A Red and Black Alicorn OC Has Taken Over Your Bed
moviemaster8510
Today couldn’t have gone any better.
With it being as dead at work as it was, your manager found it in his heart to let you off early. To think, you can actually go to bed before 11 tonight and sleep in through the morning! Tomorrow is going to be the best day ever, and all that separated you from it was a good night’s rest on your bed.
However, as you step in through the doors, you find yourself greeted by a most abhorrent sight: A big, black alicorn with really shitty-looking red stripes and a black-and-crimson striped mane was lying on your bed, his poorly-colored legs sprawled out to the corners and not giving you any room for yourself. Not that you would allow this abomination of imagination to be on your bed in the first place.
“Hey!” you shout. “What the hell are you doing in my bed?”
“fuk u faget,” he says. “this iz my bed nao.”
This creature literally sounds like an Xbox Live squeaker (down to the tinny, headset microphone sound), and it’s making your ear’s bleed redder than his mane.
“Shut up and get out of my house!” you demand.
“no, btich,” he screeches once again. “this bed is nao propty of Fangclaw Thundersword. no plebs aloud!”
“That’s it. I’m going to blast your candy-ass once and for all right now!”
You stuck your thumb down and it began to glow red, suddenly blasting out at him and knocking him against your wall. Though clearly disoriented, he rolls onto his hooves and faces you with pure vindication.
“stupid h8er!” he screamed. “i wont be stoped by teh leiks of u! just wach!”
With a glow of his horn and a flash of light, Rainbow Dash appeared beneath him on your bed, looking enamored and gushy.
“o fangclaq,” she moaned. “your 20% kooler than all teh other pone ever and i want to mary u!”
“Dear God!” you scream. “He’s shipping himself with Rainbow Dash and making it so she can’t even English!”
“thts right bby,” he sweetly responded as well as a five-year old kid who’s never seen a woman naked could, “come 2 me.
They began to make out on your bed, their saliva running off their faces and soaking your sheets. As stupid as this alicorn was acting, his plan worked, and you run to the bathroom and empty your dinner from earlier into the toilet.
“No,” you growl. “Nopony makes me throw up in my house and gets away with it.”
Grabbing your phone, you frantically dial and wait for the person on the other line to answer.
“Hello?” he finally asks.
“We have a live one…”
I walk back to my room and kick the door down, sporting a shit-eating grin on my face as both he and the bastardized Rainbow Dash jolt up in shock.
“kwit being a haterz!” Talonfang-or-whatever-the-hell-he-calls-himself barks. “do i need 2 block u?”
“No need to,” you reply, “because the cavalry is here!”
Suddenly, a large metallic hand rips off the entire roof over your room, revealing Optimus Prime on fire, looking down at Rainbow Dash and Thunder F- (you know what, I’m just going to call him the OC) the OC looked up to him with fear.
“You have chosen…” the machine says in a deafening metallic voice, forming a thumbs down with his hand, “…poorly!”
The hand glowed red and decimated the rest of your bedroom, somehow blasting you safely into the upstairs hallway. Getting up and looking at the ruined half of what was your house, you see no sign of your bed among the wreckage.
“Well, looks like I’m not going to bed tonight,” you say acceptingly, “but at least we got rid of that–”
“TAHTS IT!!!1” the OC screams, flying up from out of the wreckage and in between you and Optimus Prime. “YOUR ALL GONG 2 DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!”
“No can do, sonny,” an insanely familiar voice.
The OC turned, and before he could even register who was talking to him, a large wooden stick flew out and smacked him square on the forehead beside his horn. Almost as if by magic, the alicorn was rendered lifeless as a black line appeared down his body and fell down into the wreckage. Both you and Optimus turn to face your saviors to see Nicolas Cage in a black jacket and white buttoned shirt and a man with a Latias head in a red shirt and loose tie standing in the street.
You smile back and give them a thumbs up, and with a kindly salute, the two of them begin to walk away, but not before the Latias-headed man snaps his fingers. With a surprisingly muted popping sound, your house and room were back to 100% normal, and your bed had no sign of the OC left on him.
Smiling dreamily, you walk over to your comfy looking bed. The night was still young and tomorrow was still so far away yet. Without even caring that you were still in your dirty work uniform, you fall face-first onto the mattress just below the pillow, already off to sleep.
Love this chapter xD!
PRICELESS!!!!
Annd now I want a chapter with Chuckward. Maybe "Chuckward is hiding under your bed...and the pillow...and the duvet....and behind the headboard."
Oh look, it's a joke that hasn't been relevant since 2011!
Who's the guy with the Latias head
funny22.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/644.jpg
yesh
Wow, does this sound familiar to this story.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/11/26/481925__safe_solo_twilight+sparkle_animated_princess+twilight_upvotes+galore_alicorn_3d_reaction+image_sfm.gif
What the hell did I just read?
5592800 That's my thoughts about your profile pic
okay, having Nic Cage in this chapter already makes it 1000% more awesome. but, i'm with a couple other people. what's with the Latias head guy? is it somehow a reference to that one Pokemon movie where Latios and Latias take human form and have some harmless fun, and Ash falls for Latias?
5592598
5593582 He was refering to Alextrazsa and Wanderer D as you can see on their avatars.
5593134 My god... please tell me that story isn't serious.
5593923 we find it about 61% likely to have been published completely unabashed.
I knew the OC seemed familiar!
There's only one thing I can say to this!
And that is..... wat
And I loved it.
5593134
...... OWWWWWW
:)
*Slow clap that escalates into roaring applause*
Oh, GodoG ,hO
5593923
I don't take it seriously (in fact, I've never read it), but judging from what's left of the comments section (I checked back every now and again), it looks like the author was being serious.
EDIT: I retract that statement. Turns out it WAS a trollfic.
5596159 Magical is a more literal translation of the word. In common parlance, people usually use it to mean amazing. The comment wasn't about the usage of the word though, it was about the incredibly awkward sentence structure.
5596492 And here I thought these type of fics were just myth...
5596654
Thanks!
5596654
Shumë faleminderit!
5597133
5596985 You're quite welcome. (Wiktionary for the win!)
5598252 Quite amazing that this is a rushed story.
If ever I rush a story, no one will probably get it.
5597654
Çfarë? Ti s'flet Shqip?
What the huh.....I give up
Ugh. Premise might've been funny, but the ridiculousness at the end, and the switches in tense and person (you actually went from second to first person), kind of ruined it.
5610396 I personally hate writing in 2nd person, and it wasn't long before habit kicked in and brought me back to 1st/3rd (I don't remember which).
One of my other goals with this chapter was to see if I could make a story in thirty minutes or less. By and large, I think I went par for the course.
5639194
The chapter I wrote for this collab was the first thing I ever wrote in second person. That just makes it a useful exercise
...Googles "Latias."
Eeyup, Now I get it.
The OC has been dealth with.
5593134
I wonder why that story has been blasted out of the solar system by dislikes.