What happens when an Timber wolf goes to Ponyville for an new start on life........how will the Ponies take it when one of the most feared monsters of the Everfree enters their town for the purpose of living among them? Even worse what will happen to the little town of Ponyville when somepony starts to fall for the Wolf in Wood!
Oh boy I need an hard drink
The cover art is what I believe to be what the Timber wolves should look like
Now enhanced with artwork by _vidz_
You making Twilight marry blueblood? I'm no longer reading this.
how do you Twilight feels about this?!
6212121 No it not me making twilight marry Blue but it's Blue who being force to marry but I can say they are not getting marry I have plans for em
6212143 we'll find out how Twilight feels next chapter
Ok I'm listening
You sir, had my curiosity, but now, you have my attention.
Happy Writing,
-Bright Light
6438955 great I hope you liked the story........crap I have fallen so behind on updates I need to get back on writing the chapter......shit all of my stories have fallen behind I need about 9 to 10 chapters to get all of them up to speed
6439020
I really liked it, and I hope to see more from you.
Happy Writing,
-Bright Light
6439043 thanks I will get a chapter out when I can..........what you like most about the story
6439059
So far, I like the character, and the story, also whenever I read the character's lines, I feel like he has an Irish/Scottish accent, so yeah, the story so far is pretty well done as well.
Happy Writing,
Bright Light
6439082 Yes Oakfang dose seem to have a Irish/Scottish every time I write him and I gals you say that the story is well written it's always my greatest worry
6439098
My good sir, I think you have earned yourself a follow, why? Why not?
p.s. I'm on my way to check out your other stories, so expect comments from me in some others.
Happy Writing,
-Bright Light
6439107 thanks for the follow and I hope you enjoy my other stories
(I came here from this other Timberwolf story, which is featured right now.)
A lot of the chapter titles say "edited", but honestly, there is still a lot of editing needed. Mostly grammar mistakes such as run-on sentences; incorrect use of commas, quotes, and other punctuation; random capitalized words; and the occasional typo such as "Sweet Apple arcs" (Chapter 1 part 2).
Let's take an example (from Chapter 1 part 1):
This long, run-on sentence should really be divided up into several sentences (separated by a period ".") and clauses (separated by a comma ","). There are also a few incorrect words. Here's a possible corrected version:
I've also noticed that you misuse "an" instead of "a" quite a lot as an indefinite article. For example, in the first paragraph of Chapter 1 part 2, you have "an caravan", "an very familiar town", and "an sneer". These should use "a" instead of "an". The general rule is: if the next word begins with a consonant sound, use "a", but if the next word begins with a vowel sound, use "an".
Don't let me discourage you from writing! This is just a drive-by friendly critique. I think this story has a lot of potential if it is executed well.
6449485 sigh- I tried editing the story myself after nobody was willing to edit the story........I'm not much of a editor but now that i'm a much better writer I may just rewrite the whole thing when I have time
I hope you gave twilight a choice on the matter celestial because I sure as hell wouldn't want to be married to that little prick if I was in her situation.
6515184 don't worry Twilight and Blue never get together
How does a story with zero views gain 52 likes? hacks
6846224 an complete rewrite that's how
So I kinda forgot how this story came to be in my taking tab, I think I some hoe stumbled upon this story but it had nothing in it. hmm It's coming back to me know the story picture caught my interest and then I read the description which captivated me even more but then I saw that it was under rewrite and tracked it in hopes of it being re published.
So that means I have not read the original story which can be either good or bad depending on how one chooses to look at it. But I'm glad I tagged this story and with just this prologue you have me wanting more.
Now I want to know who fell in love with Oakfang (btw i love that name) and all this other stuff.
Oh well I will just have to wait for the next chapters then.
I'll read ya later then
-BFBL
Is Blueblood evil in this story?
7015773 Nope
So, a story about a timber wolf. You have my interest. Please, continue.
7017248 oh I will
It shows.... promise, the dark brotherhood and I will be watching *Melts into the shadows*
7206696
very interesting so he doesn't like the sparkles huh? also first comment!
i am a bit saddened by the sub-par grammar but the story is good non the less.
oh and whats with the two apostrophes ('') instead of quotation marks (")
7227097 are you sure those are apostrophes? they look exactly the same to me
7227202
try to select them and you will see that the first is two separate characters while the second is one character. the font i use (Mono space) makes the difference really obvious in the story. the weirdest part is that you used quotation marks
oncetwice in the chapter but the rest are apostrophes.7230843
This story is cool
Okay so the rewrite is complete good job. Now please don't take this the wrong way but,
For The Love Of All That Is Good Please, Please, Please try to get A editor for this story. I really do like it but man it needs an edit badder then...then... Okay I can't think of an analogy right now.
I'm so sorry if I came off as mean or something negative but this story really needs an edit.
Now as for this chapter itself. Ignoring the need for major editing it started off nicely and the interactions with Trixi and Oakfang are nice.
For me the Blue Blood and Guilda parts came straight out of left field. But now that I'm thinking about it they're not that bad.
Well except for the part were you mention Celestia forcing BB to marry Twilight. That I could understand sending him to ponyville to learn humility and respect but an arranged marriage? Really!!!! Plus I'm sure she would not want to marry him. Especially if they go together like oil and water/fire and water like BB said.
Really besides the massive story wide edit needing to get done. As it really blows emersion of the story right out of the water.
And the whole forcing BB and Twilight to Marry each other I enjoyed this chapter.
I'd offer to edit this but I don't have anytime.
-BFBL
Please if you feel like I have offended you in anyway I'd like you to say what's up so we can sort it out. Because believe me I had/have no intention of doing so.
7424721 I been looking for an editor for this story for a long time and still haven't found one
Is very good very sad
MMMOOOOOAAAAAARRRRR!!!!
7554322 soon
7554384 okay......
7554384 Well, at least your username is well chosen.
It's appropriate, because "soon" is still not here.
8180462 it will come soon.... just been very busy
Very good
8361082 thank you
https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/755095/stories-important-news
Hmm, intriguing story premises. Would like to see where this goes.
I very deeply want to give this story a chance, but the grammar is, no offense, atrocious in some parts.