Nightmare Moon comes back to Equestria after 1,000 years, just to be imprisoned again under the pretext of “Tax Evasion.”
I just wanna know, HOW do you pay taxes on the moon????
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- Member Since 22nd Jul, 2023
- offline last seen Yesterday
dart157
The self-proclaimed “Nightmare Moon guy”
dart157
Joined 22nd Jul, 2023 ·
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LMAO
THE SAUL GOODMAN CAMEO
Heisenberg was first a shape-shifting super-robot from the future in Phantom 2040...
And before that Heisenberg was an undead cat.
11726843
Yeah, that part was the main punch line of the entire story. Having NMM hire Saul to help her out of 1,000 years of tax evasion sounded WAY too good.
I was too tempted to include the “Did you know you have rights?” bit from Saul’s commercial in BCS, but decided against it since it’s likely copyrighted.
She's royalty. She's where taxes go (to die, if you want to insult the concept). There's also the fact that if you haven't done anything that affects a country at all then they won't charge you taxes. These are the reasons Mystic Sunrise is facehoofing at you.
EDIT: The essence of the joke can be preserved by having one of the Pillars try to fill out their tax returns. One for every year they spent in Limbo.
11726865
And of course before all of that he was a scientist who discovered that some knowledge was mutually exclusive.
"My client wins because fuck you, alicorn princess."
"Case dismissed. On another note, what happened to that sadist paedophile you were supposed to defend?"
"I ate him."
11726865
Taxes are by no means an issue in Equestria
The concept was attempted in the post windigo society before, but that was also the birth of the pinata when the unicorn and his bully colt pegasus were roundly strung up and had the greedy ass hat beaten out of them.
11726916
If that's a song, then yes. You can't include lyrics from non-MLP songs in a story. Never watched BCS, so I don't know if it is or not.
Pat of me is scared to wonder how much Nightmare Moon would have owed if she was successfully changed for tax evasion. I mean 1,000 years worth of unpaid taxes plus any penalties on top of it...ouch.
What a crossover
Related:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2020/10/16/2467776.png
Source.
11727103
It’s not a song but it is a part of the show. Figured that I probably shouldn’t include it, just to be safe.
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Eh, it’s a joke story anyway. Don’t wanna deal with facts and logic!
11727184
Huh? Why does it say you replied to me?
11727185
Was trying to reply to a different person, and I accidentally hit the reply button. Doing this all on my phone lol.
A good lawyer is worth every penny
Wow, what an excellent attorney! I am curious to see what happens next with this "Heisenberg" character.
11727090 Only GRIFFONS pay taxes!
Dang beakies...
REALLY good one-shot. Of course, Nightmare should consider herself lucky. Even the Joker isn't willing to take on the I.R.S., and HE makes the Justice League look like just a bunch of super-schlubs. Of course, Mystery Incorporated has a better track record against the Joker than pretty much anybody who is NOT a member of the Bat-Family, but that's another matter.
But anyway, really good work on the humor and wrap-up in this AU one-shot.
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Thanks a bunch! One-shots are super fun to make, especially the super ridiculous ones! Had a good time making this one, especially when Saul Goodman made his way onto the scene.
Taxes pay her
This implies that:
A: Nightmare Moon has heard of or met Saul Goodman.
B: Equestrian phones can reach other universes.
C: Saul Goodman is immortal.
I think the ETA really fucked up.
They clearly missed all those candies that were donated to her on Nightmare Night for the substantial majority of the 1000 years that she was on the moon--that certainly counts as "income"....
Also, the Equestria Department of Justice needs to look into that, since those donations were "given under duress"--aka "extortion"
11728855
Saul Goodman is so prolific he crosses dimensional borders!
I would imagine Nightmare Moon used some sort of magic to dial Saul’s number (though it isn’t implied so it’s up to you on how you interpret that).
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Then again, it can be determined Nightmare Moon never wanted to gobble ponies up. It’s likely a conspiracy made up by the candy companies and book publishers to sell more candy and books pertaining to Nightmare Moon.
I think the ponies who made the legends saying that Nightmare Moon ate ponies are defaming her! Nightmare Moon could file suit against the booksellers propagating the false story that she eats ponies (and probably win).
Maybe I need a Chapter 2
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I love how you don't even debate implication C.
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…I don’t even want to begin…
11728943
I can see those points being brought up in court!
Followed up with NMM suing Celestia for wrongful imprisonment.
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I think Celestia had a valid reason for sticking her up there for a thousand years; Nightmare Moon was going to commit omnicide if she made eternal night a reality, whether she knew what she was doing, or if she was simply ignorant (I’d like to think the latter is the case). She’s also a very powerful being and imprisoning her in a normal prison probably wouldn’t contain her.
While Nightmare Moon probably couldn’t sue for wrongful imprisonment, she could sue Celestia for the mental and physical abuse she had to go through while imprisoned on the moon. No pony, evil or not, deserves to go through what she did while she was up there.
Maybe I’ll make a separate fic about Nightmare Moon’s legal battles, with more thought and care put into it than this
11727184
Then you can add it. If nothing else, run it by a site mod and see what they say. But if it's not a song, I seriously doubt it would be that much of a problem.
Short, sweet, simple. Overall good read
as long you can communicate in anyway with saul goodman, he will anyway be there for you