• Member Since 30th Dec, 2018

get fucked retard


"I hOpE tHeY dOnT hAcK mY fImFiCtIoN!!!!!"

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RATED PG / PG-13 FANFICS 285 stories
Found 285 stories in 64ms

Total Words: 11,915,785
Estimated Reading: 4 weeks

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T

Twilight is desperate for love—and that desperation dooms her chances for it.

Hence The Love Protocols. Rules set in place to stop her feelings from making a mistake. Desperate enough to nearly date anyone, she needs the rules in place from getting with the wrong pony—or messing things up with the right one. 

Spike assures Twilight she's not so shallow and that, given dating experience, her tastes would narrow. Yet she requests his aid in finding love at a bar. 

How will our wingman fare in helping Twilight find somepony to love?

[Cover by Maren]


Commission for Barbarity!

Want a story for yourself? Then check out my commissions page!

Chapters (1)
T

At an inventors convention, intelligent tinker Doctor "Time Turner" Whooves and his kooky inventing partner Derpy unveil Derpy's latest unorthodox creation. Unfortunately, like Derpy, her wacky creation has some rather minor goofs that needs some improving...

"Side splittingly good! 10/10"
~ Faded Echoes

"A silly read."
~ Forgetful

WARNING:
The following story contains humor that some may find disturbingly hilarious. So, if you're not the appropriate age...

I won't tell if you won't. :derpytongue2:

Chapters (2)
T

This story takes place during the episode "imagination Manifestation"

The strange magenta dress Rarity magically placed on Rainbow Dash seemed to have some strange possession magic left over from the mysterious book Spike found. Not only does she now want to wear it the dress is making her act more like a fashion model and the longer she has it on the more her personality is changing. While Twilight is finding any way to help Rainbow Dash get back to normal Rarity is enjoying the new Rainbow Dash too much and this could be making things worse.

Cover Art: I don't know who made this the artist was from Bronycon last year

Chapters (2)
T

This story is from the 3rd episode of friendship is witchcraft and I've always thought of making a fanfict about it. But here is the feeling of being fluttershy during those stages of events.

Character Fluttershy and her dragon father belong to Sherclop pones on YouTube

Chapters (4)
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Daring Do cannot believe her luck when she is asked to help explore the most ancient tomb known to ponykind. But terrible danger awaits her, for beneath the earth rests something beyond equine understanding.

Warning: comments contain ending spoilers.

TVTropes page.
Alternate ending by Duplex Fields.
Archived in the Pony Fiction Vault.
Reviews:
One Man's Pony Ramblings
Louder Yay
PresentPerfect
The Royal Guard
Cleverpun's Critique Corner
The Goodfic Bin

Chapters (1)
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Life in Ponyville, outside of the usual events like a parasprite invasion or a revenge-seeking, all powerful megalomaniac kicking out the town librarian, tends to be laid back and typical. Which Applejack doesn't mind. However, after the CMC cause more problems due to influence from a newcomer in town, Applejack gathers the girls to go fix what the CMC did.

But then a mysterious creature ends up attacking Applejack, and while she survives and seems fine, it isn't long before she starts acting strangely. It's up to the usual group of ponies to figure out what's going on before it's too late.

[img]http://i.imgur.com/6MrWqNZ.png[/img]
*Approved for Twilight's Library on 3/18/14*

Also has a TVTropes page

Chapters (25)
T

This story is a sequel to Something Sweet To Bite


A gruesome holiday tale with a peppermint twist. In the ancient lands where the three pony tribes once lived the Windigo's magic has locked the weather in an eternal winter storm. Two little foals, who have lost their way, seek to find food and shelter in the deep dark woods. What they take for their only hope for survival may in fact spell their doom.
Meanwhile, it's the first official Hearth's Warming Eve in Canterlot, but something is wrong in the fledgling capital of Equestria. Can Starswirl the Bearded come up with a plan to set things right?
This candy coated horror will warm your heart and chill your spine.


Candymare Cover Art by kvernikovskiy

Chapters (6)
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This story is a sequel to Something Sweet To Bite


After the strange disappearance of everypony in Ponyville and half the population of Canterlot, the citizens of Equestria live in fear and uncertainty. A year passes and while Celestia tries to once again shoulder the responsibilities of the crown without her sister Luna by her side, the investigations into what happened and why have born little fruit. Rainbow Dash, the weather pony of the now ruined Ponyville, may be the key to discovering at last what happened to Luna, her friends, and her town. And perhaps what exactly it is the Candy Mare wants.


Candymare Cover Art by kvernikovskiy

Chapters (15)
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Most ponies assume that something is wrong with Ditzy Do's eyes. Theories range from a head injury to a genetic disorder to muscle damage behind her eye. The crueler folk suggest she's just retarded. Nicer ponies say it's just a party trick she never got tired of.

They're all wrong. They're all very, very wrong.

I discovered the truth one day in conversation with her. One eye would always look at me, and the other would wander. At least, I thought it was wandering. So while we were talking, I followed it. Goddess in heaven I wish I had not. Never follow the other eye. Ever. Because Ditzy Do's eyes work fine.

She's just watching something. That... thing that's always in the corner of our eyes. And if she looks at you with both eyes?

Goddess save you.

----

Preread by BrastaAAura17, Chase Cosmicwing and dreamingnoctis. Cover art also by dreamingnoctis. Guy's a bro.

Chapters (13)