- Member Since 28th Sep, 2012
- offline last seen 3 hours ago
Firesight
I'm an IT Brony who writes stories based on a show for 8-year old girls whose content is meant for anything but 8-year old girls.
Firesight
Joined 28th Sep, 2012 ·
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Firesight · 313k words · 289 40 · 6.7k views
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dude that is humanized beauty right there i love this story and midnight sparkle love it love it love it
Despite how hot this is—and it is—Twilight should face a hard, painfull fall after everything is said and done.
I lol'd at both of Pinkie's moments.
6732914
Wait for it....
Do you think its a predator? "I don't know Snowberry...just smile and wave and maybe they won't attack."
1) Hot.
2) Wtf.
3) What.
the fuck.
Pinkie.
6733256
Heheheheh
Theres more to come
Your going to up the stakes and cruelty right?
Photo Finish, what even...
I have to admit, stories like this aren't usually my cup of tea, but...
*follows it* What the heck, why not!
My one suggestion: you should probably put a Comedy tag somewhere in the story description.
... then. Other than that, it looks pretty OK so far.
I was right, she IS going to Iris Heart them!
6733456
Mind elaborating?
My feelings:
... Really, Pinkie, really? Oh well, I'll admit, this was a pretty inventive punishment. I didn't know what you meant by "locked outside a locker room", but now I see that you meant "locked outside a locker room in a state of undress".
Don't think I don't see you doing a parallel; I can TOTALLY see it. Now then, let's see who's next.
Huh, so next up is the "straight guy". Let's see what kind of spin you can put on Sunny... huh, that's kind of weird; I said "Sunny", but I wasn't using a shorthand version of Sunset Shimmer for once. Anyway, let's get back to th-
... Oh, I see how it is. You defined a noodle incident in a previous work, and now you're making one in order to compensate, I see. Well, I have a news flash for you... heh, that's kinda funny.
Well, ain't that ironic; the "straight guy" is into straight guys... like, REALLY into them. I never would've guessed from the movie.
Ah... and now the "straight guy's" not so straight. It's like the opposite of what she's trying to be-, It's- It's poetic justice. It's, well, it's not- not justice, exactly... Poetic evil. It's poetically evil.
Two words: Friendship Speeches. Although the time needed to take effect varies, they always work. Just look at Chry- no, she was banished, and now she's doing a bunch of stuff in the comics... or how about Som- no, he exploded and got resurrected in the comics... Ti- no, he was sent back to Tartarus where he belonged... ooh, what about the Dazzlings?! They had vibrant personalities, and they left such a meaningful impression on MLP fans that some guys used their names for a noveliza- no, they just left... where are they, exactly? OK, so maybe it doesn't work on EVERYONE, but it should definitely work on Twilight... maybe?
Ah, the other element of parody: "alternate interpretation", a theme that, if used well, can improve a fanfiction's standing through it's creativity, as long as there's a strong basis for it... don't worry, there is.
... I'm sorry, I'm missing a word, here. I remember having it, but it just... went away?... Oh, that's right, I gave all my yes'es to you. Why? Because this one, solitary line is worth ALL OF MY YES.
6733565
Yaknow..I want to see if you can manage to SPEAK after reading ch. 5
... My favorite of the Shadow 5... if she doesn't get the proper characterization and treatment she deserves, I'll take back every single "yes" I've given to you thus far... that's right; things just got serious.
Ah, just as I suspected. Discord would be proud... probably not before blushing profusely, of course.
I-... thi-... wh-... this is so messed up
So why am I laughing!?!
*sigh* Every girl says that, but they always forget to take the anime phy- I mean, the flash animation physics- into account.
*sigh* You humans and your pony worship. Why can't you be like normal people and get turned on by Undertale characters and Freddy Fazbear animatronics?... Of course, I'm talking about the gijinka forms for both.
Ah, well its been a fun story to READ so far.
6733466 Plutia is a character from the little-known game franchise, Hyperdimension Neptunia. At first, she seems like a well-meaning girl, though her countenance may seem a bit off from time to time... then she transforms into Iris Heart, where she becomes more voluptuous, gets a major sadistic streak, and she wears dominatrix-like clothing. Normally, she won't do much to her friends outside more-than-playful teasing... but if you piss her off, something so unspeakable happens that the scene isn't even visible... of course, the only people who manage to do that are bad guys, so it isn't TOO much of a problem. You should really give it a shot, it's a series that parodies the Console War, except everyone's a moe/kawaii anime girl... trust me, it's a lot better than it sounds.
6733184 Best. Comment. Ever.
6733626
I will look into it sometime
6733593 *sniff* Waifu #63,965... sacrificed to the pony gods, for they are superior to humans in every way. Sunset will avenge you. I'd do it myself, but I have no control over this story.
6733658
Well you managed to speak.... Mangonese or something but you spoke.
Do I even want it read this...? The decision to read this or not is making my head hurt!
EDIT: And where is my friend Dustchu when he needs to be here!?
I can understand Sunset making the same mistake that a lot of viewers have but I figure I'd point it out, Midnight's horn isn't crooked like a changeling's it's spiraled like a drill which you can even see in the picture you included at the end. Anyways the writing has been very good so far and I like what you've done, pretty much what I'd have wanted from the movie if it hadn't rushed the whole Midnight scene (obviously excluding any sexual bits since that'd be way too much for canon stuff).
I realize Midnight has gotten distracted at this point but she was planning on destroying the entire human world by ripping space-time into another universe, I'd consider that at least a little evil
.
6733915 Dusty's absence from the proceedings is most regrettable. When he does get around to it, this will blow the hockey mask right off his face and into orbit around the planet!
6734314 His absence is indeed most regrettable, and don't you want him to elicit this kind of reaction from the video below me or is this too extreme/too fan-boyish?
You know, this is something i would expect from a doujinshi. - Sugarcoat.
But in all honesty (
) I like this.
Oh i know, how about you make Cinich able to see all this happening and she watchs in horror on how her creation has brought apon her students. Well Cinch you want your reputation that badly well here's your new reputation, as a new event made and sponsered by themselves, Crystal Prep Sex Rally. Congrats you son of a dog and I hope you love it because...that's going to be in you mind for the rest of your life and the best part is, you started this on it's you undoing, forever. (Insert Markiplier's evil laugh)
...
...
...until Sunset erases everyone's memory (damnit Sunset!). So is Sweet Sour, Fleur or Lemon Zest's turn coming?
6734332 I don't like Fieryjoker. At all. NC wannabe aside, I hope Dustchu approves!
6734404 To each their own opinion... though I ask why, is it because strict or something?
6734426 His "Feeling Pinkie Keen" review annoyed me. The guy he brought on to represent the agnostic side of his position was absolute garbage. Also, FPK doesn't suck because FJ is a Christian, it sucks because it's so poorly written that the entire point of the episode is obscured as a result and yet he makes a big deal about being Christian. Why does this matter? Ugh... awful review. Just. Awful.
Dave Polsky has written some of the worst episodes of MLP to the show's credit, so this is no big surprise. He was surprisingly awesome in season 4 though. (shrug)
If you like him, that's fine. It's just every brony I meet mentions this guy and everything of his I've watched gives the impression that he's desperately trying to look above the medium he's critiquing. He bitches about the theme song, he nitpicks crap no one cares about like horses being unable to climb hills... just... no thanks.
Can we still be friends? Let's just be friends okay?
6734470 No worries, I was just curious why... Like I said, to each their own opinion. I ain't arguing over who's best reviewer or not. For me he's third best reviewer, the other two that exceed him would be Silver Quill and DrWolf
Wow, look at all the comments... thanks, folks! Better get started on them...
6732709
I love Midnight's appearance--it's those flaming glasses that really sell it for me. She is a total badass. And I woke up this morning to see that this story was added to the Badass Twilight group, so I can see I'm not the only one who thinks so!
6732821
Glad to know you think this is hot!!!!
All I'll say for now is that despite Sunset's best efforts, not all knowledge of the events are lost. It won't simply be status quo/as you were afterwards, for her or anyone else.
6732914
There are more to come!
6733184
Sir, you just won the internet.
6733256
1) Thanks!
2), 3) There are going to be a few more major WTF moments from Pinkie in this before all is said and done, my friend. 
After all the hype, hope you've liked the story so far!
6733312
Up the stakes? Definitely. Cruelty? I guess that depends on the definition... the one thing I *will* say is that Midnight will not physically harm anyone, transforming Cinch into a tree aside (even then, she's still alive and aware in there). She's not that far gone.
6733343
I couldn't resist.
But just imagine her picture portfolio afterwards!
6733351
Glad to have you! Guess Midnight has corrupted you too, then...
6733436
Fixed.
6733456
You know, I've learned a lot of anime terms and references from you in the course of your comments... guess I'll add one more to the list!
6734680 There needs to be some sort of medal issued to you in the service of the brony fandom for all the work you put into the development of this story.
6733611 You did a fine job doing a line-by-line analysis of this story. Thank you. I just don't have the heart to do it.
6733703 Manganese is a very pure language once it's been refined.
6734680
Does the fact I called you Raptor-jesus a few times count?
6734711
I'm still surprised he managed to SPEAK after reading ch. 5
6733486
I guess I couldn't resist taking a swipe at Flash, with the justification that not having him to try to stop her in the movie did seem like an oversight if he still didn't know that wasn't Pony-Twi.
I was hoping it'd be a crowd pleaser. Nothing against the guy really, it's just that there's no real reason Twilight should like him, certainly no reason given... though my own theory would be it's because he reminds her of her brother, which raises a whole slew of other issues.
Well, an apt one, to be sure... and more Pinkie moments to come.
6733611
I don't know, but I'll take it as a sign you're enjoying the proceedings.
Still more references for me to look up!
Good! I was really worried after all the hype how well it would actually be received...
Like I said, this was me cutting loose, and now you know the (still-partial) result. 
6733658
Fear not... she will. And your beloved waifu #63,965 will yet be heard from again.
6733915
So have you yet?
And you're right... where is Dustchu?
6734732 Should I call upon Dustchu then? He's missing out on this story here!
Not suggesting that I read it or anything, if that's okay with you
6734404 ...
...
..... (Calm down, F14m3rz. This person is entitled to their opinion, just like everybody el-)
You take that back you Impudent, recalcitrant, contemptuous pomegranate!!!
(OK, that was entirely uncalled for. Now apologize.)
Aw, but I don't wanna-
(F14M3RZ)
OK, OK. Sorry about that. In all seriousness, though, I can sort of see your point. Although, I think the "I'm a christian" thing was supposed to be satirizing scenarios where a person unwittingly slights someone else for saying something that offends them. You know, irony and all that. And I'm fairly certain that it was a co-reviewer who "complained" about ponies walking up cliffs. Not to mention... his review of Mysterious Mare Do Well was one of the best reviews for an MLP episode I've ever seen.
But you know, entitled to their own opinion and all that jazz. Now if you'll excuse me, I have an argument with a split personality I apparently have to get back to.
6734274
Hmmm... looking at it again, point taken. I'll probably modify that section a bit, then.
Thanks! Yeah, they did rush it a bit, but that was still a very powerful story climax (no pun intended) that really elevated the the whole thing. But can you imagine if they did animate these scenes? "Next on Adult Swim... Friendship Games: Special Edition!"
Actually, I wouldn't mind seeing some artwork of these scenes. I may end up commissioning a few before all is said and done.
6734310
An evil act, yes. But not so much coming from an evil mind or design. She's basically a young child with a bunch of brand new toys, one who sees the world as her new playpen and her classmates as objects for her amusement. I consider that apt for the circumstances, since she strikes me as the kind of person who had a childhood devoid of much in the way of friends or play.
6734338
Hmmm... you know, I like that. I may have her say that line.
Good to hear!
As I'll explain in a future blog post, this was me, a normally 'serious' adult fiction writer, taking a break from my usual fare to in order to completely cut loose.
All I'll say for now is... we'll see.
She may yet find she didn't quite succeed.
And most definitely! I was actually still waffling on whether to include Fleur in the festivities since she's not technically one of the Shadowbolt six, but I think your question just solidified it--yes, I will. 
6734680
I see Midnight helped corrupt another soul, then.
You're welcome...
Your efforts were *very* much appreciated, sir! You pointed out a couple things I needed to fix, and I did. As always, my work is better for your efforts, and I owe you big for this.
I actually tend to think that in this canon, she may yet live past the end of this story.
Guess we'll have to see!
I have seen pony versions of Midnight... but yes. To be sure, Pony-Twi does have her own dark side. We've seen glimpses of it. She wouldn't fall like Midnight because she's been immersed in magic her whole life and thus wouldn't be overwhelmed by that kind of power, which she mostly already has anyway. When she gained the power of all four princesses in the battle with Tirek, she didn't succumb to it.
6734751
Feel free!
And it's your choice, of course, but I'd love to see you read it!
6734757 I still hate the guy, but points taken.
Edit: This story is hauling ass! Way to go, sensei!
orig14.deviantart.net/4db7/f/2013/310/5/8/no_brakes_by_galapagois-d6t9svv.png
6734782 I did... but it is so wrong and yet enticing at the same time...
6734789 It's all good. Besides, I dislike Lilly Peet to some degree.
{...}
What, was it something I said?
{You take that back you imp-}
Oh, no, here we go again.
6733652 But if you want to know what character personality-wise that Sci-Twi most closely resembles, it's Rei Ryghts.
Initially, she's a meek, pitiful young woman with severe confidence issues and her "peers" lambasting her at every turn. Then, when she has power forced upon herself, she transforms into a more... interesting person. For one, her personality does an entire 180 and she becomes a lot more confident, though a touch on the nihilistic side. Then, she becomes so powerful that she can destroy dimensions and create portals at will, plus it took the power of all the main characters just to knock her out. Once she goes back to normal, though, she becomes much like her former self, with the added benefit of a necessary confidence boost.
6735410
gargh, more anime references I don't understand.
Curse you Japan for making so many things worth watching, without increasing the lifespan of humans!
6734795
So you liked it?
And it is only going to get even more wrong yet enticing from here...
6733565
You know, I still get some grief for that on Turnabout Storm, but what nobody seems to remember is that it was in part based on the script for an unused scene given me by NeoArtimus herself. She was originally planning her own exploration of the noodle incident and Trixie's backstory.
As for *this* noodle incident... stay tuned.
6733351
Forgot to mention: at your suggestion, I did add the comedy tag. Thanks!
6735757 Yep... and I'm calling upon Dustchu, he's needs t see this now!