381 - Survivor Guilt
In over a thousand years of life, Princess Celestia had accumulated more than a few regrets.
Never finding out what had happened to Star-Swirl, the great unicorn wizard who had tutored her and her sister when they’d been fillies, was a notable one. So was their failure to stop King Sombra from dragging the Crystal Empire along with him when he’d been sealed away. But for a millennium, her single greatest regret had been Luna’s transformation into Nightmare Moon.
As much as she knew that Luna had made her own choices, Celestia couldn’t help but feel guilty over what had happened. The realization of how blind she’d been to Luna’s suffering, of how she’d felt so unappreciated for so long, was her failure as both a sister and a princess. The culmination of which had been the day she’d been forced to banish her sister to the moon, which had for so long been the single worst day of her life.
Until now.
Now, watching her sister lying there, battered and bruised and…despoiled, Celestia knew that she’d failed Luna again, worse than before. The knowledge that she hadn’t been able to protect her sister from that monster that called itself Lex Legis was bad enough, but the fact that Luna was the only one to be stripped of her alicornhood like this was somehow infinitely worse. That she had gotten off so lightly compared to what had been done to her little sister left Celestia feeling sickened and somehow ashamed, and she knew that the memory of it would stay with her for the rest of her life.
But she also knew that she couldn’t dwell on that now. She had to be strong, for Luna’s sake. It was with that thought in mind that she forced herself to smile, gently reaching out to lay one hoof over Luna’s. “Sister,” she called softly. “I’m right here. I promise you, I swear to you that everything’s going to be alright.”
Luna didn’t say anything, simply continuing to stare upward blankly, still wearing the same stricken look on her face that she’d had for the last several minutes.
Just like Celestia, Luna had woken up in a blind panic. But although Celestia had done her best to soothe her sister, there’d been no way to lessen the shock of what had happened to her. Even through the considerable amount of pain that her injuries had left her in, Luna had realized immediately that something had happened to her. At first she’d thought that she simply couldn’t feel her wings, before realizing the awful truth. A glance at her tail – now a lackluster blue that hung limp and still – confirmed her transformation, causing Luna to lay back and stare upward, quite clearly in shock.
She had stayed like that as House Call, his voice quivering, had quietly read off the extent of her injuries. By far the worst was her horn, which had sustained massive damage from her attempt to force magic through it after it had already suffered a considerable burn. Although House Call had said that the extensive nature of the wound couldn’t be fully measured without going to a hospital, the phrase “permanent injury” had hung in the air, unspoken but impossible to miss…as was the implication that she might never cast spells again, as though the loss of her wings hadn’t been enough. After that, hearing about the massive electrical burns she’s suffered across her lower body and the internal damage she’d sustained – which also couldn’t be properly measured without special medical equipment that wasn’t on hoof, but were phrased in such a way as to try and avoid saying that they looked bad enough that a full recovery might be impossible – almost made a horrible sort of sense. It was like Lex hadn’t been content to just take Luna’s wings from her, wanting to make sure that she’d lost what made unicorns and earth ponies special also.
But Celestia had choked that down as well, instead politely thanking House Call for his report and asking if he and his team could give her and Luna a moment alone. Unsurprisingly, they’d been more than happy to do so, practically fleeing the room. Now it was just the two of them, and Celestia was desperate to try and let Luna know that all wasn’t lost.
“Everything will be alright,” repeated Celestia, her first entreaty having gotten no reaction from her sister. “Cadance will be able to undo everything that Lex has done to you. You’ve seen her ability to heal injuries, and I know that she’ll be able to undo this…” She faltered, unable to bring herself to even attempt to verbalize what Lex had done to her. But she rallied a moment later. “She’ll be able to undo this. And I’ve called Twilight back from that other world. She’ll be back in Equestria tomorrow morning; I’ve already told her to go to Canterlot Castle and meet us there.” She didn’t mention how she hadn’t found Pinkie Pie, which meant that even if they removed the Elements from the Tree of Harmony they wouldn’t be able to use them. The last thing Luna needed right now was more bad news.
“The guards were hurt,” she continued, trying not to be discouraged by how Luna was still refusing to react to what she was saying, “but the pegasi contingent are already making preparations for us to leave.” Fortunately, they’d brought the chariots with them when River had invited them all to stay in her mansion. “We should be able to leave toni-, in a few hours.” Silently berating herself for the slip, Celestia swallowed nervously, but Luna still showed no sign that she’d heard a word she was saying. It was somehow even worse than if she’d gotten mad at her for almost saying something so insensitive. “We’ll have them fly us back to Tall Tale, and take the train back to Canterlot. Cadance and Shining Armor are still there, standing by to receive us as soon as we arrive.”
Still nothing. It was enough to send a cold stab of fear through Celestia’s stomach, and she held Luna’s hoof tighter, squeezing it gently between two of her own. “Luna, please…please, talk to me.”
For a moment Luna still didn’t react. But just as Celestia was beginning to wonder if she should call the doctors back Luna drew in a shuddering breath. Her eyes stayed glued to the ceiling, but now they filled with tears which spilled down her cheeks a moment later. Slowly, her expression crumpled, and when she finally looked over at Celestia she had a tortured look on her face. Then, her lips parted and she said the worst thing that she possibly could have.
“I’m sorry.”
The words hit Celestia like a punch in the gut, very nearly causing her to double over. “No!” Feeling her own eyes growing wet, Celestia fought to stay in control of herself. “Luna, no. You have nothing to be sorry for. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
But Luna shook her head miserably. “I couldn’t beat him,” she moaned. “I thought that if I gave it everything I had, I could be like Twilight. Like you. But I couldn’t.” A sob escaped her throat then. “I let you down. I let Silhouette down. I let everypony down.”
That was all Celestia could take, and she leaned forward and wrapped Luna in the tightest hug that she could without aggravating her injuries, her own tears overflowing now. “No!” She could barely get the words out, fighting down the urge to weep alongside her sister. “Some of the guards were still conscious, and they told me what happened. You fought bravely. You stood up to that monster even when you knew you were outmatched, and you never gave up.” Breaking their embrace, Celestia cupped Luna’s cheeks in her hooves, looking at her from a few inches away. “I’m proud of you, sister. More proud than I’ve ever been.”
“Celestia…” That was all Luna could take, and she buried her face in her sister’s chest, crying her eyes out. This time Celestia joined her, resting her chin on Luna’s head as she cried with her.
Several minutes passed before they finally ran out of tears, sniffling as they separated. Wiping her eyes, Celestia managed to give her sister a wan smile. “Do you feel any better?”
Luna tried to copy the expression, but it was clear her heart wasn’t in it. “Not really, no…”
The corners of her lips fell as Celestia nodded, and she pursed her lips for a moment before giving Luna an earnest look. “Cadance will be able to fix everything,” she said again.
“…what if she can’t?” Luna’s voice was barely above a whisper, looking upwards again…as though she couldn’t bear to look at herself, Celestia realized.
The insight made her chest ache. “She will,” she insisted. “She has a goddess on her side.”
She wished she could have taken the words back the instant they left her mouth, but it was already too late. “So does Lex,” murmured Luna, before forcing herself to look down at her wingless body. “Not like Silhouette.”
Licking her lips, Celestia tried again. “Cadance will be able to fix everything,” she repeated. “She’ll bring Silhouette back. She’ll heal your injuries. And she’ll undo what Lex did to you. And if she can’t, then Twilight will. She’s been studying that world’s magic, and it’s more powerful than ours. And if for some reason she can’t, then we’ll ask Mihr if he can help us.” She wasn’t sure the angel would be able to, though. He’d alluded to being able to aid them only under certain circumstances. But it was a possibility that Celestia refused to dismiss; even if helping them hunt down a weapon of evil was out of bounds, helping someone who was hurt had to be acceptable. More importantly, it was another source of hope, something she knew both of them needed right now. “You’ve got a lot of powerful friends who are going to do everything they can to help you, sister. Don’t forget that.”
Luna let out a shaky breath, and Celestia could see another round of worries and anxieties on the tip of her tongue. But somehow, Luna managed to keep from speaking them aloud, instead swallowing and taking several deep breaths. “Alright,” she said at last. “Then what do we do?”
Celestia hadn’t been lying about how proud she felt of her sister, and that pride shot through her again now at how brave Luna was being. It warmed her from the inside, filling her with the resolve to see this through. “Then we gather all of our friends together, and we make a plan. And once we have, we come back here to Vanhoover, and we stop Lex Legis once and for all.”
She was going to say more, but the door suddenly rattled, as though something had impacted it. The sound caused both sisters to look over at it, but the sound wasn’t followed by a proper knock, nor a voice, nor somepony opening the door. Celestia spared a moment to glance at Luna, noting the grave look on her sister’s face, before turning back to the door, her horn glowing as she wrapped the door in her telekinesis. A moment later she flung it open…to reveal nothing.
It was probably one of the maids eavesdropping. Or maybe one of the doctors listening in to see if we needed any help. But after everything that had happened that morning, Celestia was in no mood to take chances, pausing just long enough to give her sister a warning glance before she got up and painfully crept toward the open door. Her condition made it take a few seconds longer than it should have, and she winced as she finally reached the entrance to the hallway. A glance to the left revealed nothing, and to the right-
The tip of pony’s tail disappeared around the corner of an intersection.
For a moment Celestia just stared at where the unknown pony had vanished. She couldn’t go after them, not in her current state. Moreover, the intersection hadn’t been near a window, so there hadn’t been enough light to make out even the color of the retreating pony’s tail. Whoever they were, they were gone now…and a second later Celestia realized the full scope of what that likely meant, her blood running cold.
Somepony had been listening to them, somepony who had stumbled when she’d said that they’d come back to finish Lex Legis off, as if upset by that. And now they were gone…almost certainly to tell Lex what they’d overheard. And while Celestia had no idea why the monstrous unicorn was having them treated for their injuries instead of doing something far worse to them, she doubted that would remain the case if and when that unknown pony told him that she and Luna were already plotting his downfall. Which meant that waiting even a few more hours to head back to Tall Tale was no longer an option.
They had to leave Vanhoover immediately.
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Hey everypony! I'm going on my annual vacation later this week (no, it's not to BronyCon), so there won't be any updates this coming Thursday or Sunday. The next chapter will be posted Wednesday, August 7th.
I hope you'll look forward to it!
9757062
Enjoy your vacation!
9757062
Not to BronyCon? That is a shame.
I'm hoping Lex will finally get his meeting. Events have constantly seemed to conspire against it.
Betting that it was one of the Knights who just discovered their next big 'mission' and scampering off to tell Sonata since she's so close or Feather Duster since she's thrown in her lot with Lex. A show of loyalty would go a long way in securing her daughter's safety.
Though it doesn't matter who it was given how panicked the princesses are at this point and they're likely to just rush out and flee Vanhoover post-haste to Tall Tale where their return train is likely waiting.
Now that I think about it, their plan to leave Vanhoover reminds me of Aisle and Cozy's own departure, namely their shared paranoia and fear of facing Lex's wrath. Though unlike Aisle and Cozy, who are essentially inconsequential to Lex, the princesses, even in their diminished state pose a legitimate threat to Lex and the formation of his kingdom.
Still, Lex could perceive the princesses fleeing Vanhoover as abandoning the refugees to save themselves, a selfish action in his eyes. It would be punishable too but considering what he already did to Luna, that might already be enough of one. Though plotting his downfall afterward is just asking to be cursed which, to be honest, is a legitimately good reason to run away as soon as possible.
Also, have fun on your vacation~ Kick back relax and enjoy yourself.
All Lex has to do is publically state is he wishes to meet the Princesses, on his terms, but will wait for them to come to him, then it will be up to Celestia to see if she wishes to play McCarthy Park?
Celestia all you need to do is go talk to LEX tell him that you were Wong and give him the power he needs to fix Vanhoover and the immediate area and i am betting he will help Luna. as to your injuries well suck it up you deserve them all. frankly i would have turned you in to a mud pony colt and left you like that for the rest of your short life.
9757075 Thanks!
9757139 Well, I've been a tabletop gamer far longer than I've been a brony.
9757150 At this point the necessary goodwill doesn't seem to be there any longer. Bringing all parties to the proverbial table will be much harder now, in all likelihood.
9757325 One of the Knights is the obvious choice for who just eavesdropped on the princesses, though we can't rule out Sonata or one of the mansion's staff. What they do with that information is anypony's guess, though if it makes its way back to Lex then you have to wonder what he'll do with it. At the very least, it confirms that the alicorns are now overtly hostile toward him, but that seems to be a foregone conclusion anyway at this point. Still, Celestia did let a few salient details slip, so it's difficult to say. The possibilities remain up in the air...unlike Luna.
As for the impact of the princesses fleeing Vanhoover, I suspect that'll be more symbolic than anything else. It's already fairly obvious that they were the losers of that fight, and leaving the city will put them beyond Lex's immediate reach (not that he can do much right now anyway). At this point, both sides need to fall back and lick their wounds in order to prepare for what comes next. The difference is that the alicorns have reinforcements to call upon, whereas Lex might have some allies...if the Knights ever get their spirit animals back, and if Fencer and company can make it back to Vanhoover. But even then, they seem like a poor match for the likes of Twilight Sparkle.
And thanks for the well-wishes! I quite appreciate them!
9757435 An interesting idea, though given how much the editor of the Canterlot Chronicle is a fan of the princesses (and how easy it would be to spin things as "the last time you met with them, you attacked them"), I wonder how well that would play out.
9757539 That's certainly something that could be tried, but somehow I don't see Celestia pursuing a policy of appeasement. While she certainly seems to be open to negotiation if she thinks that there's a partner for peace, she's (surprisingly) resolute in the face of hostility. There's no suggestion that she ever tried to talk Tirek, Discord, of King Sombra down when she originally faced all of them, after all. Only Luna warranted that level of consideration after she'd become Nightmare Moon, and that was quite clearly because she was her sister.
9758002
This excuse has not worked for me.
Poor Celestia, and poor Luna, that description of her is heart-wrenching. Long-term, there's few ways to constrain Celestia and Luna if they can get back to Canterlot. If Cadance can't fix Luna's curse, which may well be true, than Twilight is able to travel to the world of Everglow and with sufficient time could track down quite powerful spellcasters. Of course, finding and paying such a being would cost considerable time, effort and resources, but after the crazy shenanigans Celestia put in to redeem Luna from Night Mare Moon, I suspect she will spend years with this as her top priority and drain Canterlot's treasury if it's required. She will do almost anything not to have to face eternity without Luna by her side, even if it puts Equestria at risk.
Mihir will of course be useless. It's a little mean of me to say, but I do want to see Celestia contact him and ask for aid, just because the combination of empty platitudes and encouragement that solving the problem herself will teach her a valuable lesson will really make Celestia realize what it's like to be on the other side of that exchange.
Ugh, Silhouette is totally going to be remembered as a selfless, faultless martyr after this, isn't he?
9758002 See, that's the real way you keep an alicorn from getting their mojo back, remove it right before 2E releases at the big cons. If alicorns are a prestige class that will be banned when the new edition drops next month, and only current alicorns get to keep their power due to a grandfather clause...
9758505 It's a truism in d20 games that permanent injuries are never truly permanent. Rather, it's just a question of magic, which is really a question of money even when you have the necessary magic on hand. That's actually kind of a drama-killer, though, since it basically means that anything can be solved just by throwing money at it. Since other issues (i.e. traveling somewhere to find a spellcaster who can cast the necessary spells) are just as easily subverted (thanks a lot teleportation magic), there's a danger that entire swaths of narrative activities are rendered moot by how prevalent, safe, and easy most spellcasting is. Hence why a writer using the d20 rules has their work cut out for them in that regard. Of course, I suspect that right now Celestia would say that's a good thing, but what's good for the characters isn't always good for the plot.
I doubt Mihr would be so condescending as to say that Luna's suffering is a character-building exercise for her and Celestia, but there are various planar-political issues that might or might not come up. That's one of the problems with not really being versed in such things; it makes the results seem arbitrary and capricious, even when it comes from Lawful beings. Presumably the Upper Planes would want Luna healed though, right?
As for Silhouette, well, he can't be martyred if Cadance resurrects him!
9758512 Well, it's something of a moot point if you're not going to convert over.
So Aria gave Celestia the suggestion, Celestia took it from there, and now there's even more assumptions going on.
Granted, the are reasonable ones with what they are thinking, but still.
Damn you, Aria.
9764194 It's sort of like a snowball rolling down a mountain. Once things get started, they begin to cascade, and keep becoming more and more difficult to stop.