Have any of you saw the Everfree Forest bloopers with the Rainbow Dash scene? Well here it is you are all waiting for with MLP meets EqG.
Chapters (2)
- Member Since 27th Jun, 2017
- offline last seen May 30th, 2023
Cutest Boxer Puppy Ever
Hey! It’s your favourite boxer here. Just chilling. Won’t be on much though we can catch up on discord.
Cutest Boxer Puppy Ever
Joined 27th Jun, 2017 ·
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Wait...where's is fluttershy into this chapter?
Why is it divided into 2 chapters? Neither the format or length justify splitting it in two.
The engrish is stronk in the description and short description.
8473266
I put in Fluttershy.
First off, I love the picture that you used for this. The image alone of Spike looking at his doggy counterpart like "Really?!" Is hilarious.
That being said, this story is honestly a confusing mess. There is so much wrong with these two chapters, that I would make up an entire chapter myself just talking about it.
I would suggest either doing some SERIOUS editing to this fix it, because it almost reads like someone who was drunk tried writing it, or get a damn good proofreader to help you out with this. Because, as of right now, I have to give this a serious down vote.
If you can somehow fix this mess, that down vote might be removed. But right now....yeah, no.
8473497
Peppermint frost is my editor she edit it and I’m just practicing writing. I just want to show everypony my skills how I write and who I’am.
8473500
I suppose this isn't bad. I love the concept and love the cover art. Needs a bit more.........fleshing out. As a suggestion I would recommend writing just a brief outline of what you want to happen then start making a more detailed outline of each event and use that. You'll find writing longer more involved chapters becomes much easier this way where you can easily crank out 2000 words and feel like you have barely written anything.
Feels... rushed
sorry, I really tried, this story looks like your teacher assigned to write a fic but you don't want to do, but in the end, you write something just to not turn in a blank assignment.
try to improve the story a bit and I'll remove the downvote
8479413
It’s not my fault I’m just practicing.
I understand it might of been rushed but all these bad comments could really hurt her feelings. Just imagine if you had people hating your work.
8564075
Thanks, Rain I hope other people know how I feel.
Quite short; could be longer? No hate, though.
8699520
I needed some positive feedback on this story. Please don’t forget to like.
Thanks!
8564075
Look, you made Rarity cry!
Yeah, with you on that one. Come on, guys, everyone's different and everyone has a different taste in what they want to write. Seriously, enough with the hate.