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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Also, WHOO! So cool! I can't say Rarilight surprised me, and Flutterlight was surprising only in its magnitude, but Mayorlight? There's a ship I've never seen before!
ok, Twilight is a badass...and I looove it!
6456398
Twilight is a horny lady. She's just very good at keeping it under control. As for Mayor Mare, well...Twilight does like her older mares!
Hmm, pretty fun episode, I liked your own spin on things and I certainly wasn't expecting the fight at the end there.
The scenes with Rarity and Fluttershy were pretty entertaining, Twilight's comments about them and the Mayor definitely painted her as quite a horndog which I suppose isn't too far off.
Not sure how I feel about Twilight and Pinkie's relationship so far, Twilight doesn't really seem to like Pinkie much at all which I guess is understandable; if they're gonna use the Elements of Harmony though Twilight's going to need to fix her attitude pretty quick. I did like the scene with putting Spike to bed, him being an actual baby definitely changes a few things.
The scene with Nightmare Moon was pretty fun, a bit surprised Twilight didn't remark on her being some sort of bombshell like Celestia but I guess I can understand she was probably distracted. Twilight is certainly a very skilled pony to not only be a genius magic user but also a proficient martial artist, though pulling martial arts out of nowhere was kind of jarring unless I missed or just forgot a previous mention of her learning/knowing it. I hope Nightmare Moon isn't quite as much of a... cartoony villain as she was in the show, otherwise it's going to be hard to take her seriously if she's cutting off sea serpent moustaches and sticking thorns in Manticore paws.
I'm interested to see where all of this is leading to and for some reason I'm kind of hoping for a sex scene between NMM and Twilight .
Wow, so twilight wants to fuck Fluttershy and Rarity, and Mayor mare (for some reason). Well, can't say I blame her, hopefully she gets her wish.
The dialogue with Nightmare Moon felt really... Cardboard. Or scripted, or something. Not entirely sure why but I did not enjoy much of the scene.
okay, i LIKE this version of Nightmare Moon. She's a little like a mix of Hades (Hercules, not Kid Icarus) and Maleficent. She schmoozes (in her own way) but you know that if she wanted she could whoop your ass in a second. she makes commentary on life and amuses herself with the fears of others (for the record i think she was aware of the ponies filtering out of the room, but was enjoying their fear), but unlike either never once loses her temper.
6456511
Yeah, she's very much a horndog. The activity 'Scope Out Hot Mares' is on autopilot in her head. She can't stop it!
As for Twilight knowing boxing and judo, that will be explained in further detail in future chapters. What I will say is that she learned judo from a specialist in the Royal Guard, and she learned boxing from a small gym run by a zebra in New Yoke. I know it's jarring, but hey. Oddly enough, Twilight has the least experience in being more combat-effective with her higher-tier spells. It's hard to train spells that can blow up buildings and call lightning down on your enemies in secret. Little too obvious, if you know what I mean. Just the same, it's difficult to train that sort of thing with the Royal Guard because it's both excessive, takes too long to cast, and there's no one willing to attack you in armor and get struck by lightning. No one sane, anyways.
As for Pinkie, yeah, things will get straightened out as time goes on. Pinkie's a very happy mare, and Twilight is very understanding. She doesn't usually hold a grudge over such small things. Doesn't mean she won't acknowledge that Pinkie's all kinds of immature and spontaneous, which can be annoying depending on the situation.
However, I can confirm with like...99% certainty that there won't be a sex scene between Twilight and Nightmare Moon. Twilight and Luna, however...that's a maybe.
6457706 Alrighty glad to hear most of that, and that's pretty much what I was expecting regarding NMM and Twilight it was just something I was a little curious to see if it happened.
6457706 im still laughing at the two marshmellows joke and how far a quater would bounce off raity's butt
When i read about the guns, i had this picture in my head where NMM appears before them in the old castle, and just as she's about to let loose an evil laugh and an equally evil monologue, Twi just unloads like 6 magazines of lead into her with 6 levitating guns and machine rifles, then she hesitantly walks up to where lays on the floor and pokes her once "did i get it...?".
I like how Twilight's libido is always on and always in overgear. I really want to see her flirt around with Flutters for some reason, their personalities just kinda go together because they're so different, i think. Although there are a lot of characters i want to see Twi get it on with, hopefully it won't happen with too many different mares - it would just turn into a pointless clopfic in that case.
Twi's use of martial arts is interesting. I always prefer a magic powerhouse to anything else when it comes to Twi, it's just what makes her special, but that doesn't exclude other forms of offense/defense to use as well, adaptability is always the best tool after all.
6459084
Sadly, she had no guns on her at the time, but even then, I'm not sure she would've utilized them. Twilight tends to play the long game, and attacking an alicorn so bluntly is like taking a stick and whacking a hornet's nest thinking you'll come out on top.
Yyyeah, sex scenes won't be happening TOO often. The main focus of this story is the story itself, and while some may be included as filler or for entertainment value, I will mostly be having them as development between characters.
Diversity is the name of Twilight's game. She has plenty of magic at her disposal, but losing one's horn or getting it cracked will suddenly take away one of her most prominent forms of offense and defense. Not to mention, there are surefire ways to counteract magic. She's always needed to be able to rely on something aside from her magic and even her guns, to the point that she tends to rely on her physical abilities (despite her crippled leg) more than she relies on her magic, mind magic notwithstanding. She tends to abuse that fairly regularly.
6459403
Not really. The whole reason behind the research from Flashy Fit was to make it even easier for earth ponies to grow abundant crops, both to create numerous bumper crops and to give Equestria something else that no other nation can offer as a plentiful export. They are a peace-loving nation, and with a militarized nation next-door, they needed to secure plenty of allies to make attacking Equestria less of a beneficial option. With the immense increase in production all over the country thanks to Flashy Fit's research, this was well within Equestria's grasp.
So no. The Apple Family is the best in the business, but even they wouldn't be able to produce the kind of harvests they do without Flashy Fit's research. As I said in the chapter. It took place over six-hundred years ago, and they've only been building on it since.
6459500 (sigh.) point taken.
Withdrawn.
6459695
Apologies if I made you feel bad, that wasn't my intention. I suppose the reasons for Flashy Fit crafting that spell could've been made more clear in the story, but given the context of the story itself at that point, I didn't feel that sort of thing was all that important. Still isn't, probably won't come up again in the story, but I thought you'd like your curiosity sated.
6459755 i apologize too.. it was just a petty nitpick brought on by random impulse. I... probably shouldn't have mentioned it.
6459782
Meh! It's no big deal, really. I enjoy world-building like this. History makes the flavor of the text that much richer!
Well, sorry for being pedantic, but as a french guy, seeing (mostly american) people trying to speak or write french because it's beautiful or whatnot, and massacring it half of the fucking time, it just irks me.
All this to say, it should be "au naturel".
I know, it "doesn't sound the same" when read, but trust me, if you pronounce it à la française, it's actually pronounced more or less like "au naturale" would be in english, so your error is understandable.
Also, french
grammarpronounciationeverything language sucks balls.This site is little by little turning me into a french grammar nazi...
Also, great chapter by the way, love it as much as ever!
6460119
You know the funny part is, I took both French and Spanish in middle school and high school. As is befitting our absolutely garbage educational system, especially when it comes to teaching foreign languages, I can't speak a word of either! I can count to ten in Spanish...does that count? Is that impressive?!
(no it isn't)
Thank you, however! I welcome corrections to such things.
Man, this chapter was fantastic! Love Twilight's fight scenes. Hope to see another update again soon!
6461333
Glad you enjoyed it! The next chapter is probably going to be even bigger, since I'm going to be going through, y'know, the entirety of the Everfree Forest stuff and dealing with Nightmare Moon and such, sooooo yeah. Shouldn't take TOO long though.
I have to say.. I didn't think I would get into this but I did. So good on you Sir Fire Soul
6469790
Well, thank you! If you've seen my blogs as well, you know that the actual stuff with the Mafia and crime and everything is coming right after this Nightmare Moon arc. I personally can't wait to get into it, because I have plans. Oh yes, such plans...especially plans to show just how twisted Twilight actually is, and at the same time how empathetic she is. She's a very special brand of psychopath.
6470966 Can't wait for more pal! Also
Like the Joker! I mean Look at him! themarysue.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/960182-the_joker.jpg
How can you not like this face
6471009
I actually thought of the Joker a lot while coming up with Twilight's personality, but ultimately felt like emulating him would be cheap and unimaginative. Instead, Twilight is a mare deeply in control of her emotions and her thoughts, and is very well-versed at stepping out of her own headspace and into the head of others to try to figure out what they're thinking. She's studious, ambitious and driven, and is even in control of her murderous urges. However, when she has the opportunity to indulge them...she makes sure to enjoy herself.
Some ponies dress up in lingerie and set up mood lighting and music for their big night with their special someone. Twilight takes her time killing ponies and enjoying their screams and pleas for her to stop.
At the same time however, she still has empathy, something not a lot of psychopaths can say for themselves. She understands emotions and embraces them. She just doesn't let them control her.
6471516 Well Glad you went your own way this Twilight's character pal.
I am in love with this "conversation" they had. Can't wait to see more "conversations" like that.
Also i kinda wish to see reactions of other ponies to her smoking. Kinda have feeling like thats something rare in pony civilization (ponyville at least).
6473662
Hee! You pointed out something I planned on touching on later!
What a good chapter. You're particularly adept at writing fight scenes as well. It got my blood flowing nice and good.
In addition, I like how you're not making Twilight super strong or anything. You're giving her weaknesses, her leg, the back thing. It's nice to see that, even though she knows what she's doing and can hold her own, it's still difficult. Combat is almost never "easy."
Sorry for reading this chapter so late, I've been moving this past week, and while we got the internet up a few days ago, I forgot Fimfiction existed during that time.
6478897
Combat dynamics are always very different when you're going for realism. It's true that if she used her magic she could've probably gotten rid of all of them in a second without so much as getting a bit of dust on her suit, but that would also be giving away what she's really capable of. Being Celestia's student doesn't necessarily mean you're a magical powerhouse. It just means that you caught her interest, someway or somehow. Also, it would've been a waste of her magic.
On top of that, she loves a chance to really bury her hoof fetlock-deep in someone's face. That being said, everyone has the weakness involving getting on a pony's back. Really, think about it: what can a pony do once someone's got themselves situated, if they don't have magic at their disposal? The neck is exposed, the head is exposed, the back is exposed and there is no way for them to put up a defense unless they're already wearing armor.
In any case, you don't need to apologize for anything. Read it at your own pace! I'm not in any rush, you shouldn't be either.
6479753
Aren't horses pretty good at getting stuff off their backs?
6483126
By bucking them off, yes. Most things we'd associate as being easy to buck off also aren't minotaurs and griffons that can rip their throats open either, or giant manticores or timberwolves. My point is, even with other ponies, you have hoofblades, knives, guns, you get the picture. It's a huge weakness, especially since all another pony has to do is leap on your back, get their forelegs around your neck, and choke you out. Or snap your neck, either-or.
6484025
Glad to hear it! Yeah, I'm getting that a lot, but I went with a preference, and I like herms. Perhaps it wasn't necessary, but still. AU, I could get away with a lot if I really wanted to.
Oh that was cool man. (Good song choice just found them thanks to my dad)
We're overdue for more bro...
~Crystalline Electrostatic~
1:27_22/10/2015
6555179
Working on it. Just waiting for proofreading to get finished before I publish it.
My only issue is you messing with the Rainboom connection.
Damn.
That was awesome. Who doesn't love marshmallows?
Gotta admit when she walked in to the hall I was hoping for Twilight to just headshot Nightmare Moon. But you did the whole thing far better than I ever thought possible. Even the calm dialogue. A masterpiece.
Keep up the good work.
Bit of a nit pick but: you don't inhale the smoke into your lungs when you smoke a cigar and why wouldn't Twilight have a cigar cutter, or why couldn't she just use her magic to cut the cigar.
Damn son, Sparkle can kick ass.
Excellent and well done chapter. I also loved your use of tactile kinesis. Not many story use or act knowledge it or use it out side of earth ponies. I think of it all but canon. Props to you for its inclusion. can't wait to start reading the other chapters.
Awesome chapter. Loved the realism of the fight.
I would say more but I feel I'm a bit late to reply to other comments.
Twilight, don't. You'll hurt your brain trying to figure out Pinkie.
Twilight, that's not how you confirm someone can communicate with animals. Show the critter an object that Fluttershy can't see and have it tell her what it is. Repeat as necessary. Seriously. I expected better of you.
yeah, because each case costs 240 Bits!