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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Please don't let the skithuvud be Cheese... I don't want to have to explain why I backhanded Weird Al...
7094638
It wasn't Cheese Sandwich, it was somepony who lived in Ponyville. Worst Pony.
7094645
Oh, thank Luna... I don't think this story would've been a viable excuse for assaulting a comedian, heheh
Ding! Roll Credits.
Somewhere, some time, on Sweet Apple Acres a hole was dug.
What went in that hole is unrecognizable as a pony any longer.
CSI's called to the scene after Ponyville's upteenth disaster this year found surprizing results.
100 different hoof impressions were able to be lifted from the coat.
75 different feather fibers were strewn about the body, most of which on the snout and nether regions of the decedent, some might even if griffon in nature. It would account for the claw marks in the belly.
And magical signatures from 20 different unicorns showing massive fire, telekinetic, gravitational, and frost magic.
The Princesses have gone on record saying it was a time traveling super villain they teamed up with the Ponyvillians to put down and to avoid paradox was buried in an unmarked grave on Sweet Apple Acres.
Owner and proprieter of the farm went on record, "I can assure ya, as mah title as the Element o' Honesty that snake got what was commin' to him."
This has been Black Plot Bunny news, now back to Thanatos with the Obituaries.
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Yikes.
Awwwwww, poor Pinkie Pie! Ooooh that pisses me off, cause I've met a guy like that before! I wasn't dating or anything, I just heard about it from my friend, who told me about him. The fucker needed to get his gut punched in and his skull caved.
It sickens me that, even in Equestria there are assholes like that.
But I am so glsd Tarnish is here, he's a good sport, and I admire his awesomeness.
Good show man, good show.
7094638
Your avatar... it amuses me.
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They had to go somewhere when you banished them from the Weedverse.
And they've been breeding in mine, like, well rabbits.
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The black plot bunnies.
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Though I wonder if you closed the borders to PTSFFF?
It technically takes place in the Weedverse along a further timeline. . .
7094735
Rated E, for Everypony!
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Alright everybunny! You heard the boss. That new stake of land has been quarantined!
Start hopping your fluffy little tails full of sorrow and death back toward the Chaseverse.
I got a feeling you're going to be getting a lot of work when the Mirror Travelers recoup.
That's right, single file, nice and neat. Yes, yes, praise overlord Angel Bunny.
So, how does Equestria deal with all the hair washed down the bath drain?
Not clicking that spoiler, though I really do want to know who this offender is. And i am sad because of the number of guys with that mindset is depressing.
7094757
I'm guessing specially bred sewer weevils cared for by diligent earth ponies.
They crawl through ductwork and pipes devouring the protein rich hair before it can become a clog of smooze-like proportions.
7094645 Worst pony you say? But Tarnish's dad is the worst pony.
Isn't it against the law to damage a national security asset? Princess Twilightsparkle needs to drop on this guy like a smart bomb.
7095068
i.qkme.me/3s3k1d.jpg
Just remember, wherever he may be the Dude abides.
Awesome work as always, Kudzuhaiku. I can relate to Teapot's dilemma regarding adult relationships. I am a late bloomer like Teapot and I am still learning how to navigate those same perils myself. There are times when I feel overwhelmed as well, trying to balance everything. But these relationships are important to me so it is worth the trouble.
Lastly concerning Worst Pony, here's a haiku.
Note to Worst Pony
Wash thy neck, miserable swine
For your end is nigh
5-7-5
Now I'm picturing a scene wherein an actually angry Maud uses the full force of her strength to get the offender's attention.
Nothing like splitting the nearby earth in twain as a way to say hello, eh?
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One punch down upon the ground, a fissure opens, and the earth just swallows him up.
7096275 Tarnish will come with and *heh heh* well:
CHOO CHOO, MOTHERBUCKER!
7096480quickmeme.com/img/24/242a2c2704b07b9c4dc08751582fd2c8f2c7546ec854ee3c7f982de2061b9cac.jpg
THERE ARE NO BRAKES.
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Very good! And then the Pest Pony summons the crawlies out of the sewers to deposit the digested waste in the compost haulers wagon, thereby eliminating the need for any kind of sewage treatment plants!
7094638 agreed, though i dont think cheese would be that horrible... Or at lest i hope mot because i really want to stomp a hole in who ever she was with....
7094638 lol
I know those feels pinkie...
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That's a bit more extreme than I was picturing.
Wait, did we ever say what race this mysterious love interest is?
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A pony.
7101707 okay well did we ever say what subspecies of pony?
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The worst kind of pony, obviously. You know the type.
7101724 Well, It's not Thunderlane is it? Because we know it's not gonna be Big Mac and I doubt you would put Bulk in that type of situation but for the love of god it better not be Time Turner.
7101728 It was Frank.
7102216 soooooo.... Who's Frank?
7102217 Eh, you know Frank. Everyone knows Frank.
7102544 *$&^ing Frank.
*$&^ that guy.
Got to love Pinkie and Maud. Here's something funny for yall to laugh at
I haz a feelz that whoever hurt pinkie is going experience pain... Soon
7101724 also a fairly stupid pony. I mean come on. You just cheated on an element of harmony, who has a very dangerous family and lots of powerful friends. He's gonna get pulverized
7124516 :just sighs in resignation:
7125452
Mellonella Moth.
Speaking as the writer, Twilight does not have a counterpart.
The magic involved will be revealed in time.
But Celestia is not Helianthus. Not exactly. It's complicated.
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It might just be me, but I see an unspoken 'yet'.
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Maybe, maybe not.
These counterparts seem to exist so that some aspect of the Princesses can go out and explore, discover new things, and do good deeds, but that's nigh Twilight's job.
Go out on orders of the Cutie Map, solve problems, discover new things with magic and SCIENCE!!!, have fun.
Her counterpart will likely sit in court and deal with stroppy nobles all day
Hah, Tea and Sympathy, like the play by Robert Anderson. (theater major)
Any-who, carry on. nothing to see here.
define flirty, is it being slightly suggestive? Cause they went beyond that in the previous chapter.
7108112 very soon
hmm i wonder how charbroiled dickshit smells like
There is no such thing as 'your own needs' in a true relationship.
why was i expecting tarnish to be barely holding back murderous rage
lot OF him
was A peculiar
At first I was thinking he should actually be worried about the stallion, but then I realized he should worry about Maud going to prison.
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A dude did that to one of my best friends.
Some of his lesser injuries were a pair of broken ulnas.
I may be slightly overprotective and/or insane. I do not tolerate asshats like that.
I brought him flowers in the hospital room, he started blubbering and yelling for the nurse to take me away. He was yelling so loud they had to sedate him and wouldn't let me visit him.