• Member Since 15th Aug, 2012
  • offline last seen Aug 28th, 2013

TCSNxs


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It's often been said that the difference between friendship and love is a small, nearly imperceptible line that's easier to cross then most think. After Applejack saves Fluttershy, one discovers the other had crossed that line some time ago.

A/N: FlutterJack/Appleshy. Currently searching for artwork.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 7 )

You have a lot of stories that require endings, good ser. I believe this is off to a good start and I do want you to continue, but bewixt this and the LunaJack... Please don't forget about this one! :yay:


The 'Wearwolf.' Interesting. Green eyes....almost thought it was Applejack. But then, which pony would save Fluttershy?

2609139 I know, believe me. My day job tends to be odd with its schedule, but the second chapter is partially done and the Lunajack will complete shortly to, fwiw

Thanks for the comment. :twilightsmile:

I have to ask why you felt the monster chasing Fluttershy in the beginning had to be a 'wearwolf.' It doesn't ever end up doing anything you couldn't have done with just a timberwolf instead. The chase and the fight themselves were done quite well, but it just feels like you lost a bit of credibility making up something whose role could have easily been filled by something already established in canon.

Other than that quibble, though, this is an interesting read and I look forward to further installments.

2675580 Good point. The issue I had with simply using a normal timberwolf is, to me, the things lost some of the "terror" factor when AJ knocked off three in one scene and Spike choked out the "Alpha" with a pebble(!) in "Spike at Your Service". As such, it wasn't much of a challenge. Then again, the action scene was a bit short. The original draft was actually extended out to close to a 1000 words by itself and has some "gore" factor. Honestly though, it was long and drew away from the intent of the story. It was never meant to be a part of it long term.

Not to mention I didn't want to tag the story like that when the whole thing is meant to be a bit silly.

Given the circumstances, I wanted to use something new as the Everfree is, in my headcanon, a largely unexplored and malevolent place, so creatures of legend should exist in it. Manticores and ambiguously gay, fashion conscious sea serpents already do. Hence the wearwolf.

I understand its a bit weak, and I agree with it to a point. But those were my thoughts.

You just had to name him Doctor Feelgood, didn't you? Now I have that song stuck in my head!

Nice story, though I felt that some of its prose was overcomplicatedly formulated.
I realize that most writers try and make every sentence a work of art, but in the case of this story it was a bit distracting.

:coolphoto:

There are many errors through and through, but I really really like this story. However, I do have one real problem with this. AJ is a terrible liar. Like, she CAN'T lie. You know for a fact every time she lies. This does not follow that, so I feel it lost a bit of her character. Other than that, all is good :twilightsmile: keep it up!

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