Chapter 9: Lightning and Cherry
A Gift from Celestia
Chapter 9: Lightning and Cherry
Admiral Biscuit
True to her word, Ditzy had come by the nurse’s office the next morning on her way to work. Tenderheart had given her the stack of pamphlets, and most importantly, the form which would serve as her reprieve. She’d jammed them into her saddlebags alongside her lunch, and flown off to work.
Now she was sitting under a tree, the pamphlets in front of her, puzzling her way through them. There were a lot of big, important-sounding words, words that she probably should have known, but they hadn’t been covered in school. She could have gone back to the clinic, but Tenderheart had seemed kind of disappointed in her. She wasn’t sure why—she’d kept her promise, so why was Tenderheart grumpy?
It's the best thing, she thought, taking a nibble out of her sandwich. I'll do it, and it'll be over. That's it. I can make the appointment tonight, wait out the week and not tell anypony, and then things will go back to normal. She looked up at the sky briefly. I'll be able to do a day's work without getting sick, I won't wake up needing to puke—it'll be like nothing ever happened. Mother won't get mad, Papa will think the ginger root did the trick, and things will go back to like they were before.
She took another bite of her sandwich, closed the pamphlet, and grabbed another one the nurse had given her. This one was all about birthing, something she really didn't need to know about, but she was kind of curious. She hadn’t read that far in the book she’d gotten from the library.
She was struggling through the mechanics of lactation when Lightning landed beside her. “Hey, kid, I wondered where you went. Lunch break’s over.”
“Oh, horseapples! Sorry, sorry, I got distracted.”
Lightning looked around at Ditzy’s half-eaten lunch and the pamphlets in front of her. A broad smile broke out on her face. “Hey, congratulations! No wonder you’re distracted.” She tapped her hoof on the grass, before sitting down beside Ditzy. “When’s the foal due?”
“There won’t be one,” Ditzy said. “The nurse said that I could have a procedure that would make it go away.”
Lightning blinked and looked at Ditzy’s guileless face. She pinned her ears back and jerked to her hooves, kicking a divot behind her. Her head dropped and she snorted before snapping her wings out. Wordlessly, Lightning backed away from Ditzy before she turned tail and leapt into the air.
Ditzy watched her leave with a mild sense of alarm. She hastily stuffed the pamphlets in her bag before leaping into the air and giving chase. Her sandwich was a casualty of war, left to be discovered and eaten by the small animals that roamed the park.
Even with the head start Lightning had gotten, it was no contest. It wasn’t for nothing that Ditzy had been three-time distance champion in Los Pegasus, and after months of working on weather patrol, she knew the air currents around Ponyville like the back of her hoof. She might not have been the fastest pegasus in Ponyville, but she knew all the tricks to boost her speed, and Lightning didn’t. Ditzy caught up with her co-worker before she was even halfway back to their work area.
“Hey, what’s going on?” Ditzy asked. “How come you just flew off like that?”
Lightning didn’t answer; she just skirted a cloud and bucked it towards Ditzy, who had to pull up sharply to avoid crashing.
Her forward momentum gone, she watched Lightning blaze off into the distance, but the race wasn’t over yet. There were good updrafts this time of day along the hills, and Lightning was headed right towards them. Ditzy rolled over on her back and dove, picking up airspeed as fast as she could.
Her eyes locked on a tree. It was about the right distance away . . . using it as a reference point, she continued her upside-down dive, keeping her wings and hooves tucked in tight. Her mane was billowing by her face as she cannonballed towards the ground. When she judged she’d picked up enough speed, she flared her wings open again, gently tilting them to pull out of her dive without losing too much airspeed.
She rolled back upright and shot over the top of the tree, yanking her hooves up to avoid stripping the crown or tangling up in the branches. She was still picking up speed, and she knew the updraft was close—as soon as she felt the buffeting on her wings, she headed up, letting the wind do the work for her.
As soon as she crowned the hill, she began flapping furiously. keeping as much speed as she could. She saw Lightning coming, glancing behind her—she’d never think to check in front and below for Ditzy.
Her timing was perfect—she rolled on her back under a low cloud and kicked it upwards hard. Lightning slammed into it and tumbled to a halt on the top, and Ditzy was on her before she could move, pinning her on her back.
“What the hay, Lightning? What’s gotten into you? You coulda just said that we had a lot of work to do.”
“You really don’t know.” Lightning spit at her.
“I’m not gonna know unless you tell me, okay? You got a knot in your tail, huh? I thought we got along better than that, but if you want to scrap to settle this thing, we can do that.”
“You wanna know why I’m upset? Is that it?”
“Yes!” Ditzy let her up, and the two mares stood muzzle-to-muzzle.
“Because you’re dumb and selfish! All you do is think of yourself, not anypony else.” She leaned in towards Ditzy and began to advance as Ditzy started backing on the cloud. “You didn’t learn anything at school, except how to be a spoiled mule who won’t even take responsibility for her own actions!”
“It’s gonna be a unicorn,” Ditzy whined. “I can’t have a unicorn.”
Lightning blinked, then clouted Ditzy in the head, knocking her over. Without another word, Lightning glanced over the side of the cloud and backflipped off before Ditzy could get to her hooves, dropping sideways towards the ground.
Ditzy jumped behind her. She guessed that Lightning was going to head for the grove of trees and try and lose her in there, so she kept more altitude, not wanting to commit herself until she saw what Lightning was up to. However, instead of doing what she’d expected, the white pegasus banked the other way, heading for Sweet Apple Acres. Too late, Ditzy realized her misjudgement, and dove after Lightning.
Lightning banked hard, skimming over a fallow field before blasting into a cornfield, Ditzy hot on her hooves. Lightning dropped lower, aiming for the split-rail fence that delineated the edge of the field. Ditzy drew in a sharp breath as Lightning banked dangerously sharply, grabbing a corn plant in her teeth before yanking her wing clear of the ground.
Instead of continuing her flight, Lightning pulled up hard, the corn still in her teeth. Ditzy could see her sides heaving as she panted around the stalk.
Without a word, Lightning landed, walking to a flat rock that jutted up over the tall grass beside the field. She set the corn on top of the rock, and began stomping it into oblivion.
“What the hay is wrong with you?” Ditzy glared at her boss.
She leaned down and bit the immature ear in half, then began grinding it to a paste under her hoof. “You see this plant? It was alive—it was going to be something. Now? Now it’s nothing but garbage.”
Lightning jumped off the rock and advanced on Ditzy. “And you want to do the same thing to your foal, huh? And you’re asking me what’s wrong with me?” She jabbed a hoof in Ditzy shoulder. “What’s wrong with you?”
“It’s a procedure,” Ditzy said. “Just a procedure.”
“That’s your procedure,” Lightning spat, pointing to the pathetic remains of the corn plant. “You stay away from me, you monster. Fly home, and don’t come back.”
Without another word, she took to the sky, racing off to the east.
Ditzy walked over and looked at the obliterated corn plant. It had largely been reduced to a green stain on the rock.
She looked back over at the field where it had been planted. There were hundreds of other corn plants, maybe thousands. The field didn’t look any emptier because it was missing. She trotted up to the fence, looking at the neat rows of corn until she found a hole with a spray of dark-colored soil fanning away from it.
It was unmistakably an empty spot in the field.
“Lightning shouldn’t have done that,” she said quietly. “The Apples work so hard to make sure everypony’s fed.” She knew that their youngest daughter did farm chores every day before she came to school, and did more when she got home. Throughout the summer, she’d seen her working in the fields and groves, making sure that every one of their plants got the nurturing it needed to thrive.
And one reckless move from a pegasus had ended that corn plant forever.
Sooner or later, one of the Apples would come along, and would see the empty hole in the field. They wouldn’t know what had happened, or why. Her heart beat fast. If they came along while she was still hanging out by the field, they might think she’d done it.
Ditzy looked around guiltily before making a beeline towards town. She glanced down at the field as she flew—she could see the empty spot for much longer than she thought she should be able to.
She kept low, just skirting the treetops. Her flight was wavering and unfocused as her adrenaline burned off and she worked through her tiff with Lightning. It wasn't like the doctor would take the foal out of her and smash it against a rock, and ponies weren't plants.
But Lightning had been very angry. Like she was making a wrong choice, somewhere. She couldn't raise a foal, especially not a unicorn. She'd never seen a unicorn in the clouds.
Without consciously realizing where she'd been going, she found herself at Cherry's small orchard. Ditzy glided down to a landing between the rows of cherry trees, reached under her barrel for the buckle on her saddlebag, and stripped it off. She breathed a sigh of relief as her sweat-stained coat was exposed to the air.
She rolled over on her back, twisting against the soft grass, letting it soothe and cool her.
A minute later, Cherry leaned over her. “The grass in the east pasture is softer,” the earth pony said. “What's with the lather?”
“Me and Lightning got in a fight,” Ditzy said. “I chased her halfway around Ponyville. And then—“ Her ears slumped and she dropped her head on the ground.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Ditzy nodded, looked down at a sprig of grass in front of her nose, and took a deep breath.
“Papa made me go to the nurse 'cause I was sick in the morning and he was worried about me and I tried to get out of it, but he insisted I go. She said I was—was pregnant but that I could have a procedure which would make the foal go away and I have enough bits saved up and then mother wouldn't know and couldn't get mad at me for fooling around with a mudpony. And papa wouldn't be disappointed, but when Lightning found out she was mad and said I was a monster and now I don't know what to do.”
“I . . . um, okay.” Cherry frantically tried to sort through her thoughts. “Alright. So you went to the nurse, and she confirmed that you're pregnant.”
“I sorta guessed before.” Ditzy sniffled. “I started putting on weight, and I was sick in the morning, and Goldie said that her mom had morning sickness and mood swings.” She rolled on her side, away from Cherry. “But I could have hid it.”
That never works, Cherry thought.
“The nurse said I could have a procedure, and I was going to do that as soon as I could, but I don't know why Lightning thinks it's a bad thing. Princess Celestia wouldn't let the doctors do it if it's bad, right?”
“No, she wouldn't.” Cherry nuzzled Ditzy's wing. “You have to make the best choice for yourself, Ditzy. It's your body, and you get the final say—not me, not your parents, not the nurse.”
“That's what Nurse Tenderheart said, too.” Ditzy said glumly. “But what if I don't know? I don't want Lightning mad at me. How come she doesn't understand why I have to?”
“Because . . . maybe she's not thinking of it logically?”
Ditzy chuckled. “Yeah. Us pegasi are impulsive.”
“See, I think of it like, well, it's kind of like an unwanted tree.” Cherry motioned to the neat row of trees in the orchard. “Like, maybe a maple tree that got in here by mistake. Sometimes a tree starts growing where I don't want it to, and I have to decide if I want to transplant it, or just chop it down before it gets too big.”
“Transplanting is like where you dig it up, and then move it somewhere else, right?”
Cherry nodded. “It's a lot of work, and sometimes the tree doesn't do well in its new place, especially if it's a few seasons old. It's kind of like—well, if you have the abortion, that’s it. It's done. If you keep the foal until it's born, and then give it up for adoption, then it's like you did a lot of work and didn't get anything out of it in the end. And maybe the new home isn’t good for it.
“The point is, just 'cause you've got a foal in your belly doesn't mean you have to keep it there. Sometimes it's best if you don't. Berry Punch probably shouldn't've—or she could have given Pinch up for adoption."
“Pinch is cute.”
“I know, but Berry . . . she's not really a good mother.”
Ditzy turned onto her belly and looked at Cherry. “That's a mean thing to say about your friend.”
“Well, it's true.” Cherry shrugged. “I guess she might wind up surprising us, but I don't see it. Probably Pinch's first word's gonna be a swear. Anyway, I think Lightning was mad 'cause she pictures a foal in there, and thinks you're gonna hurt it.” She poked Ditzy in the side.
“Isn't that what's in my tummy?”
“It's more like a seedling right now. Just a little sprout.”
“What do they do with it, anyway?” Ditzy looked up at her saddlebags. “The pamphlet didn't say—just that the doctor takes it out. He's got to put it somewhere, right?”
“I dunno. I guess they just bury it behind the hospital, in the cemetery.”
“Ew.” Ditzy looked back at her barrel. “I don't know how it'd feel, to know that something that was in me—was a part of me—is in a cemetery. It'd be like I cut off a hoof or something.”
Cherry lay down on the grass next to Ditzy. “It's just like getting your mane trimmed, or your hooves filed.”
“I guess.” Ditzy rolled one eye upward to look at her ragged forelock. “The pamphlet says that they put you to sleep for the procedure.”
“So you won't know anything.”
“I'm kind of scared of that.”
“It's a little weird,” Cherry said. “They put a little mask on you, and it smells really funny, and then the next thing you know you're waking up in a hospital bed.”
“Did you have one? Is that how you know about it?”
“No, I broke my left fore coffin bone when I was a filly. Playing around, landed on a rock. Cracked my hoof, too. I had to wear a special shoe on that hoof the rest of the summer.” She smiled faintly. “Everypony at school called me peg-leg the next year, but then I had my growth spurt, and after a few little scuffles, nopony called me that anymore.”
“How long were you there?”
“Just a day. But I wasn't allowed to use that leg for two weeks, and I had to go back for a couple of exams, to make sure it was healing right.” She twisted her hoof around, and then held it close to Ditzy. “You can still see a little scar in my coat, from where they had to cut me open to fix it.”
Ditzy flattened her ears. “They had to cut you open to fix a bone? Some of the mares in Las Pegasus got broken wings, and they just had casts. Are they gonna have to cut me open to get the foal out?”
“I think the doctor just goes in under your tail. Doesn't it say in the pamphlet?”
Ditzy shook her head. “They don't say how the procedure works, just that a doctor does it.”
“Well, it makes sense. That's where a foal would normally come out.” She rubbed her hoof against Ditzy's withers. “Kind of weird to think that you fit out your mom's vagina once, isn't it? And now you're big enough to have your own foal.” She looked up at the rows of trees thoughtfully. “Each one of those trees started off as just a cherry pit, and now look at them.” Cherry stood up and nudged Ditzy. “Come on. Let's go to the house. Maybe have a drink—we can talk some more over a drink.”
“The nurse says I'm not supposed to drink.”
“Well, if you're planning on getting rid of the foal, it won't matter, right?”
Ditzy nodded, and got to her hooves. “You're probably right . . . but maybe I shouldn't, just in case. Shouldn't have the drink, that is. Not until I'm really, really sure.”
“You're not thinking—okay, listen. Friend to friend.” Cherry turned and looked her in the eye. “Whatever you decide, Ditz, I'll be there for you, whether I think you made the right choice or not. I've got my opinion; I know what I'd do if I was in your shoes.”
Ditzy lifted a hoof. “I don't wear shoes.”
“Not my point. I know what I'd do. I'm not ready for a foal, not yet. I'll know when the time comes—I'll know deep inside that it's time. You need to be sure for yourself, okay? Don't go doing or not doing something you'll regret later on. Come on inside; I’ll make you a cup of herb tea”
• • •
After they’d had a drink, Ditzy went outside and flew up to the porch roof, and just lay there, trying to clear her mind. Everything had seemed so simple this morning. Have the procedure, and things would go back to how they had been before.
Now she knew that wasn't the case. For starters, she wouldn't be able to work with Lightning Bolt any more—and maybe not with anypony. Surely Lightning would tell their supervisor why Ditzy couldn't be her partner anymore, and word would get around.
She could lie—she could pretend that she hadn't had it done—and that would work for a while, but then she'd have to come up with some reason why she'd lost the foal. She vaguely remembered from her sex ed class that miscarriages happened sometimes. The library might have books about it, and she could learn enough to come up with a good story.
But even if she did—she'd feel terrible first lying about keeping the foal, and then again lying about losing it. When the weather team found out about those lies, they'd want nothing more to do with her. Not ever.
Plus, there was no way to compartmentalize. While Mother preferred that the three tribes stick to themselves, there were too many ponies here that were loosely related to each other, and when they got together they gossiped. It might take a while for her lies to be revealed, but eventually everypony would know.
The more she thought about it, the more she came to understand that at best she'd be postponing her parents' inevitable discovery by a few months, and maybe not even that long.
She looked down at her belly regretfully. If only I'd known before that there were safe ways to prevent foals. It was too late now—the clouds were out of the factory.
Ditzy looked up at the sky, and thought back to all the things Lightning had taught her. Things about making the best of what you were given. The cloud metaphor was apt, she decided. They didn't always get what they wanted, but they could deal with whatever they were given. Hadn't they done it time and time again?
I'm not old enough to raise a foal, she thought. I don't know how.
I don't even have a house.
I don't even know how to live by myself.
She looked at the thatching under her. Cherry knew. She was down in the yard, her muzzle in the dirt, working in her garden. They'd never learned anything like that in school. Cherry had probably been in her family's garden as soon as she was out of diapers, and she'd been working on their farm every single day of her life since then. She knew all about plants and trees and weeds and things like that. She knew how to fix stuff—all Ditzy knew was how to form clouds, and how to fly marathons. Neither of those skills seemed terribly useful at present. She was coming to realize that school hadn't prepared her for life.
Ditzy stood up and extended her wings for the short trip back to the ground. She was good at gliding, at least—another skill which didn’t help with her current predicament—and she landed right next to Cherry.
“Hey.”
Cherry spit a mouthful of weeds out. “Hey, Ditz.”
“I was thinking.”
Cherry nodded.
“You said,” she paused, choosing her words with care. “You said that you don't think Berry Punch is a good mother.”
Cherry nodded again.
“But you and Golden Harvest both went over to her house to get it ready for spring. And visited her in the hospital, and stuff like that. So you weren't mad at her. You're willing to help her out, even if you don't agree with her raising the foal.”
“Look, I'm going to speak my mind, but don't tell Berry I said this.”
Ditzy nodded. “Cross my heart and hope to fly.”
“If she had a stable family, I think she'd do all right. But Cormano's useless. I doubt he'll last a year, and he won't motivate her to do anything. He's going to see that it's a lot of work raising a foal, and she's not putting out like she used to, and there are greener pastures. It wouldn't be the first time for him, not from what I've heard.” She picked the weeds back up and carried them over to a basket. “For what it's worth, Goldie doesn't agree with me. I hope she's right, and I'm wrong. Because she is my friend, and I don’t want to see her get hurt."
Ditzy grabbed a mouthful of weeds and headed over towards the basket. For a while, the two mares worked in silence. For the pegasus, it was a new experience. She'd never done any gardening before.
After each basket got full, they carried them off to Cherry's compost heap and dumped them on top of the pile. When they were all done, Cherry showed her how to turn the pile so that the new plants would start decomposing more quickly.
It was a different kind of work from clouds, and the feeling of mud in her coat was sort of refreshing. It felt like she'd accomplished something worthy.
“When you got your homestead, did you ever think you weren't ready?”
“All the time,” Cherry admitted. “The first year, especially. I was afraid that the trees weren't going to make it through the winter. I had to do a lot of stuff I didn't want to in order to get by, but my parents said if it didn't work out I could—“ She gave Ditzy a suspicious look. “I could give it up and move back with them.” She sighed. “Look, Ditz, it's getting late, and if you want to make it home without your mom asking too many questions, you'd probably ought to head that way. No matter what you do, I'll stand with you as a friend.”
“You won't tell anypony, will you?”
“Not until you say so.” Cherry motioned with her hoof. “Come on, let's get the mud off your fetlocks.”
• • •
Once she was clean, Ditzy bade her goodbye and flew off, circling Cherry's farm once before heading towards town. Rather than fly directly home, though, she took a path towards the hospital.
She landed on the roof and stared at the neat rows of stones behind the hospital.
She stood there for a very long time.
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Hope Derpy gets somewhere to stay.
This story is really good at covering both sides of Ditzy's choice. The way Lightning and Cherry's present their views is very different and quite compelling. Not an easy choice for Ditzy, although the source material takes a little bit of the drama out of the situation!
This is just awesome, I don't really have anything to gripe about because we know people would react precisely like this. It's a good thing Derpy has enough variety in her friends to give her a fairly good picture of both major opinions.
Keep going! ;)
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This. I thought after Lightning it was coming down on one side of the equation, but it really was nice to see both sides handled with a fair 'Here is why such strong emotions are roused'. This story is simple, in some ways, and yet super deep in others
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Thank you! One of the hardest things for an author to do is present conflicting viewpoints without letting their own biases color the story, and I'm glad that you feel it was well-handled. To be honest, this was the most difficult chapter to write for this very reason.
Just caught up with this story, as always I enjoy how much effort you put into making your settings look positively rural with just the right amount of fantasy. This story in particular does that very well I think, probably one of the best samples of magical realism on this site (or realistic magicalness as the case might be).
As others have said I found the main conflict handled very nicely and tastefully, I guess we all know how it ends but it still is a great ride.
Like someone else mentioned, I can't really see Berry F-bombing, but its your story, so I shan't complain.
Two things really stand out,
A) THANK YOU! May you receive the blessings of a thousand lifetimes.
I am *so* damn sick and tired of seeing Ditzy written like she's half brain dead. For fucks sake, she has an eye issue, that doesn't mean she can count to potato. Friggin people, off the top of my head, this story and the Lunaverse are about the only places medical condition does NOT equal mentally handicapped.
B) The abortion issue. I can't really say I saw that coming. But I like the way you handled it. You seemed to try and keep it as even sided as possible. And then had her think about it as more than just a quick fix. I doubt anyone could complain about that, no matter which side of the issue they're on.
I also like the way you had the nurse fume about 'some parents' and how she dealt with that same problem every year. Well done.
Some other stuff...
The lesson Ditzy had about QC in the real world, and out of the way places getting whats left is also dead on. You've taken some issues from here and transplanted them over there nicely. And the big chase was great. I like seeing her as someone who is good at flying and reading air currents. Having her as someone who has competed and won races, ads another layer to everyone's favorite pony.
So I'm guessing this is Dinky, since Ditzy and the mane 6 are around the same age, and Rarity already stood up for her. Though I'm not sure why anyone would care. They need protein from somewhere. And, really, cupcakes and the rest have to be worse for a pony. But no one ever gives Pinkie a second look.
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Thanks!
Thank you again! It was a real challenge to tackle both sides of the issue without being biased one way or the other.
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It just feels right to me, although I might be biased: in A Foal's First Words, 1% of the total wordcount is the F-word.
I never liked that theme, and it's one of the things that'll get me to drop a fic. Perhaps I was fortunate in reading Pony Psychology when I was first getting in the fandom . . . there are certainly some influences from that story in this one.
I've always felt that a good author can write about hot-button issues like abortion without revealing to the audience which side of the debate they're on, and I'm glad that I was able to do so. To be honest, I was expecting some outrage in the comments; I'm thankful that thus far nobody's felt the need to try and push their agenda in all caps.
Lots of real-life experience speaking there.
I read a story where she was responsible for escorting butterflies, because she was so good at understanding air currents. That just stuck with me. Way back when, there was some fan speculation that the bubbles meant she was good at understanding currents and such.
That's a pretty good guess. I will say that I'm always cautious about assuming character's ages based on how they're drawn on the show, since there are really only four body types: newborn, foal, adult, and ancient. That having been said, I think she's only a few years older than the oldest of the Mane 6.
Timothy grass is a really good source for IRL equines, as are alfalfa and clover. Fish might not be as good, since horses aren't really equipped to digest it properly--that having been said, horses have historically been given meat in their diets to supplement poor pasture grasses in Iceland and Mongolia (and probably other places I don't know of). I think it's easily believable that Equestrian ponies would do the same.
Delete end " mark.
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needs end " mark.
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You've done a tremendous job in handling the Abortion issue, writing on both ends without going to over the top. I mean we all know how it ends, but seeing the journey to there is being well done. Tons of kudos on that.
Edit:
Although now I can't wait until the next chapter. How's it coming along?
6398400
Chapter 1 corrections made, thank you!
She didn't really get a choice. As part of her job, she serves at the whim of the weather service.
Not until much later.
Chapter 2 correction made; thank you!
Interestingly, we were just discussing that in the comments on Apple Honey's Perfectly Ordinary Day. I won't get into too many spoilers here in the comments, but I'll just say that in this version of Equestria, about half of the foals in Ponyville would be considered bastards.
In this case, it should be there. Cherry Berry says the first line of text, and the Golden Harvest says the second.
The formatting got screwed up somehow. I thought I'd fixed it, but obviously I didn't. It's fixed now.
tha means 'you.' Ditzy's dad has a Yorkshire accent.
I don't think it should be, since it's a cloud factory in general. When speaking of an auto plant, for example, Lansing Car Assembly would be all capitalized, since that's the actual name of the factory; the Lansing auto plant wouldn't be, since it isn't a proper name. At least, that's how I see it.
Vernacular for 'go on.'
Yes, it was.
That's the problem with sex ed as it's taught in the US. There is no requirement to teach factual information, and you can leave out vital details in the curriculum. And that's what leads to results like this.
Nothing. 'Nowt' is vernacular for 'naught.'
Those are only deleted when the dialogue is continuous. Since there's an action tag which opens up the next paragraph, it needs to be there, even when it's the same character doing the speaking in both paragraphs.
both corrections made, thank you!
Thanks! One of the hardest things about that was putting my personal beliefs aside and presenting both sides of the argument from the character's perspectives.
I am hoping by the end of the month, but I can't promise that. My job situation changed in May, which played hell with my writing schedule, and I still haven't gotten things back on track.
6399626
So the problems of when a species that's traditionally herd orientated, with a small group of stallions (with an Alpha Stallion) with a massive group of mares meets monogamy. Honestly since potions have the ability to make life, and alter the body. And with the advancements on magic and the physics bending things there were there. It's head canon that all those futa spells are canon [well as transforming one egg into a protosperm [like scientists now in days can almost do well enough], and do test tube babies.].
But I can see a lot of mares with bastard children with the conflict of biological imperative over countless generations of evolution verses them all trying to go monogamous. And a mare rather than being that lucky 65%, getting left behind as they look for greener / better pastures.
____________________
Sorry that wasn't really clear. I thought it was Golden Harvest, going through Berry's home [since she came from there], found all that stuff, and moved onto the next line of dialog. Might want to replace 'she' with 'Cherry' but that's your choice.
___________________
http://www.grammarbook.com/punctuation/capital.asp
Not only do manmade structures get caped, but it's a particular building at a particular place. While yes you can do things like say 'opera house' but the Sydney Opera House get's capped since its the opera house of a specific place.
___________________
The Vernacular you're using. Where exactly is it from? It's my first time coming across them.
___________
You did splendidly on that front.
_______________
Gah! That sucks when IRL does stuff like that. I hope everything eventually settles down for you ^_^.
That's one of the cultural issues which hasn't really come up in my stories yet. I think that unicorns prefer matrimony--because of their historical 'noble lineage,' while the other tribes don't worry about it so much. Like naming conventions, the three tribes have been together long enough that there's some blurring of lines. In a small town like Ponyville, a lot of mares just hook up with a stallion whenever they want to have some fun or want to have a foal, and that's it. There's no stigma about bastard children to earth ponies, or other ponies who have lived in that culture long enough. Again, that's not to say that there aren't marriages and lifetime parings among Earth Ponies, just that a lot of them don't bother.
I'll take another look at it.
Alright, fair enough.
It's a Yorkshire, England accent. Largely inspired by James Harriot's books.
Well, the good news is that it's a pay increase (a rather substantial one, at that). The bad news is the increased responsibilities.
6401017
Didn't see this till today. Anywho, I hope things have gone well for you. I saw this youtube video and I automatically thought of this fic, and wanted to post it here.
6488016 That was a rhetorical question, and not really a comment on the meta; it just struck me as harsh of her to say, given that they'd just discussed the school's inadequate curriculum.. I could see breaking a harsh reality, but blaming her for something that wasn't her fault is only going to make an already-stressful situation even worse.
I suppose it's a credit to your writing that I'm irritated by a fictional character's behaviour in a way that doesn't break immersion, intentional or not—as far as I can tell, the thing with Luna was either a fluke or a product of earlier skills.
As for her mom, I was referring to the fact that she asked if Cherry was a stallion... Seconds after Ditzy specifically said she was a mare. Tribalism aside, that's masonwork territory.
6486814 Ah, sorry. I responded to your comments as I read through, didn't really expect for replies to be posted on different chapters.
6438479
Too cute!
1.bp.blogspot.com/-x3AxfyxuwJ0/TyMiQUqeKbI/AAAAAAAAczE/AgF907Xw51U/s1600/119708+-+artist+equestria-prevails+bed+derpy_hooves+silly_pony+sleeping.png
Since you linked it to me the other day or so, I finally got to it. It was a nice story so far.
Chapter 7 comment:
Umm, Ditzy already knew Carrot was Golden's brother. Back in chapter 1 when Berry gave her the piece of toast she was eyeing, telling Ditzy to eat it so she didn't turn out like Carrot, and then Golden says not to make fun of her brother, then Cherry chimed in, and Ditzy was paying attention since she said she was still eating the toast.
6777914
Thanks!
Gah, how did I screw that up? I'll have to fix it.
6779518 I'm surprised no one else noticed. Maybe they didn't read it all in one go.
That would be my guess. I fixed it in chapter one.
Do you think you might have a new chapter for this story soon?
7049194
Somewhat soon, but not sure how soon. I need to update OPP first, and then this.
Right now I'm just focusing on getting back in the groove of writing every day, hence Silver Glow's Journal. I used to, and back then updates were much more frequent. Then life took a tire iron to my kneecaps, and pretty soon I was writing less and less . . . anyhow, point is that I will be updating, but I don't know when.
I know you were busy with Silver Glow, and now you're working on OPP again. But I'm curious. It's been over a year. Are you ever coming back to this story?
8139098
Yes, although I don't know how soon. I've got three queued before it, and some major work I've got to do at home that needs to be done ASAP. The housework, I don't have a good timeline for, and that's gonna impact everything else, unfortunately.
8356159
I was referring to the tribalism and her cow comment.
8356159
Oh, gotcha. Well, she's thus far in the story gotten the same kind of cloud education that Derpy has, so. . . .
8368411
No idea, this is my first time making alcohol so I don't really know what i'm doing. We took it out of the fermenter and put it in a carboy to age. That's when it got in a heat wave. I do intend to freeze distill some into applejack if it turns out ok.
I just wasn't expecting immature teenager humor.
8368971
Yeah, be careful with that. You can get potentially dangerous concentrations of methanol with freeze distillation, depending on how high you jack it. I think that there are ways to deal with that, but I don't know offhand what they are.
Well, they are immature teenage ponies . . . .
8375515
got it. I'll keep that in mind. I'm not sure what i'll be able to get from a standard freezer though.
yeah, it's definitely the people, and like I said, my school supposedly does a good job of prepping for industry. But i'm still a little anxious about it.
8376649
I managed to freeze most of a bottle of Jack Daniel's once. Granted, that was a pretty amazing freezer. . . .
Hopefully, you'll do fine. Most of it is getting along with people, really, and also not being the biggest idiot. At least, that's been my experience.
8381920
To be fair, landscaping is only like 10% of water consumption in California. It accounts for a huge amount of water use on a household level, but crops (especially rice) take way more. But still, drought resistant landscaping would be big. Lawns tend to get replaced with hardscape, which cuts down on water use even more.
Transport isn't really a problem. There's a canal that runs the length of the state to transfer water. The bigger problem is storage, there isn't enough to sustain a long drought, or enough to contain a really wet winter (which happened in some areas this winter). Plus they just end restricions immediately. It's ok, droughts over no water restrictions. It'll take years to completely recover from the drought that just ended.
Southern California is pretty bad about conserving water and it creates some tension inside the state. They don't really see the same scarcity that Central and Northern California see (plus pretty much all the water they have comes from northern California)
8386494
yeah, we got a rainbow dash episode with a bunch of flashbacks to her racing. We also see Ditzy doing really well (and beating out Rainbow and the other wonderbolts), but as time goes on, her eyes get worse and worse, and so does her performance. Granted she was still placing and was on the same tier as the wonderbolts, but it was still really depressing.
So, I know it's probably not a priority right now, but any plans to continue this?
8382861
Yeah, it wouldn't solve everything, but 10% is a decent savings. Certainly better than 0%.
Huh, I didn't know that.
Yeah, I've been reading off and on about the problems they've been having with the Oroville dam, and how they were having to dump water because they got too much . . . reservoirs are handy as a buffer, but unless they're really huge, you can't put all the water in them when you've got a surplus.
Which is kind of dumb, in my mind. Maybe ease the restrictions a little bit, but keep conserving water until the reservoirs and aquifers are full again.
I should ask my brother some time what it's like by his house--he lives in San Diego.
8388771
Man, I really need to see that episode. Which one was it again?
8388788
Yes, once I get back caught up with other stuff. I don't know exactly how soon that will be, because I've got a couple of other high-priority projects in front of it at the moment.
8400179
True.
well, oroville is a little unique. It only serves the surrounding area (there's a lot of agriculture in the area) and doesn't feed into anything else (like that canal I mentioned), it also is only rain fed. No snow melts or other reservoirs. But the big problem with the oroville dam was that the spillway had been damaged for years and the emergency backup can't be shutoff and isn't meant for heavy use.
8400747
Yeah, I meant just in terms of how they wound up with more water than the reservoir could hold, and had to dump it down the damaged spillway. From what I know about that one (and I assume that there's lots more like it), the basic idea was that it fills up during the rainy season and then can be drawn down during dry seasons (and IIRC, they'd been running lower levels for years due to the drought).
I wonder if there's some practical way to refill the aquifers, or if it's just a case of having to wait for the water to percolate down naturally?
Okay, I did get a chance to watch it. I think you could either consider it a case of Derpy's failing vision causing her to drop from the top spot, or else just that as the other ponies got older, they got faster and she didn't . . . either way, that was a good background detail.
It's not the best plan, but it's the only one I've got.
8409585
yeah, that's how it works. It was running extremely low, there were concerns that it would completely empty.
I don't think there is.
I think it was her vision. Because they took the time to change the model. The rest just change facial expressions a bit.
8411285
The only thing I can think of is to somehow pump it in the ground like they do with fracking fluid. But I have no idea if that would actually work in an aquifer.
Yeah, I think so too. And that was really clever of them, because it's not something that's going to be obvious to a kid.
8413471
it was, it's nice to get little parts of her story in the background. plus there's this little shot from last season (maybe?)
i.ytimg.com/vi/XekiePddq18/maxresdefault.jpg
apparently it got bad enough to require surgery.
9249030
Good to know, I wasn't sure unborn unicorn foals were that resilient, but I guess the mother protects them.
9250333
I’d have to figure that they are. I mean, if not, you’d have to be really careful about mares working weather or even accidentally generating a static charge and then landing.
Actually, thinking of it, I wonder if fetuses are more or less effected by electric shock than the mother? From what I can tell, doing a brief bit of research, there aren’t any studies that say for sure but there’s anecdotal evidence that they might be.
9251047
I'd be surprised if they didn't make some concessions for pregnant mares to keep them from the more dangerous or strenuous work when they got further along. That's what we do after all.
Even so, can't really blame Lightning Bolt, she had no idea Derpy was pregnant.
Well, they're hecka less resistant to alcohol and blunt force trauma than a full grown human, I can tell you that much.
As for electricity it makes sense that a strong shock that goes through the mother can't be healthy for the baby either. On the other hand most small shocks won't get that far into the body. You usually just hurt your fingertips with static electricity.
9251444
I’d think that they would, although it might depend on the tribe. IRL horses, you’re not supposed to work them when they’re to a certain point--can’t remember exactly where. I could see earth ponies keeping on working right up until it’s time to deliver the foal.
Nope, not a clue.
Various other contaminants (for lack of a better word) as well--nicotine, lead, mercury, I’d assume certain types of radiation. . .
Yeah, I wouldn’t think it would be good for a baby. Like, my gut says it’s probably not good for a baby at all, and you’ve got to figure that the reason why they never tested Tasers on pregnant women was because they also figured it probably wasn’t going to have a good outcome. That does make me wonder if the defibrillator shock pads are a risk, too? I mean, I suppose it’s a lesser risk than the mother dying which is probably also going to be fatal to the kid, but I wonder if people who have had good training with them take special precautions with pregnant women and only use them as an absolute last resort?
9264977
Now I don't have any real medical training, so don't take my word for it, but from what I've heard it's supposed to be relatively safe. The shock is going to be mostly located in the chest. Not completely risk free but safe enough to be common practice. Either way the dreadful algebra says that if the choice is between letting both mother and child die and letting one of them live, then there really isn't a choice.
A taser is designed to paralyse the entire body, yes? Not to give a brief and localised shock like a defibrillator. It might be relatively safe, but manufacturer isn't going to test it on a pregnant woman even if the chances of miscarriage are very slim. The arguably good PR. of saying that you successfully tested a weapon on pregnant women and found it to be safe doesn't outweigh the potential negative impact of a failed test. Which some people would equate to murder. It's just easier and safer to write "This weapon is not intended for use against pregnant women." on the product rather than risk the wrath of political lobby organisations.
It might be a good idea to do the tests in the long run, but what company wants to be first to take that risk? Especially if they don't have to.
9285741
But it's not a possibility. At least not in canon Equestria. They're both mares, and gelding in Equestria isn't a thing.
If it was a thing, Big Mac would've done it ages ago, and with their magic (and how potions can both create and alter life), sex change would be a thing via potions and magic. But gelding isn't a thing, and Big Mac isn't a mare 24/7 (but deep in the closet most of the time).
9285748
We don’t know for sure it isn’t a thing, although to my mind it seems unlikely in the modern age, except perhaps for medical reasons. I could believe that if they’re mare-dominant--as the gender ratio in the show implies--that there could have been a time historically where they at least gelded problem stallions either as a way to keep them from being sex offenders or as a way to prevent them from having offspring if they’re not ‘worthy’ of it, or perhaps for other reasons (Celestia’s personal guard is all gelded stallions to avoid them wanting to have sex with her, for example). There are a number of historical examples from humanity of castration for different, non-medical purposes to make it believable to my mind that ponies could have chosen to do that for essentially the same reasons.
That’s obviously something that’s never ever going to come up in canon.
9265359
That’s what I was thinking. It’s more localized, more specific in what it does, and at the end of the day, if the mother dies, the baby probably also will, so it’s the least-worst option at that point.
I think that’s the general idea, yeah. At least render the person incapable of resisting without resorting to shooting them or otherwise inflicting physical violence. Like, not the best option, but a generally non-lethal one.
Well, yeah, and let’s be honest, that’s why a lot of drugs and such aren’t tested on pregnant women. Without having a really good idea what’s going to happen beforehand, there’s no upside to doing it, and only tons of negative press if it goes wrong. Sure, in a life-or-death situation, a doctor might have to make a choice he’d rather not, but at the same time, you can forgive a doctor for doing what seemed best at a moment of crisis. For testing purposes, though, you really can’t say that. “Well, we were curious to see if this kills babies, and I guess it does.” That’s never a good PR position for anybody. It’s much safer to just say ‘don’t do this,’ and if there are negative side effects, you can fall back on the statement.
Ultimately, what it’s going to come down to is pregnant women who are tased for whatever reason and what happens to their baby, and from there you’ll get a pretty good idea of what effect if any a taser has on a pregnant woman’s baby. I did a bit of googling on this topic and there’s at least one lawsuit I came across of a pregnant woman being tased and her baby not turning out right . . . can’t remember the exact details. Of course, in a case like that, it’s going to come down to who can make a more convincing case in court, since as far as I was able to determine, there’s no known research on the topic.
Anyway, to get back to the topic of the story (if I haven’t already . . . it’s been a while and I can’t remember
) pregnant pegasus mares are probably innately immune to lightning* and any potential effects it might have on unborn foals.
Which actually leads me further down the rabbit hole to the image of a pegasus foal sticking a fork in an electrical socket and that basically doing nothing except maybe making her coat stand on end.
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*As you may or may not know, there are two kinds of lightning. Negative lightning is the stuff that we are used to, and my headcanon is that pegasi are immune to it. Positive lightning is the stuff that comes from the top of some cumulonimbus clouds (anvil clouds; the king of clouds), and positive lightning makes negative lightning seem small and pathetic. It can travel for dozens of miles before hitting the ground--people have been killed by such lightning strikes when it was perfectly clear and cloudless where they were (a bolt from the blue) and at least one airplane has been brought down by it, even though airplanes are hardened against lightning strikes. Positive lightning, in my headcanon, can kill pegasi.
9291887
I meant in modern Equestria.
Sure in the past, there could have been any number of horrifying things (each as likely as unlikely).
But child murder (ala China with females), or castration of a majority of males (ala Feminazi heaven). I just don't see that being a thing. Rather I had wave the 1.85 to 1 canon gender split, as a simple case as it being their default gender split naturally (cause such differences in gender can happen in nature where a gender is born predominantly).
Idk; It feels contradictory to Equestria's culture, and how deeply rooted the tenents of the Element are to Equestrian Society. To have those things being a thing in modern times.
9291996
The 2 are not as far apart as you think:
China has tradition of eunuch-slaves (unlike occidental eunuch, who lose only their testicles, oriental eunuchs lose their testicles and penises). Since eunuchs start off as males, China has preference for males (if one wants a son, daughter, and eunuch-slave, one must start with 2 sons and a daughter). In China, female infanticide goes hand-in-hand with with castration and demasculinization. If China would seriously want to end female infanticide, it could greatly reduce the rate by giving fathers what they want:
China could start castrating and demasculinating fathers pursuing sexselective abortion and female-infanticide, and force them to be slaves for the rest of their lives, performing public works at the end of a whip for the states.
Father who murdered his baby-daughter:
"I want to have an eunuch-slave —— ¡not be 1!"
Chinese Government:
"Close enough. ¡Off with your cock and balls! ¡To the wall!"
Far fewer chinese fathers in China would persue sexselective abortion and female-infanticide if China would just start chopping off their cocks and balls and making them into slaves of the state:
¡I love ironic punishments!
9292222
Ummm ... you're kind of wrong. It has been 88 yrs. Since the last Eunuch in China. China doesn't have Eunuch slaves any more, and hasn't since it stopped being an autocracy. So past that "used to be a thing", you're all sorts of wrong.
Now in the USA there are half a million eunuchs, but that is either as a treatment for prostate cancer, or other medical procedures. Which is different than what you're going on about, and getting your balls cut off doesn't change what gender characteristics you take on. That requires hormone therapy. So getting castrated doesn't turn a man into a woman.
I mean look at these pics. Which one's are Eunuchs? *Hint: The answer isn't all of them*
upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/54/Domenico_Ghirlandaio_-_St_Jerome_in_his_study.jpg/260px-Domenico_Ghirlandaio_-_St_Jerome_in_his_study.jpg
qph.fs.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-e6377d5f0d6c0507cd37359918e26840
closetprofessor.files.wordpress.com/2015/05/img_1755.jpg
Those are some manly men. I mean look at the Santa Clause Beard on the first one. The second one is meh, but fit. And the third one has a more well defined abs than I or my brother will ever have (and my brother is a 4th degree black belt in TKD, and proficient in many other martial arts (has been doing it since 2002)).
So ... if being a Eunuch demasculinizes and makes men not men. Which one's are Eunuchs?