• Member Since 4th Dec, 2018
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

TheAncientPolitzanian


"Why in the world are we here? Surely not to live in pain and fear?" – John Lennon

E
Source

Gallus's childhood wasn't a very happy one, to say the least. With no family to speak of and nogriffon willing to take him in, he was constantly locked in a struggle against his own hunger. Fortunately for the young griffon, doing the odd job or two was enough for him to afford the food sold at the marketplace.

Unfortunately, there were days where that wasn't an option. This is one such day.


Written by TheAncientPolitzanian
Special Thanks to "Spooky"
Cover taken from S8E15 "The Hearth's Warming Club"

Chapters (3)
Comments ( 22 )
Ri2

Griffons are terrible.

9629295 No no, what you're looking for is "Griffons are jerks!" :twistnerd:

Well, let’s see where this goes. Good luck, Gallus! There’s light at the end of the tunnel for you that ISN’T a freight train if you can just make it!

This is looking a little pity-party-esque, but I'm interested to see where it goes.

9630037
Yeah, as surprising as this may sound given what I've written, I'm not a big fan of "pity parties" either. Compared to my other work-in-progress stories, this one's a bit of an outlier.

I think I subconsciously used the fact that we know things eventually start turning around for Gallus as an excuse to be a bit more "angsty" than I normally tend to be. Even so, I spent the whole time I was writing this debating if I was going a bit too far.

The second half of this story's shaping up to be a bit lighter than the first, and I'm probably going to throw in a "one year later" epilogue to wrap this mess in a happy little bow. :P

There's a little quote from another fic on this site, and I think it summarizes my general philosophy when it comes to storytelling quite well:

It may be hard at times, but trust me... there’s a happy ending coming, and it’s well worth the wait.

-Starlight Glimmer, Integration by Darth Link 22

9630077
Good answer! Death to pity parties. Long live meaningful hardships!

Not a huge fan of Gallus in the show, but I'd be lying if I didn't feel sorry for him here... I'll stick around to see if it gets better for the poor kid!

I really like your ideas on Gallus's bright blue color and how it affected his life! I always imagined that he'd get scorn from other griffons for being too, well, pony-colored, and the way you incorporate that to his lack of family is brilliant! And it also hits right where it hurts :pinkiesad2: I can't wait to see how things turn out for Gallus in the marketplace!

Comment posted by SuperPinkBrony12 deleted Sep 26th, 2019

I think I know who the "anonymous" griffon was: Gilda. :raritywink:

Poor Gallus. Statistically speaking him and Ocellus probably had the worst lives of the Young Six growing up (maybe Smolder too, but dragons seem to like the way they live their lives). Something to bond over, maybe.

I was just going to say, Gallus and Ocellus also probably know better than any of their friends what hunger is like. All I can picture with both of them is reacting to wasted food the way Kyoko from Puella Magi Madoka Magica does.

Of course, the main thing Gallus knew about is was that the griffin in charge had allegedly once left an injured pegasus to die in the Abysmal Abyss, but now didn‘t seem like a good time to bring that particular detail up.

Oops. Yeah, say goodbye to contracts from Equestria when they figure out the vendor once abandoned one of their seven Reigning Monarchs to die. :rainbowlaugh:

You really should decide which name you call our beaked-winged friends unless there's some underlying logic I didn't bother to figure out it's slightly obstrusive. (I guess even if there is my criticism still applies.) Good story otherwise though I enjoyed the first two chapters a fair bit more than the last.

It is so short for me. But it is great.

The past few weeks have gotten away from me a little, what with the finale and all, but I figured I might as well respond to everyone’s comments. Better late than never, I suppose.
:twilightsheepish:


9859520
Given what actually made it into the final draft of the story, I will concede that Gilda is the most likely candidate. However, in the earlier drafts, it was meant to be a lot more open-ended. Unfortunately, the extra scenes meant to do that were all cut.

So, in the end, all I can really say in response to your guess is "whatever floats your boat."
:)

9859534
It seems you are I were on the same page, then!

...And now I am depressed about the lack of fics about Gallus and Ocellus bonding.

9859541
Y’know, that seems like a good prompt for a oneshot. I think I might have to revisit that someday (I’ll be sure to give you credit if I do).

9859784
All part of the masterplan. Mwahaha!
:)

9859787
True.

9862622
‘Tis a fair cop. I’m glad to hear you still enjoyed this story in spite of any of the flaws it may have. Just curious, was there any specific reason you didn’t enjoy the epilogue as much, or was it just a gut thing?

9864431
Glad to hear you enjoyed it. I suppose I could’ve made it longer, but I couldn’t really think of much else to say that wasn’t completely irrelevant to the plot.


Thanks for reading and commenting, everybody! In case you’re interested in seeing more like this, I think you’ll be happy to know that I’m in the process of outlining the plots of similar stories centered around Smolder and Ocellus, with possibly more to follow. I’m currently focused on some other projects, so don’t expect to see them too soon, but I’m hoping to get at least one of them out by the end of the year.

Stay tuned!

9893116
Well it kinda took away the edge of the first two chapters. Those were a heartwrenching story about a Griffon born into a society that shuns him for something out of his controll. Trying to scrape by on whatever he manages to find displaying both his wit and physical skills honed by a lifetime of hardship.

And then cut and we're in the whisical utopia of ponyland where no harm could ever come to him ever again.

This is not a resolution, even if we know that's what was going to happen to him anyway. There was some resolution for the story with the bargain he managed to reach with the shopkeeper and I feel while it wouldn't have been a great ending it would have fitted the story more. One more thing: Details are a bit hazy so I might be recommending something you've actually done but I think you should have connected Gallus getting the pony scholarship to his thievery.

9859520
I'm more so thinking it might've been Gage if the 2nd chapter is anything to go by. And also pretty sure Gilda is likely unaware of Gallus being an ophan considering she stated in the first chapter how surprised she is that he left the house this morning.

Login or register to comment