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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Nice chapter
Agreed I go with a military style haircut but that my preference so eh
great chapter
Hey I have a mane coone very fluffy cats and will hug you when you pick them up or at least mine does
*in the distance* HEY! HEY! YOU! YOU! I DON'T LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND!
My severe PTSD :
i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/157/108/d5f.gif
Is Queen Chrysalis going to show up in the story
Happy to see every obvious one get their time to talk with Jethro about their feelings at long last. As for the possible less obvious ones, that's a big question mark for later. (Twilight? Rainbow Dash?)
What with their feelings out in the open, now things can move at a much better pace in that realm of things. Glad to see that all get sorted out.
Now we return to our regularly scheduled painful bureaucracy. Please enjoy your stay.
So far, more interactions survived. Next up. All Knight Long?
Well whether or not he will give them the greatest friend they can have.
It’s the type of shit that jethros going through is the reason I prefer monogamy
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https://m.Have jertho show derpy this
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Gemini's kind of obvious, too.
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And what have they done besides that? Moving them around is all they do.
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I wasn't referring to one single event, I was referring to his behavior over all. The example of the guards is a perfect one of going overboard.
I believe that the Author did take the advice of those of us who cautioned against going overboard because after this point the behavior of the character gets more normal. So over all the issue has been resolved in the story. I do however stand by my comments as well as me pointing out my observation to the Author. We all as writers do sometimes go overboard, in wrong directions, or make mistakes. Unless someone points these out, we cant grow in our craft or improve our skills.
Ive written plenty of stories where my editor has pulled me aside and asked me what the hell I was thinking by doing one thing or another. Its not uncommon at all for an author to unintentionally misrepresent a scene. Ive done it several times.
Perfect Example.
Editor: "Look, this guys responses and actions, don't make sense to the situation that you put him in. There is no way that he would be that angry from what he just went through. Is there a point you were trying to make?"
Me: Yes, I want this to be a throwback to his wife's death. I was trying to have him fly off the handle, and was planning to explane it in the second half of the next chapter."
Editor: "Ah, I see where you're going. But no, the pool hall scene doesn't work as written. The hero just comes across as crazy. Flys off the handle over almost nothing. What I would recomend is reworking thug #2 actions. Make him more nasty when he is dealing with the girl. Perhaps add some dialog that ties in with what happened to the wife. Since no one knows about the wife yet, you have to make it a cruel comment. This should make the heros response you wrote, more understandable."
While the Author has fixed the problem in later chapters, I stand by my opinion on chapters I commented on and I wouldn't be surprised if he goes back and edits them after the story is done.
Monk
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yeah, that's a big stretch...
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Depends on who.
Well I have an interesting problem. I was caught up so I started reading other story's and now I'm behind 46 chapter's...I don't know how to feel about this
At least Jethro has the satisfaction that, whether the answer would be a yes or a no, he can still get a reaction from Luna.
He should count that as a win, no matter the outcome.