Hate, violence, and wars have continued to ravage the human world where Twilight Sparkle had once visited to save her crown. Princess Celestia, Twilight Sparkle, and her friends come to this world under a new spell that would help them stay to their true form as ponies, in an attempt to bring peace and love to this world. Problems quickly arise and Princess Celestia begins to believe that she is God in both the human and pony world.
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Good Story, it dose not need all these down votes just because others disagree I am a Christian and I am glad that you spread Gods teaching through this fandom, do not let others stop you.
I didn't downvote this because it's about Christianity. I downvoted it because it's a terrible story.
3190240 Thank you so much. I'm really glad that you enjoyed the read. I will do my best to continue to write more.
Wat
The message is good. The story behind the message was... well, alright. Interesting. Not a fave, but a like.
From one brother to another, I'm praying for your strength in these times of increasing opposition.
The downvotes are because of Christians?
...
I GOTTA READ THIS XD it looks really interesting anyway. I'll like it before I even read it lol. And considering one of the rating tags, there might even be some action with Celestia's massive flank. ;) lol.
Hey, anyone remember that one story by a Christian brony about a ship sinking or whatever?
I hope this gets a similar response
3190265
I'm with you on this one. I couldn't get over the initial scene. Principal Celestia was what really got me. It was as if she was some robotic sheep.
Sorry Brian, not getting a like on this one, no matter how much I wish I could give it.
3190627 Thank you for the prayers. I'll admit, this story was by far the most difficult story for me to write about. I had a lot of trouble writing this story. Writing stories can be hard for me because I have many learning disabilities including A.D.D. and Autistic Spectrum Disorder.
3190265 I have never down voted anyone else's works even if I didn't like reading it. If I say any kind of criticism to actually help them improve upon their story, then I always make sure to say something very nice or encouraging to that person as well. Saying someone's story sucks or is terrible is not kind nor Brony like because it does nothing to encourage the author and some people do work hard on their stories. Many of my more popular stories that have little to nothing to do with God are rated as my best even if I feel that they aren't nearly as good as my more obvious Christian stories, so yes, there are many people who strictly down vote stories just because the stories are Christian. Most of my voters make that quite clear to me in my other stories.
3190865 That's ok. I don't need your likes. I wanted Principal Celestia to be drone like. She's a Principal, she has seen so much. It's hard to impress her. She seemed drone like to me in the movie. Princess Celestia can also be quite drone like as well so it makes sense to me why I made her like that.
3190983
I'm not you. If I don't like story, I downvote it. Tough.
Did I say there weren't? No, I said I wasn't one of them.
Anyway, the dialogue is stilted and awkward, the characters act unrealistic and in some cases utterly ridiculous, and the message of the story overshadows everything with its blatant obviousness.
It feels like I'm reading a Jack Chick tract. Seriously, I'm half expecting your next story to have the Mane 6 start committing ritualistic murders and sacrifices after playing Dungeons & Dragons, or Rainbow Dash explaining to Scootaloo why gays go to Hell.
3191168 That's funny you mention that. I actually played Dungeons and Dragons a few times with a Minister and it was quite an enjoyable experience.
I love the story but I have a question: I feel bad about people telling you about stopping you from writing Christian fictions. As much as I am a Christian myself, doesn't it ever occur to you that ponies only believe in Celestia? I mean, I don't even think there is a God in Equestria. All I know is that some mystical alicorns rule the universe... well at least from people's headcanons. Sorry of I troubled you buy asking that question.
3193573 I'm glad you enjoyed the story! Thank you for reading. It's unknown in the official show which is one of the reasons why I created this in hopes to make a story out of it and give an explanation as to how Celestia and Luna came into existence. There are so many questions one could ask about the show. We do know that they existed for at least over a thousand years because of the whole moon banishment incident and that Luna is younger than Celestia. I don't even recall an explanation about Discord's origins. I'm almost positive that I heard Lauren Faust say that Celestia and Luna were supposed to be the only two alicorns in the show as well as other little ideas that she had, but many of Lauren's ideas did not make it because she is not working on the show anymore which saddens me a bit.
While you have a right to a degree of bitterness if what you say about your treatment is true, that doesn't alter the fact that your story is rather mean-spirited and knowing why that is the case doesn't make it better. Plus, the evangelising about god was out of character, a tad inexplicable and rather heavy handed.
The best way to work Christian evangelising into an MLP fic, IMHO, would be to have Celestia presented as an Aslan equivalent in a HiE.
I hope you don't take this wrong, but, WHAT'S WITH THE FOUR-LETTER-WORDS!?!
3195744 To make the story seem more realistic. Remember, I was inspired to write this story because of the things I see in the fandom and that includes those four letter words that you are referring to.
Yay! So glad to see a writer so proud of his faith! I probably won't do stories like this, but thanks for this one! I didn't really like the pacing of this story, but I'll like it anyway. See you in heaven someday!
3200196 You're welcome and thanks for the kind words.
oh gosh, I was eating when I started reading this... got to the part where the guys were perving on RD and I had to stop...
Maybe after my meal and a good rest after work than I'll continue, too many R34 pictures are flowing through my mind to concentrate on eating and reading at the same time...
3230559 Yeah, you might not want to do that. Some other gross stuff happens later on too.
The rating should have been clear that this involved sexual themes and gore. I wasn't fooling around as to why I added those two warnings to the teen rating. Come back and try again when you're done eating. I don't want you to get sick while reading this. 
3195984 I know that why it was put there, doesn't mean it was right for you to write it.
YOu couldhave just said "he cursed" or soething.
Plus, how accurate is it when they say "heck" instead of the H-word? If they say the f-bomb, they say the h-word and Gd's name in vain.
Not that I hate your story even though you wrote some mucho innaproppriate stuff in there. In fact, it needs a little more work, and I agree that Celestia should be used as a Aslan figure, but still an interesting use of her.
But I probably shouldn't have down voted it maybe I should up vote it for the good stuff.. I needs some work with the writing, I didn't like the bad stuff, and the stroy is great, but the sotry could be edited slightly.
BTW, is it okay if I write a formal review to this story, I really mostly liked it.
3231319 Sure, I understand if some things in there can be very upsetting. I don't know if I will go back and edit or add anything else to this story though. I'm pretty happy with what I have. What I wrote in there has purpose. Remember, I'm not supporting the "bad" stuff in the story just because I'm writing about it. I'm clearly speaking out against it. It's kind of hard to write about the bad stuff without saying much about it, especially when it's such a major problem in the story. There are lots of bad things that happens in the Bible too. I'm pretty sure that if the Bible were ever published on this site, that it would be rated mature for sexual themes and violence. Instead of getting so bent out of shape about the sins written in this story, focus on the ending of this story. It's about redemption and the power of Christ's forgiveness. That is the most important part of this whole story and it should not be overlooked.
tap... tap... tap...
this... needs... More... APPLEJACK!!!
Heheh, seriously though... initially I thought I was going to hate... okay maybe not hate, but really, really, really, really dislike this story of yours when I first started reading. Admittedly, I made up my mind at the beginning not to thumbs it up. But near the end I began to see the reason for you writing it. Alright, just like the blacknerd that got me into this whole MLP mess; I'm going to review it his style: I'm gonna give ya the bad, I'm gonna give you the good... and I'm gonna give ya the neeeeerdy...
First the bad:
I felt the intro, and subsequently the entire fic was very rushed, the scene at the beginning where the ponies entered the human world and they first interacted was quite messy. The way humans degenerated into perverseness was too fast to seem realistic. The part where Celestia suddenly wanted to be a god over the human world can be described as rushed as well, it would've been better to analyze how she descended into that mental state where she would even torture Fluttershy through killing her animals! And this is glancing over the fact her second contact with people ended with murder! Nukes would've been dropped on her royal flank the moment the world governments knew about that. And though this is mainly a Celestia focused fic, it would have been better to see more reactions from the mane six and her own sister, Luna, both in the human world and Equestria. As this level of obsession would warrant a more personal and heartfelt response, especially when both worlds have been thrown into chaos. And Discord? Way too fast, just Boom! And that's it, an anti-climax if ever there was one... I'm being a bit harsh because I saw great potential in the story, and that's just me with stories and movies, if the whole thing was meant to be silly from the start, I'm fine with it having a silly ending. (the Pinkie Amplified kind of silly, NOT the Badminton fiction, I still have nightmares of poor Apple Bloom... >.<) But this fic could've been so much more, well, at least in my mind... but I'm sure this is one story that would benefit from having multiple chapters and more love and care placed into it...
Now the good:
I like how you tied in EQG with the fic and getting the 'humans' curious about the pony world. After a scene like that ending in EQG, heck I'm surprised half the school didn't freak out! But nooooooo the weirdest part of the whole thing was a talking dog! ugh... anyway, the idea I liked because I personally thought of it before, was the two sisters being placed in Equestria by the 'Creator' and were given the task of rising the sun and moon respectively. If given more thought and written with more care, I believe that it could have a great storyline about the perfectly created sisters before the coming of Discord and the fall of ponykind, and the eventual evils allowed to prosper in Equestria such as Chrysalis and King Sombra. And dear Twilight, I like how you portray her here as the level headed student who cares for her princess, because I get a vibe from most of your fics that she tends to be a bit overly judgmental and pushy with her opinions. With a bit more touch up on her parts, and she would be the perfect teacher's pet we all know and love. 
And of course, the part where you portray Jesus as the ever loving Savior was a nice touch, having the fiery blue glow amidst the smoke and radiant light shining brightly gives an image of a powerful entity that resembles the way our Lord will return in the second coming, not a weak human being (as being portrayed by most artists) but as a conquering king.
When I realized where you were going with the storyline I went 'yes!' in my head because I have thought of this idea before (no thanks to some inspiration from your side) but I guess you beat me to it.
And now for the Neeeeeeeeeerdy:
The Princess took out the special chest that held the elements of harmony. She opened it up and placed each element on the proper pony.
Last I checked on Keep Calm and Flutter On, Princess Celestia left the Elements of Harmony with Twilight for safekeeping for exactly these kinds of emergencies!
I was thinking, the way these ponies are portrayed to have intelligence and powers far above normal animals, can't they be regarded as some kind of angel/seraph/cherubim? Most of the time when such creatures are mentioned in the Bible, despite a few having completely human looks, their appearances are usually a mixture of man and beast or just beasts. So... following the idea of this story, can Equestria and it's ponies just be another form of angelic beings with their own personal 'Garden of Eden'? Just speculating and fantasizing here... I'm very tempted to plagiarize your story and re-write it, than I will be famous on FimFIction, forever! Muahahahah... MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Alright, time for me to go work on my own fic, it's been a week and I haven't even gotten pass page one on my new chapter...
So I'll see ya next time, love ya like a play-cousin, I'm outie 5-thouzand! Ching-Chomp... YOMP!!!
3232497 Look at the fandom and tell me how fast the fandom degenerated with perversions and strife. I can only imagine how much faster it would happen if the ponies were actual in the flesh creatures and met with the fandom.
I would also imagine that problems would arise quickly when one believes that they are god when they are not and have the powers to do all sorts of things. She sees these things that disgusts her and wants to take action immediately. She thought she had the right to punish them for their sins. She was playing god after all. Problems would arise very quickly.
Discord was made to be a surprise because Celestia couldn't remember because of her amnesia, remember?
Everyone thought he was good and was working on their side now. He is a deceiver, a backstabber, and a liar, and he fits the character of Satan very well.
Having more of the main six would have been interesting. I agree, but again, I wanted to keep this short and be as Celestia focused as I could.
Pinkie Pie Gets Amplified! is by far one of the most funniest fics I have written as well as a few others. I do like to write comedy quite a bit, even if it ends in insanity.
Thanks for the review and for taking time to read this. Best wishes on your new upcoming fic!
3232902
Oh it's easy to go nuts and pervasive when you know it's just a show and they can't zap you back with magic... plus the fact you can hide behind a computer screen and a fake name. But in real life, people aren't so open with their dirty secrets or hobbies. Not everyone goes around yelling "I'm A Clopper!" (granted there are exceptions) and most are embarrassed on the inside about their sin. Now in front of real life creatures who can talk back at you, and have emotions and can judge you for your actions... think about actual girls, most people would not openly sexually harass girls because they would get into deep trouble, and they themselves would become social rejects.
If anything, if someone is stupid enough to attempt some sexual disruption, the rest of the kids (and adults) would outwardly chastise them and even the ones who have dirty thoughts would side with them as they would not want to be thought of as weird and disgusting. And as human beings we will naturally be cautious when first encountering something new and strange.
About Discord, what I meant was the way he was turned to stone was too fast... kinda hoping for a showdown. ^_^
Oh my fic is still the same old one, just adding a new chapter. But still, you have my thanks. :D
3233211 That's a good point, but there are many cases where that's not true. Some of the pony groups and pages I have seen on F.B. are clop related and it was pretty alarming how many likes or members it had. I would imagine that people join them under their real F.B. names without any shame.
I have seen people post clop stuff like fics, or borderline, or implied clop pictures where the rules say "NO R-34" on F.B. groups and pages as well and no one seemed to care or actually liked it. I have seen so many people type out that they love clopping and are seriously proud of it under their real names. This is very common.
Even though you look at what is the current number one rated group here as well as the groups that follow closely behind it, you are correct. Most people don't use their real names here, but I'm sure if someone REALLY wants to find out who you are on the internet, then they have ways to find out no matter how much you try to hide your identity.
I'm sure if the clop craze is this extreme in the fandom, then I'm pretty sure that there are many people who would be very open about it even if they met real life creatures like this. Much of this fandom doesn't even surprise me anymore when it comes to this because I have seen so much of what people post in the non-clop groups on F.B. and they think it's so awesome and cool to share stuff like that under their real names.
I also know Christians who have struggled or are struggling with porn/clop in some of the groups that I'm in, but they come asking for prayers to help kick the habit and I'm more than willing to pray for them or to take the time to have a conversation with them if they may ask me to.
Anyway, I hope you're able to finish your fic soon and I hope to read it too! I still have yet to finish Duskfall! I have been so busy with writing more stories and I want to continue my (SiC) series.
3233722
than I shall patiently await more from you!
(heheh... I haven't finished Duskfall neither... one hoof at a time I guess...)
3233722
I know this may derail the comment section a bit, but why is sexual perversion the only thing worth focusing on here? Going off of what Jesus says in the Bible, the big offensive thing could be greed, narcissism, inequality, pride or divorce. Unless the point is that Celestia's obsessive moral crusade against the perversion is a terrible world-destroying thing and we should all stop before we, too, risk destroying the world.
I'm a little confused about the moral with Discord; is it that if someone seems to reform, we should go ahead and kill them anyway just to be sure? I mean, it doesn't even seem like Discord did anything this time around. If I forgive somebody and then ask them to help me do something that eventually goes wrong due to my actions, do I really have a moral claim that they harmed me and thus require re-imprisonment?
While I'm not against the concept of this story, it practically begs to be fleshed out. The rise, fall, and redemption of Celestia: God of Two Worlds befits a sprawling epic. Especially if we are also going to be exploring the appropriate application of Christian values and the nature of God in parallel universes at the same time.
I would like to ask a question, too: What should Celestia have done instead upon discovering this other world?
3245980 It's not. Did you miss the arguments, the fighting, the wars, the hate?
Was Discord truly fully reformed? Watch the very ending of the episode Keep calm and Flutter on and look at everypony's faces when Fluttershy says that he's a real sweetheart once you get to know him. Like I said in the story, his name is Discord and he represents Satan in this story. The Bible says that Satan will not repent. Did you remember why the Elements of Harmony was created in this story? Do you remember what the prophet from God said in this story? Do you remember what Discord said, before he was turned back into stone?
There, Discord was in his luxurious room that he had the Princess build for him. "Well, well, well," he said. "It looks like you have finally come to your senses. I know you came here to turn me back to stone. It's too bad you know that you'll miss the powers that I have given you and the fun we've had together. I know that I will break free in the future because ponies will turn to hate and bitterness and I will be free to roam again!"
Even the word Discord appears in the Bible...
"There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers."
To answer your question....she should have listened to God.
3247054
I guess I'm more worried about where this rhetoric has led to in the past. "Is X really reformed?" has led to some real horrors from the Jews of Europe to those who have Bourgeoisie relatives in Communist countries. The constant demand for - and rejection of - "proof" of redemption goes to terrible places. And I'm not saying he did anything wrong; he simply didn't do anything wrong this time. They had already forgiven him his past misdeeds. Compared to Celestia - who slaughtered people and almost casually embarked upon xenocide in your story - he's a relative saint.
As a literary criticism, If you are going to have him play the role of the devil, though, he ought to point this out to her while playing upon the other ponies. "Was it I, Fluttershy, who slew your friends? Was it I, Twilight, who sought to destroy the Bible? Why then must I pay the price while a murderess walks free? Does not your scripture have a verse in which a crowd chooses one criminal to spare while another is condemned? But fine, wash your hands of me if you must..." Taking down the Devil - if only temporarily - ought to be a major confrontation.
3248813 The reason why he went down so fast was because I wanted to make it crystal clear that the Devil is powerless compared to God and Satan does not stand a chance against Him. Satan is big and terrifying to us, but when God is with us, he has no chance. That's the reason why that confrontation went by so fast.
Great story, could have been written better and could have mentioned sodom just cuz hey they did tons of sins. Anywhore WE'RE ALL GOING TO HELL, NO ONE IS PURE. MARTYRS FOR MY LITTLE ONES!!!!! DIE WITH ME!!!!!!! -krieg
The devil isn't evil, just misunderstood. He wanted to be better then god but god wants to be the only one can't blame lucifer for wanting power it's a corporation. Well that's just me, cuz god annihilated the world like twice. Plus god made us have different languages if you remember in the Tower of Babel. Hey did you know that the Greek and roman religion connects with Christianity. I very much like theology it's a fun subject.
This was a good story. You answered my questions in the comments; the clop focus, the anti-climactic confrontation with Discord. At first I wondered why the humans rushed to Rule 34 the ponies. Then I thought back to how a lot of anime or video games get R34'd almost immediately. Your story brings that into focus. You also gave me some ideas for fitting Jesus into Equestria. Keep writing these stories and stay encouraged. We may be seeing the next CS Lewis someday.
3330104 D'awww. Thank you very much!
Expect a new (SiC) story out very soon!
i am an athiest
i do not believe in a god
but this is too hilarious too complain about
so keep writing and expect hate for these types of stories
3395812 No worries, I'm used to all of the "love and tolerance" from this community when it comes to my fics.
3395864
as long as you dont scream about god in your fics i do not care
In sorry that people send hate messages to you. I'm not excactly a Christian, but I'm fine with any religious people as long as they don't go ultra religious.
I'm sorry you have so many haters.
If it helps, you're one of my favorite authors!
JESUS LOVES YOU!
3406062 Thank you so much.
Um...this is a weird question about this chapter but...who is the united planetary leader of all of bronyism as described in this chapter? Lauren Faust? Black Gryph0n (Gabriel brown)? TheLivingTombstone (Joab Landau)?
3568716 Princess Celestia is.
3568840 Oh. Any sort of hierarchy of subordinates or something?
3598834 I wasn't thinking of any.
That was sad and happy sorta.