- Member Since 20th Jun, 2013
- offline last seen 9 hours ago
Alphamon_Ouryuken
"I am the Aloof Hermit, the Lord of the Empty Seat. I am the Alpha and the Omega"
Alphamon_Ouryuken
Joined 20th Jun, 2013 ·
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Alphamon_Ouryuken · 6.7k words · 106 16 · 3.9k views
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Well I'll be damn this gonna be a fun read.
Damn. XD
I enjoyed it a lot. Especially the punchline at the very end. 
This was a lot of dark, smutty fun!
"Perhaps the same could be said of all religions."
"What?"
"What?"
"Won't that stop my heart? And lungs? I need those!"
"Not all of your nervous system. I'm a succubus, not a cobra."
Poor Flash. no matter the setting, he's doomed to bang into Twilight over and over again...
I'm surprised Sunset Shimmer wasn't there to watch the action.
Congratz, you got featured. 4/8/2020
10171453
There is actually a vague hint that she's somewhat involved...
Oohhh another Clopfic of one of my ships...let's get this on shall we.
10171519
Are you planning to follow this continuity? I'd love to see more of Midnight and Flash as frenemies. And there is the matter of Tempest.
10172099
I'm not 100% sure just yet...
If I do, it'll probably separated into several (semi)stand-alone stories. With each one centered around various characters, but all set in the same continuity.
In the original outline for the story she was actually supposed to show up in a sort of dream sequence, she and Flash would go at it with it being implied that it was Sunset in disguise. But in the end her inclusion felt redundant so I kept it solely focused on Flash and Midnight.
If there ever is a sequel, I might use her in a different setting...
One thing a Succubus has never done: found her forever soul mate.
10172960
And Many, in Many Universes have tried, only to be thwarted by Silver-haired vampires and other assorted nuisances...
10172960
Depends on who you ask.
10172984
?
10173072
on top of mah head the only of the Succubae (not accounting mind-rape by rewriting her settings / Personality) is her, who wants to bone him but has to compete with her (Both her and her), her, her (Comedically, she's head over heels for the Mokas), and, for the Yaoi enthusiasts and fujoshis (Damned fujoshis) Him.
I'm pretty sure there are other succubi that found their one true loves but would have 2 do research.
10173121
Ah, Rosario+Vampire. Loved that series.
From what I remember, the ending was sort of an ambiguous harem option...
Anyway, the Succubi in this continuity operate under different rules.
10173072
She was interested in Tempest then again there's also Moon Dancer.
That was a great read.
Whoa. REALLY steamy stuff. Have to say, the action (both the combat AND the sex), exchanges and future story set-up in this one-shot were quite well done. Yeah, Midnight made some rather good points (and even Flash had to grudgingly admit Midnight was right about him being addicted to her in the end). Plus, the subtle implications of Sunset's assistance toward the end of that battle was a clever touch too. And, yeah, that taunting Flash concerning Tempest, well, all I can say is wow. All I can say is that this reminds me, in a good way, of a Mature-rated Tom and Jerry (if one was male and the other was female).
And, yeah, have to admit, the thought of stories set in this universe using other characters sounds like an entertaining thought. Have to wonder if there is an Incubus version of Spike in this universe who happens to be one of Midnight's proteges.
10172099
Well "frenemies with benefits". :-D
10174866
Hmm... not a bad idea.... might just go that route later down the line.
10174866
There's a lot of theories that Jerry is actually female. While it is shown that Jerry has at multiple times had relationships with female mice they never worked out in the end and it's always Tom who comes and comfort Jerry.
It's also been implied multiple times that Tom and Jerry are a lot closer than being enemies or even friends with multiple episodes showing they chase and antagonize each other only to keep up an appearance.
10174986
Midnight Sparkle through Flash Sentry (voluntarily or not) corrupts Tempest who gets added to his harem while becomes submissive with Midnight being a tad dominate while Trixie gets turned into a shapeshifting hound by her mistress for her loyalty in tracking her down to serve her and serves her plus her new master and new secondary mistress with of course orders to "Share her gift with others at every opportunity".
10174986
Or Flash and Midnight after X amount of time could simply make a 'bargain' in exchange for Midnight stopping her rampage (for a lack of a better term) he becomes her mate (husband) as before that Tempest and Flash broke up for whatever reason and of course the primary reason for that bargain is that respect eventually became something else and of course before the bargain could be made something happens causing them finally admit how they feel as they attempt to solve the problem even though the bargain wasn't made after she still 'retires' as she'll soon have family to worry about.
This is your official review from Dirty Little Secret's Dirty Little Contest!
Remember to vote in the contest's poll -- voting closes at midnight, June 6th.
And make sure to allow notifications from the contest group and/or follow Dirty Little Secret to get the full results and the awards show post on June 9th!
------ Review ------
Please keep in mind, I know I can be overly critical and negative at times. I can always find something to nitpick, even in the greatest works of literature ever written. Please don't take it personally!
-Takes place in a rich and textured ... but also kind of confusing alt universe.
-
litteralI’ve got to take points off for not running spellcheck!-
"Oh fuck! That's it! Give it to me Flash! Pump my needy, hungry pussy full of cum!"-- Isn’t this a bit much?-The sex scene is pretty simple and straightforward.
-Very much a ‘what it says on the tin’ kind of clopfic, without much layering beneath that.
-Has great potential for inner conflict and teasing, but doesn’t use that quite as much as it could.
-Puts as much effort into the fighting as the fucking.
-Not sure if his character gains much by being called Flash Sentry, except maybe the idea that him getting together with Twilight is inevitable? His canon personality (such as there is) doesn’t really show through in this alt universe.
-It’s cute seeing Flash get upset about seeing her as a futa.
-Good to see him succumb and then eventually realize he is addicted.
------ Scores ------
To clarify what these scores mean, check my judging rubric.
Cloppability: 95/100
Allure: 70/100
Enticement: 60/100
Immersion: 80/100
Prose Quality: 87/100
Total Score: 392/500
The more specialized scores for individual prizes, as well as the results of the community poll, will be published when the full results are announced. If this story wins any awards, there will be another post in the story comments sometime after June 9th announcing that this story has won.
Thank you for participating, and thank you for contributing to Fimfic's collection of clop!
Congratulations on winning Dirty Little Secret's Dirty Little Contest!
For the full results, check the Dirty Little Award Show.
This story won:
i.imgur.com/SZuZdVz.png
Centerfold
Like any good pornographer, you have a real eye for beauty. Your cover image was the best/sexiest of the bunch!
10174986
You know an alternate version of the deal to become a mate is that Midnight Sparkle makes a deal, she stops her rampage if Flash becomes not just her mate but an incubus with either
Sunset Shimmer (after having a go with Flash) and Trixie being added with the latter turned into a demon sometime later by either one.
or
It remains just the two of them.
A sequel to this would be pretty cool
10436531
Might write one in the future...
10436655
Pog
Speaking of Sunset where's she at?
11679258
She very briefly influences Flash in this scene:
11679282
I mean like after teaching Twilight and stuff where she's currently at now?
11679284
At the moment she's mostly working from the shadows, having decided it's better that nobody knows she exists so she can operate freely without being pursued.