The only chapter.
It wasn’t fair.
Celestia stared down from the parking garage roof, watching the humans as they moved about their daily lives. The sounds of reconstruction were echoing throughout the streets of New York, new pavement and buildings were being raised from newly supplied materials.
It had only been a year since the ‘Solar War’ had ended, and the humans were already tearing down the ruins and throwing up new buildings to replace them. Celestia gave a sad chuckle at how her part in their history would be called forever more. Solar Queen, Solar Tyrant, equine supremacist… human killer… each one she undoubtedly earned.
When she had first watched humans she had been filled with such loathing. Their furless bodies, their violence, their intolerance… it was all that she had been able to see. It had taken the war, and her… punishment to see their capacity for compassion, and their almost magical talent to survive anything.
It still puzzled her why she had never tried to look closer at them. Why had she felt such rage, such hypocritical intolerance on her own part? They were locked a whole dimension away from her… from Equestria. They posed no threat, even if they were as violent as she had believed then. Why did she devise the potion, knowing it would trap them screaming inside sycophantic shells?
The memory of those empty smiles, those blank eyes… the sights of murder in her name… it made her want to vomit.
Celestia turned her eyes down, spying a man and woman holding hands as they walked close together. A young married couple, she guessed. Her heart ached, remembering how she had so easily deceived Cadance and Shining Armor into joining her crusade. And with that memory, other painful recollections poured forth, and Celestia couldn’t stop them.
She had lied to Twilight, and used her trust to help devise the barrier. Luna had gone along with her until she uncovered the truth, and when Luna had tried to talk some sense into her sister… Celestia had left her sister a petrified statue. That memory especially bit at her… she had even called her sweet, loving Luna a sniveling traitor to Equestria before doing it.
Why, why had she been so filled with hate?
Celestia bit her cheek, her eyes moving to the ledge, wishing she could simply leap and end this sad existence. She knew she couldn’t. Twilight’s own contribution to her punishment wouldn’t allow her to. She had tried once before with a kitchen knife, and it would end with the same result. With her safely walking away. Alive, unharmed, and quietly suffering behind a smile.
Where did Twilight Sparkle learn to be so cruel?
Celestia knew. It had been her final lesson to her former student. One she would give anything to erase. Not for her own sake, but for the sake of both worlds.
She wondered how Equestria was handling the realization of what it had been a part of. The nobility had gone along with it, eagerly. Some of them had even openly kept Newfoal servants as status symbols. Now? She only hoped they shared a similar punishment.
She looked down at her hands. Not hooves, but slender, delicate digits. Grime was etched under her nails, and she could feel her skin was uncomfortably dry from her work. It had been hundreds of years since she had done menial labor, and if she kept quiet and kept to a healthy diet… she might live another sixty.
The chance to live as an ordinary citizen, to get her hands, or hooves dirty… how many times had she envied the common folk of Equestria while she sat on a golden throne? She had glorified it while she bathed in luxury. Now, she was a dishwasher at the same homeless shelter which she lived. How many humans would love to see the self-entitled Queen Celestia, Bringer of Salvation and Harmony reduced to this?
And yet, Celestia didn’t think it was fair.
She deserved far worse for what she was clearly guilty of.
When… whatever had caused such hate had been purged in the final battle, she had openly pleaded for the worst for Tartarus had to offer. The human concepts of Hell, the worst torments possible by mortals on her immortal body would be exactly what she deserved. She had subjugated half of a world, and robbed her subjects and loved ones of their innocence. Four billion humans were dead, and civilizations thousands of years old were expunged from the face of this planet because of her.
Death would have been too kind, but… to be turned into a human?
She could still hear the voice of Twilight Sparkle as she sat in judgement over her at her trial.
“Celestia, this court finds you guilty of all charges, and hereby renders its judgement. Your magic will be forcibly removed, and you will be branded with a mark of magical apathy so that it will never return, and you will never be a threat to anypony again. Since you have caused such widespread death among the human race, I can see no greater punishment than to condemn you to the form you sought to wipe from existence. You will be banished from Equestria to Earth, alone, anonymous, and enchanted so that you may not take your life or take actions that would cause your premature death, nor will you be able to reveal your identity. You will be alone, penniless, and dependant on the sympathy of the human race.”
Since arriving, Celestia had only known shame. Every kind act shown to her was met with begrudging acceptance. She didn’t deserve any of it. She had wanted to die on that first winter night, but her enchantment couldn’t allow her to refuse a warm place at the shelter.
“You shouldn’t feel this way.”
Celestia looked up, she hadn’t spoken, yet it was her voice.
“Twilight was wrong to spare you. You might be able to kill yourself, but you could continue our divine work.”
Celestia gasped as she saw her reflection in the glass of the adjacent building. Not her human reflection, but the mirror image of her at the height of her crusade. The golden shimmering mane, the masterfully crafted armor, the look of seething loathing for her surroundings… had she really looked like that?
“They think you’re one of them, what better cover could you ask for?” The image spoke without speaking, “A bomb in the right place could wipe out a fair number of them. Who would expect the filthy wash woman?”
Celestia shook her head. No. No more killing. No more death. Whatever this thing was, she would not listen.
The Celetia in the glass seemed to twist its mouth into a cold grin, “You know you loved it. The power, the control.”
Celestia clamped her hands over her ears, but it did nothing to silence the voice.
“But, what am I saying? Of course you did. I’m you.” Not-Celestia tittered, “Twilight wasn’t so thorough as she thought. Of course there are ways around a mark of magical apathy. Since earth has been exposed to so much magic there may be a way to counter-”
“No.”
The proud reflection lost its smile. “What?”
“Yes, there might be a way, but I will not take that route.” Celestia stated, “I deserve this fate.”
The reflection glowered at her, “You deserve to be a queen. These humans kill and maim each other over the pettiest things, and as ponies they were always so willing to help.”
“They didn’t have a choice.” Celestia countered, now facing her twisted image with a glare of her own.
Not-Celetia turned her nose up in a manner that Celestia had seen a million times by the Canterlot elite.
“A delusional mare dying of thirst may refuse water. If you don’t force her to drink, then you are responsible for their fate.” The mirror-Celestia stated in a voice as cold and sharp as glass.
“The only delusional mare here is me.” Celestia snorted, “Whatever you are, you have no power over me. I’ll decide what I do.”
“And who are you?” The reflection mocked, “You are Celestia de Sol, the mare who should be Queen of Equestria and Earth, you should have won this pathetic war but you dragged your hooves! You should be relaxing in Canterlot, watching the Newfoals clean their world for our ponies arrival, and allow them to worship you like the savior you are!”
The disgust was now boiling in Celestia’s cheeks, and she stood tall and proud for the first time in a year.
“That mare is dead!” Celestia shouted, not caring who heard her. “I’ll never ever be her again, and I never want to be!”
All it took was a blink, and the Celestia in the glass was gone.
Celestia shook with rage as she sank back down to the garage floor, holding herself as she shook.
“Never… never ever again...”
The sound of the stairway door opening caused Celestia to turn her head to see Mitch, a young man from the shelter’s volunteer staff exit. She wanted to duck behind a car, and avoid him, but he spotted her and rushed across the parking spaces to her.
“Jane, there you are! Frank told me he saw you come over here.” He smiled, seeming to be relieved at finding her, “Dinner prep’s about to start, and we need you there.”
Celestia stood, not wanting to look the young man in the eye. The warm, polite way he spoke to her was almost too much for her to bare.
“I’ll be down in a moment. I… just wanted some time to myself.” She lied.
“Are you okay? It sounded like you were shouting.” Mitch asked.
Had he been spying on her, only jumping in when she had shouted at… whatever that was, or had Mitch genuinely just coincidentally stumble upon her as IT had left her?
It didn’t matter.
Celestia turned to him, “I’m… better than I came up here, I think.”
Mitch seemed unconvinced, “Listen, Jane… I know things are rough, but… you can always talk to me, right?”
Celestia shook her head, “No, really. I just had a lot on my mind, and needed to get some things sorted out.”
Celestia moved past her co-worker, “Come on… I’m hungry, and I don’t get to eat until everyone else gets a plate.”
Mitch chuckled as he followed her, “You know you could eat something while we prep everything. You don’t have to starve while everyone else eats.”
The woman shook her head, “Maybe, but it doesn’t seem fair any other way.”
---
END
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*tfw someone posts a good TCB story*
What does tcb mean? I've literally just learned this acronym
Interesting. I liken this.
To be honest, I don't know what to make of this. The Celestia we get is supposed to have gone through a complete revolution of character, apparently going from benevolent ruler to genocidal conquerer and back to decent person again. I mean, it felt like the story had something of a voice close to the Celestia we know, but the presence of that backstory is a bit weird because well...
It asks this question, but no answer is ever given, or hinted at. Considering how completely Celestia denounces this and seems to hold absolutely none of her previous contempts... it's a bit jarring. It made me ask myself if you did know that answer yourself. I would have preferred a hint. Yes, it's the general premise of the TCB, but there are a dozen versions of her motivations alone. The hallucination didn't help. In the end, I'm left thinking maybe she was influenced in some ways. Or maybe not.
That is not to say the premise is not interesting. It's that simple and delicious irony at work here, but the story feels like it was written at a weird place in the narrative. Yeah, I'm just... I like what it does, even if there are parts that are misses for me.
7794549 The Conversion Bureau. Its a series of fanfics based on ponies invading earth and forcibly turning humans into ponies.
7794576
Well, it does depend on the interpretation. The 'pony invaders' angle was part of wave 2; IIRC Wave 1 was more, I guess...idealistic? The barrier was an accident rather than an invasion in those.
I'd like to do something like this to some of the U.K,s politicians.
7794700 Right, but I was speaking in general.
Not bad, original.
This is one of those TCB fics that have been done just right. Wonderful job!
So did those nobles get punished as well
I like this little tale.
7795912 I imagine all her supporters were punished severely. But... we'll never know.
An interesting take.
Nice.
So Celestia wanted to kill all humans? That's kinda what genocide normally means. Isn't this kinda OOC for her?
7801007 Look at more Conversion Bureau (TCB) stories and you'll understand. x3
7801404
7801404
Oh I know all about it.
Someone wrote a 'human transform into ponies' story involving portals between worlds and potions. People keep mistaking his word for misanthropic, and is so ashamed that he never finished the fic. Then people with severe personal issues wrote multiple stories that were also interpreted as misanthropic, or had humans as the bad guy. Then people began to wrote absurd amounts of Human Wank fiction (when they could just be reading the light novel series GATE or watching the anime of the same name of they want the same feeling of watching a low-key fantasy kingdom invade a modern one and get obliterate, I'm sincerely surprised they aren't writing fics for that series instead but I guess it's not mainstream enough to get much attention), which has Equestria be obliterated again, and again, and again, and again by the naturally superior humans and their technology.
Meanwhile, no one bothers to write a story where cultural clash can be used interestingly, and where trans-species ponies have to deal with new instincts, and Equestria has to deal with these trans-species ponies, and some who might not consider them true ponies, and their new religions, ideas, politics, and the much larger voting block they represent. (Trans-Species Ponies who eat meat? Imagine the shockwave that would cause in Equestrian culture.). Instead, they have laser like focus on the idea of "low key fantasy kingdom invaders the modern world and is crushed."
And the 'humans turned into ponies' is pretty much just a Narrative Macguffin, it could be replaced with ponies wanting to steal all of humanity's pizzas, and it would have the same effect on the narrative, since the 'humans becoming ponies' isn't the point of the narrative. The point of the narrative is ponies being obliterated by the overwhelming superior might of humanity.
This also carries the painful stereotype of officers in WW1: where fundamentally stupid or insane officers who send innocent soldiers to their deaths against machine guns. The idea that officers LEARNED from what was going on, and both sides were scrambling to figure out how to make best use of their new killing tools, never occurs to most, where instead, it's treated with hindsight 20/20, where WE see all the mistakes they were making, and therefore think that the mistakes must have been obvious, and therefore, they were stupid or insane for not seeing the obvious.
Why does every single Conversion story have to have the transformation into a pony have to kill the person's personality? Why? That wasn't even in the original story. The idea of people having to deal with new instincts, along with losing their old ones is an interesting narrative idea worth exploring.
Basically, the CB setting is one where the original story was grossly misinterpreted by both sides, then people began beating on, and beating on, and beating on, forever, long after it's a corpse.
Conversion has NOTHING to do with the story at all!
Show me a story where humans had to become ponies or go extinct, and then having to deal with their new instincts and abilities, along with the frustrating problem of having lost their fingers, and thus having to adapt our technology to compensate!
The human wank fans should just be watching GATE. While the misanthropics should just be watching Blue Gender.
7794576
7794549
Actually, the actual story was:
Equus and Earth's universes accidentally crash into each other. Equus began to absorb Earth. Humans are found to be unable to survive in Equus' environment. Desperate to save lives, ponies create a potion to transform humans into ponies. There.
The rest had been added onto by people who want either the superior ponies and their magic are shown to be just better than humans, OR the superior humans and their technology are shown to be just better than ponies. They also added the idea of the transform killing who the person used to be. And also then added that Celly did it on purpose for INSERT INTERCHANGEABLE REASON HERE!
7794700
It's a pity everyone has forgotten about that, and just jumps on the idea of Humanity's Superior Technology crushing the stupid invaders who never had a chance to begin with.
7794574
The general premise of TCB had nothing to do with Celestia wanting to wipe out humans because ponies are superior. That was added in later by others. The species change was supposed to be literally the only option left to save lives after the world ACCIDENTALLY crashed into each other.
7801462 Whoa there, sonny boy! We're not here to kill each other. We're all fans here. That being said, I can understand covering all aspects of a story idea. And a small correction, the human voting block doesn't matter because The princesses are the sole rulers of Equestria, and even if they aren't, all the kingdoms present have rulers other than the everfree, and the humans can't live there without being forced to learn how to survive against all the monsters, which would require some of them to either die learning about it, or be placed under the rule of Zecora, the only one to be able to survive and actually live there. This would of course, still nullify the human voting block, especially considering Equestria doesn't have one. In equestria, ones capability as a princess and ruler is decided by both that person's qualities and their use of those qualities. The only way the human voting block would matter is if the writer did in fact did pull a GATE move and make them try to colonize another world. The Conversion Bureau aspect should matter, yes, and I agree that because it should, it should be explored to its fullest. However, what I don't agree with is your wanting precious fandom members to do something that they do not see fit to do. I would also like to gently point out that while I do respect your opinion on TCB's, I believe that you do not have the power to decide what is interesting for other people. You only can decide for yourself. If your opinion is that some are uninteresting fine, but do not assume to speak for the entire fandom my fellow brony friend.
7801468 yea... So it goes, alas
7801479
Your point? I am well aware of what started the conversion bureau, thank you. Yes, the original premise only had unfortunate implications by accident, but as you said, it was discontinued and disavowed by the author. However, really, I don't care too much about that. When I say 'general premise', I mean 'GENERAL', aka the majority, aka what is happening today. Nowadays, the premise is a setting for a human vs pony conflict, with the threat of cultural and species wide genocide. Celestia and the ponies are always out of character, whether by pro or anti ponies. It's kind of part of the deal. The conflict can't happen otherwise.
You want to know WHY people don't write all those wonderfully complex stories about trans humanism and cultural clash? Because everyone knows what TCB is! When you write TCB fics, you invariably will attract the attention of pro, antis, and one side is gonna bash you for doing things 'wrong'. Who wants to kick that beehive nowadays? There are plenty of ways of doing it without putting TCB in that story's name.
I mean, if you want to see it so bad, you know what they say: do it yourself. Write that big, long complex fic about all those themes, make it so popular people associate TCB with that, and VOILÀ! Don't come ranting on other people fics about how they misused a fanfic premise because they're not writing what you want. If you take five seconds to reread my comment, you'll notice I tried to offer criticism that is linked to the fic's premise itself, that is of a Celestia that went to the deep end and has seemingly began to pull back into a more moral character through her punishment. I'm only suggesting a more detailed look into her past motivations/character development. You're basically saying this is only an OOC Celestia fic that is not being written to your specifications.
Ah, that would be the misanthropic author of the original Conversion Bureau. I'd LOVE to see a satire where that author is made to pay for the crimes committed against both human and ponykind by the author's clear psychosis.
But really, I find it disappointing that people are so quick to buy into the notion that Celestia would ever to anything the TCB suggests when all evidence is to the contrary. They wrote all manner of ludicrous revenge fics, never bothering or perhaps not even capable of looking outside the fiction to the delusional mind responsible for the original and placing the blame where it truly belonged.
Ah well, I suppose I can't expect mere humans to comprehend according to my exalted level of supreme evolution. (Alondro converts all humans to clones of himself... "I give you, the Master Race! Now everyone... is ME!! HA HA HA HA HA!!!" And there was much rejoicing.)
i40.tinypic.com/21kgnr7.jpg
7801527
Well maybe YOU'RE not. Some of us have different hobbies, you know! (stacks more heads in his creepy basement)
7794576 And even the original made no sense at all. It had a horrendously forced, severely pretentious attitude and an utter misunderstanding of Celestia's character, even for as little as we knew at the time.
With what we've learned of her since, she would be APPALLED at the idea of doing such a thing (she was furious with Twilight for misusing the "Want It, Need It Spell" after all.
I don't see any point in continuing the false, feeble premise any longer other than to mock how ridiculous it was. And then mock the Super Unstoppable Human backlash fics which managed to be even worse.
This is one of those cases where both sides suck.
8499098
Um...yeah. Hilarious. You do know how old this comment is yes? Although I do applaud your comedy
8499117 I've had people reply to comments I made 4 years ago on stories I don't even remember anymore!
8499125
Oh.
8499111
yeah. I dug into this story's history after posting this. But I'm not sad I wrote this. And you're right, TCB does not work on a fundamental level. it'd take a mass form of mental manipulation to turn a vast majority of the population into sycophants to Celestia. Even if Celestia went crazy, Twilight wouldn't necessarily walk lockstep into the darkness, and Luna would see the evil a mile away. The only way it'd work is if Celestia was corrupted, then corrupted most of Equestria and either killed, corrupted, or confined Twilight, Luna, and Cadence, and Discord. Even in a world where Celestia and Canterlot have been defeated (What, 3 times now not counting the comics?). Celestia would get sent to the moon for a thousand years after killing more than a handful of humans.
This was just a quick story that kept coming back to my mind, and I wrote it to keep it from coming back. I do enjoy the irony of crazy ol' Celestia being humbled by being stuck in a human body after killing millions/billions. That's the whole draw, I suppose.
8499175 Funny thing is, if you made a story where LUNA was the one who stuck with being NMM and then forcefully turned humans to ponies, you'd be despised by everyone.
Even though becoming a despot and trying to force everyone to love her is kinda NMM's shtick in the first place, and this would be a vastly more reasonable development that mild-tempered Celestia just deciding to invade another universe for no sensible reason.
And if Celestia did this because of 'corruption', then as with NMM and Sunset Shimmer she's have to beforgiven instantly after getting blasted by the Rainbow Laser of Destiny and crying for a minute. That's how the show does this sort of thing, after all and no one has a problem with redeeming those villains immediately.
I note not merely a little hypocrisy on the part of the anti-Celestia crowd. (It's cuz Celestia's white. Closest reverse racism!)
This is beautiful.
9559299
Thanks.
Very good. A shame nobody else has played with this idea.
So, Celestia was corrupted, much like Luna ith Nightmare moon, it seems. Nice.