So many close calls, so many potential hesitations, so many things that Twilight and Spike could have done differently, and they'd have failed. It doesn't matter what they did wrong or didn't do right, only that a split-second is all the difference Sombra needed. Now, Twilight is completely at Sombra's mercy, subject to whatever mind games he has planned for her...
Recent viewing of The Crystal Empire is helpful but hopefully not necessary. Special thanks to Mickeymonster for drawing the image that inspired this story.
Chapters (5)
MOAR!
I liked it
Will read later. this seems promising.
I like this a great deal.
I kinda hope the next chapter is from her friends' point of view. I woudl like to know how they are going to handle Dark Twilight. Ooooh, and especially Celestia's reaction. 
2959889 I thought about that, I really did. Of course, I have no idea how I'd handle that. It's hard enough writing things from Twilight's point of view...
Keep it in Twilight's point of view. Everyone wants to write a diverse story, but with a story like this, I think it would be more compelling, not to mention unique, to focus exclusively on Twilight's POV.
NOOO RAINBOW DASH NOT MY WIFU NOOOOOO
SCREW READ LATER FAV'ED! Also have you considered corrupting the rest of the gang to show case twilight's new found power?
2965884 I... thought about that. I must admit, I'm not sure how I'd actually go about doing such a thing.
Maybe if the villain were Nightmare Moon...
"...I may have lied." I lol'ed at that line.
Dark magic sounds like it is MUCH more powerful. Hoping that more uses are demonstrated later, after Twilight manages to take care of the others.
2966108 Well from what I understand about King Sombra's dark magic it's true power lies in it's ability to corrupt. While it does have other properties such as summoning dark crystals and allowing it's host, I think of this power as though it was The Darkness, to cheat death a certain number of times the real power of it comes from the fact that it can corrupt even the purest of hearts... in fact I like to think it was this magic that caused Luna to become Nightmare Moon to begin with. Let all this information sink into your brain for a moment. It corrupts by showing a person their worst fears and greatest anger till they can't handle it anymore.
As an optimist, I love happy endings. I really hope they can stop Twilight and Sombra and fix the corruption. Don't want to rush it, though; a rushed plot is never a good thing. This is already going fast enough.
2967873 Corruption is indeed a core part of it. I myself think of it as being a lot like the dark side of the Force, in that its mere usage can corrupt the user, which we saw in this story when Sombra took advantage of Twilight's use of black magic. I guess the main problem I have with not corrupting the others is that, in my opinion, you have to take the first step in becoming evil.
2968805 Yeah, I've been going along at quite a pace. It's supposed to be a short story, though, about four chapters, though I'm having such trouble deciding between endings (There's several ways this could go at this point) that I may have to write them all...
2969687 Well maybe after fighting Twilight they start hearing and thinking certain things.
Have you ever considered submitting this story to Equestria Daily? You can find out how to do so here.
Honestly I feel like three chapters of build up and then it all being undone so quickly was kinda anti-climactic. I have various questions about where the other main 6 were for all this time and why Sombra would have let Spike, Shining, and Cadence go free after he got the Crystal Heart. If Sombra were intelligent he would have interrupted when they started getting to Twilight. So while I enjoyed the first three chapters this one just seems kinda thoughtless and rushed sorry.
2973145 Oh drat, I knew I was missing something. I was going to explain what happened with the others and what their battle plan was but I didn't get the chance...
2973145 After much consideration, I've decided to republish the chapter, with a minor edit. Honestly, It might be possible to rewrite it such that, say, Twilight throws her friends into the dungeon, and it's there that she meets Spike, Shining Armor, and Cadence, but I don't know how to make her snap out of it from there.
Did you never plan on bringing Celestia or Luna into this story? It makes sense that evil Twilight would eventually face them which gives you more time to write some good scenes for her. A fight between them would also allow for Celestia/Luna snapping her out of it whether by reason or magic. I'm no writer and this is the most I've ever written on FimFiction but I enjoy corrupted Twilight fics and you have my upvote no matter what.
2975857 I thought about that, but Celestia's such a chessmaster she doesn't need to show up to enact her will, and Luna... come to think of it I did have plans involving Luna later.
When it comes down to it, I wrote this story around ONE scene, the scene depicted in the image, and I'm proud of how it's come so far. It was never intended to be a long story, just a short "what-if" revolving around that scene. If I felt like it, I could still write side-spin-offs, but that's if the muse strikes.
Gah, I hate how I'm constantly making micro-edits. In this case, I accidentally left out a part of chapter five, at the very beginning. It's not critical, but it's in now.
If the sequel comes to be, can you let us know by adding a chapter in this story? You know like a lot of stories that have sequels. And by the way I found this a really enjoyable read. My only little nit-pick is that in Chapter 4 Twilight turned back a little too fast, but how she turned back, that was fine.
I can't wati for the sequel! Make sure to link it or somehting.
Oh I feel deliciously cruel for really liking the way you wrote Sombra with his cruelness towards Twilight's friends...
But with that being said he sorta sounded like Discord a couple of times in the HOW of his mocking towards Twilight. As well a a tiney bit rushed. But I still look forward to reading this!
I know what it was... Hehehehe....
lib.store.yahoo.net/lib/yhst-132942998239747/logo-2.gif
Let the haters swarm... Hehehehehe
2991667 Oh, you.
And yeah, it was just a teeny bit rushed. I mean, I was really on a roll when I was writing it, just getting everything out, and I didn't want to stop for anything. I just wanted it to be... out there.
Might have helped if I'd have stopped to look things over. Or if I had an actual editor.
3003760 Yeah... it's a mistake I deeply regret making, but on the other hand I'm not sure what I could have done to pad the story out more.
I had ideas, but not the knowledge of how to implement them.
I was always under the impression that the crystal trap would merely delay her and that she simply could afford to risk everything by making everyone wait on her figure her way out. That's just me though. Nice start to a grim story.
It was short, but I think its a good thing to be able to tell your complete story relatively quickly. To be honest, if you'd written this as one single long chapter, and tightened things up it would be called an awesome one-shot.
2991667 Boo! get off the stage!
*Chucks rotten tomato*
This was a good story
...until it had that crappy ending.
You just can't do that, author. It had a good plot, she turned dark, you know the rest, but then it all turns into a pile of trash. This could have turned into a nice, long, awesome story about Twilight finding out about the true magic of friendship, but instead, you had to go with the sappy, lazy way.
Basically;
She turns dark, straight away back to good.
What's the point in the story? This is for constructional criticism purposes. Cherish it wisely.
Is It Just Me Or Did Sombra, At Times, Seem Like He Was Trying To SEDUCE Twilight? (E.g, Forcing Twilight To Bow To Him, Caressing Twilight Chin, Etc.)
3055276
I agree, I wish the author would have sticked with Twilight being dark a while longer(like nightmare moon did). Then do some horrible things (except kill her friends and family) then put a scene where twilight talks with princess Celestia turns good and BAM great story. But noo-ooh
Rainbow Dash... Dead? No... No... No... NOOOOOO!! NOT DASHIE!!! DASHIE IS NOT DEAD!! SHE'S NOT! I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT!! NO! NOPE NO NO NO NO!
*chills down a little* F*ck you Sombra. F*ck you. 
Sombra: Mwahahaha I killed Rainbow Dash!!! The world shall nao be mine!!!!
Le me: {insert hahaha no gif here}
if it were me writing this
i would have had sombra stop them before they completly saved her
leaving herself in doubt of whats going on and causing a mental battle about what she thinks is real or lies
but NOPE
just a dues ex machina of "hey twilights good again!" after being evil for LESS THAN ONE CHAPTER!!!
Oh damn.
You did that scence beautifully I actually saw in my mind's eye Twilight get corrupted and I saw the dark magic take ahold of her
Brilliant start. I put this off for way too long. I can't wait to see what the next chapter shall bring.
Oh, by the way, you portrayed Sombra awesomely. Intense, with shadows and the power to control fear as a mere side act.
Awsome sauce‼‼
Um there's a spelling mistake in your Authors Note.
"You didn't think I was just going to have Sombra beat the rest of the Mane Six offscreen like that, did ou?"
The word you is misspelled.
Still love your stories though.
the Problem is why would the sisters take so long to act. that's the only flaw so far.
3003853
Heh, you don't need to pad a story to make it flow. In fact, that's a mistake often made. You can always PM or Skype me to bounce ideas off of for anything Sombra-related. I've written him and those in stories with him in a wide variety of ways and can always help guide a fellow Sombraphile to discover the best way to tell his tales
4059699 I agree with you. I think there are WAY too many stories of the good guy turning evil and then turning back, and not enough stories of the good guy staying evil.
FLUTTERSHY!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY FLUTTERSHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU MONSTER!!
7988010 I had to re-read that part to remember that... I thought I'd done the whole "This is what happened to your friends" part later in the story.
...I should give this quite an overhaul, I've been putting that off.
My only problem is that twilight didn't stay evil
Because I like evil (insert random character).
Thats why
8159506 I tend to be more about redemption stories, so having her stay evil was never part of the plan. Besides, I don't think Twi's personality really fits with being evil in a long-term sense. Not in this particular instance, anyway
I did have a separate idea where Sombra corrupts her, without any mind-control, and she never really does return to the way she used to be...
You should add the Alternate Universe tag