PKAnon
Joined 25th Mar, 2024 ·
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>it's come out in prose
files.catbox.moe/vf423b.jpg
This is really good so far!
Good to see it on here! Gonna read this top shelf shit RIGHT NOW.
Who thumbs-downs stories like these so fast lmao
>Manehattan and its consequences
have been a disaster for the equine race
11877055
There's a bunch of people on here who are salty about prose versions of greentexts and other Anon fics taking over the front page.
Looking Good!
11877276
Yeesh! Nothing at all wrong with either of those things. Personally I've yet to have any problems with greentext converted stories. It's the straight greentext format stories I have a somewhat irrational dislike for, though I wouldn't downvote stories for that. Never understood people who downvote the kind of subjects/formats they don't like, especially when these things are right upfront in the tags or descriptions.
Off to a good start with this story. I'll be following it.
I can't wait for more!
This is really well written! Also the pacing is great.
I can't pinpoint exactly why, but I'm loving the way this is written.
Maybe it's just the abundance of fics that are practically impossible to read, but who knows.
Either way, this first chapter is pretty interesting. I'm gonna read the next, and probably keep up with any updates.
... I'm going to save this story. The world building, the poetic place setting and verbose expression of various emotions makes this an absolute treasure. Thank you for posting in FIM.
These two need a space.
No clue if I'm trippin or not, but I think it should be "...?" and not "..?"
Another good chapter lol, looking forward to the next one.
Also he did, indeed, arrive.
...or did he?
Interesting. Starting out after he has beer around for a while.
Nice
Yeah, this is great. I'll be following this story, it's really well-written! Keep it up, author!
I love how this story is going! Just don't wear yourself out, alright?
A very comfy start
this guy needs to go to the lotus salon he's too tense I just hope he gets the happy ending.
Yeah, one of my favorite on-going fics currently.
And it was! This was a very delightfully heartening last could if chapters.
The emotion really comes through.
I haven't read the green, so I'll wait for you to translate into prose.
To bad it's going to go bad soon.
But that's the way stories go to actually have a story.
So good!
Now we’re getting somewhere!
Oh good, he told somebody where he's going.
A bit of advice, when writing a second person story, never change the second person narrative to someone else. Not only are none of your readers purple unicorn mares, but we also aren't multiple people.
If you're going to shift perspective to another person, I recommend using third for them.
Anyway, despite that, I'm really enjoying this so far.
Can't wait to see more of this story!
Well this story jumped in a direction I wasn't expecting. God job so far!
11881794
Fair play, I can see how that might get confusing. My reasoning for writing her perspective that way is that since Twilight is one of two protagonists, we should see through her eyes half of the time, much like how a more traditional novel might handle a case of multiple viewpoints. I definitely get where you're coming from, though - no hooves or horn to speak of for me, either.
Thanks for the feedback! It's greatly appreciated
You made a really catchy anon! I already like the guy!
Pinkie be like
Good,
KEEP THIS UP, PLEASE. This is very fun to read, hopefully it has been fun to write as well!
There were some >greentext stuff that you've forgotten to take out tho, in the past chapters, but that's fine since the quality on everything else is pretty good.
11882975
ah nuts. thanks for pointing that out, i'll give it another passthrough when i get off of work!
And I'm glad you're enjoying the story. Don't worry - it's been incredibly fun to write
Certainly an interesting start
11882351
Little idea maybe add when the PoV changes this:
Twilight PoV
Anon PoV
So it might be less confusing :D
Btw. Good story so far (currently at chapter 10)
Great chapters so far , can't wait to find out what ambrosia and the mecca is all about. Imo it'd be pretty cool to have pal and hearth join him and have adventures as he progresses back towards equestria kinda like the fimfic bad Mondays where it had a similarly interesting concept about half in.
Jail break! Get away before you get tagged!
It really is. I second that recommendation!
- MLP: FiM
- Romance
- Dark
- Adventure
A Human raised in Equestria by Pegasi. Oh, and he has their inherent magic. Have fun!11889585
Funnily enough, Bright Horizon was a name that I just thought up on the spot for the author of an untitled book, but now it seems like I've got another story to read through