When things don't go the way we hoped for, it's easy for ones mind to become clouded with grief. It's times like these that all seems lost with no way of recovery. However, sometimes, the thing that one needs most is someone to talk to. Someone who will listen to your aching heart. When the invasion of Canterlot didn't go as Chrysalis had planned, she placed a heavy weight on her heart that nopony would ever be willing to lift, nopony, except Doughnut Joe, that is.

Blank Slate is the greatest thief of his generation. He has robbed countless nigh-impossible marks, and his talents as a master of disguise are beyond par - truly, nopony knows who he is.

And now he's preparing the greatest heist in mortal memory: the treasure vaults of the Princesses themselves.

But you have to get up pretty early in the morning to get one past the pony who defines when ‘early in the morning’ is…

Spoilers in the comments! Beware! Beware...

Audio Reading available - thank you ABagOVicodin
Czech Translation available - Thank you Keranis

The "what-if" sequel has arrived -- Equinophobia: Silvery Lies.

"Equinophobia is a psychological fear of horses"
Sometimes you're lucky, and sometimes you're unlucky. Ryan finds herself the latter as she ends up in a world of sunshine, rainbows, and pure horror.

A story of an out-of-place person learning to adapt to their new environment.

Alternate Universe tag for lack of or changes in Equestria Girls elements and the Crystal Empire's history.

Written as the A-side to A Chromatic Scale. The stories are not related otherwise and can be read separately.

Princess Celestia is in your bed, and you don't know why: what do?

Cute, funny, and short. Have fun reading!

Proofreading by RaylanKrios.
Now with audio reading by CaptainBron3y
Second audio reading by MeloncholyIguana.

Based on this story:
Princess Celestia is (still) in your Bed
Princess Celestia Has Stolen All Your Bed Sheets
Drunk CelestAI Is In Your Bed
Fimfic Authors Are In Your Bed
Princess Celestia is in Your Washing Machine

You are Ted, a human who has been trapped in Equestria for a while now. Under the advice of your pony friends, you've come along to join them in one of Pinkie's summer beach parties. While the ponies play their games, you were just planning on simply relaxing and enjoying the rays of the sun. But after watching the ponies play under sun in swimwear, some mixed emotions are brought out inside you. Have you been trapped so long in this world that you were starting to find your pony friends attractive?

Things get even more complicated for you when a pony you were not expecting showed up beside you. And she asks for a favor of you that you'd never thought you'd hear: help her put on her sunscreen.

But she's Princesses Celestia! The goddess of the sun! Why would a goddess like her need sunscreen?

Story inspired by the art of Tex. Lucky, lucky TexAnon.

A human finds himself in Equestria under very unpleasant circumstances with no explanation.
His reaction: get the heck out of Dodge and start a new life where Equestria and her ponies can't reach him.
But an alicorn's reach is long and the events which brought him here and his treatment in Canterlot are not so easily forgotten by those who did it. How does one say 'go away' to an immortal goddess?

Yay! Featured, thank you all.
A TV Tropes page
Revised 08/31/14 for clarity and grammatical issues, no events changed. I am working on a sequel, but it will be from Fancy's POV.
P.S. Green is NOT Lyra. There are other green unicorns.

Berry Dots is a quiet, but respected, stallion employed as an accountant at a small business. He causes no trouble, and is a kind and considerate neighbor.

He also harbors a dark secret.

Every day of his adult life, he has been fighting a monster he can't see, or taste, or touch. An evil that, if left unchecked, would ruin countless lives. A darkness that nopony else can ever know about.

Until last Thursday happened.

This is the first book of The Humanity Within Trilogy. Its sequel is What I've Done.

I wasn't always like this, a monster, running through the woods on an alien planet. I was once a man. I had dreams, a girlfriend, and a great job.
Then They came. In the middle of the night, They scooped me from my home, and... changed me.

Now I'm a beast, a demon the like of which the world I've become stranded on has never seen before, scraping by on the fringes of society, hiding from the natives, and doing my best to avoid notice.

After all, who could ever be friends with a monster?

Cover Image done by the very talented PaintSplotch! You can find his FimFic account here.
And here is his DeviantArt Account!
Now 100% approved by Twilight's Library!
Mad props to my prereaders:
ThatPonyWithASword.
Admiral Applejack.
JXWheeler

Limited Liability is a changeling with a very routine life. He works at a bank. He lives with a marefriend. He goes through every day making sure he isn't discovered.

At least, that is, until the day that the hive has planned to invade Canterlot. On that day, his love runs out, and his disguise fails. Trapped in public with a chitinous body for all of Equestria to see, Liability has to find a way not only to survive, but to avoid ruining an invasion years in the making. Along the way, he learns a very interesting lesson about the ponies around him.

Written for the Equestria Daily "Outside Insight" contest.

Cover Art by Ruirik.

On a warm, rainy afternoon, two young ponies take shelter in a gazebo. One is hoping to find a job at a bakery nearby, and just wants the rain to go away so she can make it to her interview. The other isn't really a pony, and just wants the rain to go away so he isn't caught.

Life tends to work that way, I suppose.

——————
Written for the Outside Insight Fanfiction Contest.
Featured 8-10-14!