as the kind of idiocy you might hear from people like Deepak Chopra or other New Age nutters.
*headdesk*
The best I can do is to say that some but not all of the blocks that make up the foundation required to be able to disassociate require practice, but the way that the technique itself works means that once you know how each of those blocks work, more specifically that they do work, the technique to disassociate only requires you to understand that it is possible and how it is done, it doesn't itself require any practice to use. Because of how it works it is as easy as flipping a switch both the first time and the thousandth.
That still sounds too New Age-ish. This is a part of why I don't talk to people about this, it just sounds like bullshit.
10078153
I figured in two decades and twenty thousand hours of meditation/philosophy you would have at least tried reading what other people have written about it.
The fear response is controlled by a part of the brain called the Amygdala. The Amygdala processes sensory information before it reaches the part of your brain which is capable of rational thought. The only way to change your fear response is through conditioning, it's one of the parts of your body which your rational mind has no control over. Conditioning, whether deliberate or incidental has been shown to change the activity and even the size of the Amygdala. People who have been the victims of abuse or suffered in highly stressful or dangerous circumstances for long periods of time have a physically larger and more active Amygdala, making their fear response harder for them to control.
Once the fear response has been triggered you can process the information rationally and calm yourself down, but doing so is a situation where you have to work with your body. Deliberate dissociation is one way which you can do this.
10078228
Never had much interest in reading about philosophy, I always found it interminably boring. A tidbit here and there, sure, but actually sitting down and studying it? Ugh. Thinking about it and talking to the few people I've know that had an interest in it is a different matter.
Besides, I didn't start off thinking about it from a philosophical standpoint but from a practical one.
I asked myself why I thought and felt the way I did about specific things because I'd caught myselt feeling a mild dislike for someone I didn't even know and asked myself why. When I found no real reason the feeling went away, but I never stopped asking myself "why do I feel this way" after that. The actual reason was mild racism I'd internalized from my parents, peers, and society, but at the time I just knew I didn't like them for being an immigrant but couldn't answer myself why that made me dislike them.
Some years after that I wanted to find a way to get rid of my anger. Since introspection had served me well up until then I turned to it again, beginning a long journey of what I like to think of as self-improvment.
I supposed that it was a rapid incidental conditioning then, because it did not take long to go from realizing that I had no reason to fear death to not being afraid of physical threats.
I have noticed that since then that other sources of fear have lost a lot of potency without any effort on my part, so I suppose that would be decreasing size or activity of the amygdala over time.
Though, it's not like I'm incapable of having my survival instinct triggered, as long as it's a complete and total surprise. My best friend is very sneaky for example, even when he doesn't try to be, to the point that he's called The Ninja at work. Every now and then he, intentionally or not, makes me jump and give me an adrenaline kick when he appears somewhere completely unexpected. Or when a certain work college went from a normal, everyday conversation to screaming in my face at the top of his lungs in a split second for no appearant reason.
If it isn't a complete surprise I don't get afraid, such as when I was in a car accident. Sure, it was over in about four seconds, but that's plenty of time for adrenaline to kick in and nothing happened.
Thinking on it, perhaps my training in mental discipline, which I'd been doing for a few years at the time, made the transition from "these are things to fear" to "these things are not things to fear" easier for my subconscious once I came to the conclusion that death wasn't scary, speeding up the process.
Keep in mind, I'm trying to remember exactly what my thoughts were and how scared things made me feel almost twenty years ago, which I also haven't had much cause to remember since.
10075712
Reading this reminded me of Milo, when he said that paid was flavor text, with no effect on stats.
... Boy, reading the rest of the comments makes me realize that autistic behavior covers a very large class of behaviors. Going non-emotional, all rational? I used to do that, had to learn to accept emotions.
OHHHHH NOOOOO YOU’RE MEEEEEEE-
Fool, that is Applejack. If you told her the complete honest truth, as crazy as it would seem to everypony else, AJ would have a "now wait a minute" moment. She might even get Twilight involved on your behalf.
10418331
No I don't think so. The truth is based on what someone *believes*, not what's necessarily true. Thus, it would be reasonable for Applejack to conclude that Green is not lying, but completely delusional. That's even worse.
But, the CMC haven't gotten their cutie marks yet. So, S4 or early S5.
Should he warn them of Tirek? Tell them not to trust Discord?
Jeez, this "filly" is REALLY clumsy.
10438985
If anything "she" should tell them to stop treating Discord like an ugly stain on their coats. I maintain that's part of why he turned his back on them for Tirek, sometimes a single friend isn't really enough to hold onto. No offense to Fluttershy, but it was her against the world. And the world kept telling her to give up on him, and Discord probably felt it was only a matter of time before she folded.
Yes, he acted like a pest but we've seen if he acts otherwise he'll literally disappear.
But does she TASTE like apples! LET'S FIND OUT!
10613908
Which totally contradicts the fact that Tirek could suck all Discord's power out and Discord didn't instantly vanish forever.
I LIKE the fact that Discord was eventually shown to be a true aspect entity, but it was done TOO LATE and AFTER they'd already done something which proved he COULDN'T be. So at Season 4, there was no reason why Discord had to be a jerk with his chaos. It wasn't until Season 7 that the sudden development changed everything. Buuuuut then in Season 9 he gets his magic stolen AGAIN and is perfectly fine otherwise! WHICH CONTRADICTS WHAT THEY SHOWED IN SEASON 7!!! GAAHHHHHHHHHH!!! This is why GOOD writers plan their show's timeline and character bios THOROUGHLY before just flinging stuff on screen.
10757081
hol up...
WHAT
You are describing what was said. The proper punctuation is this
Similarly:
should be
and I would end that sentence with a period and make it read like this:
That way the sentence isn't so long that it's an entire paragraph all by itself.
and that one should be:
Whoah, she actually told the truth for once! Progress.
The circel of lies is broken! Now the truth can come out
👍
Once again, the sheer realism in your writing is immense. The character acts exactly like an adult stuck in a childs` body.