Therapy
Therapy
Admiral Biscuit
Just a quick trip, Cheerilee had told herself, but of course shopping never turned out that way. The trunk of her car was already loaded with purchases, and she still had two more stops. First, Hallmark, and then the grocery store.
The parking lot outside the strip mall was about half full, and rather than be one of those people who kept driving around hoping a spot near the front would open up, she just parked in the first open spot in her row and walked. Even though she was on her feet all day at work, it never felt like she was getting as much exercise as she ought to.
The store was mostly kitsch, although she did love their Hearth's Warming ornaments and bought one each year. Most importantly, though, they had a good selection of Paddywax Candles, which was the purpose of her visit. Last night when she'd been grading homework, her old candle had finally gutted out for the last time.
She was almost to the candle section when she saw a familiar face browsing the racks of greeting cards. At first, Miss Cheerilee didn't recognize her, and almost passed her by. It was one of the drawbacks of being a teacher. Sure, they all laughed at the thought that their students didn't recognize them outside of the classroom, but it went beyond just students—she'd gotten so used to only seeing her fellow teachers at Canterlot High, she never thought of them anywhere else. Of course, just like her, they all had home lives and had to go out shopping sometime. Just like she was.
She fought down a little giggle. “Miss Harshwhinny?”
The blonde woman jerked her head up and set down the greeting card she'd been examining. “I—oh, hello, Miss Cheerilee. I wasn't expecting—“
“I was looking for a scented candle.” Cheerilee motioned to the shelves of candles. “Something to take the stress off when grading, you know.”
“Yes.” Miss Harshwhinny brushed her hands on her pantsuit, smoothing the few wrinkles in it. “I prefer listening to music, but to each her own, I always say.” She glanced over at the shelf. “I never really understood the appeal of candles.”
Cheerilee shrugged. “You really ought to try it sometime. There's something primal about watching a flame dance around, and of course happy scents bring happy memories.”
“I've always preferred a neutral home. But perhaps. . . .” She eyed the shelf of candles. “How do you even go about choosing?”
“I have a favorite scent for grading. They do let you open the candles and smell them, if you're trying to make up your mind what you like.” She walked over to the display and picked a blue sage and lavender candle, then lifted the lid so that Harshwhinny could smell it.
“A little too cloying for my own taste,” she said. “Although I suppose in moderation it would be nice to have a touch of floral in the house.”
Cheerilee glanced over at the racks of greeting cards. “I know it's none of my business. . . .”
Harshwhinny sighed. “I'm looking for a very particular card, and it seems that there isn't one available which quite fits the occasion.”
Cheerilee nodded. Every Hearth's Warming, she found herself facing the same dilemma. There never was a card that felt quite sincere enough for her parents, and then when she was shopping for friends, all the cards seemed to have too much subtext. She often found herself settling on something funny instead, because everyone liked a good laugh when they opened their Hearth's Warming cards.
“Why don't you tell me what the occasion is,” Cheerilee suggested, “and then we can both look together.”
“Do you really want to know?”
Cheerilee plastered a fake smile on her face, the smile she saved for when a bad student in her class suddenly, unexpectedly raised his hand and stated with absolute confidence that the capital of Prance was Bordeaux, and she had to be both encouraging but also correct the misunderstanding.
At least she wasn't a kindergarten teacher. Every year, without fail, some boy would bring in a frog or a snake and reveal it with the same pride as if he'd just painted the Mona Lisa. Nine times out of ten, it escaped before the end of show-and-tell.
The tenth time, it had vanished before the reveal.
“Well.” Miss Harshwhinny crossed her arms. “A couple of years ago, I was dating a man—um . . . well, his name isn't important. We'd been dating for five years. Met at a Friendship Games tournament, in fact. At the time, he was a coach for Crystal Prep, and we kind of hit it off. There was a while where our schools kept competing, you know.”
Cheerilee nodded.
“And things were starting to get serious between us. I'd spend the night at his apartment a couple of nights a week, you know.” A faint blush began to creep across her cheeks, before being overshadowed by a scowl. “So I thought. . . .”
“You thought it was gonna happen. You thought he was going to pop the question.”
“I'd already started looking through Modern Bride, getting an idea of what I might like for a wedding dress. Dropped a couple of hints, and he seemed like he was thinking the same thing.” A faint smile touched her lips, although it was overshadowed by the distant, empty look in her eyes.
“One morning at work, he sent me a text message. Said he'd cheated on me with one of my friends.
“I forgave him. He sounded like he was sorry.” Miss Harshwhinny brushed her hands down her jacket and squared her shoulders. “And I thought that maybe we could move past that, and for a week, I thought . . . but I was just fooling myself. A week later, he broke up with me. On MyStable.
“And then, he had the gall to ask if we could still be friends.”
“No.”
“When I didn't answer that message, he sent me a sad face text message, and a link to Smile, Smile, Smile.” She brushed an imaginary spot of dust off her pantleg.
“Against my better judgment, I didn't unfriend him then and there. Social media will ruin us.” A bitter smile crossed her face. “I would have been better off not knowing what he's been doing these last four years. But for better or worse, I do.
“The two lovebirds went and moved to my old hometown, and then he spent the next year on MyStable complaining about how shitty it was. How it was boring, how there was nothing to do there, how all the people who lived there were ignorant hicks.”
Miss Cheerilee wasn't stupid. She'd already put the rest of the pieces together, but it wasn't her place to interrupt.
“Long story short, time heals all wounds, as they say. I eventually stopped paying any attention to them on MyStable, even though I'd occasionally see something on my newsfeed from one of them, I sort of tuned it out. But they also say a bad bit keeps on turning up, and lo and behold, this weekend my newsfeed was positively flooded with pictures from their wedding.
“One part of me wants to let bygones be bygones, and wish them the best of luck.” She leaned back against the rack of greeting cards. “Because that's what adults do. We had a good five years together, after all.”
“But you're not completely ready to forgive and forget.”
“Hell, no.” Harshwhinny turned back to the rack of cards. “Want to help me find a card that says 'Good Luck, and Fuck You?'”
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Well, that was hilarious.
7618255
--Spade
Edit:
Whoops, thought this was the radio "beeped" edit.It's not.
/shrug
If no one has made a greeting card to the convey the message: 'Good luck and fuck you' then someone is missing out on massive profit.
Ain't that conflicting feelings?
Just send an e-card saying 'Congratulations' with a link:
[youtube=AibtyCAhyQE]
Edit: Don't know what I did wrong, but that's 'Die In a Fire'...
This is wonderful
I so need one of those to send to my ex... I can so sympathize with Harshwhinny here. At least it was too my face, and not through Facebook. Oh, and I didn't forgive her. But yeah, kinda similar all the same
Here, have a fave and a like!
I'm pretty sure that's what blank cards are for. That way, it's sure to deliver the perfect message.
I quite enjoyed this; I'm a sucker for uncommon character interactions.
lol Hilarious.^^
And I bet they find just such a card.
I know people who've been in this exact situation.
How about this for a card: on the front is a well-dressed person, standing straight and smiling. Written beneath the picture is "I'm happy for you." Inside, is a back-shot of the person, where it reveals they are holding a weapon (such as a baseball bat or axe). Written under that is "But I still want to bash your head in."
7618316
One thing I considered for the occasion was to buy a whole bunch of gift cards, and put exactly one cent of value on each. But I'm not quite that much of a jerk.
7618327
It is.
7618351
This guy I used to work with, we messed with each other all the time. I came in one morning, and he'd put a big board against my tool box that said, in spray paint, "Your box is ugly and you will die."
The next day, I played this song for him:
7618392
Since Facebook never forgets, I probably could have put exact conversations in the story. Probably best that I didn't.
7618395
Or a really nice gift bag full of horse s
t.
Thanks! Harshwhinny needs more serious stories.
I really need to write more EqG stories, to be honest.
7618421
Thanks!
7618482
If they don't, that's an untapped market right there.
7618514
Me, too.
But hey, some good came out of it. Now I'm writing ponyfic.
7618647
Ooh, I like that. I think even without text, the meaning of that would be clear.
Maybe the guy on the card could be holding flowers in one hand (that you can see on the front), and an axe in his other, behind his back.
7618351 After it's pasted into your comment, you have to delete the "https://youtu.be/" part.
7618825 Thanks.
They really don't have a good card for an "I fucking hate you but I'm an adult so good luck" kind of moment. Guess you'd just have to make your own.
Nice story with a funny ending nice job
cdn.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/MjAxMi01NzczMTVlOGE3ODc4ZTI1.png
data.whicdn.com/images/45531472/large.jpg
cdn.someecards.com/someecards/usercards/1344397085284_8472257.png
65.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l26a2cXxcW1qbd3rdo1_1280.jpg
Never ever try to remain friends with an ex. The pain is never worth it. A clean break, no further contact.
Relevant video (caution, naughty words):
This was an interesting interaction.
Don't see these two all that often.
So was she dating him for six years or five? Or was that last year not one of the good ones so it doesn't count there at the end.
If you break up with someone then you should make it clean.
I know that feeling...even after 20 years I'd still like to send a card like that to a certain someone!
Nice work on pairing these two characters. Very good story!
actually i someone made this kind of cards, they would make a lot of money.
A good tribute to the Harsh
7619231
Nice!
7619362
It's really a niche that ought to be filled. I do like 7618647's suggestion. That's a card which ought to exist.
7619392
7619468
Or at least not until the wounds have had time to heal. Staying friends won't work, but re-establishing contact after a period of years can work out.
7619512
It's a shame, really, because they make a great pair.
Five. That got missed in pre-reading, and is now corrected.
7619585
Agreed.
7619770
Yeah . . . some wounds never quite heal, do they?
Thank you!
7619777
I know. I can think of some people I'd like to send them to.
7619868
Thanks!
7621478
Thank you!
7622769 Wow. You respond to comments. I don't think I've seen anyone else with over 1000 followers reply to people before. You're the first that I've known to do that.
None of the people I follow have over 1000 followers. I usually follow due to personality and good stories. And by personality, I mean they actually respond to people.
Also, I assume you like those 4 things that I found by googling something and sorting through about 50-100 images to find the best images to fit the ending.
This was great. I kinda wanna see more adventures of Harshwhinny and Cheerilee.
7622922
ocalhoun, Georg, Estee, and Cynewulf all seem to be pretty good at responding to comments, too, and I think all of them have over a thousand followers.
I really like the comments--in fact, that's what drew me to Fimfiction in the first place. You could have an actual dialogue with your readers, and where else could you do that?
I did, and the second one was my favorite, because I can totally see Miss Harshwhinny on that card. If I had any artistic skill whatsoever, I'd make that card, using the coverart from this story.
7623798
Me, too. When I was writing this, I realized how uncommon a pairing that was [if you search those two tags, this is the only result], and it really shouldn't be.
...capital of Prance was Bordeaux...
...capital of Prance...
...Prance...
It's not our world and makes me wonder what kind of problems they have there. Most likely it's the better version of our world or some nonsense like that.
...for some reason, my first thought was her listening to heavy metal rather than classical music or something.
7633632
The thing that's constantly bugged me about "Prance" is that I'm still not clear what the adjective form is- "Prench"??
8473905
Who's to say she doesn't?
Yeah, you speak Prench when you're in Prance.
Or 'fancy,' as Applejack calls it.
vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/mylittlebrony/images/1/1a/Applejack_vector_by_hombre0-d4a3lwt.png
8479953
Nothing says she doesn't, it just isn't the first thing you'd expect.
Well, maybe. I think that "(nice|stuffy) old lady likes death metal" is a trope.
8482112
And then there's the nice old lady that plays death metal.
Well, sorta. But close enough, I'd say.
Some delicious cynical goodness packed into this one.
9309014
Life experiences, man.
9392065
That'll do it. This was a fine character piece for Miss Harshwhinny though.
9392862
I think she was the perfect character for this. She’s got the right attitude.
9393168
Right attitude indeed!
9394445
And let’s be honest, there aren’t enough EqG fics with Harshwhinney. Also, as obvious a pairing as it seems, I think I’ve got the only one that’s got Harshwhinney and Miss Cheerilee.