Chapter 3
Twilight woke up, slightly woozy, “Ugh, what happened?”
She rubbed her head and closed her eyes, trying to recall what had happened, “We were in a hall in the castle, then Celestia told us to do something, and then…”
Twilight just remembered the final events that occurred before she was fell unconscious. She jolted up and looked around in a panic.
“Princess Celestia? Girls? Anyone?” she shouted.
No response. Twilight instead found floating islands, trees, and other debris littering the psychedelic void she was in.
“What is this place?”
Although Twilight did not recognize this place, for some reason she felt… pleasant? As if the total chaos engulfing the place made her feel happy.
She got up and walked around. However she didn’t go far as she was tackled down on to the ground by something.
“Oh it’s so good to have you back again! Finally after a thousand years!” it exclaimed while hugging her.
Twilight managed to turn around and get a good look of her attacker. But when she did, she backed away as fast she could as her assailant was Discord, who looked very happy.
He stood up and walked closer to her, “So tell me, how didja break out? What sort of things did Sunbutt make you do? Did she try to plague your mind with friendship lessons? You didn't follow them though right? Oh if that b-“
Discord was interrupted as Twilight snarled, “You.”
“Yes it’s me, why? Is there something wrong?” Discord responded.
“Yeah there’s something wrong! You took the Elements of Harmony! You’re trying to take over Equestria! You’re evil,”
“Well I wouldn’t say that I’m evil but yes I did take the Elements of Harmony so I wouldn’t end up being a rock again, so?”
“Where did you put them?!” Twilight demanded to know.
Discord looked at her confused but then chuckled, “Haha very funny Twilight, but you can drop the act now.”
Twilight just looked at him angrily.
“Come on, now you can stop. Nobody is here except us,” Discord insisted.
She continued to glare at him.
“Okay seriously charade’s over, you can stop. You’re making Papa feel sad.”
“Listen, I don’t know what you’re talking about but if you won’t tell me where the Elements are, I’m going to leave and find them myself,” Twilight stated as she got up, "Once I find out how to get out of, here."
Discord looked at her again with the same face of confusion as before.
“Wait, it can’t be… Did they actually?” Discord muttered.
Twilight began walking away from the draconequus until she reached the ledge of the island she was on. She gasped as she nearly fell off and backed away little. She surveyed her surroundings and planned her next course of action.
“Well, I don’t see any other option but to teleport so…”
Twilight put on a face of immense concentration and within a few moments she teleported to her destination, another floating island.
Discord saw her and was confused by the amount of effort she put in to her teleport.
Twilight continued to walk on the new island she was on, but was gasped as Discord flashed right next to her.
“Gah! I told you to --,”
“What was that teleport?” Discord questioned.
“What do you mean?” Twilight responded.
“That teleport you did a few seconds ago. Why’d it take so long for you to do it? And why did you look like you were constipated when you were trying to do it?”
“Well teleportation is a spell that requires quite a bit of energy and concentration to accomplish and while a skilled unicorn may be able to do it a little easier, I am not a unicorn and the only reason I can do it is because of Celestia’s teachings,” she explained.
Discord blinked rapidly a few times, “So old Sunbutt taught you how to use your magic?”
“Yes and also, stop calling her that.”
“Do you know what you are?” The villain questioned further.
Twilight stammered “Uh… I- I- No. From what I’ve been told I’m the result of magic done wrong,”
Discord stroked his goatee. He thought about how to approach this.
“Well guess what kiddo? Today’s your lucky day! Or unlucky day, depending on how you see it cus' you've been lied to for a small portion of your life!” Discord announced, speaking into a microphone he pulled out of nowhere,
"Wait what do you mean lied to?" Twilight asked
“We can get to that later, what's important is that they're wrong and I have the truth. So let's get to it! First off, what are you? Well you’re not a pony!”
“I think I got that one figured out already Discord,” Twilight replied sarcastically.
“You’re something far more powerful and ancient. A species that has existed since the dawn of time,” smoke surrounded Twilight as Discord, with his body extended out, circled her in the air menacingly, “The only species with the power to bend reality. You are a draconequus! Just like me”
"A what?"
"A dra-con-e-quus, spelt d-r-a-c-o-n-e-q-u-u-s."
"I don't believe you," Twilight stated.
"Why not?" he asked.
"Because it's impossible! Nothing can just bend reality!"
"Really? After all the stuff you've seen me do within two minutes of first seeing me and you don't believe me?" he said, slightly irritated.
"But all you did was move around in a some windows! Any unicorn with an illusion spell can do that."
"Well fine then, you can keep doubting me but don't blame me when your mind shuts down from not being able to handle my reality bending in one second."
The draconequus snapped his fingers and the world around them cracked. It wasn't that the floating rocks, islands were and other debris fractured but it was more like a glass mirror surrounding the two beasts cracked.
"What the," Twilight exclaimed.
"Ta-dah!"
With another snap of his fingers the cracks disappeared.
"What was that?! Everything was split and it was- it was like looking at a cracked mirror but I'm also in the mirror and- and-"
"You'll figure it out in due time but to put it simply, I broke this reality just a little," he explained with a grin on his face.
"No way," She stood flabbergasted, "then what you said was true?"
"Yup," the Lord of Chaos said, "Now that you believe me, don't try and do what I did just now. I don't need you creating an inescapable wormhole into limbo."
Twilight looked at herself in revelation. She finally had one of the biggest questions haunting her life answered. Yet she didn't feel satisfied. Her parents, Celestia... they really lied to her. Well perhaps her parents didn't know. That would be likely. But Celestia knew. Her mentor, practically her second mother. Yet she didn't tell her. The gears in her mind started spinning as she continued to fill in the blanks of her past.
"Wait a minute... Does that mean there are others like you and me?"
“Fortunately for the inhabitants of Equestria, no," Discord said mischievously, “If that were the case the world would have been long gone. Probably by implosion, or maybe eaten by giant mice after turning the planet to cheese.”
The purple draconequus struggled to form that image in her mind but she stopped when another realization came to her, “Hold on. Then where did I come from? If there aren’t any other draconequuses? Draconequi? Hey what’s the plural for draconequus?”
“I think its draconequi.”
“Oh okay. Anyway, if there aren’t any other draconequi, how was I born? Unless... No."
"Looks like you finally figured it out," he said as he calmly floated back down on his mismatched legs.
Twilight however wasn't so calm. She didn't really know how to feel. Her brain once again raced with questions such as 'Who's side am I on now? Are my friends going to leave me after they find out? Am I still the bearer of the Element of Magic? Will I have to abandon harmony?'. All of it coming from this revelation. Her head started to hurt as she tried to deny it.
Discord, smiling, stood in front of her with his arms wide open, “Now come here and give papa a hug.”
Instead the purple draconequus, with her talons covering her face, hunched over. Discord moved closer to inspect her and saw that her eyes were glowing.
“Uh oh.”
Suddenly parts of the island began shifting sporadically. Random objects appeared and disappeared. The now separated parts of the island turned into cheese, chocolate, metal, and all sorts of other materials. Discord readied to teleport out of the island but was instead knocked high into the air by a stone pillar.
He made a quick recovery however and with finesse he dodged another pillar hurtled into the sky
“Woah! Is that all you can do? I mean, taking the island apart and transmuting it? Booooring! Bleh, you did so much more when you were a baby! Sunbutt must have really screwed with your head...” he said while dodging more pillars.
Discord sighed, “Well, sorry sweetie but I’m going to have to put you out again.”
He snapped his fingers and anticlimactically Twilight fell to the ground face first. The altered chunks of island mostly stayed afloat in the swirling abyss, as Discord delicately floated down to the ground in front of the unconscious purple draconequus.
He bent over and gazed at her. A sigh left his mouth, “Hopefully next time I won’t have to knock you out…”
Everything happened a little too fast for most of the ponies in the grand room. Fluttershy continued to hide behind Applejack, who was trying to piece together what happened along with Rarity and Rainbow Dash, while Pinkie Pie… felt a mix of amazement and sadness from the kidnapping of her friend.
The hall was soon filled with the sound of hasty clops as the towering white mare paced around in circles. Her brow was sweating and her eyes concentrated, with millennia of experience she was quick to move and start coming up with a plan.
“If you don’t mind me askin your highness but, what the hay just happened?” Applejack questioned.
“Oh that’s easy!” Pinkie chimed in, “So Discord stole the elements with his super crazy magic and then he showed up and kidnapped Twilight and left this little note on the floor!”
Celestia quickly picked up the note with her magic and read it.
“What’s it say Princess?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“’To retrieve your missing Elements, just make sense of this change of events. Twists and turns are my master plan. Then find the Elements back where you began.’”
“Oh this is gonna be fun! It’s like a scavenger hunt!” Pinkie exclaimed.
“Except if we don’t win the world will become a circus show,” the blue Pegasus sarcastically added, “So, where do we start?”
“Um…” a small voice peeped out, “Maybe we should start in the castle’s garden maze? Since it says ‘twists and turns’. I mean I could be wrong but you know…”
“Y’know what? You might be right Fluttershy,” Applejack responded.
“Come on then let’s get a move on!” Rainbow Dash shouted.
Celestia marvelled at the co-operation between the five ponies and felt relieved to know that she chose wisely.
“You comin’ with us Princess?” the brash Pegasus asked, “We could probably use some magic firepower.”
The alicorn was a little astonished as she wasn’t used to ponies asking for help directly but she dutifully accepted, “Very well. I shall come along and assist in any way I can.”
Discord had already changed most of Equestria. One look through a window confirmed that. It was dangerous, and while the five bearers may be able to fight, Celestia worried about them being overwhelmed. Worse, Discord appearing to interrupt or toy with them remained a serious possibility.
The group of heroes arrived at the entrance of the castle garden, ready for any zany obstacle that would be hurtled at them. Fortunately the garden was left mostly untouched, although the hedge maze appeared to look vastly larger than it did from inside the castle.
Celestia looked towards the left, where the pedestal that used to carry Discord’s stone body was. She still hadn’t quite figured out how he escaped but she had a couple of theories. It reminded her of when Twilight broke free of her stasis and caused a panic.
They arrived at the entrance of the expansive maze and everypony excluding the alicorn gasped.
“W-We have to go in there?” the yellow pegasus quivered.
“Nope! Dopey Discord forgot about these babies!” Rainbow Dash said already heading towards the sky, “I'll just do a quick flyover and we'll have the Elements in no time.”
A flash on the sides of her body stopped her flight as she fell straight to the ground.
“My wings!” she screamed.
More screams were heard from Rarity and Fluttershy while a gasp was elicited from Celestia as their racial body parts disappeared.
Under the arch at the entrance of the maze, a ball of light appeared which Discord popped out from, standing at full height, laughing maniacally.
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Awww...
But hey, nice chapter! Take all the time you need?
Fanfiction is a hobby, after all
Just found this story and i have to say it is an interesting idea. You have a like good sir/madam
Keep up the good work
i need more of this in my life so please make it so
You might need a proofreader for the typos, the punctuation and the wording.
I don't imagine that Discord is going to be very happy about Twilight forgetting and her... boring-ness.
And Twilight seems very upset, herself. There aren't even words to describe how badly Celestia dropped the ball on this one.
Would her little breakdown accelerate her gaining an understanding of how to use her draconequus powers? Is Twilight actually an obsessed OCPD neurotic, or is that just a result of trying to make her less chaotic? Can draconequus magic even be used by an orderly mind?
why me think twilight is more on the harmony side of things, then chaos side of things
also yea for update
8318816
i think she is more of the order type then chaos type...... but the element would not choose her if she was chaos base,
Discord could mess with time and have Twilight mess with her friends while he messes with "Sunbutt."
8319433
Not necessarily. The way I see it, the Elements of Harmony were powered by friendship, and friendship alone. I don't think it would be too much of a stretch if even Discord himself could use some of them as long as he held true friendship in his heart.
The only question would be which Element(s) he would have. Laughter seems obvious, but maybe Magic...?
8320297
I think he more of laughter or maybe honest, cause he never really lie to anyone he just leave thing open end for other to fill in the blank or to figure out.
Give us more enviroment desriptions and maybe develop the dialogue a bit more. We can ask for it considering how long we wait between chapters.
8322551
Got it.
8321019
:we don't have superstrenght as a racial trait.
8323492
That's actually the only bigger weakness of the story.
8319433
Not necessarily. When you take the time to think about it, Harmony isn't really opposed to Chaos, anymore than it is opposed to Order. It's the extremes of each that are antithetical to it; at the far end of Chaos is only destruction and disharmony, while the depths of Order hold only uniformity rather than unity.
Well.. rather than calling those the extremes, I should call them the purest states. Even Discord is a diluted and tainted expression of absolute Chaos.
And I don't know if Twilight even can be a being of order. I don't think we've been told how much draconequi as a species are connected to chaos.
8327452
Well we did have the story line in the comics where Discord becomes a being of order.
8328347
Comics rank lower in canon than the show does. I personally think that each comic or arc should be individually decided upon as headcanon. If you don't, you wind up with stuff like Fiendship is Magic #3 actually happening, which I will steadfastly refuse to acknowledge even in the face of death.
8328347
The way I see it, harmony means balance, not order, I think the only reason Discord is connected to disharmony at times is simply because he want's everything to be in chaos when he first appears, as such he wants to unbalance things and cause disharmony, to the point it effects the minds of others.
Turning him into a fully order based being is basically still being an advent of disharmony in my mind as that would likely mean he wouldn't allow any chaos anymore and would try to effect others in that manner.
But like light and dark, evil and good, there also needs to exist chaos and order in the mind, just one over the other is no good if you ask me, this may however just be me though.
As such I think you shouldn't just change him, but its your choice if you really want to, I also think it would be fine to change Twilight with wanting a bit of chaos, as long as a balance remains in herself to prevent her from going haywire with it, at least if she's to keep her element of harmony, if not then it's fine if she does.
This is just my thought though and I only felt the need to say it after seeing some posts here.
Either way, I love the story as it is and will gladly keep reading it when you continue it.
8372601
Agree with most of that... but not the "evil and good needing balance" part. Any balance has a goal it's trying to optimize after all, and "most good" IS that goal when talking about Balance rather than balance.
8379014
While the balance between good and evil is a bit more lopsided to one side, it still needs the other to balance it out, otherwise neither of them would exist.
That said, as I stated with my other post, these are just my own thoughts on the matter and I won't tell you to simply up and trust my word for it, form your own thoughts however you feel fit and go with it, these are our own thoughts and feelings afterall.
Okay, the concept is good, but your writing needs a bit of practice. Firstly, most of the lines that aren't taken straight from show feel like the characters are only saying what the plot needs to move on. Secondly, the story seriously needs more describtive text and just text in general. Remember that this isn't a movie; we only know what you write, so if you don't write about the characters' reactions and expressions, it's just gonna seem like they stare blankly at each other while talking. Finally, try to stop spelling out what every character thinks in every situation. If you tell us exactly how a character feels about every situation, it's gonna remove the impact of any twists you throw at us down the road.
I think that's about it. Keep up the good work.
One offhand issue I have is a lack of focus on the grand scheme. As stated earlier, Twilight had never performed the transformation spell until recently, and the time skip leaves a lot of holes to be filled. Chiefly, if she was still the Element of Magic, then why not did the corrupted Nightmare Moon express shock and surprise at her appearance and/or reveal Twilights true nature to spite Celestia in the name of her hatred during the corruption? Timeskips such as the ones you've illustrated need to be filled in because of the gaps left, and besides the one flashback I've not seen details to supplement the various issues presented. Besides this, my main concern with the story has been the general lack of description and overall care for worldbuilding. Insofar from what I've seen, the structure has been simple A does B which results in C without explanation or depth to the betterment of the story. Overall, I hope this can be further fleshed out in the future, as the premise is interesting, but the execution has been little more than blasé at best. However, I am still intrigued to see where this goes, so I do truly hope for all the best in the future of the story continues.
oh I hope the story isnt belly up
It be interesting if twilight was the spirit of order since discord is chaos
Is this going to come off hiatus anytime soon?
Hope to this continued soon!
#update please
1:42-1:48
This is honestly the sort of story I wanted to read, need more Twilight Draconequus
Good story, would like to know if or when it gets finished though.