• Member Since 28th Dec, 2013
  • offline last seen Monday

Mayhew Cullen


Forged from the eldest fires and cast upon the seething shore, broken and remade, alive and dead. We are killer and monster, savior and saint. Now I am become writer, creator of worlds.

Sequels1

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Chrysalis is dying and she has but one thought on her mind. When she is gone from the world, who will care for the one thing in the world she values above life itself?

What will she sacrifice? How much of her pride will be thrown aside? To what lengths will she go to ensure her daughter's life? Will she beg a mortal enemy for mercy, not for herself but for an innocent foal? She is already willing to die for her child so what else could she give to be certain of the filly's sustained happiness?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is my entry for the EFNW 2014 Writing Contest. I'm really happy with it so it doesn't matter whether I win or not. Seriously I'm glad I got to tell this story.

Alright big shout out time. As of March 13, 2014 the impeccable Goombasa has posted this... HERE ... Now that a YouTube fanfiction reader has read one of my stories I am one step closer to world domination!

New big shout out time! As of August 28, 2018 the lovely CountessRose has posted this HERE ... Now that a second YouTube fanfiction reader has read the same story as last time, I am yet another step closer to worlds domination!



Now on to the important details, the shout outs to the artists responsible for the vectors and background I used to make the cover art.
The Chrysalis Vector
The Celestia Vector
The Background
Many thanks to them.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 317 )

I love it.:heart:

All the feels! All the f-hnnnnngggg... *dies from adorable overdose*

3980984 No! I'm so sorry... I did not mean to kill you with cuteness... but seriously thanks. I love getting feedback of any kind but it really makes me happy knowing that people enjoyed what I wrote.

3980996 I suppose I should feel bad for making people cry, but it is a sadfic so I guess the story is accomplishing exactly what I meant to have it do. So thanks for your comment.

3981434 Thank you, I'm glad you liked it.

Can I have more pwease

3981783 Well that is a bit of a delicate topic... the answer is a resounding maybe. I do want to finish more chapters on my other project before I take on more side work, but even then I don't want to make sloppy ill-conceived additions to this story and end up pulling a Lucas basically ruining peoples' memories of the original. That said, if I become inspired and have a story that I really want to tell in this continuity I will definitely write it.

If someone dares give this story a thumbs-down I will hunt them to the ends of the Earth.

WRITE MORE OR I WILL CUT YOU

I'm reminded of that line from the Lion King about how the great kings of the past are up there looking down on us. I can totally see Crystal talking to her birth mother eventually. I do want to see some shorts of Crystal growing up, this teaching of how to make a proper book fort interests me and I can only imagine all the antics she gets up to with her various aunties.

3981994 Dude, there's already two...You know what you have to do.

3981994 Um... you really don't have to do that... though I guess it's kind of neat that you like it that much.

3982034 Um... I refer you to the above reply... and maybe also the below reply

3982036 You know I didn't think about that but I think you're right, it is a little like Disney's Hamlet the Musical... I mean The Lion King. And here I promised myself I wouldn't get inspired to write more of this the same day I posted it. The really fun part is that you have basically listed a large portion of how I plan to expand on this story. Also speaking of book forts, the teaching will be fun, but the failed attempts that lead Twilight to teach Crystal the proper method will be fun to write as well. And yeah various aunties... so many aunties.

3982106 Does she get to join the Cute Mark Crusaders???? Because that has lots of potential. Oh yes, if at some point Crystal happens to get attacked by a monster, you might want to have Chrysalis's spirit appear and fight off the monster.

3982101 You know when I see comments talking about things like thumbs down like Dark Shade's, I always feel like it's just daring people to give thumbs down because right afterwards they suddenly crop up. Oh well I've got enough love from everyone else that a couple thumbs down aren't going to ruin my day.

3982106
3982101

Alright, I've taken care of the 'problems.'

However, I do not know their login information. Thumbs-downs don't count if their giver has died due to entirely natural causes, right?

3982130 That would be kind of neat... like an adventure subplot... Now to decide on a worthy monster...) For the other idea I will have to create a new set of CMC members because the time setting in this would assume that Apple Blossom, Sweetie Bot and Scoots-to-the-Loo are old enough to be banished for not having their cutiemarks... or they probably got them and would be in the process of recruiting new members to take care of the club house and continue the glorious tradition.

3982157 Um... I don't think the internet works that way.

While I would not object to a sequel, I'll say this right now, your story manages to end in nearly the perfect place. 9.5/10

3982106 WRITE IT NOW I EXSPECT 600000 CHAPTERS BY TONIGHT WITH 2000 WORDS EACH OR NO CUPCAKES

3982215
You clearly haven't been to the right parts of the Internet.

...Why don't you come with me, little girl...
...On a magic carpet ride...

3982268 Um... I need an adult?

3982258 I am now frighteningly reminded of a certain pink pastry chef and her... unusual cupcake ingredients. Also I'll meet you in the middle and write a no more than one hundred over the span of a couple years.

3982237 That's nice of you to say, thank you. I won't do a stand alone sequel, I will write a collection of shorts that will expand on but not interfere with this story.

It almost seems like Chrysalis was Celestia's daughter? Hmmmm.

3982420 That sounds like hearsay and vicious rumor... you'll never prove it! There's no evidence! I'll take the truth to my grave!

Or I might reveal more information in the future.

3982454 I wouldn't say hearsay or rumors. There might not be some concrete evidence either but if you read between the lines it sure seems to go in that direction or maybe I am overthinking it. I will say this much though I love it!

3982503 Well mostly I was joking but it just surprised me to see that you were reading between the lines, not just taking things at face value. Which is good.

It actually occurs to me now that your comment is kind of headcanon. Well my story is fanon so maybe it's more like headfanon... I'll do some research on that, but thank you. It's always nice to hear that someone has enjoyed something I've made.

3982195 Manticore or Hydra gets my vote, something big and bad. But yes, the original CMC most likely have their cutie marks... and should be supervising the new generation in finding their own marks. Just make up an earth pony and a unicorn pony... and maybe an alicorn. By now Shining and Cadance might have had a kid right???

God damn, I cried :'|

3982683 I'm sorry, do you want to talk about it?

3982618 Oh or Stephan Magnet! wait... no, he was a nice guy... with a half-Rarity tail/half-self stache(So yeah, Stephen Magnet has best mustache)... yeah the unicorn is easy... it's the filthy mud pony I'll have trouble with... Wait that's it! Big Mac and Cheerilee would also probably have a kid by then as well. Perfect, it even uses my second favorite Big Mac shipping. But I was figuring that Cadence and Shiny's kid would be more of a rival to Crystal, a la DT and SS

3982771 Last line made me laugh and cry at the same time.
You sir, have made a grand story and I thank you for sharing it with us.

3982771 I'd say more friendly rival, I can't see Cadance raising a Diamond Tiara like pony. And Shining would have shipped a brat off to military school the moment he got a series of bad reports. So I can see them competing, but I can't see them being enemies like DT was to the CMC

3983045 Well that is mostly true, I was really over-exaggerating when I used DT and SS as an example... then I also remembered that Big Mac and Cheerilee would keep their filthy earth pony child in Ponyville thus making it difficult for her to be a member of the Canterlot chapter of the CMC... but I have figured out the unicorn. So I'm right back where I was...

Welll.... apart from the formatting derp at the end. Nice story :D

3983106 Hmmmm.... how about the kid of a royal guard??? That gives the Earth Pony some back ground that could include fighting skills and better than average strength.

3983140 Formatting Derp repaired! Yeah that was weird...

3983165 Yeah that might work, fortunately I'm not on a time table as far as writing these goes so I can work at a laid back pace.

3983318 That is good. It makes it easier on everyone.

This is why we need a [Cwute] tag.

Oh, my... the FEELS :fluttershyouch: my heart is going to esplode! :heart:

3983776 Aw, thanks. I'm glad you enjoyed it

3983793 And yet again my body count rises from the most terrible weapon known to man... uncontrollable cuteness and emotional overload.

I won't lie here............I have to fight from tearing up when I read these kinds of MLP stories. :raritydespair::pinkiesad2:

Profile Picture is cutting an onion
You monster, you get a kick out of these feels don't you?

ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED IS THIS NOT WHAT YOU WANTED?

3984104
It's not just an onion getting cut, it's an onion cutting ITS SELF.

Well, that's adorable.

W-why you heartless monster!!!! :scootangel: :fluttershbad: :raritydespair: :pinkiesad2:

Amazing job on the story. You moved even me, and that's impressive. Keep up the good work, and if you ever need a pre-reader, feel free to drop me a PM.

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