• Member Since 11th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen 8 minutes ago

Jake The Army Guy

Be excellent to each other, and PARTY ON, DUDES! ~ Abraham Lincoln


A year ago, a portal opened, linking Equestria and Earth.

And then it began to grow.

The two worlds slowly began to merge. Thaumatic radiation, vital to ponies but deadly to humans, spread across Earth, as unstoppable as the tide. In a last ditch effort to save the human race, mankind worked with the ponies to create a serum that will "convert" humans into ponies, allowing them to survive in this new integrated world.

Now, upon the day of Integration, all of mankind has converted.

Except for one man.

Meet David, the last human, and hear his message.

Based on The Conversion Bureau: The First Year by Cloudhammer.

Cover art by aealacreatrananda, used without permission.

Featured on Equestria Daily!

Now with reading by Forrest M!

Chapters (3)

Alcohol. The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.

Sometimes people indulge.

Sometimes people overindulge.

Sometimes people get shit-faced whammered and write about cartoon horses in relationships.

Join us as Captain Unstoppable abuses his liver and writes some OTP for you and me, along with some side-pairings that we like. A series of prompts I gave him while he was drunk as a skunk. Written by him, polished up by me. Will update the next time Cap gets into the Angry Orchard.

Chapters (11)

Rainbow Dash's life is pretty sweet right now. She's a full-fledged Wonderbolt, she has a hot coltfriend, and all the fame, fortune, and glory that she could dream of. Yes, Dash is living the dream, all thanks to her being the most awesome mare in Equestria.

However, while on a date with said hot coltfriend, Rainbow Dash learns that there are drawbacks to being so awesome.

My part of a shipping trade between myself and The Fantabulous Mr. Lemur. Eternal thanks go to Marshal Twilight, Captain Unstoppable, and Bad_Seed_72, whose help made this possible.

Cover art graciously done by the insanely awesome KarmaDash!

Chapters (1)

Left home alone after being grounded for mouthing off to Miss Cheerilee, Button Mash goes snooping through his Dad's closet. He finds a box of relics from his Dad's past, including a few vinyl records from some odd-sounding bands that turn out to be just the thing to incite a bit of preteen rebellion.

Trigger Warning: very little plot, lack of coherency, and multiple heavy metal horse puns. Anyone not familiar with old-school thrash metal should slap themselves. Hard.

Thanks to Seether00 for his help with edits, themaskedferret for help with the motivation, and Captain Unstoppable for being awesome.

Covert art belongs to Flutterthrash on Deviant Art.

Chapters (1)

Captain Fleethoof of Team Skyfall has come around to who he should truly be with. But as he goes to confess his love, an old friend seems to have beaten him to the punch! Can the Captain defeat the Special Agent in the battle for the bat pony maiden's heart?

Written in one sitting at hour 27 of a 29 hour shift.
Don't judge me.
I regret nothing.
Shots fired.
Your move, creep...

Chapters (1)

This story is a sequel to Under A Luminous Sky

Manehatten: The City of A Thousand Lights. A place where beings from all corners of the globe live and work together.

But even the brightest light casts shadow.

Bodies have started to turn up: broken, beaten, savaged. When the local police turn to Canterlot's Royal Investigative Service for aid, they set off a chain of events that could rock the metropolis to its core.

A mysterious investigator; a disgraced magician; a desperate detective; an idealistic journalist. Together, they must stop the bloodshed, but at what cost?

Evil, like beauty, is often in the eye of the beholder.

Sequel to Under A Luminous Sky, but can be read as a standalone story.

Chapters (3)

The longest walk she'll ever take.

Chapters (4)

This story is a sequel to Under A Luminous Sky

In the wake of the Mbwun killings , Spike seems to be better off then he was before: his large, muscled body is a far cry from the chubby baby he was, and he no longer has to go through his hundred-year wyrm sleep. Life, however, is rarely so simple. As he and Twilight move back to Canterlot, Spike finds that his new body may very well mean the end of his old life.

Sequel/side story to Under A Luminous Sky. You don't HAVE to read it, but it would help.

Chapters (9)

Ponyville is shaken to its core when a body is discovered in the Everfree Forest. As the townsponies grieve, the mysterious Special Agent Bentgrass, from Their Majesties' Royal Investigative Service, arrives at the Books and Branches library and drags Twilight into a world she's only read about: lies, corruption, suspicion, and murder.

Faced with an indifferent police force, and Agent Bentgrass's infuriating methods, Twilight must put the pieces together and catch the killer. But as blood continues to spill and questions pile up, one thing is terrifyingly clear: in the dark of the Everfree, much more is at play than mere murder.

Chapters (18)
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