• Published 16th Oct 2019
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Trust Once Lost - Greenhorne



When I agreed to be sent to Equestria I didn't read the fine print. I'm the wrong age, the wrong gender, and lost in the wilderness.

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You Wouldn't Like Me When I'm Green

“Wha’da’ya mean?” Asked Apple Bloom, “She’s only making fun of ya because ya don’t have a cutiemark. She does the same thing ta us.”

How could they be so naive if they were the same age as me?

“She’s bullying you because she wants to establish her place at the top of the hierarchy within the class.” I explained. “She wants everypony to respect her, and the way she achieves that is by finding insecure ponies for her to put down. Being ‘blank flanks’ is just an excuse to single you out from the rest of the class.”

“How can she get ponies to respect her by being mean?” Asked Sweetie Belle. “That doesn’t make sense.”

“Ponies always want to be part of the group.” I said. “By excluding you, she creates a group consisting of ‘everypony else’ where she’s in charge of who is included. Ponies in the group feel good about being in the group and afraid of being left out - which is why they don’t help you when you’re being bullied.”

“But then how do we get her to stop bullying us?” Asked Scootaloo

“Well,” I said, “You could throw her down a well.”

The Crusaders looked horrified.

“That was a joke.” I added.

I could see Cheerilee walking towards us from the schoolhouse, and my heart sank.

“You girls better get going,” I said, “You don’t want to be involved in this.”

“Involved in what?” Asked Sweetie Belle

“Me and Diamond were the ones fighting,” I said, “So there’s no need for you guys to get in trouble too. I don’t really care if I get suspended.”

“That... wasn’t really a fight.” Said Scootaloo. “You just kinda glared at her and then fainted.”

“Yeah,” I said, “But Diamond has been in there talking to her so she’s probably made up a whole story to get me in trouble.”

“We saw the whole thing,” said Apple Bloom, “We can tell her what really happened.”

“The truth doesn’t matter,” I said, “What matters is what Cheerilee will believe; She’ll just think you’re covering for me because you don’t like Diamond Tiara.”

“Well we’ll stick with you anyway,” Said Scootaloo, “Because we’re your friends.”

Damnit. It couldn’t be unsaid now. I didn’t want friends, but I couldn’t reject their offer of friendship, not without hurting their feelings. I was stuck now, with even more ponies that I had to keep happy. More ponies I couldn’t ignore. More ponies that I had to convince that I was okay to stop them from feeling bad. I just knew I was going to screw it up and end up hurting all of them.

The Crusaders misinterpreted my sudden withdrawal into myself and gave me a group hug.

“It’s alright.” Said Apple Bloom. “We’ll be right here with you.”

“Is using magic against a non-unicorn, like, a big deal?” I asked.

“Huh?”

“I mean, if I kicked her, instead of using magic,” I asked, “Would I be in more or less trouble?”

“She’s an Earth Pony, she’d fold you like a lawn chair.” Said Scootaloo, “Err, no offence.”

Well, that was comforting. Not only couldn’t I do magic, but I was at a massive strength disadvantage.

“Are you okay Green?” Asked Cheerilee. “I heard you fainted.”

“I’m fine.” I said

It was essentially my catchphrase at this point.

“Really?” Asked Cheerilee

“Whatever Diamond Tiara told you is a lie.” I said

“What did she tell me?” Cheerilee questioned

Great, more games. She wanted me to incriminate myself before I knew what Diamond had said.

“She told you something to try and get me in trouble because she’s bullying me.” I said

“What makes you think that?”

“Look I don’t care.” I said. “Just kick me out of the class. I don’t want to be here anyway.”

Cheerilee sighed.

“Diamond Tiara says you threatened to throw her down a well.”

“I told her she should fall down a well, not that I would do it.”

“Why would you say that?”

“Because she’s a bully.”

“And you think falling down a well would make her a better pony?”

“Only if it was fatal.”

Cheerilee winced.

“Green, please don’t joke about things like this.”

My throat was starting to hurt and I had to fight to avoid my words coming out strangled.

“I’m not joking.” I said. “I want her to leave me and my friends alone, and if she has to fall down a well for that to happen then so be it.”

Be calm. Be logical. Don’t cry.

“You can’t just threaten to kill ponies because they were mean to you.”

I fixed my eyes with hers.

Focus on the anger, don’t cry.

“I didn’t threaten anything.” I retorted. “I just think we would all be better off if she fell down a well and broke her neck.”

My voice broke on the last word. I kept staring Cheerilee down, wishing she wasn’t so much taller than me.

“You have to calm down.” Cheerilee instructed. “Why don’t we go back to my office and-”

“I don’t have to do anything!” I yelled. “I don’t even want to be here!”

I was gritting my teeth to stop my jaw trembling.

“Green-”

“Why don’t you go listen to Diamond Tiara again,” I said, “I’m sure she’s fucking calm. Then you can leave me the hell alone and stop making things worse.”

“I’m trying to help you.”

“Well, I don’t want your ‘help’!” I said. “You’re going to tell me to be ‘reasonable’ and try to get along with Diamond Tiara. I refuse.”

“Just because she was mean to you once doesn’t mean she’s irredeemable.” She said, “Ponies can change, Green.”

“Most don’t.”

“Well they’re not going to change if nopony gives them a chance.”

“That’s not my problem.” I said. “I’m not going to let her stab me in the back just because you think it would be nice if we were friends.”

“That’s not what I’m saying.”

“Then what are you saying?”

“This isn’t about Diamond Tiara,” Said Cheerilee, “Is it?”

“What’s goin’ on here?” Asked Applejack. “Are you alright Sweetpea?”

I just felt so tired. I lay back down on the grass again.

It wasn’t like anything I said mattered anyway.

“I’m fine.”

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