• Member Since 12th Jun, 2016
  • offline last seen September 15th


A good story displays a moral, the best ones attach you to the characters who display them.


One day, Applejack takes the Cutie Mark Crusaders to a mysteriously secluded corner of the farm, and when she sends them all home: each arrives with their own gift.

However, despite the treasures being similar in purpose, the way the fillies use them couldn't be more different.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 25 )

You have wonderful diction, solid pacing, your dialogue is organic, your description is colorful, and the formatting should something to be marveled. You're a talented author with a solid understanding of storytelling.

“Not to me, but to your momma. How did she react? Was she proud that you were datin’ [Rumble/i]?”

A bit of an error, as you didn't close the italics.

But this was great. Really great. :twilightsmile:

Holy.... this was amazing!!! You are such a good writer! So much talent.

... 'Masterpiece' is a fitting description, to say the least.

Before I read this, what is the Dark tag for ?
And how bad does it get ?

Whether this one gets too dark is for you to decide yourself, my friend. Some things can only be explained by the experience itself.

Fixed it! Thank you. :twilightsmile:

Thanks, guys. :twilightblush:

A story truly fit to be a masterpiece. :twilightsmile: I am honored to have played a roll in making this a possibility, no matter how small it was. You truly are one of the most talented writers I've ever met.

As for the rest of you reading this...

1. Remember to give this story a thumbs up
2. Leave a review! Those are important for keeping the spirits of an author alive!
3....you have three days before I do what I did to Alderaan... :pinkiecrazy:

Three days...


Your flatter me too much. :twilightblush:


I DO NOT FLATTER YOU ENOUGH!!! :flutterrage:

Let me start by saying that this is a great story. It made me lose sleep, and that's pretty unprecedented. It is rare for me to read a story where I send messages to my friends about it at one in the morning.

Now, about the main theme. This is a story that tackles the sexual and it does it really well. The bit with Scootaloo hit me like a truck, for various reasons. It made me sit down afterward, actually. You tackled the entire thing with a respect and gentleness that is really appreciated. Neither Scootaloo or Rainbow Dash was demonized for their view of the Treasurefruit, but it made it clear that their view was not an optimal one. Speaking of the optimal view, I really find it interesting that you take that view. It's not about love; it's not about "happiness" or, let's be honest, pleasure. It's about unity between a husband and wife. And that... that is something that is overlooked in modern society.

I think that everyone in the fandom should at least take note of this story, if not read it. May God bless you and yours as well.

Thank you so much. It warms my heart that you appreciated this so much, and your review brought a tear to my eye. :twilightsmile: :heart:

Yeah, it is always a blessing to find stories like this. Stories that value the ideas of old, not because they are traditional, but because they work. And if it is written by (I assume) a fellow Christian, or at least a fellow Theist, I tend to be interested.

Stunning! Like I've said before, you are an incredibly talented writer. This took much dedication, and it shows all the way through, from beginning to end. Absolutely stunning, a true work of art, a Masterpiece. :heart:

Would you mind adding a Spoiler over the middle paragraph? :twilightblush:

This story was excellent, moral, while keeping within the spirit of the show and the characters.

The decisions, mistakes, all of the little details that the characters showed gave them life that most people miss or simplify in exageration.

You earned a fav and a thumbs up with this tale, one that should be spread out more as it deals with delicate topics masterfully.

Yeah, sorry about that. I'm still learning the ins and outs of the site. :twilightblush: It should be hidden from those nosy enough to read the comments before reading the story. :pinkiehappy:

No worries! I still haven't figured everything out either. :twilightsmile:

This is a very memorable story. The allegory's a little on the nose, but it's strangely touching all the same. It's almost quite perfect...

...However the sudden Dash/Tiara lesbian ship at the end comes out of nowhere, feels pointless, is downright inappropriate (seriously, soliciting lesbian sex with an essential stranger on the day of your mutual friend's funeral?) and clashes with the story's otherwise straightforward, traditional morality. (Though, it's confusing as to whether the reader's supposed to approve of it or not.) To be frank, I have no idea what was the point of including this part. It feels like it was included because the author felt there had to be lesbians somewhere.

Thank you. :twilightsmile:

Well, you're not far off with that assumption. The intended point was they're shutting out their grief, attempting to console each other. It's a bit of unpredictable circumstance that I've found to be common in life: unforeseen, and unfitting.

Even though i saw the tags, it was admittedly more dark than i anticipated, and i was confused with how the changes in the CMC's lives happened and how others got to where they were, but overall i liked it.

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