• Member Since 18th Apr, 2012
  • offline last seen 11 hours ago

Wrabbit


Comments ( 143 )

Shipping.

Shipping everywhere.

Pssssst! Showing you this so you don't accidentally make your story, which looks entertaining, into an accidental carbon copy.

When will Twilight have a shipping board that has every pony, Griffon, dragon, and timelord in Equis on it?
And when will she go insane and show everybody after kidnapping them.

Shipping goggles have become rather popular. I can understand why.

Those goggles should come with a neat little manila folder.

Oh Twilight, there's a difference between shipping and two ponies who wanna have some Fun.

Anyway this seems interesting, I can see a lot of hijinks happening with this. Can't wait for more!

Giving her friend a strained smile, I lightly replied,

i like the story, but you do change point of view a lot. You go from Twilight talking (I lightly replied) to a narrative version (Giving her friend a strained smile. You do thins several times in the story. It needs to be "Giving my friend a strained smile, I lightly replied," Or "Giving her friend a strained smile, she lightly replied,"

I don't write, so I can't remember the proper terms for this...oops...but I do know it's distracting. I do like the story though. :twilightsmile:

Wait a minute. I read your stuff all the time and I love it. i've never seen you make those kinds of mistakes before. What the hey???

4826718 This story has adult content. I'm sure it won't be the same. :twilightblush:

Let's just hope that "X's Shipping Goggles" doesn't catch on, though. :twilightoops: I still remember how I started the "X's Library" incident, and all the people who blindly followed...

I don't know who will be shipped in this, but if it's written by you and says Fillyfoolers, then I guess I will give this a chance.

Well, that was an awkward start for Twilight there. She's going to remember that you have to establish a methodology (i.e. understand the problem) before approaching research, right?

I've never really been one for shipping goggle stories but... I do like this, dood. This is getting pretty good.

This one definitely looks like it'll turn out fun!:pinkiehappy::pinkiecrazy::heart:

4827239

Well...perhaps, but Rainbow Dash's Shipping Goggles isn't complete yet, either, so the author of that one might add a tag. Who knows? Either way, I just figured I'd let Wrabbit know, y'know? :twilightsheepish:

I don't know why, but for some reason I can't help but think that this is partially inspired bya manga.

The "Shipping" on the Shipping Goggles in the cover art is photoshopped, but still, how the fuck would those goggles work, with Twilight's big ass head taking up the space.

So begins Twilight's Secret Shipping Diary: The Story. :pinkiecrazy: Let's go!

4827709

so the author of that one

How long until you notice......:trollestia:

Sorry, I couldn't resist. But Flint Sparks is the author of "Rainbow Dash's Shipping Goggles." :twilightsmile:

4826682
ALL the ships! :pinkiecrazy:
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i38.photobucket.com/albums/e132/whiterabbit75/554071__safe_animated_meme_cute_adorable_fillivanilli_spoiler-colon-s04e14_adorableasfuck_boop_dog_zpsf6bb825c.gif
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Thanks for the heads-up, but I never go looking for stories with a similar premise as mine in case I accidentally get influenced by them, and so that no one can claim that I'm stealing ideas. :ajsmug:
4826799
Well, this isn't going into Twilight's Dollhouse territory, so I think it's safe to assume that while the former might happen, the latter definitely won't. :eeyup:
4826807
I can't speak to their popularity, but this promises to be a fun ride. :rainbowwild:
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Not sure if I get the reference. :trixieshiftright:
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Twilight's pretty sheltered, so she doesn't really get that mentality. :twilightoops:
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This is what happens when you change perspectives at the last minute. I'll go through it again with a fine-toothed comb to get the mistakes when I have a moment. :twilightblush:
4827239
Honestly, I didn't even know about your story until just now. It'll be on my read later list until I can finish this one. :derpytongue2:
4827295
There will be some hetero ships, but be prepared for a lot of fillyfooling. :pinkiehappy:
4827465
To be fair,she hadn't even decided whether or not she would even do it until after the party. :twilightsheepish:
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:rainbowkiss:
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It might have been without me realizing it. Manga is a big influence on my life. :raritywink:
4828119
I think it's just a sticker that is removed before use. :moustache:

4828990 Ahh man...
Also, will he's shipping goggles ever overload and actually have her physically SEE the ships. Like, signs of being I'm a relationship that her goggles over did?
Kind of like how if you distort sound in a sentence, they don't know what it means. But if you tell them, they hear it. She's telling herself their in a relationship, and tricks herself into physically seeing it.

4828553

Yeah, I spotted that as I read your comment. :facehoof: Either way, though! This story looks promising, you know?:twilightsmile:

4828990 It's a reference to Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipping Folder. I'd link it if I wasn't so lazy. :derpytongue2:

*Sees Title*

this better not be Rip Off or Plagirizim im smellin...

4830360 I, on the other hoof, am always happy to link to Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder. :twilightsmile:
Now on with the fillyfooling hijinks! :pinkiehappy: :heart: :rainbowwild:

This can get only get better. Most awesome intro and most excellent story.

The start of this felt a little too serious and intense, but perhaps that's more what you were going for, but the situation struck me as something more light-hearted and Cadance's sudden intensity felt really out of place.

Maybe it only works when somepony compatible is nearby? If so, what is the range? Ugh! There's just too many questions left unanswered, and I'm still not sure I want to pursue this field of study!

Now there's that overly-analytical adorkable Twilight I was missing.

There were a couple of times that you referenced Twilight as 'she' instead of 'I', but I figure that's just a symptom of switching it to 1st person at the last minute; hard to catch em all I guess.
Also, a couple of grammar pet peeves:twilightsheepish::
You used 'paw' a couple of times to reference Spike's hands. A paw has both soft pads and claws, like the feet of canines, felines, and ursines. It's perfectly fine to use 'hands/feet' and 'claws' with Spike.
You also used 'whom' in a couple of places that should have been 'who'. A good trick for determining who vs. whom is to replace it with he/she or him/her. If you can replace it with he/she then use 'who'; if him/her is appropriate then use 'whom'.

Looking forward to seeing this continue, and good luck with your experimentation into 1st person perspective erotic scenes.:twilightsmile:

4829157
That may or may not come into play. :raritywink:
4829311
They can be taken off? :rainbowhuh:
4829433
Such is the way of half-assed licensed products. Kinda like how they only use Faust's original concept art in all their licensed products instead of bothering to make up new art. :ajsmug:
4830193
I try to discourage that sort of thing. Everyone is free to have their own opinions as well as express them. I only ask that said opinions are not couched with insults. :trixieshiftright:
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Like I told another, I try to avoid reading other stories with a similar premise as mine, to avoid being influenced by it, and so that no one can say that I'm plagiarizing. :twilightblush:
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I approve of that picture. Anything to throw Flash off of Twilight's scent. :trollestia:
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Thank you kindly. :twilightsmile:
4832626
Well, the srs bsns was due to how seriously Cadance takes it; though, she does have a point. Gotta be careful when messing with people's hearts. As to your pet peeves, I've always used paws for dragons, since they only have partially opposable thumbs and talons instead of nails. I know Spike is a bit different, but it's just one of my things. Call it a quirk. Who/Whom is always a tough one to remember; worse even than semicolons. :twilightsheepish:

4835865 It's actually a card game about Twilight shipping everyone in weird and wonderful ways. :twilightsheepish:

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I never said it was. I was speaking in general terms. :unsuresweetie:

4835865
But, semantic accuracy!:twilightangry2: Paws have soft pads and talons specifically refer to birds (usually birds-of-prey), lizards (and by extension dragons) don't have those. I'm honestly amazed I haven't noticed you using 'paw' for Spike before. Also, for who/whom, that's why I gave you a convenient and easy to remember way to discern which to use. It took me forever to really get the concept till I learned that trick.

I will also second the recommendation to play Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder. It's a hilariously fun card game to play at meetups and cons, or just with a couple of brony friends, and no worries on plagiarism stuff from it since it's pretty much built around creating crackships, and that doesn't seem to be even a small facet of this story.

4835865 And that's why they pay me the big bits.

4836348

Word definitions are not a matter of "grammatical accuracy", but "semantic accuracy". Next time you hear someone saying something is "just semantics", know that they're saying the definition of words is irrelevant, and also probably being a dink.

Which word you use is a question of semantics. Which order you put them in is a question of grammar.

New Wrabbit fic with best pone playing the shipping faerie? I can get behind this.

Faved.

4838293
Thanks, I knew when I was writing it that it wasn't quite the word I wanted, but for some reason "semantics" just wouldn't come to mind so I settled.:twilightsheepish:

In all the other instances where Twilight used her "Shipping Goggles" she was seeing little inferences, like body language, but here you put in

I could tell that there was somepony in whom she was interested, but the line connecting them just sort of disappeared in a kind of squiggle. What did that mean?

When did she ever start seeing cords attaching people or such like that? Was that an over sight from a previously written in idea you changed or something like that?

Shipping Goggles can't look inward Twi. Sorry

So oblivious.

So Pinkie is setting up an orgy, which Twilight is going to play voyeur at, while unwittingly attempting her own with Ink Well, Octavia, and Cheerilee. I have a feeling Cadance is going to be rolling on the floor laughing when she gets the full story en aftermath.

I concur with Genjen. Chapter One made "Shipping Goggles," sound like it was just a cute name for an observational skill Twilight picked up from hanging around Cadence so often. Now its presented as a form of specialized magical sight and its confusing.

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Yeah, I kinda messed up with that. Not sure what I was thinking there. I had something planned, but then it just sorta... went pear-shaped. I'm gonna fix it this weekend, hopefully be done by sometime tomorrow. Sorry guys. I just had a major brain fart. Thanks for catching that, though. :facehoof:
4857368
Heh, heh. It always looks so obvious when it involves someone else, doesn't it? :rainbowwild:
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I may have been a bit too heavy-handed with that party thing. :twilightsheepish:

What happened? On my computer I have chapter 2 up, but when I switched to the laptop chapter 2 disappeared.:rainbowderp:

4857168 4857516
Okay, should be fixed now. Thanks for pointing that out before it got too far. I'm off to bash my head against the wall until I'm not so stupid anymore. :facehoof:
4857899
My fault. I had to take the chapter down real quick for a little retooling. It should be fine now. Thanks for your understanding. :twilightsheepish:

I cannot wait to see this party. Zomg. Most excellent chapter.

I just can't wait until Twilight goes to the Princess. Oh the fun she can have at the castle....

4857965
It happens at times, glad I was able to help. I'll say, I'm glad you moved away from the cord thing as it felt like it cheapened the story. Sadly, now the chapter doesn't feel as strong as it did before since it was originally based around those cords. A trade off I guess, but with your idea more firmly in mind I'm sure you'll recover and deliver a more focused chapter next time. The observational inference approach really is more interesting since it has room for speculation and leaves you wondering if she isn't just trying to be a meddlesome matchmaker or if there really is magic involved.

just how that deep fryer ended up attacking, and chasing that reporter across Canterlot, even if he did totally deserve it.

Those wild magic surges that have nothing to do with Twilight are just amazing, couldn't have happened to a more deserving target pony though.

I see that Twilight will have to once again fight her own utter obliviance since she can't pick up who somepony is infatuated with when it's her. I look forward to innumerable shenanigans with this.:rainbowlaugh: Starting with Vinyl's orgy—yeah it was heavy-handed but if it wasn't then we couldn't laugh at Twilight's oblivious reaction to not being invited.

This is feeling a lot like the early portions of TSW, and I for one gladly trumpet the return of our adorkable, awkward, oblivious overlord.:twilightsmile:

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