• Member Since 21st Nov, 2016
  • offline last seen Wednesday

Silver Inkwell


"Take me away to a dream and I will live like it was real, wake me up to reality and I'll live it like it was a dream."

Comments ( 17 )
JackRipper
Moderator

What happened to your policy regarding clop stories? :unsuresweetie:

Something change your mind?

8048259
IDK.
I just don't know what went wrong...
:derpytongue2:

JackRipper
Moderator

8048261
Hope I didn't corrupt the little purity you had left. :ajsmug:

8048269
Nope, just when I though I wouldn't do any ever again, here I am in my worst fic yet (yes, even worse than Sunlight Solace)

Sentence structure is a little janky in spots and you should see if you can get someone to look it over for some direct feedback on how you approached stuff, but it was otherwise a decent short story and a cute little read.

I think I've said this before, but wait a day or two before you start posting your story to groups. Then only do certain ones at a time. If you JUST published it, and then you see 30 notifications for it in feed, it's kind of a turn off. I'm not sure how many you added it to, but it's in 53 groups. 53. No one is going to want to read it, because it feels like your forcing it on them. Rather than telling them about it.

Wait a couple days, and then bring it back. It's more of a reminder, and it helps give others a chance to actually see it that way. If you do it all at once, then it's easily forgot about.

21 F words.
4 d---s
3 damns.

I guess that you could say that I fucked up...
YEAH!!!

8048438 Sees this on the New Feed. Thinks to myself "Goddamit, not this again..."

Checks story now. Like to dislike is what I'd expect. These kind of stories always rub me the wrong way, not gonna bother to read it. Looks at comments. Sees 8048438.

You have re-won my respect good sir.

Looks like this story turned out to be pure ass.

8049065
Hey, if you're not willing to laugh at yourself and make jokes and say "This was crap, I know it as crap, I'm sorry, I was bored,"
then why bother to write at all?

This story is now in my Top 20 Most Hated/Disliked Folder

I like the story. Only thing I didn't like is how short it is and how undetailed it is. When we read a clopfic, it has to have the best descriptions that you can give as possible. If this is all you can dish out, try harder. If you get stuck, use the internet for inspiration(not porn videos, they never work for most people. just other erotic stories from professional short story writers; Lelo's blog site for example).

Again, I like the story, but from how it looks, I can't give it a thumbs up.:heart:

Dude, Why did you add that whole ol' deal about dave?

So the human tag is effectively pointless.

Change the names of Charles and Dave to something more pony-esque, and drop the human tag and it will really and truly change nothing about this fic.

8343063
because the human has wings and that takes me out of it all

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