Lateral Movement

by Alzrius

463 - Malice at the Palace

Razzle Dazzle was going to be a tougher nut to crack than Pretty Penny had been.

Of course, River had known that before she’d arrived in Las Pegasus. Whereas Penny could easily be led around by the nose so long as she smelled an opportunity to build new hotels somewhere, Razzle wouldn’t be tempted by opportunities to expand her business outside of the city. Mostly because she knew there weren’t any.

Hotels were one thing. Every major city needed those; even Cloudsdale had a few. But not every city had a thriving entertainment industry the way Las Pegasus did. In fact, no other city had an entertainment industry the way Las Pegasus did. While most towns larger than a village would have a theater or two and maybe even a nightclub, they were all small-scale affairs, used mostly for local productions or to host the occasional celebrity visit. They weren’t attractions unto themselves, guaranteed to present an extravaganza every night the way the Las Pegasus did with the Palace of Prance and similar outlets.

Of course, there were exceptions to every rule, such as Manehattan’s Bridleway, but they were just that: exceptions. And River knew that there was no way she’d ever be able to convince Razzle to entertain the possibility to opening up a major entertainment venue in Vanhoover in the wake of the flooding, let alone make that a convincing enough pretext to lure her up there the way Lex wanted. Vanhoover’s reputation, among wider Equestria, was one of remoteness, temperatures that were mild at best, and maritime commercial activity. Nopony thought of it as the place to go for great entertainment.

“Which means I’ll have to change my approach,” River muttered as she took her dress off, carelessly tossing it to the other side of the carriage before doing the same to her jewelry. The perfume was taken care of by carefully dripping witch hazel extract onto a cotton ball and dabbing herself with it, letting it soak up the now-useless scent. While her previous ensemble had been perfect for a beachside hotel meeting, wearing it to the Palace would make her look like a bumpkin. Fortunately, River had already picked out a more suitable ensemble before she’d left her yacht, leaving it in her carriage so that she could change on the way.

For watching a show, dark colors were a must, since a bright outfit would look gaudy after the lights had all turned down. Fortunately, every mare who knew anything about fashion had a little black dress that she could slip into, and River was no exception. The pearl necklace and diamond earrings went perfectly with it, as did the vanilla perfume that she dabbed on afterward. Now the only choice was whether or not to wear a shawl…

She was still making up her mind when they arrived at the Palace twenty minutes later. Sighing, she eventually decided to use one, biting her lip as she picked out the deep blue from the among the three that she’d brought. It was traditional to use more colorful outerwear to contrast a black dress, but River wanted to avoid anything that could be construed as even remotely flashy or attention-grabbing. After all, she needed to keep up the pretext that she wasn’t here to see Razzle Dazzle, despite the opposite being true.

Stepping down from the carriage as one of her chauffeurs held the door, River glanced over at the stallion. “Be a dear and hold my purse for me, would you?” she asked, not bothering to wait for his answer as she headed toward the entrance. “Come along, now.”

There was a long line to get into the Palace, stretching out from the entrance – tickets were bought at the desk inside, rather than having some exterior kiosk like a common theater would have had – and around the block. Looking up at the marquee, it was easy to see why. Tonight’s show was featuring the Ponycat Dolls, one of the Palace’s more successful in-house groups. Which means that Razzle will probably be here, River hoped, knowing that the old mare liked to watch other ponies watching her dancing girls. But if she wasn't, River knew she’d need to keep attending these vapid performances until she got that nag’s attention. Hopefully it wouldn't come to that, since the trick she was about to pull probably wouldn't work if used too often…

“Good evening,” smiled River as she approached the desk inside, ignoring the outraged complaints from the couple she’d just cut in front of. “Would you happen to know if my balcony seat is ready? It should be under the name Bank.”

The stallion behind the desk didn’t blink at River’s casual disdain for the rules, instead flipping through a register. “Bank…Bank…I’m sorry, miss,” he replied a moment later. “I don’t have a Bank here.”

“Oh, of course, silly me,” laughed River easily. “I forgot I had a ticket purchased instead.” Gesturing to the chauffeur she’d dragooned into carrying her purse, she retrieved it from him when he stepped forward, digging around in it for a moment before withdrawing a several gems, placing them in front of the deskbound stallion. “There you go. That should confirm my reservation, don’t you agree?”

The stallion’s eyes moved back and forth between her and the gems. Just like with Pretty Penny, it was easy to tell what he was thinking. Despite working in such a prestigious establishment, he doubtlessly didn’t make very much; the money that she’d just put in front of him was enough that it would supplement his next paycheck nicely if he kept it. Now if there was just a balcony seat available…

“Balcony seat four, miss,” smiled the stallion, sliding her a program as he pulled the gems out of sight. “Enjoy the show.”

“I’m sure I will,” she smiled back. Smirking at the indignant looks from the couple behind her, River handed her purse to her chauffeur. “Put that back in the carriage, would you?” she murmured, though not before glancing inside to quickly count how much money she had left; if she checked it later and some was missing, she’d know who to blame.

With her preparations complete, River made her way upstairs. The Palace’s second story seats weren’t the crowded rows of chairs that made up the first floor. Rather, each balcony was a secluded alcove separate from the others, having four luxurious seats that were a cut above what the ground level offered. The edge of the balcony was a rim that jutted up rather than a railing, meaning that if you pulled your chair back a bit, you were effectively hidden from everypony on the first floor while still being able to see the stage, allowing for clandestine meetings to take place…or other activities.

The Ponycat Dolls had a rather risqué act, after all.

“Hopefully they clean these after each show,” muttered River to herself, peering at her seat before deciding it looked fine. She’d made her presence known with her shenanigans at the desk. Now all that was left to do was see if Razzle was in and willing to rise to the bait.

The lights dimmed a moment later, and music began to play as the curtain rose…

---

River stood up and stretched as the curtain came down for the first intermission.

The Ponycats had been in rare form tonight. They’d opened with “Belly Rubs,” before moving onto “Nine Lives for You,” “Ready to Pounce,” and “Like Catnip to Me.” But while River couldn’t have cared less for their singing – pop music all sounded alike to her – it was the dancing that had earned her appreciation. Even beyond the provocative costumes they’d worn, each of the mares on stage had flowed sensuously through their routines, trim bodies swaying and writhing to the beat of the music.

River had glanced down at the audience at one point, not surprised to find quite a few mares making up the crowd. While the stallions had all been eyeing the dancing girls with naked desire, most of the mares had been appreciating them for a different reason, one that River understood all too well. They wanted to be them. To have that perfect combination of youth, looks, and confidence that made the mares on stage seem like perfect archetypes of feminine allure. Of course, as attractive as that made them, River knew that it was all a carefully-constructed illusion; the entire thing was the product of exacting applications of makeup, ruthlessly-drilled choreography, harsh dieting, and a hundred other preparations all used in conjunction to make them seem like the ideal mares come to life for the few minutes that they were on stage. Having seen the real thing with those sisters that Lex kept by his side back home, River wasn’t nearly as impressed as she knew she would have been otherwise.

“Enjoying the show?” came a voice from behind her.

Despite having been distracted, River didn’t jump. After all, she’d been half-expecting this ever since she’d sat down. Turning around, she feigned surprise. “Who-, oh! Why Razzle Dazzle, you silly little thing! You startled me!”

“Oh please,” huffed the aging pegasus mare, an unamused expression on her face as she sat down in the seat next to River’s. “After that stunt you pulled to get in here, you might as well have waved a sign saying ‘here I am.’”

“I really don’t know what you mean,” answered River with a smile, sitting back down. “I simply wanted to see the show that badly. It’s quite captivating.”

Razzle let out a disbelieving snort, making it clear that she wasn’t buying any of it, but didn’t press the issue. River took a moment to study the old mare. Razzle Dazzle had always struck her as the epitome of what River didn’t want to become. Wearing so much makeup that it seemed like she applied it with a trowel, it still didn’t hide the wrinkles on her face. And while her sequined red dress covered her from neck to ankle – hiding nearly all of her coat, the only way to see its natural color was with her navy-blue wings, and leaving the cutie mark that River had heard was a pair of spotlights shining on a mare sitting on a swing – it couldn’t conceal how the rest of her skin had begun to sag. Even her periwinkle-colored mane and tail looked awful, the former having been styled into a bob cut that in River’s estimation did nothing for her, but it was still better than the gaudy jewelry threaded through her tail.

The entire thing was a failed attempt to make her appear to be something other than what she was: a withered old nag. But as awful as she looked, River couldn’t imagine that she would have looked any better if she hadn’t made the attempt. That was the thing about old age: it robbed you of your looks no matter what you did. Nor did River have any doubt that Razzle was just as aware of how bad she looked, and the futility of trying to do anything about it. It was probably why the old nag was in such a bad mood all the time.

“I would have made a reservation for this seat earlier,” continued River after a moment, “but I wasn’t sure that there would still be regular shows after that bit of…unpleasantness, with Pretty Penny’s son.”

“The shows at the Palace are never disrupted,” spat Razzle. “I teach all of my girls that that’s rule number one. They go out there and sing and dance for the audience, no matter what.” Her frown deepened then, making her face even more wrinkly. “Even after some lout goes where he’s not supposed to and puts his hooves all over them.”

“I can only imagine how upset you must have been,” offered River sympathetically. “Everypony knows that you take such good care of the mares who work here.”

“Of course I do,” groused Razzle. “Everypony in Equestria knows that being a Palace girl is a mare’s dream, and even though I work them hard, it’s because I want them to be the best that they can be.”

That, of course, was a complete and utter lie. River had learned during her previous stay in Las Pegasus that Razzle Dazzle went far out of her way to make sure that the mares who worked at the Palace never had a chance to advance their careers without her say-so. She regularly switched them around the various in-house dance groups, for instance, in order to make sure that it was the groups themselves that cultivated a following, and never any of the individuals. Otherwise some of them might have gotten famous enough that they’d have clout to demand better pay, lest they go to another venue. And even then, Razzle never kept any of her girls on for more than a few years, making up some excuse to fire them after she’d decided that they’d gotten too old or too ambitious or too tired to keep up with the rigorous schedule of practicing and performing. After all, there were always more wannabe-starlets out there thinking that a stint at the Palace would make them the next big thing.

“That reminds me,” began River smoothly, “I wanted to talk to you about something.”

“I was wondering when you’d get down to business.”

Ignoring the barb, River kept speaking. “I don’t know how much you’ve heard, but Vanhoover actually fared worse than anypony imagined in the flooding.”

“Is that why you’re back here?” asked Razzle, glancing over at River. “Because if you’re still running low on funds and looking for a job, I doubt anyone would pay to see your old flank on stage.” She punctuated the insulting remark with a laugh that sounded like a bullfrog being stepped on.

Now it was River’s turn to snort. “Actually, it wasn’t me I was thinking of. You see, there are a lot of young ladies who, in the aftermath of the disaster, have nowhere to go…”

“And you think that there’s a place for them here?” sneered Razzle. “Do you know how many girls apply to work here every day?”

“I can imagine,” admitted River easily, before lowering her voice and leaning in closer, knowing that what she was about to say would, at the very least, capture the old nag’s attention.

“But there’s a pair of sisters up there whose looks, and voices, are something you won’t want to miss…”

Author's Note:

River moves on to her next target!

Will the allure of Sonata and Aria be able to lure Razzle Dazzle to Vanhoover? Or is this where River's luck runs out?

Comments

[David Silver]

I will admit, I did not expect them to come up. Looking back, it makes perfect sense. That is a sign of a good twist.

[Not so New Brony]

At first, I thought River intends to send Sonata and Aria away or lure them away with the (false) promise of fame and fortune by performing Razzle Dazzle's shows since them being out of the picture would allow her to influence Lex more easily, in her eyes at least.

Then again, the emphasis on Razzle Dazzle's age and appearance indicates that River might also share Lex's potential ability to reverse the aging process which would be a pretty good way to lure anyone in. Though I doubt she'd use that in her bargaining since she's too greedy to risk losing out on a road to her youth.

Or I'm just overthinking things and River is just luring Razzle Dazzle into visiting Vanhoover to personally scout out the siren sisters.

[Booster Spice]

When you run out of natural and medically assisted beauty, you move to supernatural beauty?

[Alzrius]

10168528 Thanks! River knows that her best bet is to appeal to each of her targets' self-interest, and in Razzle's case that means beautiful young girls who can sing and dance. Does anypony fit those criteria better than the Sirens?

Now she just has to convince her that these girls are really all that they're cracked up to be...at least enough to get her up to Vanhoover.

[Alzrius]

10168852 Actually, yes.

If we accept that beauty is measured, at least in part, by Charisma (an idea that's always been controversial, and has fallen out of favor more in recent years, but is still present in Pathfinder First Edition), then there's only so high that someone can get that score without using magical means. If the default Charisma score (i.e. the "average" appearance, in terms of beauty or ugliness) is 10, then a person can start with a maximum score of 18, with a +2 racial modifier (each human can apply this bonus to one of the six ability scores of their choice, representing humanity's inherent diversity), that's a score of 20 right there. Since 20th level is the highest you can achieve under the system normally, and you gain 1 ability point to add to a score of your choice at every fourth level, you could conceivably get your Charisma up to a score of 25 by 20th level. (Ironically, 25 was the maximum score possible under previous editions of D&D prior to Third).

Now, if we take that to be the case, then we can say that any instance of a Charisma score of more than 25 represents someone being so beautiful that it can only be supernatural. And there are a lot of ways to raise that score via magic. The most obvious are via an enhancement bonus (maximum of +6, typically via a worn magic item) or an inherent bonus (maximum +5, typically via casting wish spells or using magical tomes. Or esoteric things like a profane bonus (typically a +2 bonus received from a succubus's profane gift; most powergamer advice boards suggest petrifying her after that, to avoid the consequences that come from associating with a treacherous demon without losing the bonus if you kill her). And of course, a mythic progression will get you up to a +10 increase to whatever combination of ability scores you want (albeit no odd-numbered splits).

So in short, 25 is roughly as high as it's possible to get in "mundane" terms (though scores that high will be vanishingly rare among the population, since very few people will have a base 18 score, let alone get up to 20th level) for any ability score. Above that, you get into the realm of supernatural aptitude.

[Alzrius]

10168613 As it stands, right now River is just trying to get the job done in terms of bringing Razzle Dazzle up to Vanhoover. I doubt she seriously thinks that it will result in either of the girls working at the Palace of Prance; as she alluded to in this chapter, that's not really a very good deal for the girls who work there, since Razzle makes sure they serve her purposes and not their own. Besides, there's no way Lex would let go of his girls so easily!