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Pumpernickel & Monster 27 stories
Found 27 stories in 45ms

Total Words: 1,279,887
Estimated Reading: 3 days

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T

After Nightmare Moon’s banishment, a mother struggles to cope with the death of her daughter and the lies being told about Princess Luna. In her despair, she is driven to a desperate attempt to find closure.

She will visit the moon in the Dreaming, and bring back her Princess of the Night.

Now on Equestria Daily!
Finalist and 11th place finisher in the Writeoff.me Great Expectations event.

Thanks to my editors: Alicorn Priest, Tek and Seether00

Chapters (1)
T

This story is a sequel to The Traveling Tutor and the Diplomats Daughter


A simple test with an unexpected result sends Princess Twilight Sparkle’s life in an unexpected direction, accelerating a high-speed collision course with the young magic tutor she met and fell in love with just over a year ago. But angry Griffons, arrogant Royals, in-laws and other mighty forces from Canterlot and beyond seek to tear the young lovers apart and enforce their own will upon their future regardless of either Twilight or Green Grass’ plans for a life together.

Too bad for them.

Thanks to my editors: Peter, Logan, Featherprop and Tek
Featured on Equestria Daily

Cover Credit to Micah Weltsch at Micahdesigns on Instagram.

Chapters (36)
T
Source

When the Royal Wedding scatters defeated changelings all over Equestria, a member of the hive winds up being captured in Ponyville, tied up, stunned, repeatedly shot by a cannon, and held against his will.

The truly frightening part is he’s starting to like it.

Thank you to my twisted editors: Tek, Seether00, GameKnut, Cerulean Blue and Peter
The picture Pinkie Pie uses Party Canon is from Atmospark at DeviantArt

This story is listed as comedy⁽*⁾ because the author has an odd sense of humor. No changelings were harmed⁽¹⁾ during the production of this story, despite what the newspapers printed or the ongoing lawsuit from the ESPCA⁽²⁾. The management would like to remind all readers to spay and neuter your pets. Unless your pet is a changeling, in which case…


(*) Dark humor, to be exact. If you are someone who finds pleasure in the misfortune of others, enjoys watching the occasional inept chainsaw juggler or cheers during a NASCAR crash, welcome home. Also, get help.

(1) Excluding blunt trauma, thermal impingement, chemical exposure, radiation, thaumaturgic infusions, and confetti ingestion. All characters represented, including changelings, are the exclusive property of Hasbro, no matter what they may shout at you from between the bars of their cell. Any violence or pain inflicted on the changeling in this story was simulated on a stunt changeling with special effects and mirrors. Except for the cannon. There is no truth to the rumor that Queen Chrysalis provided the stunt changelings from a supply of disobedient changelings in her dungeon⁽³⁾.

(2) Equestrian Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Arthropods

(3) The Changeling Kingdom does not have dungeons. They have Call Centers. It explains a lot, actually.


Here is a link to some appropriate background music to listen to while reading: Piotr Tchaikovneigh’s 1812 Overture

Additional Note: This story is tagged Sex because it has the occasional reference to… well, sex. There are no explicit references, but there are things.

Chapters (21)
E
Source

This story is a sequel to A War of Words - The Opening of the Guard


For centuries, the stallions of the Royal Guard have protected Equestria from every danger imaginable.
Now they face a new threat to their position that will not be so easy to defeat.

Mares.

- - - * - - -

The story of four mares who answer the call to guard Princess Luna, and the troubles they go through to gain acceptance and respect in their new jobs. Or it could be considered to be the story of four interlopers into a traditionally male role and the underhanded tricks used to secure their position despite their obvious unsuitability for the job. Pick one.

Cover photo credit to the fantastic MuffinExplosion at DeviantArt.

Thanks to my editors: Peter, MSPiper, Featherprop, Seether00, GameKnut and Tek

Author's notes on the development of the story and characters may be found here.
This is a sequel to A War of Words - The Opening of the Guard which is featured on Equestria Daily

Chapters (11)
E

The Job of the Royal Equestrian Courier Service is simple. Whatever the Princess needs sent anywhere, they deliver. Whatever she needs brought back, they retrieve. But sometimes the delivery is the least important part of the trip.

The elderly unicorn Zircon was a courier in the Royal Equestrian Courier Service, a position normally dominated by pegasi. Because of his age and ground-bound nature, he tends to draw jobs that fall between the cracks. Now he has been tasked by the Princess herself to travel to his old hometown of Ponyville while being overseen by a young black unicorn mare who has invited herself along for the trip. But this time his job is turning out to be less the delivery of a package, but the way in which it is delivered.

Can be read as a standalone, or as a second chapter to To Sleep, Perchance to Dream ‘Two Unicorns’ is my first MLP fanfic, and was written before ‘To Sleep,’ with recent edits thanks to MaskedFerret and Nyerguds. The Nocturne saga continues from here with Genealogy (or The Mating Habits of nocturnes pegasi, and various other stories along that line.

Chapters (2)
E

Ditsy has an opportunity to earn a few more bits for Dinky's school fund by making an early-morning delivery of a dangerous cargo. One shot story that occurs before : To Sleep, Perchance to Dream

Chapters (1)
E

Nightmare Moon may have been defeated, but Princess Luna still struggles with her inner nightmares. It was so easy to give into the temptations of power the first time, now that she had a taste of it, can she give it up for good? Or will she return to her old ways and have to be banished again, this time forever?

Chapters (8)
E
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‘Twas the Night before Hearth’s Warming, and all through the castle…

On Hearth’s Warming eve, Princess Celestia has always spent the night alone in her private study, allowing the castle staff and most of the guards time to spend with their loved ones on this night of friendship and family. But tonight she has a present of her own to give to her faithful student, a gift that has been needing to be given for years.

The beautiful cover art was done by Earthsong9405 on Deviantart
Editing assistance by Peter, Shaleclaw, Sarcasmo, Tek, and Themaskedferret
Featured on Equestria Daily in 2014

Chapters (1)
T
Source

This story is a sequel to Diplomacy by Other Means


When a diplomatic mission to the griffons goes wrong, it falls to the Royal Guard to extract the ambassador and warn Princess Celestia about the upcoming surprise attack. Unfortunately there is only enough time to accomplish one of their tasks.

Done as an entry in the 2013 Equestria Daily Memorial Day Weekend FlashFic event.


A standalone story done two hundred years before the events of To Sleep, Perchance to Dream, Two Unicorns Walk Into a Village and Genealogy (or the mating habits of Nocturnes Pegasi).

A prequel for Diplomacy By Other Means


In memory of the brave men and women of the Bureau of Diplomatic Security who have lost their lives in defense of our citizens overseas, including:
Ambassador J. Christopher Stevens
Sean Smith
Glen Doherty
Tyrone Woods

Chapters (1)
E
Source

The first time we danced, she broke my jaw in three places.

The life of a disposable minion in the service to the Dread Ahuizotl is filled with acts of senseless violence and hardship, normally ending in a hospital or unmarked grave, but for Disposable Minion #3, the job just got more interesting.

He fell in love.

And love hurts.

Credits to the amazing Luvlessi for the cover art
Background music: The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer
With a wonderful reading by Luvlessi
And a second reading by Crafty Reads
Featured on Equestria Daily

Chapters (1)