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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
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Good to see that Twilight is remorseful for her explosion at Celestia. Really like how Octavia and Vinyl are portrayed; the real, loving relationship hidden behind a tough mask. Fits the tone of the story perfectly. Cannot wait to see what Sparkle has in store.
Backstory section felt a little too telly.
Uncouth Octavia... Pretty sure this is the first time I've seen such a thing.
One thing confuses me, the guy's name is Weaving Thought... but he doesn't want to do mind magic? That was the reason he got Twilight wasn't it? I mean it's his name, and he doesn't want to do that sort of thing?
6930695
He was experimenting at the time. He wasn't going to risk his own mind on such a complicated spell if something was wrong with it. Much better to use a child prodigy, they're easier to control and even easier to dispose of if something goes awry.
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Cockney, uncultured, and fairly uneducated. Hooray for a new Octavia!
I can see where you're coming from with the flashback part though. Then again, I wrote most of that while I was struggling to keep my nostrils mucus-free, so that's not all that surprising.
6930715 Could've been worse, I guess.
*Wakes up at 3 am and checks FiMfic for updates*
Interesting...
*Sees One Crime at a Time*
OH MAI GAWSH YAS!
Thanks for the great chapter Fire!
Heh, the accent you gave Octavia is doubly hilarious after finally hearing her real one on the show.
And please don't torment us with long waits as this story heats up.
As I'm British myself I forgive you.
The cockney accent fits just perfectly in-character.
I'm hopeful to see where this will go now.
6931104
You are indeed welcome!
Great chapter! I don't mind what you did with Octavia, it doesn't go very well with the usual picture people have of her, but that shouldn't stop anything as long as there's backstory.
I'm a little surprised we didn't hear anything about Twi's thoughts on having faced an opponent she couldn't hope to beat with pure strength, and how that changes her combat strategies.
It feels like things are setting up for Spike to get kidnapped or something...
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So wait, what enemy are you referring to that she couldn't beat with pure strength? Octavia, the Magisters, or that zebra bartender? I's confuzzled.
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She had a recent fight with a goddess (Luna/NMM) I can't remember any specific "If things hadn't lined up perfectly, I would have been dead, we can't have that can we" moments.
6935281
Hm. That's a valid thing to address, but at the same time, Twilight's very jaded and nonchalant about just about everything. I dunno, it might come up later, I'm not sure.
6935725 I can see it coming up but not yet. The way this story seems to be going she's still beyond caring about just about anything, I Feel like as she starts to get more attached to her new friends she's gonna have a harder time being so passive about all her psychosis and other problems and we'll see more moments like that start to pop up.
I couldn't help reading this, along with Octavia's lines, aloud with a subpar cockney accent.
British reader here: Not sure why you're sorry, this is exactly what we sound like - from the 'tossers' to the "You fuckin' what?!" LMAO
British reader here: Not sure why you're sorry, this is exactly what we sound like - from the 'tossers' to the "You fuckin' what?!" LMAO
Theirs no law against looking.
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No law, but plenty of hooves that may or may not be ready to fly.
Ok: VinylxOctavia is by far my favorite ship, and you knocked that backstory and initial scene out of the park! I loved both of their backstories, and cockney Octy was a great modification.
This story has so many flavors, I can't wait to pick out the next one.
Lastly: I love the suspense of how Twilight is going to solve this problem. I'm hoping John Wick style (considering your earlier skill for action sequences), but something more devious/subtle would be just as satisfying