• Member Since 19th Dec, 2012
  • offline last seen 5 minutes ago


This is fiction. But it is based...


Comments ( 76 )

Very touching :fluttercry:

That... that was beyond deep. That was beyond good. I honestly have no words. What I’ve already said is found wanting in how this makes me feel.
I say thank you, for this.

an amazing story almost made me cry with the amount of feels you hit

This... This gave me chills. The picture you painted was so vivid.

Just... damn. I can't find the words right now. This is amazing.

Before I read this story, I just want to say your avatar is hilariously ridiculous. Das computer!

This is, without doubt, the most perfect story I’ve ever read, and not just on fimfiction. I mean ever. This was one of the most accurate and perfect descriptions of the horrors of war, and I honestly believe that you watched Saving Private Ryan for reference of the battle scenes. This was one of the most impressive, powerful stories ever put on this website, and for that,

Thank you Flamm

Such waste of life, Gallipony

I don't...really have words, for how difficult this was to read at times. Bless all of those who gave their lives in the name of something better, only to be betrayed by their nation, their coalition, when they sacrificed so much for purer beliefs.

“You never did change, Schnee. You were only morphed by experience,”

Ehr... to morph is to change...

Every bit as chilling, engrossing, and touching as the original.

That was amazing! Rarely do I feel much from fics, but whew I sure felt that!

Second and final installment of the 'Flower Mare' series.

A little saddening... But she had a good run

On a side note: fittingly Day of Infamy is on free weekend. Everyone can have a taste of the war.

As soon as I read the poem at the end, all I could think of was "Flanders Fields".

I cannot stress this enough, this went above and beyond the first story, and any other discretion rating would've hindered the impact of such intense and chilling words. It just... phew, there are no words to describe what I'm thinking or feeling right now.

Just... Wow.

Thanks for writing this! It was an experience from start to finish, and from the quality of "The Flower Mare", I just knew this would be good. There were a few misspellings, such as one "incoherent", but other that, amazing. Top tier. Fantastic!

Thanks for showing I had missed putting something in there to make a more complete sentence. Fixed it. Thanks!

Once I found it I knew I had to modify it and make it my own... without question!

I get two things when I see the image.

Left: Aftermath of activating the GECK in Fallout 3
Right: The Courier from Fallout New Vegas.

I know, I have issues.

One thing that is a bit "off" lets say is that the most sensible course of action for a Unicorn faced with a gas weapon would be to cover it with a telekinetic bubble, and it would make sense to TEACH that quite extensively...

True, but panic and disorientation has a knack of throwing our training out the window.

Very good catch though

You know, there is a slight inconsistency with your account. Namely, what happened with Red.
The gases typically used in WW1 were chlorine, phosgene and yperite.
Chlorine is heavy, visible, has strong odor and can be reasonably survived simply by standing up and holding wet cloth against your face.
Phosgene is clear and has only vague odor of "mouldy hay", but it is not quick-acting - phosgene poisoning may take up to 24 hours to kill.
Yperite is a vesicant and would`ve gotten to Schneeblume just as badly as to Red, if not even moreso, as it would readily get into open wounds. Not to mention that it, once again, is not instantly lethal.

Instead, your description follows what happens when you get hit with nerve agent. Sarin, for example. But those weren`t around until WW2.


In conclusion - while gas warfare used to be a good way to terrorize the troops at first, it proved itself to be a lackluster mean of offence. According to British records, the casualty rate of gas attacks averaged to about 5% dead and invalided out. Roughtly two thirds of troops under gas attack were already in combat-ready state within the next two months.

These aren't perfect allegories to WW1 by any means. I figured there were other more dangerous chemicals and magically charged agents that could be used. I left it purposefully ambiguous... and that's kind of the 'fun' of it in a morbid sense: ambiguous changes in a magical world that made a world of difference.

Also helps prevent me from having to go into a full explanation later. You are very correct though

Frankly, I think I`d actually avoid quickly killing gases, if I were planning to use them. Why? Well. Dead is dead. Wounded, however? Ones that scream for help? Tie up even more of enemy`s resources. Manpower, medical supplies, food, lodgings, morale. All of those, drained much more severely then what would have had happened if they died where they stood.
As a rule of thumb, one does not want to kill enemy army. One wants to wound as much of the army as possible so that they don`t resist anymore, but are able to recover and contribute to industry once the conquest is complete.

but I was all ways told that in times of panic or disorientation. you always fall back on your training. and I agree with that. its familiar.

Oof. Right in the emotions. It makes you just wanna' jump in and hug Schnee.


I'm reminded of something I heard once... Right after World War I one of the higher-ups had a chance to visit (or was told to) Ypres. His reaction was something along the lines of "My God! We sent people into this?!"

Also, no rolling barrage? No box barrage? I suppose if this mirrors some of the last actions taken late in 1918, then Alemaneia was out of resources and ponypower after their successes earlier in the year, and subsequent complete reversals. They might not have been able to accomplish such advanced artillery tactics with - as the story stated - what they had left.

God, I'm almost scared to read this.

Well technically they were hammering the enemy trenches right up until the shock troops were upon them. The poor barrels of the artillery at the moment prevented accurate creeping barrage


We have no evidence stating that telekinesis blocks air or gasses. Otherwise holding her friends in telekinetic fields like we've seen Twilight do would cause some level of asphyxiation. Or Starlight, to herself, yet she can breathe and talk.

Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.
You can infer that it may be permeable. Or that the aura shown is NOT the barrier itself.
I was thinking to the typical dome barrier used quite often. Not the simple tk commonly used.
It is simply not stated.
Another issue with gas weapons is the presence of Pegasi who can generate wind with almost pinpoint accuracy, making the use of gas unreliable...

Its easy to think that but in the study of tragedies through out the years it seems like more people die than there should be and its because people cant cope with the rapid and intense changes in the environment. That counts for about 70% of people, 20% can think about it and rationally get out of the situation, and the other 10% panic or have a break down that causes more damage.

I was a combat medic in the army, I watched trained people panic and make mistakes that got themselves killed.

Your statement is a true war time philosophy, Snipers in Afghanistan would start by shooting the first soldier in a non-lethal way. Then, when someone runs out to save their friend and comrade that is when they take the kill shot. I watched it happen to many times.

As a war vet, this story has meaning for me. Thank you for writing this.

Hell, werfer, I know why I followed ya, but this. This hits a bit too close. How did you do that? How did you caught that feeling that permeats the battlefield, when you think everything is but a bleak nothingness but you still go on absolutely automatically, with brief moments of clarity and extreme psychological shock? I can't believe that you just gone and thought that up, there have to be something.


This really makes me wonder what exact sources were drawn in for your inspiration, because the troops and battle of Seele reads like one of the German offenses of early 1918, yet the general premise and timing reads more like a land version of Tirpitz' aborted last hurrah of the navy.

Either way, my imagination keeps replaying the battle scenes, trying to grapple and cope with everything you evoked. I'll be mulling over this story for a while yet.
Good job touching us readers so deeply.

Well, yeah, that`s how you do it. IF you know they have no range to shoot you back, that is. And if they do, you pick the most useful one, blow their brains out and get the fuck out of dodge before they return the favor or get a mortar shell into place.

The inspiration was actually Operation Michael of Kaiserschlacht if it achieved ALL of it's objectives. Except these objectives we're steamrolling the enemy with no regard for your own casualties and tossing them out of your land


Ah. Makes perfect sense. Threw in a little 1914 Christmas on the western front for poignancy too, eh? All in all, very enjoyable, if saddening.

I had to listen to this about half way through reading this wonderful story.

Jesus Tapdancing Christ! You actually made my eyes get a bit moist. Not an easy task.
Not exactly sure what I expected when I ran across this, but this wasn't it.
I had never read the prequel before, so when the description said something about her telling the CMC's about the day she died, I was thinking it was going to be some weird supernatural shit going on, and I'm all about the strange. Still, I was not disappointed in the least.
I think I'm going to click that "follow" button now.

Wheeew... once more I find myself unable to properly write out how I feel.
Damn... this was a good story man, and I really like this character, the story, that horrors of war...

It was good.

Good work man.

I'm happy you found it as such. Thanks for reading :twilightsmile:

You're most welcome--and thank you for reading and telling me how you felt :twilightsmile:

And I'm glad I'm doing something right to evoke these emotions. Thank you :pinkiegasp:

Once in a while I can surprise :raritywink:

Thanks again dude. I'm really happy you enjoyed it

Those are some powerful words there... and while I feel you may be giving me a tad too much credit, I'm still humbled that you feel this way. Thank you so much for your thoughts and for reading! :pinkiehappy:

Oh and no, I didn't watch that movie for this. It's still a great movie though

"How many wasted lives?! How many dreams did fade away!
Broken promises--they won't be coming home.
Whoa mothers wipe your tears. Your sons will rest a million years.
Found their peace at last as foe turned to friend and forgave."

Lest we forget.

Thank you for reading and your thoughts :twilightsmile:

That's what I was hoping to go for. Thank you so much!

And thank YOU for reading, man! I always enjoy your thoughts on my stuff :twilightsmile:

Wow... I knew that this would be something special, but I was still blown away. I've never been in a war, and I hope I won't be - as much as playing soldiers (digitally and roleplaying) can be, the real thing is hell I would never want to experience.
And the memory Schnee went through was horrifying indeed - the day she lost everything but her life.

But the following conversation, and Scoots' sneaky pinning of the badge on Schnee's coat, had a great effect - she found that, regardless of the side, there's respect for soldiers.
... at least unless you're a self-righteous ass. Which she wasn't, and she has found a kindred spirit from the opposite fraction who held no hard feelings. That was definitely a start of something that could bloom into something beautiful.

And so, Schnee was able to fully appreciate what she has now... even more so than before.

Beautiful, beautiful work :twilightsmile:

Yes CMCs, bury her in comforting, sympathetic snuggles!

This was a very good follow-up to its predecessor. I can't say I know the horrors of war, but it's well told from an outsider's perspective at least.

One minor error I noticed though, at least it sure seems like an error from context:

Artillery had completely wiped out initial resistance or forced it rearwards. If it was the former, Schnee presumed they would be on their way back presently.

I think you meant 'latter' here, as the former wouldn't result in concerns about them returning....unless you were referring to zomponies or something XD

"Wet cloth"
Wet with what? You left that detail out.
Also chlorine gas was really nasty because your choice in it was stay down and risk losing your lungs or stand up and risk losing your head.

Any liquid will do, actually. They initially used water, then some enterprising soul figured out that pissing on the rag makes it work even better.

Regarding gas - that dubious distinction is not unique to chlorine, and is generally shared among all the gases ever used for warfare. They have to be heavier then air to flood the trenches and foxholes, after all. Otherwise, they`d just rise in great plumes and serve no reasonable purpose.
In that regard, mustard gas was far nastier then chlorine simply because it attacked skin with equal ease, not just lungs. Gas masks don`t help much against it, gotta be full-body gear.

Login or register to comment