• Member Since 25th Feb, 2013
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Titanium Dragon


TD writes and reviews pony fanfiction, and has a serious RariJack addiction. Send help and/or ponies.

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Comments ( 65 )

I really love the worldbuilding in this story. Equestria's pre-princess history (separation of tribes, council of unicorns raising the sun) is described pretty often, but we rarely get to see it actually unfold. However, I find that the raising of the moon occurred a little too quickly to make a ton of sense for me - the story reads as if Luna rose the moon close to instantly, which is odd seeing how much Celestia struggled to raise the sun in Dawn.

Aside from that, excellent story, and quite thematically appropriate as well. I particularly liked the little touch in having Celestia be referred to as "you," then being referred with "thou" after she failed to raise the sun.

“It is not fair, sister! She does noit want you to succeed!”

not

Edit: Is it supposed to be incomplete? I'm not complaining, but it also seems fine as a one-shot.

5300359
I'm glad you enjoyed it.

And nope, it is not. It is done. I just forgot to change how it was labelled. Thanks for the catches there!

Then the rest of the circle eat their hats

5300445
Felt is delicious, didn't you know? :pinkiegasp:

Even better than before. I had to smile at this line:

A unicorn who raised the sun would be as a pegasus who cleared the skies, or an earth pony who tended an orchard; the burden is far too much for any one pony to bear. The very idea is ridiculous.

Funny how the ridiculous can become commonplace, given time.

Great work, TD. Thank you for it.

5300638
Yeah, I enjoyed slipping that little line in. :twilightsmile:

I'm glad you enjoyed the expanded version! Glad to hear it got better in the transition from minific to full story. :heart:

"Celestia(?) raises the Moon for the first time."

5300958
Well, it would be a bit of a spoiler otherwise. :derpytongue2:

5300470 nope i prefer the taste of rocks

5301064
Maud would appreciate that sentiment. :moustache:

This story is even more improved over the original, all about adorable, and like Dawn, one I quite love.

5301686
Glad you thought it was an improvement over the original! I think the extra space let me expand the scene, give more of a feel for stuff, and add in more characterization for the Archmage, as well as better establish the stakes.

Plus petulant filly Luna is adorable Luna. :heart:

5301712

The last bit is the most important part. Luna at all ages is something of an adorable brat.

5302013
One of many, many reasons to love her. Admittedly I have quite the soft spot for both the princesses.

Ohaidere, feature box. :twilightsmile:

5302388
And it wasn't even in the middle of the night for once!

Someone actually sent me a message on Skype noting that it somehow got into popular stories at four upvotes when it first went up.

Thank you for helping me out with this story, though. :heart: Probably a bit familiar looking to you, eh?

5302230

Oh yes. Each of them has pleeenty of depth to go swimming in in so many, many, many directions in a way other characters simply cannot possess, by virtue of not being at least 1,030 or so years old at a minimum

5302694
I hear they use the candles from Celestia's birthday cake to light Canterlot for the rest of the year. :duck:

I wonder if Luna objected to having a thousand candles added to her cake when she came back. Clearly she has been 29 for the last thousand years.

5302743

Luna would be fine with it, I imagine, as long as they threw her 1,000 birthday parties to go with the extra 1,000 candles!

5303209
I'm glad you enjoyed it! I'm surprised I've not seen more stories about this sort of thing.

5303378
Well, now we know where Celestia got all that cake from. "My sister has missed a thousand birthdays. Cake every day!"

That day, she got two cakes, you know, to try and get it out of the way faster.

5303591

Oh, no, she's more devious than that. You see, a normal cake simply can't fit the number of candles necessary for her birthday. So, she's had the day spread out over the year, a few candles (Or perhaps candied cherries in lieu of candles) every day. Otherwise she'd have to rely on abstract representation, and well, a Princess's birthday needs to be treated with appropriate formality, which means cake with accurate candle counts!

5303727
Ah, makes perfect sense!

I wonder if the same pony makes all the cakes, or if they rotate the duty to make sure no one gets bored with them.

5303584 I know, right!?! Well, it makes you story all the more special:twilightsmile:

Sequel, I call for a sequel!! If it were an entire series I'd read it! I'm going to go check out your other stories now. :pinkiehappy:

5304654
I'm glad you enjoyed it!

Well, this itself is a sequel to Dawn, so if you haven't read that yet, you'll definitely enjoy that one.

As for further sequels/prequels to this, I have a few ideas but I've got a lot of other stuff I'm working on, too. We'll see. I have some vague ideas for the story of how each of them became an alicorn, as well as a couple other "when they were young" ideas, but they'll likely be on the backburner for a while as I have some other stories I'm trying to finish (though a few of those feature Celestia prominently, and two feature Luna and Celestia prominently - though in the present in those cases).

I do have two other Luna and Celestia stories which have been published which are set in the present day: The Stars Ascendant and The Butterfly's Burden. They're two of my better regarded stories, so hopefully you'd enjoy them regardless.

But I write a wide variety of stuff; feel free to browse. I like everything I've published, but I'm a bit biased. :raritywink:

This is also great! :twilightsmile:

5305237
Glad you enjoyed them both! :heart:

5305242 No really brother your writing is awesome!

5305246
Well, if you're interested in other Luna/Celestia stories I've written, both The Stars Ascendant and The Butterfly's Burden feature them, though both of those stories are set in the present day. Both were generally fairly well-received, so you might enjoy them as well.

Can Celestia bring Whitney Housten back?

5303747

I'd imagine that in the royal kitchens, one entire section is dedicated to Creative Cake Production!

5305561
No wonder she chose to visit the Cakes in Ponyville.

5305638

Probably behind the extended Cake Family we have yet to meet. Over the centuries she's ensured at least one in every town, solely in case she drops in for a visit.

5305890
That'd be quite the conspiracy!

I don't put it beyond her. Nothing is beneath someone with that kind of craving for cake. Nothing!

5300359 Actually in the first story Celestia mentions Luna is the better student. In other words Celestia may be gifted, but Luna is an outright child prodigy. Also that was after Celestia lowered the moon, which she mentioned she has more trouble with. Assuming Luna is the same but in reverse, for obvious reasons, she had an advantage because she didn't have to lower the sun first.

5305915

Pie is beneath her craving for cake. Also, I yield one half of this contest and shall be the first to note that I think we're both seeing who gives up first on the comment chain!

When I read the description, I was like "WHAT?! Celestia is doing Luna's job?!"
Then at the ending I was like "OH MY GLOB!!! LUNA DID IT!!!"
I need an epilogue or a sequel to this...

5314385
Glad to hear you liked it, even if the story summary was a bit tricksy. :raritywink:

But come on, I couldn't give away the ending, now could I?

I mean, I already did that with Dawn...

I have some vague ideas for other stories set in the ancient era, but no immediate plans for them. But if I do come up with some, I'll definitely be letting everyone know.

I saw you looked at The Stars Ascendant as well. If you liked all three of those, you'll probably enjoy The Butterfly's Burden as well, if you haven't read it already.

Thanks for reading! :twilightsmile:

5315029 I read all except Butterfly's Burden... I will though

Holy Crèpe things are going down here. Now I want to read more :fluttershysad:

5427630
I may at some point write more stories set in this era, but I have yet to do so.

I'm glad you enjoyed this to the point where you were left wanting more, though. :twilightsmile:

I do have two other stories which are set in the modern day and heavily feature Luna and Celestia which you may enjoy. The Butterfly's Burden is probably closer to this story tonally, but you'd likely enjoy The Stars Ascendant as well - it is my most popular story, and fairly short.

An excellent story. I would have pointed out the inaccuracy in the summary, but it seems that someone already beat me to it, and that you'd answered. One issue, though:

pointing her horn straight out towards the horizon as wreathed herself in heavenly fire once more.

It looks like you're missing a word in this clause.

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