• Member Since 4th Dec, 2018
  • offline last seen Wednesday

TheAncientPolitzanian


Proofreader and occasional writer. The sun tries vainly to stay lit for another day…

T
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As the sun sets on another day in the magical land of Equestria, an era sets along with it. One of the last remaining participants of a bygone age rests idly, bracing themselves to face whatever lies beyond this mortal coil.

Twilight Sparkle is no stranger to death. As an alicorn, one of the immortal rulers and protectors of Equestria, she's seen many dear friends come and go over the countless years. But through it all, there was one confidant she could always find solace in: Spike, her faithful dragon assistant and adoptive little brother.

Alas, not even dragons, long-lived as they are, can endure forever. Now, with mere hours remaining before Spike leaves this world for the next, the time has come for Twilight to bid farewell to the first and last of her very best friends.


Written by TheAncientPolitzanian
Inspired and preread by The Red Parade
Edited by Lord Regulus (A.K.A. Rego)
Cover Art: FiM S9E09 "Sweet and Smoky"

"Excuse me while I go and feel wistful in a corner."Astrarian

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 17 )

I'd say more, but you already know my extensive thoughts from the Gdoc. Nicely done on hitting that publish button! I am very happy to see this one come to light.

I'm crying on the inside.

Another pause. "I'm not sure. It depends on how willing Mariner, Zephyr, and Woodwork are to, you know... to take my place."

And if Twilight has any sense whatsoever, they're not all unicorns. She's smarter than that.

"And when he felt his time had come, even he found a successor of his own and passed on. As did Cadance. As did Celestia and Luna before me. As you did when you retired. And, someday, as will I.

Twilight was Celestia and Luna's, I'm assuming Flurry is Cadance's. No idea who'd want to take over for Discord. And I'm not even sure what Spike could pass on, besides wisdom.

Heartbreaking, Depressing, and Brilliant. Nothing else left to say.

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No idea who'd want to take over for Discord.

Screwball. Whoever or whatever she was.

And I'm not even sure what Spike could pass on, besides wisdom.

The position of Royal Advisor? Assuming he didn't wind up the eventual Dragon Lord. I suppose that was always a possibility.

11084466
People have an unhealthy obsession with that one-off character for some reason. I doubt it was them. We'll probably never know for any of this.

I’m not crying! It’s liquid pride I tell you!
Beautiful story!

11084233
I get the feeling Mariner is a earth pony, Zephyr is a pegasus, and Woodwork is a unicorn. Maybe founding their own cities later on. Maretime bay, Zephyr Heights, and Bridlewood perhaps?

If asked the unexpected happenings of today (and there were a few), shedding a tear or two was the least expected

AWWWWW, this was absolutely perfect. I loved every word. There was sadness yet hope and love all through this story. This is kinda how I’d want things to end between the two, if Spike was indeed the one to go first.

Also really nice nod to G5 there. It was a clever touch.

Brilliant…just pure brilliance.

Seeing as the dust appears to have settled for the most part, I figured I might as well reply to all of the wonderful comments I've received over the past few days. Wall of text incoming!
:twilightsheepish:


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I'd say more as well, but you also already know the bulk of my thoughts. I've said it a dozen times by this point, but I cannot thank you enough for all of your help. If it weren't for your input, I very well could've scared everyone off before the tenth paragraph.

Looking forward to reading the next chapter of Electro Swing!

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Ah, the Applejack approach. Befitting, especially seeing as that line came from an episode about saying goodbye.

Thanks for reading!

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And if Twilight has any sense whatsoever, they're not all unicorns.

Well, their names were supposed to be vague allusions to Maretime Bay, Zephyr Heights, and Bridlewood Forest respectively, so make of that what you will.

I'm assuming Flurry is Cadance's.

Yup, that's the implication I was making.

No idea who'd want to take over for Discord.

Truthfully, I'm not sure; that line was really just an excuse for me to transition from one plot thread to the next. I do have a few scattered ideas, but to keep things simple for now, feel free to assume it's an irrelevant OC or something.

And I'm not even sure what Spike could pass on, besides wisdom.

That was in reference to his Royal Advisor position; Spike mentions he's since retired from it during the "open book" segment.

People have an unhealthy obsession with that one-off character for some reason.

In all fairness, "having an unhealthy obsession with one-off characters" is pretty much half the point of this fandom. Nothing wrong with that, if you ask me.

Thank you so much for commenting! I really appreciated your thoroughness.

11084466

Heartbreaking, Depressing, and Brilliant. Nothing else left to say.

Thanks for the high praise!

Assuming he didn't wind up the eventual Dragon Lord. I suppose that was always a possibility.

Nope, not in this continuity. By the time Ember retired, Spike would've long since become a fully-fledged adult as well. Seeing as the Gauntlet of Fire was apparently exclusive to "teenage" dragons and younger, he probably would've been excluded. At least, that's my take on it.

Though, on a related note, I do have this headcanon that, were Ember to somehow die of unnatural causes, Spike, technically being the previous Dragon Lord, would have to assume the mantle for the remainder of her term. That could probably make for an interesting story in and of itself, but I lack the wherewithal to write a fantasy political thriller. Oh well. :P

Thanks again for reading!

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Seeing my work get described as "beautiful" still feels so surreal. I'm glad you enjoyed it that much. Thanks for reading!

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I never really decided whether the trio founded the cities themselves or if they were named in their honor later on, but that's definitely what I was gunning for!

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Nice to know my story's good enough to warrant that kind of reaction. Whatever unexpected things you're dealing with at the moment, I hope it all ends well!

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AWWWWW, this was absolutely perfect. I loved every word.

You have no idea how much this means to me. Some of those words date all the way back to April of 2020, and I'd had the idea for it since mid-Season 9 until the Flashfic contest prompted me to put it into words. In that regard, I guess you could say it's an encapsulation of the entire transitional era between G4 and G5 — a space I expect to explore a lot more as I revisit my other unfinished writings from that tumultuous time period.

It's taken me far longer to get here than I would've liked, but it's nice to know that the journey was worth it.

There was sadness yet hope and love all through this story.

That's definitely the tone I was going for. The "Sad" tag is still the most befitting, but I was definitely pushing for a "yin and yang" balance between that "sadness and hopefulness" you were talking about.

Also really nice nod to G5 there. It was a clever touch.

Funnily enough, that’s probably the only part of this story that G5 actually changed. In pre-ANG outlines, Twilight's successors were merely a pair of blatant Celestia and Luna expys; their names were never settled upon, but "Morning Glory" and "Night Phlox" were the respective placeholders I used.

For a time, I was actually really nervous about replacing them with that nod. I was afraid that the call-forward to G5 (and the implied collapse of G4's Equestria therein) would devalue Twilight's words and actions. In the end, I went through with it anyway, and so far, it seems to have worked.

At the very least, I can take solace in the fact that, judging by Zipp's old posters, the original Age of Harmony still lasted into Maretime Bay, Zephyr Heights, and Bridlewood Forest's respective lifetimes before it all fell apart. Who knows? Maybe Mariner, Zephyr, and Woodwork's own successors were the ones to blame.

Thanks again for reading! I'm glad you loved it so much.

11086679
Thank you! That means a lot coming from you.


…And with that, we've reached the end! At least until someone else decides to comment, that is. I've said it over and over again by this point, but thank you all so much for reading and commenting. You've thoroughly blown my expectations for this story out of the water in the best possible way. I'm still not sure where I'll go from here, but I'll be around while I make up my mind!

Take care, and happy holidays!
–AP

A story that tackles the topic of the passing of a family member with commensurate levels of care and drama related to the topic. The story has exquisite grammar and good pacing to follow, even if in the first half it felt like several other "Final farewell" stories, the second half makes up for it with added interest.

I suppose it makes for a fine tribute to the addendum of life, ending it so alongside someone who knew you from the beginning, having lived a full-fledged life and going away in peace. I personally wouldn't be as chill as Spike is given the circumstances but that's just a personal gripe.

"I get it." Spike flashed Twilight a cheeky grin. "Trying not to pull a complete Celestia on them, huh?"

Heck, I didn't expect a chortle coming out of this, much less an actual jolly laugh considering the context

"Plus—" She smiled up at him, and the inklings of tears began welling up in her eyes— "If it weren't for immortality, I wouldn't have gotten to watch my little brother grow up."

And then this masterpiece of a sentence, ahh, marvelous!
All in all, excellent work!

Truly a beautiful and somber emotional tale of loss, hope and those frightful moments of knowing you must carry forth.

I actually teared up and this isn’t an exaggeration. The subject of death has always been a touchy topic for me—I hate the thought that one day my loved ones will be gone more than I fear my own demise—so reading this filled me with a strange feeling of dread. Despite that I loved every word written. The topic was presented so realistic and with great respect.

Even though it hurt I’m very happy I read it.

How absurd, she mused, that such monumental movements, some totaling tens of thousands of kilometers, could ever be considered "just a little more".

taking the power of moving the sun literally really does give a certain scale to Twilight’s world

The dragon of the hour lay atop his horde, a literal mountain of riches and rarities, all of it gathered throughout the course of his long, happy life.

aww the word “Rarity” is in there!

After far too many of those seconds had passed — had been wasted — Spike forced himself to do so: "Guess this is it, huh?"

oof, glad i do not read descriptions because this a great way to drop on the reader what the story is about. the “wasted” does a great job here

"Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye." And so it was. After all, Celestia forbid she break a Pinkie Promise.

aww, love how this gives weight to what was just a silly Pinkie thing in the canon

'The end of my immortality,' went her unspoken elaboration.

oof, that gives another interpretation of the reasons why Celestia and Luna would want to retire. also solves the issue of just what retirement means for immortal alicorns, anyway

Twilight stared off into space, feeling Spike's scales atop her head. Her thoughts returned to the eternity ago when Spike was but a small, wide-eyed baby, always staring up at the one pony whose life and happiness he valued as much as his own. Even now, when she found herself the one looking up at him, the twinkle behind Spike’s eyes sought the magic and insight of his older sister.

i found this to be the most beautiful part of the story, really getting to the core of what makes this relationship meaningful. and that is all what we are in the end, isn’t it?


very poetic prose with this one. it’s the first time i’ve read an immortality angst story focusing on the Twilight-Spike relationship, and this does a great job of it. thank you for writing!

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aww the word “Rarity” is in there!

How could I not sneak a nod or two to her in?

oof, glad i do not read descriptions because this a great way to drop on the reader what the story is about.

Funnily enough, I don't think I ever really thought of it like that. Glad it gets itself across!

love how this gives weight to what was just a silly Pinkie thing in the canon

It's those benign little 'isms that so often make for the fondest reminiscence.

oof, that gives another interpretation of the reasons why Celestia and Luna would want to retire. also solves the issue of just what retirement means for immortal alicorns, anyway

I remember being particularly inspired by Fervidor's take on the age-old immortality question in Just a Sunrise, one of the many "ramifications of Twilicorn" symposiums penned in that tumultuous furrow between Seasons 3 and 4. Would recommend!

i found this to be the most beautiful part of the story, really getting to the core of what makes this relationship meaningful.

On that note, I'd be remiss if I didn't give another extra special thanks to Rego for editing this story as thoroughly as he did. Just looking at the passage you cited, I can tell you that he rewrote the sentence that ultimately became "Even now, when she found herself the one looking up at him…" more or less from the ground up, and his articulation of its main idea was monumentally more resonant than my first go at it. If you're reading this, thanks again, man!

very poetic prose with this one. it’s the first time i’ve read an immortality angst story focusing on the Twilight-Spike relationship, and this does a great job of it.

This was the first story where I really racked my brain in terms of its composition and structure, so I appreciate hearing which of those bits and pieces stuck out most to you. There's no shortage of stories cast in the exact same mold — some of them already more than a decade old, in fact — so I'm tremendously grateful you found so much to like in my own trek through the well-trod ground.

thank you for writing!

And thank you so, so much for reading and commenting on it! :)

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