• Published 24th Oct 2012
  • 1,706 Views, 206 Comments

Absolution - BlackRoseRaven

A pony begins a journey to find his parents, lost heroes who vanished years ago.

  • ...

Allonym's Postscript

The Draconequus sighed softly as he closed the book and quietly slipped it up into the shelf above, before reaching up and slowly rubbing at his forehead. His suit jacket hung off the back of the chair he was sitting in, and his cane was nearby, left leaning against a shelf... but he didn't need it anymore. It was an amplifier for his powers... he needed his cane, his rings, his prayer beads, his notebook, all of those things for his abilities to work. Abilities that were no longer necessary.

“And I need the hat to look cool.” Allonym murmured quietly, reaching up and touching his head... then he glanced up before looking around the hovel he lived in, and smiling at the sight of the fedora on the hat rack. He pushed himself away from the desk... then grasped his stomach and closed his eyes tightly before smiling faintly, whispering: “Damn.”

He shook his head out, the Draconequus breathing slowly before he carefully straightened and gazed silently around his one-room home. His beaten writing desk, a messy futon where he slept, little more than a nest of old blankets and pillows, cases of cola and energy drinks piled up next to a beaten-up little fridge filled with more of them. Shelves lined the walls, all of these filled with books: history books, fantasy books, and unsurprisingly, plenty of comic books. The Draconequus smiled faintly as he strode carefully across the room, dragging one leg slightly behind himself as he looked over his possessions: there were plenty of loose papers, too, doodles, and notebooks, and binders, and just random knickknacks here and there as well. He was a pack-rat, but... he supposed that was in his nature.

Allonym grunted and stumbled a bit as he strode towards the back door, half-falling forwards, and his prayer beads jangled quietly around his neck, reminding him of where they were. The Draconequus reached up, squeezing them silently through his shirt as he breathing became more labored, and then he straightened and looked silently towards the back door, past the smiling portraits on the wall, the framed letters, the faded mementos of what was gone...

He smacked his temple a few times with the butt of his palm as there was a whistling in his ears, the sound of a train, the scream of metal on metal, and then he shook his head hurriedly out before squeezing his prayer beads compulsively through his shirt again. Then slowly, carefully, he made his way forwards as he whispered: “Writers are very unimportant in the long run, you see. It's the characters who make the story... who tell the story. We writers... we get so arrogant, thinking that... even when we come up with an original idea, it belongs to us... it doesn't. It belongs to the story. It belongs to the characters we make experience it, and dance to our whims... except, oh ho, sometimes they have their revenge, don't they? We get so attached to certain ideas, certain concepts, they become real and tangible to us, and we become willing to give up anything... anything... to see them last just a little longer...”

Allonym silently pushed through the door, then he smiled faintly as he let it swing closed behind him before leaning back against the old wood, gazing silently out past the trees and over the crystalline, gorgeous lake in the distance. It was beautiful here, his own personal little paradise. It was something he wished he'd been able to share... with someone special.

He quietly stumbled forwards, striding a little down a cobblestone path, past a single tall tree... and then he smiled faintly as he looked down, reaching a small, pretty slope. Roses, so dark and deep they looked black, grew wild here, in a natural wreath that surrounded a polished slate tombstone. A bouquet of the same flowers rested in front of the grave, and Allonym calmly sat down beside it as he leaned one arm companionably overtop it, smiling faintly as he whispered: “Hey, you.”

He halted, looking up into the beautiful sky above: the sun was beginning to set, and he thought he could see the faintest sight of stars twinkling in the firmament beyond the clouds, his eyes studying the constellations as he said quietly: “So I finally finished recording that silly story. About the ponies, yes. I know, it's silly. But hey, I've always been a little silly, huh?”

Allonym smiled over at the grave, then he shrugged a bit as he shifted, wincing and rubbing at his stomach before he flinched a little as gray visibly spread up from beneath his collar, and then he murmured softly as his eyes flicked back to the grave: “Hey now, don't worry about me. I think of it as... I'm on my way to come looking for you, you know? It was worth it, because... no one will ever know what these ponies were like. How in their stories, I saw a little of you and me...” He closed his eyes. “No, I saw a lot of you in her. You were always my hero.”

Allonym quieted, then he smiled softly as he rested against the tombstone, letting one arm fall across his lap; and slowly, gray spread down his ivory-scaled fingers, became first immobile, then petrified completely. It spread further, as Allonym whispered: “I'm just an Avatar, halfway between one world and another, half made of lies, half made of truths... and who knows which is which? So this is a fair sacrifice. My life, for hers. She's only a written character but so what? So am I. So are we all, even the readers are just... just the characters in someone else's story, and I wonder if they realize that? But all of us... we do get choices in life, to forge our own path. To break our given texts, to speak a new dialogue, to... to do something, anything, differently. And I have now... I've saved them.”

He trembled a bit, but he smiled warmly, radiantly, making his features look younger as his mismatched green and chestnut eyes gazed silently down over the grave. “I saved that little shard of you, even though I couldn't save you all those years ago. I can be happy, knowing that... that is a worthy sacrifice, especially of a... a worthless, blotted, badly-formed pseudo-character like myself.”

He laughed, then shook his head slowly and smiled faintly, closing his eyes and whispering as the gray spread over his features, as his arm petrified in place over the top of the tombstone: “I love you. I'm... I'm just going to put my head down for a minute, and then we'll watch the sunset together like old times, and we'll laugh, and we'll dance like we used to dance in your apartment... we'll do all the things we used to... but... I just need to put my head down for a moment...”

Allonym shifted as best he could, silently curling over the tombstone, head lowering to the arm curled overtop it. As he did, his features became gray stone, lost some of their detail, but in the smoothness could be seen serenity... in the expression that remained, a tender smile, a quiet joy. In the way he rested calmly, there was the knowledge that even as he went to sleep, a thousand thousand stories would continue on, the same as they ever had, undaunted by the changing of times, the rise or fall of society, the very shift of the planets and the moon and sun. Not the sky, not Heaven, not Hell, not all the cosmos nor all that which lay beyond had any sway over what stories would be told, how they would continue, and when they would end... not even the writer's pen could determine that. Only the characters and players, who acted out their roles, never understanding until the last moment how important they were to the universe around them; how all are players upon the stage, but a stage is nothing but a hollow without players to fill it.

Silently, a raven fluttered down and landed atop the shoulder of the now-statue of Allonym. A single black rose was in its beak, and it looked back and forth, eyes gleaming before it dropped the flower, letting it roll down the slope of the statue to fall into the upturned hand frozen in its lap, as if in blessing, like an omen of peace. Like a sign that he could sleep, and the world would continue to move on without him.

The raven leapt to the air and flew away, leaving the black rose behind, gently gripped in the hand of a lover who sat with his beloved, refusing to be parted even in death. And above, the sun set, the night came on, the stars shone and the moon blessed the earth, and still, the stories always, always continued on.

Cherish what you love, while it is here;
Cherish what you love, even more when it is gone;
Cherish what you love, and never be ashamed of it;
Cherish what you love.

August 24th, 2012 – October 3rd, 2012

Comments ( 55 )


Well I could say it ended on a happy note, but with you it's also an ambivalence...

While reading these last few chapters I couldn't stop the tears coming from my eye. That's right, I said eye. My left was dry yet my right was watering the entire time...
I think you finally broke me, but I don't care because of how fascinatingly dark and beautiful that was.

i don't think I'll ever be able to read anything that good ever again. :applecry:

-Good job :twilightsmile:


I think it was... balanced. I think Allonym was happy, at the end. But. I don't really know much at all, really. I just do what the hands tell me to do.


Thank you, honestly. I'm glad to have made an impact, and I'm glad the story was so... strong, and enjoyable, by the end. Absolution's ended up being given more praise than I expected, and I'm really honored by it.


Thank you very kindly. I just kind of... hoped for the best. It was really weird writing this, but I can't really say no to what my hands want me to write and... I'm glad I did. I really appreciate hearin' it was so good. And as to being featured, well. I've never been very good at getting noticed. I'm just honored and happy for the readers I do have.


That is probably the best description of Cancer there is, actually.


Thanks very much. I'm really glad to hear that, since... this really was a rather tough chapter to tackle, and it's good to hear that it all ended up having such an impact. It really does mean a lot to hear that my stuff is enjoyable, since... I do tend to go off into the crazy now and then, and I'm just really happy to hear when I manage to get something right. I'm glad to hear that it's all continuin' to prove a good read.

As always Rose you've written another amazing story.

I did not expect the twist with allonym either and pulled on a lot of heart strings reading this chapter. I'm not going to lie the characterisation of Luna and scrivvy annoyed me the last couple of chapters. But that's coz their personality was so much different to what we've grown to know and love.

I just have one question, do you plan your plots or does it sprout as you write it?


Thanks very much, I'm very glad to hear it proved a worthy read. It was kind of a weird story to write, with the. Singing psychopath and focusing around Antares, and the Emissary, Allonym.
But uh... it's... kind of a mix of both. I generally know a few of the bigger events that are going to happen during the story's timeframe, and I sometimes know how things are going to end. Otherwise, I just trust in my hands and let them write as they will. They know the story, and they'll write it out as they please, and that seems to be the way things work best.
Thanks again for reading. It's much appreciated, and I'm glad you found it to be a good story all-in-all. I hope you continue to enjoy my writing, since there's still more to come yet.


Corruption reacts pretty oddly to Antares, actually. It's because Scrivener didn't fully "change" until after Antares was born. His lack of magic is a mix of Luna not being very naturally-talented with most kinds of magic, and how Antares never really put a lot of emphasis into that part of his training.


Yeah, this story in particular has a tendency to do that. It's uh. A little rough.


You certainly don't have to feel obligated to. I do definitely appreciate it all the same, although I'll probably use your trick you mentioned to scan through the stories once or twice

Two weeks late on this one. Already a portion through Synthesis of an Atheist! Reflecting on this though, I was sad to see Allonym go. But nothing comes without a price. Man oh man, I still can't get over how Prestige died! That's ground my gears more than anything else in the Saga I think :applecry:


Glad to hear you're still reading and enjoying, and making good progress too, it sounds like. And yes, that scene. But. It was important, and it was part of the story, much as I'd like to have not had that whole. Thing happen.
Thanks very much, though. I hope you continue to enjoy the series, since. Well. Three stories, but still a whole lot left and some crazy places to go.

I loved this arc, just like all the others.

The part near the end, when L,S, and even C are 'free' shall we say and treating Ant like a foal. L even visibly desiring A in an impure way...

You captured the horror of it all so well, 'I' was horrified!


(Loved how NM came to the rescue)


Thanks very much. I really wanted to try and get that feeling across, and I'm glad that it all came out so clearly. Forced babyfication is one of the things that scares me a hell of a lot, so. I'm happy to know that translated so well.


That is pretty much how everyone feels about Prestige at this point, yes. She's uh. She's pretty awful. But thank you very much. I'm glad you're enjoying the stories and I hope you continue to until the end, since there's still quite a bit to go yet. I much appreciate the fave of Absolution as well.


Oh my crap.
Why did I never think of that joke.
That is fantastic.


Yeah, Absolution is. Pretty rough. Antares is kind of a lameass at times, but he uh. Goes through quite a lot for a kid. All the kids do, really.
And oh yes. Prestige was horrible beyond horrible. But that's admittedly part of what made things as they developed so fun.
"Fun" is the right word I'm looking for here, right?


Cancer was a dick move from my muse.
I mean, he sings. He sings. Why does he have to sing?
This is why I always say I can't control what I write. I just write.

Wow, think that's a record. A reply on a 91-week-old message.

I will say that you did a superb job on his songs, and all the other songs and poems in the series too. You definitely know how to elicit whatever reaction you want from your readers, which is probably the most valuable writing skill to have.

And yeah, Antares is a bit pathetic in this, but he very quickly became one of my favorite characters later on. Still not as cool as Pinkamena or a lot of others, but really likeable


The Void is... complicated. I will get into it more later on, but even though it's the 'end' of the universe, so to speak, it's also sort of a universe unto itself.


Thank you. I really was worried about the songs and stuff since... I don't usually write all this kind of stuff. For a lot of Cancer's songs, though, I can still hear a tune in my head whenever I read them, and I think that kind of helps in its eerie way.
And. Yes. They're such a weird family. I always really enjoyed doing the scenes where people were... just talking and interacting. It holds a strange fascination for me.
Slap's story focuses pretty much exclusively on him and Blueblood. The most romance you get is the awkward implied Frodo-Samwise relationship between them. But you can't do a Lord of the Rings parody without plenty of implied homosexual themes.


Thanks. I didn't expect Scutum to actually end up being involved again, but he kind of weaved his way back into the story. He's a good balancer for a lot of my other characters, I find.
And I actually did write that shanty myself. I can totally write happy things when I want to. Well, okay, this one is unusual for me, but I'm familiar with that whole chanting music thing, so it wasn't too hard to replicate the style. What I always have the most trouble with is finding decent rhymes.


This story was supposed to be... you know. Antares' coming of age, saving his parents, doing great things. Hope, and happiness.
And then, the whole. Cancer thing. And the whole. Prestige thing. And. The infantilism thing. And the Allonym thing. Damn that Allonym thing.
But at the same time, I guess I'm glad that it all happened the way it did, because of what it leads to later on. I think... faith should be rewarded some times. And since you people are crazy enough to still have faith in me and read my stuff after all I've put you through, I like to try and ensure that somehow, all of it kind of... works out, one way or another. Or rather, I just keep following what I'm told to write by my muse until eventually we get some kind of... closure, at least.
You know. Until I write another story.

This freaking story man
It got all sorts of messed up there at the end, and I wouldn't have it any other way
I still think you are one of my top five favorite writers

Anyway, I kindof want to have some kind of explanation for Allonym, but that would probably just ruin everything, you know? I'm sure one of the main things about his characterization is nobody really knows what is going on with him, so it's probably best to just be confused, right?

Anyway, on to what is probably my favorite stories out of this series


Thank you very much. And thanks for faving this as well. It really means a lot to hear that sort of thing from people because I honestly just. Meander along and hope for the best.
And I know what you mean. Let me put it this way, though: Allonym is exactly what you think he is. All the parts you think are true, are true. All the parts you think are lies, are lies. He is precisely what you think he is.
And you know, Synthesis is actually one of my favorites, too, no matter how much people flail at me over it. Although then again, maybe that's part of why I enjoy it so much, sadomasochist that I am.

It all worked out pretty well, even though Glory Be got a little rough
If I had to pick the overall emotion I felt with that, it would be despair. BLCA was horror, Synthesis was probably frustration, and Absolution was just way too much of a roller coaster to just pick one. Maybe just a big old screw you. That's an emotion, right?

You can't always have happy endings though. Sometimes a sad, tragic, or ending is more satisfying in the long run, as long as there is some kind of closure. You've always been really good at that, especially in Starlit Knights and BLCA.

I probably shouldn't compliment you any more; who knows what you might do to us next


When dealing with me, screw you is the predominant emotion most people feel, yes. This applies as much in person as it does in stories.
And thanks. I know that very well, yeah. But I always want these pony stories to have... something. Hope, I suppose. And the knowledge that no matter what happens, things will... continue, forever. The worlds will always be turning.
But uh. I actually burnt myself horribly out trying to force-start Hecate's Orphanage. I've been forced to shelf that project for the moment, and instead I wasted an entire day playing through Bioshock Infinite. And instead, now I'm going to switch to a different project. A "short" story that is nameless so far, but will involve a certain psychotic pony named Datura.
It should be fun.


I'm actually quite looking forwards to seeing what you think of her by the end of the story. Absolution is definitely a story of... growing up, so to speak.


We will meet some very good characters in Absolution. Some truly wonderful ones that will stay with us for the remainder of this journey. But there are also some very, very bad things that will raise their heads, too, and leave their own scars on the storyline. It should at least make for quite an interesting read.


Rustproof is like a giant, yes. Not quite Slap-sized, but. He's way bigger than any pony his age should be. Antares, meanwhile, is almost as tall as Rusty, but not nearly as wide. He's got a much lither, more-athletic build. They both look like full-grown stallions, not teens. Well. A teen and a kid, really.


I really don't. But honestly, I agree with you. He is by far the worst villain in the series. There have been and will be others who are stronger and even more dangerous than him, but... this particular antagonist leaves some terrible scars.


Way later on in the series, he's going to tell more poems. And they'll be even better.


That was a silly error on my part. And well, Cancer is tricky because he's chaos, and chaos is unpredictable and all, after all. He does have a few new tricks up his sleeve, though, and there's some... interesting things coming yet, yeah.
I love this dutch word and I will be doing my best to remember it and work it into conversation whenever possible. Also I appreciate when you can spot the little errors like that. It's very helpful.
And this is a uh... very interesting one, yes. I hope it proves enjoyable to read about, since the two are... rather interesting together. And admittedly Pinkamena and Slap are a favorite of mine. I consider them one of my best power couples, really. But I just kind of... let the characters decide things for themselves. They kind of naturally tangle themselves together that way, and it results in some... interesting and... I honestly think more real relationships, even though those aren't always the most fun to read about because every now and then they result in awkwardness or arguments or silliness that isn't as fun to read about. But it's important to me to let the characters live their own lives, even if. Their lives end up a little crazy now and then.


The pleasure's all mine. It's an honor to know these stories can help anyone with anything, really. Although sometimes the ponies do end up being... pretty smart. Which is great, considering I need to follow their advice more often myself.


It admittedly was in a few ways, yes. Antares kind of ended up with a bit of the sharp end of the stick for his story. But uh. Lots still to go in the story and better and worse things yet to come, so I hope you enjoy the way the journey has yet to continue. There's a few interesting twists and turns yet.

You know... Prestige going the way she did nigh immediately after Rusty did... It hurt, it really did. Regardless, uh... very fun story, very sad story... very... everything really, the roller coaster was real. Every second of interaction between Antares and Prestige was adorable, you know, after they stopped completely hating each other, and until Prestige was ambushed outside of the shower. (I was already paranoid of people trying to break in while I'm showering, now I'm terrified) F'naa, I'm going to miss Prestige, but the story goes onwards.

Overall, Antares learned some things about life... Guess that's all we can ever say. That no matter how bleak it got, we never gave in, and our torch only burns brighter in the dark because of it. (Something I've had to tell myself more than once on many occasions.)

I actually read most of the side stories before Synthesis of the Atheist when they were released on here (around the time I started following you is when you started posting those). So I guess I'll really quickly knock out the last few chapters I was sitting on of The Rhythm of the Dance and jump right into SotA.


Yeah. This story hit a lot of chords. A lot of highs, and a lot of lows. Antares was pretty heavily punished, and... he's a weird kid now, but this is important for shaping and defining who he will eventually become. He just has a lot of growing up to do, yet, although he certainly did a lot over the course of this story.
And uh. Rhythm of the Dance... well, you'll get a glimpse, actually, of someone who will be popping in way later if you finish those chapters up now. So I'm not sure if I should tell you to wait until afterwards or not. Still, though, there aren't too many spoilers, I did my best to make sure of that, since the whole... chronology ended up changing around on me.


That all means a lot to hear. To know the impact I've made, especially with a story that... yes, does have a lot of cruel pitfalls, especially for someone as young as Antares and the rest of his friends are. And especially with a character who started off very... ignorant, and almost cruel. But this is all a story about growing up and... she was able to grow up, along with everyone else. The endings hurt, but the journey always goes on, and there's still quite a long ways to go before we get there... and still many stumbles along the way.
But thank you. It's very touching, all of it, and means the world to me to know the story has moved you so much. As to your question, I would normally throw out a lame joke or a jab at myself, but... to be honest, it was very hard. It wasn't something I wanted to do, and I don't think a lot of people always understand that I don't necessarily write what I want. I write what the characters do, I'm just... recording them, more than I'm writing a story. She grew up so much, came so far, and to see it all blasted was... hard, even though this wasn't the first time in this series it's happened, and it certainly won't be the last. So it was hard, and it was saddening, and it brought up a lot of personal memories that I perhaps tapped too deeply into at the time.
But as they say, the show must go on.

I...think I'll need a while to process this story. A few years should do.

Good show, though. :trollestia:


Yeah, it uh... hits pretty hard in some soft areas, admittedly. But thank you, I'm glad that it had a lot of impact. I much appreciate the fave of it as well, and I hope you continue to enjoy my stories.


Yeah. This story is going to get. Messy, right here at the end. I mean, it was bad before but... well, there's one of the most psychologically-horrifying scenes in the whole story coming up. There's a lot pushed into these last few chapters, and I hope that it just ends up being... well, as enjoyable as the descent can be.

I really feel like I should be ashamed to have read this last chapter, like... I broke the lock on a diary or something just to read this specific part, you know?

So... this is the closest we will ever get to an author description?

Lastly, and this is only because I read WWDB first... I think I'm starting to get an idea for why you wrote these stories, at least for some part. I may be completely of the mark with this, but it seems that, at one point, these stories acted as a method to... mourn. Like... Luna was a represation of a very important person to you (and so is finally an explanation for the whole Datura's coma-Luna conversation in WWDB). I... don't really want to dig any deeper, I still respect the "lines", so to speak, but it's... intriguining? Ehrm, no, that's badly phrased... More like, I don't want to know more, but at the same time I still have that curiosity.
If you would like me to delete this part of the comment, I wouldn't object to it. I just had to... let these thoughts out at least once.


I sort of touch on that way later on, why they were able to save those two. It was a "warm death," so to speak: because of the Clay of Prometheus, their spirits were still trapped inside their own bodies.
Not. Much of a spoiler, really, but what the hell.
And well, there's no need to feel ashamed. It's a story I've chosen to share with the world, after all, and there are bits and pieces here and there that are true and that are false. It's a way of working through a lot of things, and... well, I wouldn't quite say a 'letting go.' More like a celebration. I'm not very good at letting go.
But thanks. For reading, for faving, for commenting, it's all appreciated more than I can say. I hope you continue to enjoy the stories, since. Well, there's still a lot more to come.

Through these last few chapters all I've been thinking was no. No he can't do that, he's not that crule! I'm still sad but I'm happy at the same time. Good job mate, good job.


Antares really does have a lot thrown at him for a kid, admittedly. But thank you. I much appreciate the faves, and the continued reading. I'm glad it's still an enjoyable tale, since. Well, there's quite a lot to go from here.

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