- Member Since 17th Aug, 2016
- offline last seen 1 hour ago
ChiefKitsune
Hello everypony and welcome. Hope you enjoy my stories.
ChiefKitsune
Joined 17th Aug, 2016 ·
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Looks good
Interesting entry in this category, but watch your run-on sentences.
Christian will learn to not be so hasty, but perhaps that's why he's a good fit...
https://derpibooru.org/images/2182396 ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
i like it another
i will read, but the gender swap irritate me greatly (its a personal preference of mine to keep canon characters as true as possible when there is no reason to change them, and good reason are especially needed and equally very rare when the gender is the thing to change, the poisoned barb's tale is the only one that did it well enough to keep me reading so far and its only barely.), i might stop because of that but still, i'll give it a go if only because update are slow recently.
hope you don't take this badly, it just my honest opinion that the changes will add nothing that couldn't have happened regardless of gender aside of cliche awkward moments while adding a lot of plot-hole in the known persona of rule 63 characters.
It has potential, but you really need to work on the run-on sentences, spelling errors, and the occasional missing word. Fix that and I can see this turning out to be a pretty good read
10306629
Well to be honest I wasn't sure if I should keep Rainbow a mare or not and just have her get a temporary gender swap potion from Twilight or Zecora for the smexy times. And no I don't think that's rude it is just your opinion and I'm glad you are willing to give it a try.
And honestly, I don't care for rule 63 characters either as they seem to go way too OOC, but when I started to write this I hadn't thought of what I mentioned before. I'm seriously considering rewriting it to take out Blitz and add Dash instead. Any other readers feel like that would help improve this story? Let me know with a comment.
10307516
10304907
Yeah I know I wrote the first chapter on my tablet and it is rather difficult to do proper editing and such on one of those. I now have access to my computer so I plan on fixing it up soon.
Hmm.
I don't know how to feel about the spoiler at the start, so I think I'll wait until it becomes actively used.
Personally, I would usually prefer Gilda to be of that physicality, given the hybrid species, but I'll wait until it actually comes into play.
I would like to propose an alternate solution to having the sexy times. They could be lesbians NORMAL lesbians. Please futa is so gross and it ruins the male turn to female angle of the story. I also think them being normal lesbians would be a lot hotter.
Rather surprised the attending nurse didn't come in when she shouted in pain.
Let's see how well the pretender performs...
Was on board until the Futa showed up.
10311002
I don't like the futa either. It's really gross and it would be a lot better if they were just normal lesbians.
Great story but wouldve been better if gilda was the only futa
10311631
I have an idea on that that I think you'll like but it won't happen for a bit.
10311002
10311113
Well I was thinking of making two versions of this story one way going the futa route and the other going the female x female route. Would either of you be interested in the sexy bits being written as girl x girl. Honestly, I was trying to come up with a solution in which I could still get what I want and yet keep my readers happy and this is what I came up with.
So I ask would you and any other readers that wanted to see female Gilda and female Dash get together, like to see separate chapters with them as both girls? Let me know with a comment or a PM if this idea would keep you interested.
its short but you got some important information in this chapter so congratulations on another amazing chapter
Plz let them be cannon sex. I really just don’t like futa I find it quite disturbing.
10312543
Thanks
10312559
Well like I said if enough people wish for them to be cannon then I will write alt versions of the naughty bits to fit that and have the basic chapters be neutral between the futa and female.
10312505
this idea would keep me interested
I'm fine with how you write the characters. Anthro and blood in previous chapters is pretty much a dead giveaway that this isn't the Equestria watered down to a G rating by Hasbro. Your story... You do you. Pandering to others is a good way to ruin a story because you take may take away stuff you could use for plot later.
10312691
This is true
10312680
Well I hope you enjoy it. Though I'm not sure when I'll be getting around to writing it though. Though I can't promise that my girl on girl action will be as good or as engaging as my other content. Also depending on how it is received by the other readers I may just scrap the alt sexy chapters idea altogether, though this is unlikely as I wish to continue having lots of readers.
I'm immediately on board because futa
I'm glad rainbow is not a stallion because I probably wouldn't read it
Was gilda or dash a futa originally?? If so I wanna read that version
I read this as dr horsecock 🤣
Hehe hell yeah! Dash is a futa. I was also hoping gilda was a futa too. Wiuld kinda makes sense if she cant get a boyfriend?
Very good
I like this.
10315046 You make a very good point about that, and would make since quite a bit.
10315200
Gilda couldn't get a boyfriend because she has been in love with Dash. Every time she tried, it failed because she knew she wasn't being true to herself. It also was a struggle to admit to herself she liked someone who wasn't male or the same species when Gryphon society frowns on those kinds of thoughts.
10315451 There’s several ways one can see such things that way from Gilda homeland. First is that they are jerks, second they to prideful and say this is the right way when they don’t care, and finally they just hate the other races.
10315486
Grandpa Gruff would just push that its unnatural and goes against traditional values. The species thing might not be as bad seeing as Hippogryphs come from this pairing.
This story seems to has an intriguing character development for Rainbow.
Interesting story so far, other than grammatical errors the only thing I find irritating is how Dash speaks. It goes against her core character the way you write her dialogue, she's more informal. Not like she's informing someone of something, but not clean and professional like she's speaking at a meeting.
10316448
Well at this point in the story she is very conflicted, so much so that she wouldn't be acting like herself. I mean what would you do if you had just hurt your oldest and closest friend and then basically told them you don't want to ever see them again, then they nearly die, then you find they lost most of their memories including the one where you threw them from your life after hurting them so bad. And to top it off they remember and think you are their closest friend?
Also don't forget that Dash's usual way of acting is mostly just that an act, so I'm using this to show a deeper level of Rainbow Dash from a different view.
Eh. I really don't like this chapter because it feels very disconnected from the previous chapter. I also dont like gilda's new cock. A normal horse cock would have been better for her.
The only positive I like is gilda finally becoming a futa
10318142
Yeah I don't really like how this chapter turned out so I'm trying to rewrite it. Also, why would a gryphon have a horse cock when, last I knew, they don't have any equine DNA? Though granted I don't think either Avians or felines have knots either.
For further thoughts on these things I am going to post a blog about it.
Now i am wondering, does she have both parts or just one?
by this i mean does she/he have a 'V' hidden behind the testicles or just the single package
10318219
she will have both a set of male parts, i.e. Cock and balls, as well as the female parts, vagina and all that is attached. She is going to be for this version of the story a fully functional Hermphaprodite.
10318240
Aight cool, it adds a bit of variety
10318218
You could cut out the beginning part of the chapter and leave the part where discord gave her the canine cock. Because that's what you gave her
I am deeply invested now.
I'm excited to see just how much use that knot will get.
As long as he isn't being a idiot with his chaos, I find a lot of what that Chimera and most of what he does hilarious
10318142
She's not a horse though... She's a cat/birb and Discord is a weirdo who doesn't care about normal anatomy.
10318240
I'm just happy you openly admit that the intention is to skullf*** the timeline. I read a Futashy fic similer to this once where the author did just that and wrote cheap fixes just so they could claim they weren't. I won't go into detail but the dude in her body would have never been able to reform Discord. He would have just been made into a pawn just as easily as Gilda was in your fic.
interesting place to leave this on i think this need a update soon to move from this awkward area
10318981
Oh that was the whole idea behind most of my stories is to screw with canon.
10320982
Also I plan on rewriting Chapter 5 to better flow with the story.Mostly because I don't know what I was thinking at the time. I also may have been running on no sleep for over 48 hours so I think I was delirious.Addendum I will not be rewriting this chapter as I am unable to think of a way to do so that would help much at this time so instead I'm going to be focusing on moving forward and trying to get this story moving once more.
10341923
I like how this is I don't think it will need a rewire I would say the next chapter will need some careful planning if that is the cliffhanger it is left on looking forward to it
10341960
Thanks for the advice I wasn't sure if I should rewrite it or not and I was doubting myself that it was good enough to stand as it is. And I hope you enjoy the next chapter that I have been working on.